His apartment. His mistress. In clothes he’d bought and paid for.
Stupid. So darn stupid. She’d done the one thing she’d vowed years ago never to do. She’d become her mother—a man’s possession.
She should leave. Forget about her promises. But the one thing Cassie knew was honor. She would honor her promise to Lucas. Not just for him, but for his father.
Then she would leave.
Inside the luxuriously appointed suite, she sank down on the chaise in the salon. Lucas wanted her in his bed, but in the process he’d stripped away the life she’d built for herself as if it didn’t matter. As if she didn’t matter. His world had taken over, and she’d let it happen because she loved him. Okay, so she’d thought she’d been smart and put in rules.
What a joke.
She’d broken those so easily, hypnotized by kisses, telling herself it was because she wanted to make memories.
Wrong…sort of.
It was because she loved him.
Reality hit hard, and she chastised herself for being every inch a fool. She’d given all she could to Lucas, and all it had done was tug so damned hard at her heartstrings, she thought they would break.
Lucas wasn’t hers. Oh, they made love. Beautiful, wonderful, sensual love. He adored her body. He’d even whispered such words in the quiet hours more than once. Then dawn would break in more ways than one.
Lucas Palmera might want her in his bed, but it would never be enough.
By mid-morning, she was all but climbing the walls and wandered aimlessly from room to room. In one of the other bedrooms, she halted in front of the closet where some of the possessions she’d demanded be brought from her home had been stored. She yanked the door open. Boxes were stacked to the ceiling. Tears threatened to fall. Her life had been reduced to a few boxes.
She tugged one out, dropped to the floor and retrieved an album and opened it. The photos of her childhood, visits to her father’s home in New Zealand, and her grandparents at their west coast cottage brought back nostalgic memories. Turning the page, she spied a photo of sweet, innocent Tina. Tina, who had two loving grandparents, and a sister who played a game halfway around the world, and waited for her to come and get her.
She slammed the album closed. The words “giving up” and “compromise” came to mind with a sour taste in her mouth. The truth was, she’d let herself down.
When the doorman buzzed to advise her that Princess Marina was on her way up, Cassie almost dragged Lucas’s beautiful sister in the door, so relieved to have someone to talk to.
“Lucas needs you.” His sister sighed as she accepted the coffee Cassie had quickly made. “You’re perfect for the role of princess.”
This wasn’t good. They were definitely not the words Cassie wanted to hear.
Marina settled back in the leather sofa and crossed her slim legs at the ankle. “You’ll need to be trained in royal protocol, of course.”
Oh God. Lucas had mentioned protocol this morning. She had thought it some sort of ephemeral thing that would go away. “Did Lucas put you up to this?”
“Lord, no.” Marina shifted toward her, resting an elegantly manicured hand on Cassie’s forearm. “Don’t worry about it. It’s a piece of cake. Openings, charity events. You’ll find something you’re passionate about and focus on that.”
Passionate. Focus. She’d already done that, and look where the heck it got her.
At the sound of the phone ringing, Cassie scooped it up, only to wish she hadn’t. Lucas’s media man introduced himself briefly and didn’t waste any time. “The interviewer is due at five. Hair and makeup people will arrive at three.”
“I beg your pardon?”
“Be ready, Ms. Masters. We don’t have time for theatrics.”
Cassie’s mouth opened, but no sound came out and the phone line went dead.
“I guess that was Otto,” Marina said.
Cassie snapped her mouth closed. All she could do was nod.
“Welcome to the life of a princess. Father will be so pleased.”
Oh dear God. The proverbial nail had been securely hammered into her coffin, and she had no way out.
Her days became a blur, and Cassie barely recognized the woman staring back at her in the gold-leafed mirror in her dressing room. The fact that she even needed a dressing room virtually the size of her entire apartment would have thrown her a month ago, but over the last ten days, she had operated on a knife-edge of moment by moment, her life taken over by “them”—the palace guard. They schooled her, scheduled her, told her where to be and who to talk to, ad infinitum.
Nights, though, remained unchanged. They were spent in Lucas’s arms, only to wake to a cold bed each morning with Lucas already gone from her side.
Today had been the civil service for Lucas’s father and his new bride. Tonight, they were attending a grand gala in honor of the newlyweds, and though this was a very special occasion, they had all begun to feel the same. She felt lost and alone.
Draped in the finest couture, Cassie found it hard to visualize who she was anymore. Most women would have been thrilled to wear such exquisite clothes. Not her. Her gaze traveled the length of the beautiful gown, observing the way it fell to her feet with only the tips of her bead-encrusted shoes peeking beneath the midnight-blue silk. A beautiful gown, yes, and she looked beautiful in it, but there was no joy in wearing such beauty, only sadness. She seemed to have vanished completely.
Her hands dropped to her sides. She couldn’t even allow herself to cry anymore. How sad. How real.
A brush of dark cloth caught her attention. She looked away from her image. Lucas leaned against the doorjamb. “Ready?”
In a heartbeat, Cassie took in the fine cut of the tuxedo clothing his perfect body. He took her breath away. Still.
Memories teased. Being wrapped in his arms and hugged to the curve of him; whispered words in the quiet of the night; and then she remembered waking up to a cold bed, the realization cauterizing her heart as it did each morning.
This was fake. Temporary. But sadly, her love was not fake.
Bit by bit, Lucas was destroying her soul and he probably didn’t even know it. She knew she should walk away now. Walking away would mean the end of dreams that in reality had no hope of fruition anyway. So why wait another day?
She wouldn’t. That day, she realized, had arrived.
“You’re not wearing them?” Lucas asked.
Guilt cast its shadow across her conscience, and her gaze switched to the black velvet box holding the sapphire necklace on her dressing table, then back to Lucas. “I thought I’d save them for another time.” There won’t be another time.
He paced the few steps to the mirrored dressing table, scooped up the jewelry box and snapped the lid back. “Do you know that the sapphires match your eyes?”
She tried to smile, and failed.
“One of my rules was no jewelry.”
Lucas drew the tip of his thumb down the curve of her cheek, his potent gaze holding hers. “You also said no sex. I know you said no jewelry, Cassie. But…I wanted to give these to you. Beautiful jewels for a beautiful woman.”
“Oh, Lucas.” Cassie exhaled a soft sigh. Why did she have to love him? Hoist on her own petard, she swallowed back her desperation. “They’re too much and too expensive. They could get lost.”
“We’ll have bodyguards, and an extra one to guard your jewels. You need to wear them, Cassie. They’re part of…”
A cold, hard bitterness circled her heart. “The act, and like a good girl, I’ve got to do what I’m told.”
A muscle in his cheek twitched ever so slightly. “So why are you not wearing them?” He withdrew the glittering necklace from its luxurious silken resting place. “Turn around, Cassie.”
Mute, she turned her back to him, aware of his closeness, feeling the brush
of his fingers on her collarbone as he positioned the necklace.
Gold digger. You are your mother. Giving in. Accepting.
She squeezed her eyes closed. What was wrong with her? Most women would kill for something so beautiful.
But she didn’t want his jewels—just his love.
He rested his hands briefly on her shoulders and then turned her back to face him. “A perfect match.”
The sapphires chilled her skin, imitating the ice in her veins.
Lucas leaned toward her, and Cassie knew he was going to kiss her. She lived for these moments, but tonight, branded by the jewels, by the gold of a man who would never love her, she couldn’t help but feel so very, very sad. She had let herself down. Again.
And that had to change. Lucas had achieved what he wanted…and she had made her decision. Tonight was the beginning of the end.
Chapter Twelve
Lucas drew back, his gaze fixed solely on the jewels glittering at her throat. “They suit you.”
“Yes. Cartier,” she acknowledged, numb fingers grazing the stones. “I know them well.”
A moment of confusion crossed his face, then clarity hit. “Ah…” He dragged a hand through his hair. “Those jewelers.” They both knew she used Cartier to “buy off” his ex-girlfriends. “Are you ready?”
“As I’ll ever be.” Knowing she was about to be displayed again, she reached for her clutch bag and hugged it to her as Lucas draped her evening cape around her shoulders. A frisson of ice inched down her spine, but that was nothing compared to the scorching heat his fingertips elicited as they grazed across her bare shoulders. Instinctively, she arched back and rested her head against his muscled chest.
“Did I tell you how beautiful you look? The perfect princess.”
Cassie spun from his hold. “Let’s get this show on the road. You want to get your money’s worth out of these jewels.”
Within the blink of his heavy lashes, the hypnotic warmth in his expression evaporated, replaced by a chilling hardness. “Of course.”
Cassie watched him walk away, imagined it was the moment he walked from her forever, and her heart shattered all over again. She was lost.
Lucas didn’t bother with the limousine but drove them to the hotel situated high on the southern cliffs of the lake. As they passed over the ancient Roman concourse that led to the converted monastery, he shot her a questioning look. “You’re quiet.”
“What’s there to say?”
His brows knitted, and once again guilt snapped at her conscience. “We’re lying to your family, Lucas. It’s not right.”
He reached for her hand and wrapped her fingers in his warmth. She tried to tug free, but he held her firm.
“That didn’t worry you a few weeks ago. Besides, they all believe it.”
“Except we know the truth.”
Lucas released her hand, using both on the steering wheel as he maneuvered the final switch back up the steep mountain. “It’ll be over soon.”
“Then what?”
“Then we go home. Then I can make love to you.” His brows rose, wiggling good-humoredly.
Cassie squeezed her eyes closed. She was talking about the end of their farce. He meant the evening.
When the car drew to a halt outside the Xavier Hotel, the doorman opened her door, saluted Lucas and in turn bowed to her. She had arrived. Royal—almost.
As the melee of foreign dignitaries and their wives surrounded them, Cassie did her best. She smiled and made polite conversation. Every now and then, she caught Lucas looking at her and witnessed the desire in his eyes. Her body reacted, nipples hardening beneath her silk dress. The man could undress her with one look, and from the tiny pulse throbbing in his throat, just above the pure white of his shirt collar, he knew it too.
The evening progressed, and Cassie found it increasingly hard to contain her composure. All around her, voices rose and ebbed, while a sharp pain stabbed at the base of her skull. Exhausted from the constant scrutiny, she slid her chair back as discreetly as possible and rose on unsteady feet.
Lucas shot her a frown. “Cassie?”
She fingered the jewels at her throat. They felt deathly cold, but it was that same chilling reality that would help her walk away without looking back. “I’m going for some fresh air,” she said quickly, recognizing all eyes had switched to her.
Needing the respite of silence, she spun from their inspection and wove her way through the dining room, aware of whispered words following her.
“His latest.”
“Wonder when he’ll tire of her?”
A welcoming breeze wafted up from the turbulent waves below the cliff as she walked outside. She exhaled a relieved breath and sequestered herself in a dimly lit corner of the patio.
“Cassie, darling.”
“Oh dear God, not now.” Cassie came face-to-face with the one person she really wasn’t up to dealing with tonight. Her mother.
Blanche’s face barely cracked a smile. “Who would have thought that my ugly little duckling could turn into a swan? You are really rather beautiful, darling.”
“They’re only clothes, Mother.”
“Oh yes, but such stunning clothes. The finest. And jewels.” Her mother’s eyes glistened as she focused on the sapphires at Cassie’s throat. “They say that clothes make the man…or woman,” she said with a sycophantic smile as she preened, a bejeweled hand gliding down the curve of her own gown. “I don’t know why you didn’t try to make better of yourself years ago.”
“Because I didn’t want to attract men who only thought beauty was what they could buy me. I didn’t want that shallowness in my life. I wanted to be loved for who I am, not whether I’m beautiful or ugly, or decked out in jewels and designer gowns. I want…” Oh, what was the use trying to explain.
But her mother’s attention remained fixated on the sparkling sapphires. “So exquisite.” She reached across and caressed them. “You’ve played your cards right with the prince. Perhaps you take after your mother after all.”
Bile etched a path up Cassie’s throat and soured her mouth.
“May I?” Without waiting for Cassie’s response, Blanche unclipped the heavy jewels and gave a squeal of delight as she adjusted them around her own throat. “They must be worth thousands.”
“Millions,” Cassie quipped with a tight smile.
Her mother’s gaze glittered as bright as the sapphires. “Of course, husband number two gave me diamonds, but nothing as exquisite as these. You’ve done a good job.”
“Mother! Why do you always think of things in terms of money, or what your beauty can get you?”
“It works for me.”
“And yet you’re always chasing the next man. Tell me how that’s made you happy?”
Her mother shook her head. The over-sprayed and processed hairdo never moved an inch. “Men don’t last, Cassie, but these…” She stroked the necklace. “Jewels last. They get you through the bad times.”
Dear God, her mother had truly sold herself. “I don’t want to be bought.”
“What do you call this necklace, then?”
“It’s not mine. Lucas wanted me to wear them.”
“To show you off. You’re his arm candy. He’s displaying his purchase. You.”
Instant denial sprang to her lips. “He’s not. I’m not.” She didn’t want to believe it. Or hear it. But she knew the truth in those words.
“Are you so certain? He’s bought you new clothes, these adorable sapphires, and I hear you’ve moved into his home.”
All true.
“Someone whispered you’ve given up your job.”
“That’s not quite accurate.”
Blanche’s over-Botoxed brows arched as best they could. “So how true is it?”
“Lucas has a temp in for the moment while I learn ro
yal protocol.”
“And here I was thinking you were a career woman.”
“I was—am.”
“But Lucas says don’t come to work, and you give in.”
Oh God. “How do you do it, Mother? You chase men for what they can give you.”
Blanche’s fingertips slipped from the sapphires and she smiled as best as her plastic surgery allowed. “Such is the innocence of youth.”
“Don’t patronize me. I’m no innocent.”
“No, you’re not. But then you, my darling, will only marry a man for love. Love, I hope you will never find out, can be a cold bed partner.”
“I don’t understand.”
“No, you probably don’t, but then you’ve never wanted for anything. I made sure of that.”
“Money! I never wanted money, or things. I wanted you.”
“But that was the only way I could give you me.”
“What? You’re not making any sense.”
“I suppose not. It’s something long forgotten. At least I try to forget. I married your father when I was eighteen. We were in love, young and carefree. He would crew on various yachts, and I would cook.”
“Cook? You?”
Her mother’s mouth curved into a tiny smile. “Yes, me. Don’t be surprised. The woman I am today is not the woman I was.”
Cassie heard the tinge of sadness in her mother’s voice. It surprised her. Blanche was vivacious, the life and soul of the party. Never sad or remorseful.
“We traveled for several years, and then you came along. It was fun. We were a family, but then things got tough. Your father was away for long periods of time, leaving you and me behind. He was ‘having fun’ on yachts in glamorous places graced by the rich and famous, while I was struggling to make ends meet. Then I met a man. He was rich. Powerful.”
“Antony Parker,” Cassie interrupted, remembering the man who came fleetingly into her life.
“Yes.”
The Bachelor Prince Page 14
