by Nicola May
‘Great, super, that may just work as Petula is having a sleepover at Jemima’s. Thanks ever so, Inga. You really are a brick.’
‘Who teases your husband’s prick,’ Robbie whispered in Inga’s ear.
Inga felt like punching him.
‘Call me in the morning,’ Emily shouted imperiously as she headed towards her car.
‘Do your worst, bitch,’ Robbie sniggered. ‘Call me too. Young Gordy deserves a treat, you know that.’
Mr Chambers assisted Joan’s brood by helping find their lunchboxes and coats.
‘You look tired, Joan.’
‘No more tired than usual,’ she replied wearily. ‘Just a few things on my mind. Nothing that can’t be sorted though.’
‘Good, good. Remember I’m always here if there are any issues with the children.’
‘I appreciate that. Thanks, Mr Chambers.’
‘Call me Will.’
‘Thanks, Will.’
Joan got on her bike. God, she could do without her children’s teacher fancying her now, although it was rather flattering.
The boys started play-fighting in the road, while Rosie ran alongside Skye without a care in the world. Thankfully Mo was at the surgery this afternoon.
Joan couldn’t think straight since this morning. How was she going to approach Mo? She didn’t want her to think she was being underhand. Oh, why hadn’t she just told her in the first place? Level-headed, sensible Colin would know what to do. As soon as he was home she would discuss it with him then ring Mo. Mind you, the ‘drink’ Charlie senior had mentioned would come in handy at the moment.
‘Come on kids, homeward.’ She raised her voice as they continued to ignore her. ‘Today, please!’
Mo was at Joan’s front door waiting for them when they turned the corner. She pulled Rosie to her and gave her a kiss. ‘Good day, darling?’
‘Yes. Look – I made this in pottery for Daddy.’ She revealed an earthenware mug-type creation with the word DAD written inside a pink heart.
‘That’s lovely, well done.’
‘You finished early,’ Joan said brightly. ‘Right, let’s get this lot in and the tea on.’
Mo couldn’t believe the first thing that she said wasn’t about Charlie senior. Her suspicions were raised even further. Come on, Joanie, tell me. Please keep our friendship real, Mo urged in her mind.
Joan put the kettle on and looked at Mo playing with the kids. The poor woman had been through enough. Should she really worry her now with Charlie’s recent antics? If it was Colin, would she want to know? Yes, of course she bloody would! How could she be so stupid? Mo was her best friend and whether good or bad, she should know what her devious ex-lover was up to. Mind you, she did still wonder how much ‘the drink’ Charlie senior would be offering her if she did cough up.
Once snacks and drinks had been issued to the young hungry mouths, she made a fresh pot of tea and sat at the kitchen table with Mo.
‘I have something to tell you, Mo.’
Not even caring now what she was going to hear, Mo shut her eyes with relief.
‘I found a business card from Charlie senior in my jeans pocket after Weight Busters.’
‘Go on.’
‘He’s a private detective, evidently.’
‘He always was a nosy bugger,’ Joan interrupted.
‘Anyway, to cut a long story short, he said to call him. I did and we met this morning. He had said it was about you and Charlie junior.’
‘Oh my God, Joan, so he knows! Oh no!’
‘No, wait, he doesn’t know. Get this. He asked me the question and of course I avoided the answer.’
‘I don’t understand, Joan. Why come to you and not me?’
‘He was of the opinion that as you hadn’t told him in over twenty years, why would you suddenly do so now?’
She took a deep breath. ‘And, I hope this doesn’t upset you – but it’s quite sad really. He’s ill, Mo. Said he doesn’t know how long he’s got and is writing his Will. If Charlie is his, he is going to leave him thirty grand!’
‘Oh bless him, that’s awful, Joanie. Oh, how that conniving son of mine could do with the money to get him on his feet. It might even make him sort himself out properly. I mean…thirty thousand pounds!’ She raised her eyebrows. ‘That would be a decent deposit on a house and more.’
‘Yes, it would. But then I started thinking, Mo. Would he really be bothered to lose weight if he was dying? I mean, there’s vain and then there’s vain.’
Mo laughed. ‘Mind you, he always did love himself, even at seventeen. And how on earth did he know that we would be there? Maybe he is a really good private detective.’
‘Mo, he saw us there the first week; it’s not brain science that we would be there the next.’
‘Oh, what am I going to do? If I had never seen him again, then I wouldn’t even have this dilemma. Is thirty thousand pounds really worth the upset? Money is, after all, the root of all evil. Just imagine the scenario of that son of mine knowing the truth. Young Charlie wouldn’t take the news well – about the dad bit, at least; he’d love the fact that free money was coming to him. Charlie would then have great delight in telling Ron. Rosie would then have to go through another massive upheaval and trauma, with shouting and rows and violence; it would just be too terrible for us all.’
‘Mind you, if money was involved young Charlie might keep his mouth shut.’
‘“Might” isn’t good enough. I couldn’t bear the time bomb. And he would still hate me for not telling him in the first place.’
Mo took a slurp of tea.
‘Why didn’t you tell me when you found the card, Joan? I feel a bit miffed about that. And even worse – when I saw you together in Rosco’s, I was mortified. You should have just told me everything.’
‘Oh Mo, I’m sorry. I am so stupid sometimes. I didn’t know how to play it. I thought maybe I could avoid you getting hurt by this man, who is obviously a bit of a charlatan.’
‘Oh Joanie, always tell me. There is nothing else you are forgetting to tell me, now is there?’
Joan thought back to her previous antics with Charlie junior and felt sick.
‘Or course not!’
‘Good. Look at the size of these shoulders: they can take anything, you should know that by now.’
Joan went to the sink and started washing down the kitchen surfaces. She let it go that the kids were running around like elephants upstairs.
‘So, how did you leave it anyway?’ Mo added.
Joan wiped her hands on a tea towel and sat back down.
‘Well, the cheeky bastard said there would be a drink in it for me if I did tell him the truth and that he would be in touch.’
‘What a prat! It makes me glad I didn’t stay with him now. Bloody game-playing. OK, let me sleep on it. What worries me is, is there any other way he can find out if it doesn’t come from me or you?’
The two woman sank into a thoughtful silence.
– Chapter Twenty –
Alana awoke in her own bed to the sound of hushed voices downstairs. She felt a bit groggy and remembered back to Stephen giving her a sleeping tablet as she was just too fraught to settle. She got out of bed, put on her dressing-gown and headed downstairs to the kitchen.
Stephen was on his laptop at her kitchen table. It made her feel warm inside to have him so close to her.
‘Hey, what are you doing up? I was just going to come and see if I could get you anything. How are you feeling?’
‘Sad,’ she said in a childlike voice and burst into tears. He got up and held her to him tightly.
‘Where’s Eliska?’ she asked in a panic. ‘What have you told her?’
‘She’s absolutely fine, Lani. She stayed at young Tommy’s last night. We haven’t told her anything. We wanted to consult you first.’
‘We?’
‘Yes, we.’ Isobel Murray walked in to the kitchen, duster in hand.
‘Mother!’ Then to Stephen: ‘What�
�s she doing here?’
‘Lani, don’t be like that. Stephen was kind enough to call me and tell me what had happened. I’m here to help.’
‘Please don’t be upset with me or your mother. I didn’t know where to turn and thought she should know you were having an operation, and then she just turned up late last night.’
‘OK, but no funny business, Mother, or you can go home.’ Alana didn’t feel she could cope with this latest development right at that moment.
Stephen kissed her on the forehead ‘Look, I have a meeting this morning, so I have to go back into Town. I will call you later, I promise. We have lots to talk about when you are feeling stronger.’
Grabbing his briefcase off the floor, he was gone.
‘Please let me try and care for you, Lani. Just for a few days. I know I’ve been a shit mother, but you need me now and I want to prove I can give you some love back.’
Alana sat down at the table. ‘Eliska has never even met you, but at least she does know you exist. I told her that you were on a big life adventure. She has seen pictures and you have been a subject for one of her “show and tells” at school. Glamorous Granny travels the world and all that. Little did they know, hey? Glamorous Granny too wrapped up in her own one-way love affairs to see the reality of life and accept her out – of-wedlock granddaughter.’
‘Stephen is obviously the father? Just looking at her beautiful photos shows that. Scottish too, can’t believe you didn’t tell me that. Perfect!’
Alana refused to comment. ‘So do you know what time Eliska is back then, do you? Seeing as you seem to know more of what’s going on in my life than I do today.’
‘This Dana seems like such a lovely girl – I suggested to Stephen that he ring her. She offered to have the bairn another night if you’d like that. Said she would pop by after school and pick up any clean clothes she needed.’
‘Yes, Dana is a lovely non-judgmental lady. But no, let’s ring her. I want to see my little lady and it will be really exciting for her to meet her granny.’ She emphasised the word granny.
‘Oh Lani, does she have to call me Granny? Can’t she just call me Isobel?’
‘Just put the kettle on, Mother, and do something bloody useful for once.’
‘So let me get this straight, you are taking the girls and Joshua to PizzaExpress so I can have the house to myself with Robbie if I want to?’
‘If that’s OK with you, Gordon?’
‘Of course it is, but I think we’re going out anyway.’
‘OK, well, I will try and stay out until at least eleven. My friend Martyna – you know, the one who au-pairs on Bramwell Hill, near Dana – says she is home alone with the children so we can go and watch films and eat popcorn round there afterwards if we want to.’
‘Fine, that’s lovely. I know they will have fun with you whatever.’
‘How’s it going with Robbie, anyway?’
‘Yeah, it’s OK. I realise he is a bit of a player but you know me, I’m a heart-on-sleeve boy. I am a bit worried that I am falling for him ever so slightly.’
‘Well, try not to, Gordy. I think as you say he is out for the fun and I would hate to see you get hurt.’
‘Look at you giving me the advice, Miss Marriage Wrecker you. I normally wouldn’t condone it under this roof but just the fact that it’s Preachy’s husband is too bloody hysterical. I can’t abide that woman.’
‘Well, you won’t be seeing him here again, Gordon. I have come to my common senses, is that how you say? He is so boring. I would like a nice new young boyfriend, please. Can you send one by magic?’ She laughed her tinkling laugh and clicked her fingers.
Gordon smiled. ‘Good call, Inga. It can only lead to heartache in the end and better to leave it now when no suspicion has been raised. It can just be your little playground secret and God knows how many of those are lurking around those school gates, eh?’
‘Exactly. It eez a den of iguanas, no?’
Gordon kissed her on the cheek lovingly. ‘Iniquity, I think you mean, my lovely friend. Now, where are those girlies? I need to get them bathed and ready for you to take out.’
At that moment, Lola came rushing in, looking upset. ‘Molly’s head won’t go back on, Daddy.’
‘Oh, sorry Lo, I meant to fix her. Give her to me and I’ll superglue it.’
The kittens were running havoc in the toy box.
‘Kat’s back to her usual tricks, I see, now her paw is better,’ Gordon commented.
‘And Alfie keeps farting,’ Lily added, holding her nose.
‘That’s nice, Did you teach him all he knows?’ Gordon said cheekily, grabbing her and tickling her.
‘So, Daddy do we get to meet Robbie tonight then?’
‘You may do actually – depends what time you go to PizzaExpress.’
‘Good. He has to be as nice as Daddy Chris or Mummy will be cross, remember.’
A lump hit Gordon’s throat at the mention of two people so dear to him.
‘Of course I remember,’ he said huskily, then pulled himself together. Now get undressed the pair of you, the bath’s running.’
The twins were arguing about clothes when the doorbell rang.
‘I don’t want you to wear a red top, I’m wearing a red top,’ Lily screeched.
‘But’s it’s a different design!’ Lola screeched back.
‘And it goes with my glasses too.’
‘Oh, all right. Daddy always gives you what you want. You’re a spoilt little cow.’
‘Oi, ladies! Let me answer the door and when I get back I want you to be friends again, all right?’ He ran to the front door.
‘Evening.’ Gordon opened the door to a smirking Robbie. ‘What you been up to? You look sneaky.’
‘Guilty as charged. I’ll tell you in a minute.’ He then grimaced theatrically as he heard the twins screaming at each other.
‘I thought you’d be used to this in your Bebops world?’ Gordon asked, rather hurt by his attitude.
‘I am, that’s why I like to get away from it in my personal life.’
‘Yeah. I get you,’ Gordon acknowledged, taking in Robbie’s revealing red jeans and tight black T-shirt and suddenly feeling remarkably horny.
‘Here, open this.’ He threw him a beer. ‘I’ll go and sort them out.’ He went into the girls’ bedroom and shut the door behind him. They were both still wearing their red tops. Stalemate.
‘Now, you wanted to meet Robbie, and Robbie is here. He is also wearing red jeans. Obviously, a very trendy colour at the moment. So, why don’t you just stay as you are – you both look beautiful. I get that you want to be individuals and not wear the same and that’s totally cool by me – you know that. But your tops are very different and you have different coloured jeans on, so come on. Inga is going to be ready to leave in ten minutes.’
‘Does he look like Chris then? Your new boyfriend?’ Lola asked.
‘Oh, it’s you. We know you already,’ Lily announced as she paraded into the kitchen.’ You’re Eliska’s manny.’
‘Indeed,’ Robbie replied. ‘Manny, eh? That’s funny.’
‘Not that funny,’ Lola interjected. ‘Anyway, my mummy said you have to be as nice as Chris or you are not allowed to see our daddy again.’
Inga walked into the kitchen and grimaced at Gordon as Lola said this.
‘Oh, did she indeed,’ Robbie said rather stiffly. ‘Well, let’s hope I pass the test then.’
Gordon bit his lip and mouthed, ‘Sorry.’
Inga intervened . ‘Right – come on then you two, we need to leave. Joshua will be waiting.’
‘What do you mean, no?’ Robbie couldn’t understand why Gordon was turning down the line of cocaine he’d prepared on the coffee table whilst Gordon was in the toilet.
‘It’s just not what I’m about, that’s all.’
‘I’d have thought in the airline game, it’s all party, party, party.’
‘Well, it is sometimes, but that doesn’t mean everyone
has to take drugs.’
‘Go on, try it. It’ll make you feel horny. I can guarantee it.’
‘Look, Robbie. I have kids, who will be home later. I am flying in the morning. I can’t.’
‘But you’re happy to get pissed?’
‘I said no, all right?’ Gordon got up and went to the kitchen to get himself another beer. He was no prude but he wasn’t a drug-taker either and never wanted to be.
‘I need a fag,’ Robbie said. ‘Can I have one in here?’
‘No, you’ll have to go outside or lean right out of the bathroom window.’
‘God, you’re really no fun tonight, Daddio.’
‘Come on, let’s get a cab to the station and go into London then. We can party till late.’ Gordon tried his best to appease his now coked-up and super-lively companion.
‘No, let’s just stay here. A party in your pants is just fine.’
Gordon laughed. ‘You’re like a naughty schoolboy.’
‘And ain’t that the attraction,’ Robbie smirked. ‘You know you want it. Who’s Chris anyway?’
‘My longterm ex’
‘What happened?’ Robbie’s Mancunian accent seemed stronger all of a sudden.
‘He couldn’t cope with the kids. No, that’s a lie – he couldn’t cope with the whole family bit, although he loves the girls.’
‘Yeah, can see where he’s coming from. Don’t know how you do it. I can just about tolerate them for my job, but that’s it.’
‘I had no choice but I don’t regret a single day of having them.’ Gordon suddenly thought of his beloved sister.
‘Well, you’re a better man than me. I like my freedom too much to be bogged down with all the baggage and ties that come with kids.’
Gordon looked at a smiling photo of him, Chris and the girls at last year’s trip to Legoland. He had not been able to take it down. ‘Do you know what, Robbie? I want you to leave.’
‘What?’
‘Please leave. It’s not all about sex, is it? We are poles apart. I’m wasting your time. It’s been fun but I can’t do this any more. Sorry.’
‘Come on, Gordon, let’s just have fun tonight then? I’ll get us another beer, eh? We can talk about it.’
