“Uh…” was all I could manage. Then I shook my head and looked at Eunomia. “Did you know about this?”
“I suspected. But since there was never any talk of Tisiphone having a child, I thought there must be another explanation.”
“You didn’t think to say something to me?” I said, exasperated.
She looked at me, cocked her head to the side. “What would I have said?”
I sighed, shook my head. I didn’t doubt what Tisiphone had said. I could feel that she spoke the truth the way I could feel the ground beneath my feet and the cool night air around us.
“I will leave you now. Duty calls,” Eunomia said, and she blinked out of sight.
The Fury and I stood there for a while. “Come sit with me,” she said after a while, and I did, pulling Brennan along with me and plopping down on the ground next to her.
We watched each other for several long moments. “So I’m not human. I knew that already. But I’m not a demon, either,” I said.
She looked thoughtful. “I think ‘demon’ is too small a word. Demons are of the Nether. We, Furies, are of the Nether, as are the Guardians and several other supernatural beings. So there are definite similarities to the way our power feels, the way it reacts to other beings of the Nether. We are very alike in many ways. You thought you were a demon?”
“Well, I sure the hell didn’t think I was the child of a goddess,” I muttered. Then something came to me. “Am I immortal?”
She smiled a little. “No. Me leaving you here was basically the same as banishing you from our realm. When that happens, we lose our immortality. You will be very hard to kill, and you’ll have an exceptionally long life compared to humans and even demons, but, eventually, you will die.”
“So, what? You didn’t want me?” I looked down, hating how much the answer meant to me. Brennan squeezed my hand again.
Tisiphone took my other hand in hers. Her skin was cool, like Eunomia’s, like demons’, and, I realized for the first time, like mine.
“Beautiful girl. I wanted you. I have missed you every day since I gave you up. You were loved. You always have been.”
I kept my eyes on the floor, unable to look at this magical being who claimed to be my mother. “Then, why?”
“You know what Furies do, yes?”
“Deliver justice.”
“Yes. To mortals and immortals. We are the only ones with the power and authority to punish a god.” She paused, and I sensed worry from her. She seemed to be thinking, coming to a decision about something. “The Furies have always been maidens. We do not take lovers. We do not have children. It is just the way of things, and with good reason. The unthinkable happened, though. I have been in love with a god for eons, and he with me. When I finally gave myself to him, finally surrendered myself, you were the result.”
I looked up at her. “My father is?”
She hesitated, then smiled, the small, shy smile of a woman in love. Universal. “Cithaeron. A mountain god.”
I thought for a minute, trying to remember the mythology I’d picked up since meeting Eunomia. I narrowed my eyes. “Uh. Isn’t the story that you killed him?”
She nodded. “That is the story. Your father is very much alive and well. My sisters and I spread that story, kind of a cautionary tale.”
“And the point of the tale is?” I asked.
She looked at me, and her eyes blazed. “That no one, not even those beloved to us, escapes the wrath of a Fury.”
My heart pounded in response to her words. Pride; feral, wild pride coursed through me, and we looked at each other, and she smiled. She knew exactly what I was feeling.
I tried to get myself focused again. Shook my head. “Okay. So why leave me here?”
“As I said. The Furies are the only beings with the power to punish a god. Sometimes, they need correction, and that is our job, when the rest of the gods deem it necessary.” I nodded, urging her to go on. She took a breath, looked at me intently. “The unthinkable, an abomination, the child of a Fury and a god, is the only being truly capable of deicide,” she said softly, her voice barely a whisper. I sensed something from her, a mix of guilt, fear. Her face was calm, but I had a feeling there was more to the story.
Not that I needed any more surprises, mind you.
I sat, stunned. I stared at her, felt concern, sadness from Brennan beside me. “So, what? I was too dangerous to keep around?” I asked, angry, irritated for myself, mourning for the helpless little girl I’d been. Unloved, turned away.
She felt it, and she held my hand tighter, pulled me into her arms and hugged me, and I let go of Brennan and awkwardly put my arms around her. She was strong, solid, under the tailored black pants and shirt she wore. “No! Never that. I would have kept you, raised you among the gods. Never that.” She hugged me tightly. “It was what other gods would have done to you,” she said.
“They would have feared you. And they would have used you, a weapon against their rivals, a way to gain power. You never would have been at peace. I could not let that happen to you. They would have either wanted you banished and then killed, or controlled. The might of my sisters and I is nothing against the rest of the pantheon. We would have had nothing but never-ending war and strife. I wanted something better for you,” she whispered in my ear.
She released me, and I sat back, still watching her. She glanced back at the gate. “I have to leave soon,” she said, and I could sense the disappointment in her.
“You’ll come back soon?” I asked her.
She smiled. “I will do my best. I don’t get to this realm much. If I start coming often, it will raise suspicions.”
“Someone already knows I’m here,” I said. “Eunomia suspected this already.”
She nodded, and her expression hardened. “Yes, she mentioned her theory to me, but her theory was about a female demon, and I wrote it off as nonsense. This explains why they’re so focused on breaking through. Not to get out. This has always been too organized than to have just been an uprising. Someone there knows about you, and wants to use you.”
“I won’t be used,” I said.
She smiled. “That’s my girl. For now, we will keep our knowledge of each other to ourselves, at least until we have an idea of who it is that is so focused on getting to you.” Then she paused. “When I left you here, I put enchantments on you so no one would know what you were. You would be human, and everyone, including yourself, would have no reason to suspect otherwise. By hiding your true nature, I hoped to keep you safe. How is it that the enchantments have been broken?”
I shook my head. “How much time do you have?”
“Give me the abbreviated version,” she said, smiling.
So I did. I told her about my powers manifesting. About Nain. About Nain’s death. About explosions and fires and gunshots and every other way I hadn’t been killed. I told her about my dream after the explosion. By the end, tears ran down her cheeks, and she pulled me into another fierce hug.
“I am so sorry, my love,” she whispered, kissing the top of my head, the way I’d always imagined a mom would. I cried, too, in my mother’s arms, knowing things would only get crazier from here on out.
She backed up, held my face in her hands. “We will find a way to end this before anyone else is lost to you. We will make those who have harmed you pay, and dearly. I promise you.”
I nodded. “I will enjoy making them pay.”
She grinned, and it was deadly. “As will I. I really do have to go now. We will talk again soon. I love you, Mollis.”
“Mollis, huh? Here, they call me Molly,” I said, holding her hand.
She shook her head. “The mortals are often more perceptive than we give them credit for.” We hugged, and she took another long look at me, and smiled, and she spread her wings and flew back through the gateway.
I stood there, wondering if it was real, and then I turned to Brennan and the look on his face told me all I needed to know.
“So…I’m
a fucking god?” I said.
He shrugged. “I always told you you didn’t really feel like a demon.”
“Know-it-all,” I muttered, and he took my hand, and we stood there, guarding the gate, protecting the world against the monsters trying to break through because of me.
♦ ♦ ♦
Finally, after another night in the factory (thankfully, with Brennan by my side, which made a world of difference) Eunomia came through and told us they’d beaten back the raging horde and they had not only Tisiphone, but also a couple of other gods using their powers to keep the gateway closed.
So we were able to go back to our normal life, except that there was nothing normal about it, and even if there was, nothing was the same anymore. At least, not for me. I made Brennan promise not to tell Ada and Stone about the Fury thing. They already acted a little funny around me since that whole regenerate-half-my-body-after-an-explosion thing, and I just didn’t want any more weirdness.
Brennan’s cold, or whatever it was, was getting worse, and I’d ordered him to bed. He kept trying to play it off, but I had a bad feeling it was more than a cold. The doctor I’d called in on behalf of the Grosse Pointe shifters was still in town, because whatever the matron of the pack had was spreading through the pack now, and we had them under quarantine. Over half of them, and now the doctor himself, were sick. Whatever it was, it was only affecting the shifters, and everyone I asked, including Ada who had some skill in healing, said they’d never seen anything quite like it before.
I couldn’t stop thinking.
My parents were gods. I was an abomination, even among gods. People were dead because of me, because some god, or gods, had a stick up their ass about my existence. Veronica. George. Nain. Who knew how many innocents. All dead because of me.
I spent the first day back home trying to catch up on everything. Phone calls. Emergency meetings. And there were three turf war situations (shifters and weres) that I refused to let my team handle, and I went out that first night and handled all three situations, and I came home bloody and angry and feeling wrong in my own skin.
And when I got home, I found Shanti in the kitchen, scrubbing at her eyes, trying to pretend she hadn’t just been crying. I could feel the sadness, frustration, anger coming from her. I walked up to her, forgetting about my bloody clothing.
“Hey,” I said. “What’s wrong?”
She shook her head, waved it off.
“Shanti,” I said, and was immediately over-run by more guilt. I’d brought her in, and pretty much ignored her. “I’m here. Do you need to talk?”
She shook her head again. “It’s stupid.”
“The things that upset us are rarely stupid,” I said. “Tell me.”
She sighed. “It’s my birthday. I’m seventeen.”
I watched her. “Happy birthday, kiddo. I’m sorry I didn’t know it was today.”
“It’s okay. It’s not even that, really. It’s knowing that I’m eighteen, and birthdays really don’t mean a thing anymore because I’ll always look like this,” she said in disgust, looking down at herself. “I’ll always look sixteen. I’ll never have so many of the things I thought I would. I’ll never have a big white wedding out in the sunshine. I’ll never have a child growing inside of me. I’ll never be any goddamn thing other than what I am right now,” she said, and tears started rolling down her face again. I pulled her into my arms, and she cried against my shoulder, great, wracking sobs that tore my heart in two. I felt tears sting my eyes, too. She started talking again. “I am going crazy here. I appreciate you giving me a home, but I’m going nuts. I haven’t left the loft since you took me in.”
“I know. I’m sorry. First we were focused on getting the bloodlust under control, and then things just got…”
“Crazy,” she said.
“Crazy,” I agreed, letting her go and stepping back. Then I smiled at her. “Well. It’s your birthday, right? We should go out.”
She stared at me. “Are you serious?”
“Yeah. It’s night time. It’s your birthday. I just need to get cleaned up and then we can go out to eat if you want.”
“Oh, hell yes,” she said, laughing. “Can we hit Slows?”
I nodded. “Sure. Just give me a few minutes.”
I went to my room. Showered and dressed, found my darkest sunglasses, and shoved my car keys and money into my pockets. Then I went up to Brennan’s room, knocked gently. He didn’t answer, and I let myself in.
He was sleeping deeply, and I didn’t like the way his breath wheezed. I put my hand on his forehead. He was hot, and clammy, and it made me even more worried. He stirred, and looked up at me.
“Molly? What’s going on?” he asked, starting to sit up.
“Nothing. It’s okay,” I said, gently pushing him back down. “I was just checking on you. How are you feeling?”
“Like crap. Chest hurts,” he said, settling back down. “It’s okay,” he said when he saw my face. “I’ll be fine. Stop worrying.”
“I can’t.”
“I know,” he said, smiling a little.
“It’s Shanti’s birthday,” I said, pulling his covers back up and straightening them.
“Oh, shit,” he groaned. “I forgot.”
“It’s okay. Things have been nuts. I’m going to take her out to dinner. She needs to get out of here for a while.”
“Be careful,” he said.
“You know me,” I joked.
“Exactly.”
“We’re going to Slows. Want me to bring you back anything?”
He shook his head.
“You love Slows,” I said, worry knotting my stomach.
“I can’t eat it, Molly. It’ll just go to waste.” Then he looked up at me. “Stop worrying,” he repeated.
“Right.” I smoothed his blankets, feeling more helpless than I’d felt in forever. I hadn’t told him about the Grosse Pointe shifters. The quarantine. The doctor. “We’ll be back soon.”
“Have fun,” he said, closing his eyes again. I left his room, closed the door behind me, tried to keep the worry off of my face so I could at least give Shanti a nice birthday dinner out.
Shanti and I left and drove to the restaurant. She looked out the car windows like a tourist, like someone seeing the city for the very first time. Dahael and Bashiok sat in the back seat, and we had AC/DC on the radio. We passed a tattoo parlor, and I noticed Shanti staring at it with interest.
“Can vampires get tattoos?” she asked.
I shrugged. “Sure. I’ve met a few that have them. I think the key is making sure there’s no one else getting tattooed at the time. Blood, you know,” I said, and she nodded.
“Yeah, that could be tempting.” She paused. “You have one, right?”
I nodded.
“How does a chick with a healing ability have a tattoo? Wouldn’t it just disappear?”
“The trick was keeping myself from healing while the tattooist was working. Once the ink was in, it was in,” I said.
“Hm.”
“Why? Do you want one?” I asked.
“Maybe,” she said, looking out the window again. We arrived at the restaurant, and ordered, and stuffed ourselves like absolute pigs on ribs and macaroni and cheese and cobbler. I watched her as she studied the people around us. She tried not to watch a young couple snuggling in the booth across from us, but her eyes kept darting that way, and I could feel longing, sadness coming from her.
“Hey,” I said, nudging her leg with my foot under the table. “That’s not impossible for you, you know.”
“Right. Because people are just lining up to date someone who can kill them.”
“Vampires are hot,” I said quietly, smiling. “And you’re an amazing, smart, beautiful young woman. I don’t think you’ll have any trouble finding someone to love you.”
“And if I do? And he doesn’t stay? If he realizes it’s just too crazy being with someone like me?” she asked.
“You cry. And you mourn a
little. And you are grateful for the memories you made,” I said softly. “You realize that what you had was worth the pain.”
She was watching me. “I’m sorry, Molly.”
I shook my head. “It’s okay. There’s no reason to be. There’s one thing I can give advice about,” I said, laughing a little. “Don’t be afraid to love, on the off chance that there might be pain.”
“You mean, don’t do what you’re doing with Brennan?” she asked, quirking her eyebrow at me.
“That’s different. I am still messed up over Nain. I can’t give Brennan what he deserves. And he understands that.”
“Right. Except that you actually very obviously love Brennan, even if you still love and miss your husband, and anyone who spends more than five seconds with the two of you knows how disgustingly perfect you are together.”
I frowned, couldn’t quite look her in the eye. “It’s complicated.”
“You two are complete idiots,” she said. “If this is what love does, maybe I’m not in such a hurry after all,” she said, shaking her head. I handed the waitress the money for our meal, and Shanti stood up and stretched. “I think I want a tattoo. Can we go?”
I sighed. “Sure. Happy birthday, you insufferable little brat.” She laughed, and we headed back to the tattoo parlor we’d seen on the way over. I handed her a flask of blood I’d brought with me, and she guzzled it in the car before we went in.
I used a tiny bit of mental persuasion, and the two waiting customers decided to leave. We watched as the tattooist finished with his current customer.
“What are you getting?” I asked as she watched the process.
“A cross. On my wrist, I think,” she said.
“Nice.” I remembered the way she’d prayed when I found her what seemed like a lifetime ago, the way she’d said she believed that God sent me to her.
“You should get one too,” she said.
“Not this time,” I said.
I held Shanti’s hand as the artist created an ornate cross on her left wrist. She hissed at first in pain, but she was all right after a while.
We drove home, and I was relieved that she seemed much more content than when we’d left. We went into the loft, and Shanti hugged me before heading up to her room.
Broken: Hidden Book Two Page 10
