by K M Leach
Worth the Risk
A Lesbian Romance
By
K M Leach
Copyright © 2015 K M Leach
All rights reserved.
No part of this publication may be reproduced, transmitted in any form or by any means without permission from the author and publisher. This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents within are the products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to persons, living or dead, or events is entirely coincidental.
ISBN-10: 151527666X
ISBN-13: 978-1515276661
Cover design and concept by Rafi.
rafidesousa.tumblr.com
DEDICATION
This book is dedicated to each and every person who has supported my efforts in storytelling from the very beginning and encouraged my growth and raised my confidence to be brave enough to publish my work. I am forever grateful to every single one of my cheerleaders for which this would not have become reality without their pep talks and encouragement.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
I wish to personally thank several individuals that have kept me going in my writing through health issues and in times of inspirational dry spells or lack of motivation.
To Mary, Beth, Heather and Cheryl, who have always had a kind word of support and encouragement for me, or a kick in the ass when I needed it.
To my family for not minding when I lock myself in my room for hours on end while I wrote this story and others and for their belief in me.
And last but not least to Rafi, whose wonderfully brilliant and bright light always made me feel special and believed in, even in my darkest moments when I considered giving away writing altogether. I would also like to thank her for using her remarkable talent to create the cover for this book and hopefully many more covers to come.
CHAPTER ONE
"I'll just grab us some more drinks. I'll be right back," Lucy said, giving her friend Bonnie's leg a squeeze before sliding out of the booth and heading towards the bar. She had hoped that it would be just her and Bonnie tonight, but the brunette had brought her on again, off again boyfriend. She had wanted to go over the final preparations for their yearly getaway to her cabin. She had been friends with Bonnie going on three years now. Lucy had always felt a very strong connection to the brunette from the moment they met and that bond had only grown stronger as the years went by. While knowing that there was a certain amount of sexual attraction on her part towards Bonnie she had never paid too much attention to it before because she had been in a relationship with Nadine and Bonnie was always with or attracted to someone else.
That attraction had remained innocuous and dormant until her and Nadine had gone their separate ways about four months ago and then it had hit her like a ten tonne truck. Lucy looked over her shoulder to watch Bonnie while she waited at the crowded bar for service. "Sexy as hell," Lucy murmured to herself as her eyes took in the stunning woman sitting across from Ryan. Bonnie was smoking hot in her tight leather pants and camisole top that showed off her cleavage. Lucy licked her lips as she imagined running her hands over Bonnie's lean, yet curvaceous form. She watched as Bonnie looked up from pulling at her beer label to scowl at Ryan and whatever idiotic thing he was saying to her. Lucy could imagine the intensity in Bonnie's dark brown eyes and the parting of her full red lips. It was almost painful to be around Bonnie and not touch her. She often found herself staring at those lips and imagining what it would be like to kiss them and what Bonnie would taste like as she returned the kiss, her tongue invading Lucy's mouth. Lucy suppressed a moan as she got lost in her fantasy, a touch on her hand brought her back to reality with a start. "What'll it be, Love?" the bartender asked. She gave him her order and watched him walk away to fill it.
Lucy turned to look over at Bonnie once more and saw that she was still frowning at whatever Ryan was saying. She didn't understand what Bonnie saw in the clown sitting across from her. He was like a sixteen year old boy trapped in a man's body. She wasn't able to take anything he said seriously, but by the looks of it, Bonnie was taking whatever he was saying to her very seriously indeed......
Ryan watched as Bonnie's breath hitched moments before Lucy slid from her place beside the brunette and exclaimed that she was getting more drinks. He watched as Bonnie continued to watch the blonde as she made her way towards the bar. Every time he was out with the two women he felt as if he was intruding and the fact that Bonnie pretty much ignored him whenever she was with Lucy only solidified that feeling. He saw what he thought may have been longing in his lover's face before it changed into a look of resignation and she looked at the table and started picking at the label of her empty beer bottle. He wasn't prepared to ignore it anymore because he was falling for Bonnie and he felt her slipping away. He needed to stake his claim now before he lost her, though he thought that maybe he already had and Bonnie just hadn't realised that she was in love with the blonde at the bar yet.
Either way he was about to find out. He knew that he always came across as aloof and shallow, but he did have feelings, he just hid them behind jokes and sexual innuendo. Not wanting to disappoint everyone's opinion of him that is exactly how he decided to play his game to find out where Bonnie's feelings lay towards him and their relationship. He had been trying for several months to concrete his relationship with the brunette, but she seemed to laugh off his comments or ignored them altogether.
She's been different since Lucy broke up with Nadine and you know it! You already have your answer, but you are too lovesick and whipped by Bonnie to accept it, his inner voice told him.
Bonnie's head snapped up in surprise when she heard his voice.
Jesus, she really had forgotten that I was even here. Why the hell did she invite me in the first place!
"Why is it whenever I see you and Lucy together, I feel like asking if she wants to come home with us?"
Bonnie's face was unreadable as a swirl of conflicting emotions seemed to cross her face at the same time until her face registered only agitation. "You wish! How long have you been holding onto that little fantasy, huh? You are such a pig! You know that? Lucy has no interest in men at all! That's what being a lesbian means. What is it with men and lesbians!"
"Two women together is..... Hot! But you are missing my point, Bonnie."
"There was meaning in that ridiculous comment? Oh, please share it with the clueless and hurry up before Lucy gets back."
"I'm not asking because you two are very sexy and attractive women, which you are. It is the sexual tension that seems to get more and more intense every time I see you two together. I think it is your fantasy to take Lucy home and take her to bed. Not mine! You are meant to be my girlfriend, Bonnie, not hers! Were you just waiting for her relationship with Nadine to self destruct so that you could get your chance or have you two been intimate before?"
"Don't be ridiculous," Bonnie managed to splutter out. He had taken her completely by surprise, that much was obvious, as she tried to hide the fact that she did indeed harbour feelings that were more than just regular 'friend type feelings'.
"This trip you take every year?"
"What about it?"
"Is it some sort of opportunity to get away and fuck unbeknownst to whomever you are dating at the time. Did Nadine find out about you two? Hmm?"
"You are unbelievable. I can't believe you just said that! We just go away to Lucy's cabin for a week. We hike, do some rock climbing, swim in the lake. We don't...... What is your problem?"
"I don't want you to go tomorrow. I want you to come away with me instead. You've been distant and I feel like you're slipping away from me. Y
ou are in a relationship with me and I want you to start acting like it, God damn it."
"Since when did this become a relationship? This was just a bit of fun. You said that yourself and I was happy with that because I didn't want anything serious. We are not exclusive, Ryan. We are friends with benefits at best and I am certainly not going to cancel a trip with my best friend just because you have decided that you want something more serious and you are jealous and worried about my relationship with Lucy!"
"So we don't have a relationship, but you are more than happy to declare that you have one with your best friend Lucy over there, who just so happens to also be a lesbian. I feel like I need to drop a bucket of ice water on you with the way you two look at each other sometimes. Do you have any idea how it makes me feel? I love you, Bonnie."
His heart dropped when his declaration did nothing to change the anger that was growing by the second in the brunette, her eyes were blazing. "So if Lucy was straight you wouldn't have a problem with us going away together? This is ridiculous!"
Ryan slammed down his remaining shot of tequila relishing the way it heated his throat as it went down. He pounded his fist on the table as he put the empty glass down. "You know what's ridiculous? The fact that I just told you that I loved you and you didn't even acknowledge it. You don't care about me at all, do you? I was just something to ride until you found something better. Well, there she is, Bonnie. Coming back from the bar with our drinks. That's what you want, isn't it? And now that Nadine's gone there is nothing standing in your way. You are a user, Bonnie Thompson, who doesn't care who she hurts as long as she is satisfied. I was stupid enough to believe that we may have had a chance for more. I just hope you don't do the same with her... that you don't make her love you and then get bored of her and move onto someone else," he said as he gave her one last look before sliding out of the booth and exited the bar with a bang of the door.
Bonnie was shell shocked by Ryan's outburst, but she was also reeling with the fact that he had been right on a lot of things....
"Everything all right, Bonnie?"
Bonnie looked up to see Lucy's caring concern. She nodded as she fought the urge to cry. "I... uh... yeah. I need to go to the bathroom. I'll be back in a moment and we can finish making our plans for the trip."
Bonnie saw the questions in Lucy's eyes and she knew that the blonde wanted to know what had just happened, but she didn't think she would be able to without bursting into tears. She needed a moment to gather her thoughts and her composure which Ryan had just shredded with his truths. She gave Lucy a halfhearted smile before rushing off to the bathroom.
CHAPTER TWO
Bonnie leaned against the sink and took several deep breaths. She could feel the eyes of the three women who had been chatting amicably when she had burst into the bathroom disrupting their conversation. She turned on the faucet and splashed some cold water on her face. She gave her gawkers a hard stare through the mirror. She heard one of them whisper 'what's her problem' and another say 'bitch' as they exited the bathroom. She grabbed a handful of paper towel and pressed it against her face.
Ryan had surprised her with his hard truths. She hadn't thought that he was particularly observant, let alone had the balls to come out and say all of the things he just said. He had been easy and uncomplicated, just like all the other distractions that she had had over the years. Bonnie had been in love with Lucy for a long time. She wasn't sure when the transition between platonic love and the desperate, romantic love that she felt now had occurred, but it was growing exponentially and it wasn't going away.
Lucy was already in a relationship with Nadine when they had met and Bonnie hadn't shared her growing feelings for the blonde because Lucy was happy with Nadine and she didn't want to be selfish and destroy a solid relationship just because she wanted more. There had also been the fear that declaring her feelings and Lucy not returning them, would have destroyed their amazing friendship that she knew she couldn't live without.
So Bonnie had done the only thing she could, she buried her feelings and spent her time flitting from one meaningless relationship to another. They provided her with the physical release while Lucy provided her with the emotional love and support through their friendship. Things had been manageable until things had started to deteriorate between Lucy and Nadine. Bonnie stuffed her feelings in a box as she tried to console Lucy as she told her about her problems with her girlfriend.
Nadine was a photojournalist and often had to go away for weeks at a time. Bonnie watched as Nadine's career started taking a front seat and Lucy became an afterthought. Lucy would often cry herself to sleep in her lap after having Nadine refusing to take a break in her work projects to just spend time with her. Lucy often went with Nadine on the short trips just so they could spend more than a few days together a month.
Bonnie's heart broke at the pain Lucy was going through with Nadine's continued absence. They had been together for five years and Lucy was determined to fight tooth and nail for her relationship. Bonnie had begun to get angry, not just at Nadine for how she was treating her best friend, but at Lucy herself for not realising that she deserved so much more.
On an occasion when Nadine's work took her away for a several month stint Bonnie had been awakened in the middle of the night by a sobbing Lucy. Bonnie had headed straight to her friend's side and she had held her as she cried and when Lucy pleaded with her to stay she couldn't refuse. She slid into the bed beside the woman she loved with all her heart, even as her heart was breaking with the knowledge that Lucy wished that she was Nadine.
When Lucy had moved against her back and slipped her arm innocently around Bonnie's waist and spooned her seeking comfort from her loneliness, Bonnie had tensed up at the intimate contact, her body heating up everywhere that the blonde's body touched her. Her heart had hammered in her chest as she fought the urge to turn over and show Lucy exactly how she felt about her. She was barely able to breathe and she didn't move a muscle as her body reacted to the woman holding her. She remembered Lucy, as if sensing her discomfort, asking her 'if it was okay' and 'that she just needed to feel someone close'.
Bonnie had managed to squeak out that it was fine, 'whatever she needed', she had said. Lucy had only ever seen her with men since they had been friends. No other woman had turned her head since she had met Lucy. Bonnie had revealed that she had been with women in the past, but Lucy had always presumed that Bonnie was essentially straight. Lucy sensing Bonnie's tense, stiff posture had presumed that maybe she was uncomfortable with them laying that way. Bonnie had placed her arm over Lucy's and had assured her that it was okay and to go to sleep. She had no idea that Bonnie was burning like molten lava with longing and desire and she stayed rigid until sleep overtook her, her fight with her urges disappearing along with it.
Waking up had been even harder when she had roused and felt Lucy's leg thrown over her hip and a hand cupping her breast. She could feel the heat from Lucy's sex against her rump and she had barely managed to suppress the moan as her body responded to their new position. She hadn't been able to bear having Lucy that close to her and not being able to touch her the way she wanted to, so she had delicately untangled herself from her friend and had left. She had lied to Lucy later that same morning when she had called claiming to have had an early breakfast meeting with a client. It had been the first outright lie she had ever told Lucy and it killed her to do it, but she couldn't face her feelings for Lucy either. But now...
Bonnie sighed as she threw the paper towel into the trash can. Nadine had finally pulled the plug on their failing relationship and Bonnie had comforted and supported Lucy as she had mourned the loss of her lover of almost six years. That had been four months ago and every day things got more and more intense between them. Bonnie had noticed that Lucy touched her more often, nothing overtly sexual, a squeeze of her arm or leg or a finger brush on the face to tuck a stray hair behind an ear. But every single touch ignited an unwavering passion within her that took her breat
h away and Bonnie had decided that this trip would be different. Despite the fear that this may destroy their friendship, Bonnie couldn't bear it anymore, she had to tell Lucy how she felt about her.
The squeak of the bathroom door disrupted Bonnie's thoughts and memories. Her eyes had been closed, but she didn't need them to know that Lucy had entered the restroom and a gentle touch of a hand on her shoulder confirmed it as she shuddered from the touch. "Bonnie? Are you okay? What can I do? Did Ryan do something? Talk to me, please."
Bonnie reached up and placed a hand over the blondes and gave it a small squeeze before removing it. Every touch from Lucy lit up the fire within her and she wasn't ready to express her feelings in the bars public restroom. She opened her eyes and looked at Lucy's warm, caring gaze through the mirror. "He's an idiot. And I'm fine. Good riddance," Bonnie said with a shrug of her shoulders. "I'll be out in a second, okay? I promise. Save me some shots."
She tried to give Lucy a reassuring smile, but it failed to reach her eyes. What if she doesn't feel the same way? What if I lose her forever? Those thoughts brought tears to her eyes as her heart clenched painfully in her chest at the thought of losing the woman looking worriedly at her. Her heart almost exploded when Lucy turned Bonnie around to face her and reached out to cup her cheek. Bonnie leaned into that touch and closed her eyes, releasing the salt water to trail down her face. "I didn't realise how much you actually liked him, Bonnie. I'm sorry things didn't work out for you."
