by C. M. Owens
“No way can my tongue ever move that quick. Would this not be painful?”
“I don’t use it on full speed.” I slap my head, then groan when I realize my head hurts too much for that. “Damn it, why are you here?” I ask again.
“Holy shit. What kind of batteries does this thing take? Is this spot for it to plug into the wall or something?”
“Ethan!” I snap. “Why are you here?”
He turns off the vibrator—finally—and tosses it aside, even though I can tell he’s still much too intrigued by it.
“Allie said you’re sick, so I’m here to help. Otherwise she’s staying. In fact, she’s waiting outside, probably listening to us talk about your massive, somewhat emasculating vibrator. I’m starting to question if your orgasms with me have been real.”
He smirks, letting me know he’s fucking with me.
“Why are you here?” I ask for the millionth time. Okay, so maybe it’s not really a million, but it feels like it.
I whimper as I slide back down on the couch, my body being punished for all the energy he’s made me use.
He shuts the light off before coming closer, still not answering my question. It registers too late that he said Allie was outside.
Ah shit. She’s going to be so pissed at me for not telling her about Ethan sooner.
Ethan’s hand feels like fire against my forehead, and I glare at him.
“Fucking shit, Bella. You need a doctor. You’re burning up.”
“It’s a fever. It always feels hotter than it is. My temp is hitting 102, and then it breaks, hence the reason I’m a sweaty, gross mess. I need you to go.”
He frowns as he pulls his hand down.
“You should let me take you to the doctor.”
“It’s a virus. Everyone at the hospital has had it, and I was stupid to think I’d escape, despite the copious amounts of Vitamin C that I’ve been popping. It has flu-like symptoms the first day, and soon the vomiting will commence. Yay me. The point is, there’s not really anything they can give you. It just has to run its course. Now go away.”
He lets his gaze drop to my very embarrassing shirt—yes, the one he left here. I’m wearing it right now. I hate myself.
Surprisingly, he doesn’t mention it. “If I go, then Allie will insist on staying. And she’s got a little girl who might catch… whatever you have.”
“That’s low,” I growl, still glaring at him.
He wisely restrains a smile. “I’m not above fighting dirty. I doubt you want to risk Angel getting sick, and Allie is pretty determined to stick around if no one else is here to take care of you.”
“Then tell her you’ll stay and leave shortly after she does,” I grumble, whimpering as the chills set in. Oh, I hate being sick. Stupid virus. Stupid Ethan. Stupid shirt I don’t want him seeing me wear like a stupid, stupid girl with a stupid crush.
Mentally, I count the amount of times ‘stupid’ crosses my mind, and get sidetracked with that until I notice Ethan wrapping a blanket around me.
“Now you’re sweating and shaking,” he says, stating the obvious as I shiver.
“Fever just broke.” I curl into the blanket, searching for warmth now that I’m freezing. “You’re going to get sick. You really should go.”
“And let Allie get sick instead?” he muses. “No. Besides, I don’t get sick.”
“Everyone gets sick,” I grumble, tired of his ego at this point. It’s no longer charming.
“I haven’t gotten sick like this ever. Swear. My immune system is epic or something. My mom’s the same way.”
When a horrible chill wracks my body, I scowl at him. “If it’s possible, I hate you a little more for that.”
He smiles openly this time. “Rest. I’ll get you something to drink.”
“Don’t be nice to me. It’s easier to be mad at you when you’re not being nice,” I tell him as he stands up and smiles bigger.
“I have my motives for being nice.”
“You’re not getting laid,” I tell him before wiping my nose on the back of my hand, then grimacing when I realize how disgusting that has to look. I hate him seeing me like this. I’m supposed to be sexy and awesome when he sees me so he knows what he’s missing.
“Yeah, so not trying to get laid right now,” he says, still freaking grinning. “But I hope you’ll hear me out if I prove I’m not as big of an asshole as you think I am at the moment.”
When I start to open my mouth, he goes on.
“Not saying you don’t have a right to think that—because you do. Consider this my redemption. Lie down. I’ll put up all the shit Allie bought you.”
Before I can argue, Allie is stepping into view, her eyes moving between us warily.
“You want him to stay, or should I get Wren over here to toss him out?” Allie asks me, even though her eyes are on Ethan.
Ethan smirks before rolling his eyes.
“Apparently you think Wren is stronger than he is,” he quips in his rumble of a voice.
“He did break his brother’s nose,” I point out helpfully. “Twice, I think.”
“And Keith’s nose too,” Allie adds.
Ethan grunts out a laugh before walking into the kitchen, and the full weight of Allie’s stare lands on me.
“So how long has that been going on?” she asks, even though she doesn’t seem the least bit surprised.
Should have known I couldn’t keep anything from her.
“Not very long at all, to be honest. Certainly not long enough for him to take care of me while I look like death’s bitch on a bad hair day.”
She snorts out a laugh while sitting down on a chair.
“You want me to stay, or do you want him to stay?”
I really don’t want him to stay, but I sure as hell don’t want Allie to stay and get sick. She’s already been exposed to me for too long.
“He’ll do,” I grumble, watching as a smile breaks across her face.
“Then I’m going home. When you feel better, I’m totally going to let you have it for not telling me about this sooner.”
There’s not even a hint of anger in her tone, which just makes me feel worse.
“I love you,” I say to her, even though it sounds stuffy and pitiful.
“Yeah. Yeah. That’s not going to save you from my wrath, but I love you too. I’ll hug you when you’re not contagious.”
I flip her off, and she laughs while walking out. I hear her and Ethan talking in the kitchen, along with some rustling of bags, but I can’t make out their words. It takes too much effort to strain and hear, so I just lie back down, staring at the TV that’s on something random.
When I hear the door shut, I look over, watching as Ethan walks back into the room.
“Is she always so protective?” he asks, confusing me.
Deciding not to ask a bunch of questions while stuck in a hazy cloud of this stupid virus, I roll over onto my belly as the worst of the chills subside.
Ethan takes my silence as a hint, but I’m happy when a bottle of water is suddenly beside me. Leaning up, I drink just a little, staying on my stomach as Ethan moves back into the kitchen.
I hear a little clanking and clattering before a delicious smell hits my nose. I love Allie.
My favorite comfort food is chicken noodle mixed with beef broth and vegetable soup, and I can smell it from here. Even though it’s disgusting when I’m healthy, it’s the best thing ever when I’m sick.
Ethan walks in, carrying a steaming bowl of my awesomely weird wonder, and I watch with some satisfaction as he keeps a straight face. He puts the bowl down on the table, and I study him.
“Has anyone ever told you that you’re impossibly stubborn?” I ask him as he sits down on the couch and pulls the coffee table closer to me.
“All the time. Then again, I did start running a very powerful business at the ripe old age of eighteen. I had to be stubborn just to endure it.”
He picks up the remote, pulling up my DVR, and h
e starts my show that he bitched about the night he left.
I’m trying to keep up with him, but he makes it hard to do.
“Okay, spill it. Go ahead and give me your explanation, since that’s the real reason you’re here.”
He eyes me, glancing down at the back of my t-shirt—his t-shirt, rather. He clears his throat while turning his attention to the TV.
“I’ll talk to you when you’re feeling better. Eat your soup and go to sleep.”
“I get that you used to be a boss, but stop being so bossy.”
He smiles, but he still doesn’t look at me.
“So explain why you ignored me instead of being an adult and asking me about who answered my phone. For all you knew, it could have been Wren.”
“I would have recognized Wren’s voice,” he says without missing a beat.
“Like you recognized Maverick’s?” I prod, yawning as the retort leaves my mouth and steals some of the snarky zing it should have had.
He tenses for a second before blowing out a breath. “I’ve talked to Wren on the phone a lot. Maverick… Not so much.”
“I’d recognize Ash’s voice over the phone, and I’ve only talked to her on the phone a few times.”
“Heat of the moment, Bella. Things are different in the heat of the moment. Shut up and eat your soup.”
“Stop telling me to shut up, because everyone will tell you that doesn’t actually work. Tell me what happened so I can decide whether or not it’s okay for you to continue sitting here, seeing me at my worst.”
“If this is your worst, then I definitely want another chance.” His lips tilt in a lopsided smile, and some stupid little fluttering thing happens in my stomach. Damn those butterflies.
Ethan Noles being sweet is a really bad thing for me.
“Explain. My patience is starting to unravel.”
“Eat your damn gross soup.”
My lips twist in a wry grin, and he shakes his head while sitting back, looking flustered.
“You’ve had a lot of relationships, right?” he asks me randomly while pulling my feet in his lap.
I roll over onto my back, glancing at my soup. It still looks too hot to eat, considering the amount of steam rising from it.
“Thanks for reminding me how terrible I am at this,” I say, looking back at Ethan, who groans while scrubbing his face with his hands.
“I meant you know how to have a relationship. Bella, I haven’t done anything like this since high school, and it didn’t end too well back then.”
I sit up so quickly that it feels like the Hulk just punched through the front of my skull. When I curse and clutch my head, Ethan is suddenly beside me, gently lowering me back down.
“I’ll put the soup up. Just go to sleep, Bella. You can’t get better without rest, food, and lots of fluids. Allie’s orders.”
I scowl at him. “You expect me to believe you haven’t had sex with anyone since high school?”
His eyebrows go up. “I didn’t say I haven’t fucked anyone. I said I haven’t done anything like this. Hell, I haven’t had time.”
“So the last girl you dated was Star?”
He stiffens, but he nods.
“And she and Maverick…” Things slowly click into place. “Which is why you and Maverick don’t spend long hours on the phone.”
“Star and I were pretty serious, and she was slipping off with Maverick. I had no idea, and he had no clue she and I were a thing. I’m usually pretty private about my shit. He didn’t care enough about her to fight over her, but we came to blows because I lost my cool.”
“She was that important? Are… Um… Did you get over her?”
He grunts. “I got over her the second I found out she was having sex with Mav. I don’t like being played. But there’s something you should know.”
“Which is?” I ask, trying and failing to sit up again.
“Star was the first person to touch me that I ever felt without being surprised.”
I have no idea what that is supposed to mean, and I blame it on the virus.
“Huh?”
He looks so vulnerable right now as he brushes a piece of hair away from my face.
“When I was twelve, I lost all feeling in my body.”
I’m so confused.
“How?”
“The docs said I mentally blocked it out. Your brain is what actually delivers the message to the rest of your body to feel. The sensory nerves deliver the message to the brain when part of your body is in distress or anything else. But it’s your brain’s responsibility to send that message out to your body to actually feel it. When you block it out, it’s harder to get that message through with clarity.”
I’m positively, one hundred percent dumbfounded.
“But why?”
“The why has nothing to do with this conversation. The point is, I lost all feeling young in life. The only thing I could feel was severe pain, which resulted in a lot of stupid decisions. At least, until Star.”
Yeah, it’s like a punch to the gut. “She was special.”
He nods slowly. “I thought so. I felt her touch me. Usually, I could only feel something as simple as a touch when someone surprised me. But with her, I could feel a touch that didn’t have to be laced with pain. And, well, you can figure out the rest. After her, I learned I could feel sex, even though it took a while to get going. My guard slowly lowers during that, and I can feel everything during that time. I sort of made a lot of bad decisions with that too. But since it was the easiest way to feel, I took what I could get.”
I’m not so sure I want to hear anymore.
“Then you fucking patted my cheek in that damn emergency room.”
I frown in confusion as he groans.
“Sorry,” I say, only because I’m not sure what the big deal is.
“Don’t be. Because I felt it when you touched my cheek, and it wasn’t because you surprised me.”
My eyes widen, and I can’t help but smile. “So you can’t feel anything, but you felt me?”
Chapter 34
ETHAN
I really, really fucking hate this line of questioning, but I knew it was coming the second I started telling her ancient shit.
“Yeah, but I can feel things now.”
She frowns, which confuses me. “But you felt Star and only Star?”
“I felt her when she touched me, and being young like I was, I thought it meant something special.”
“But it doesn’t?” Bella asks. “Because you also felt me, and now you can feel everything.”
Why does she look disappointed?
I really suck at this.
“Yeah, I started feeling again little by little after that day you patted my cheek. The shrinks told my parents it would happen one day when I felt secure with myself and my surroundings.”
“You felt insecure?” she asks, probing a little too far.
“Focus on the part where I could feel again, Bella. Nothing else.”
She sighs harshly while studying me. “So it was just a coincidence that I patted your cheek that day and your feeling came back. And you stalked me because you thought I was special, only to learn that your feeling was back for everything and not just me. How am I doing?”
“Considering you aren’t questioning the mental block thing, pretty well. And yes, I did stalk you a little because of it.”
Why does she look so damn deflated?
“I’ve seen a lot of traumatized patients deal with things by using mental resources in a way I never thought possible. We’ll discuss how you got there when you feel comfortable.”
Shit. I forget she works in a hospital. Thankfully she isn’t pushing, because I don’t want to have this discussion when she’s barely coherent and fighting to stay awake.
“So Star was special, because you only felt her,” she goes on, snapping me out of my thoughts.
It dawns on me as to why she’s acting like this, and I resist the urge to smirk. “Star fucked Maveri
ck while we were serious. So no, she wasn’t too special.”
“But she would have been if she hadn’t been a cheater.”
“It’s really important that you’re special, isn’t it?” I muse, watching as her eyebrows knit together. She doesn’t look embarrassed though. Hell, she doesn’t even look insecure.
“What girl doesn’t want the magic touch?” she asks flatly, as though that’s the obvious answer.
Laughing under my breath, I lean back, confused about how easy this conversation has gone in comparison to how I thought it would go.
“Bella, I don’t know if you have a magic touch or not, but I do know I slowly started feeling again after that day. The numbness came and went—still does—but if it makes you feel any better, I’ve felt you touch me every time you have. It’s one of the many reasons I can’t be around you for five seconds without stripping you naked. Unless you’re sick and hating me, of course.”
She fights a smile as her eyes close.
“I guess that’s close enough.” She sighs with a content smile on her lips.
“Oh? You feel special enough now?” I ask, hoping to tease her a little and get back to how we were, but… she doesn’t answer. In fact, her entire body goes limp as a light snoring sound starts coming from her.
My body shakes with silent laughter at how quickly she’s out, and I snatch her untouched, disgusting bowl of soup. After wrapping it up and putting it in the fridge to be reheated later, I head back toward the living room and change the channel off her damn chick show.
While Bella sleeps, Allie calls numerous times to check in on her, and I’m using a damn weird thermometer on her head like she’s a baby while she sleeps just so I can update Nurse Allie.
My phone buzzes on the table, and I grab it when I see my father’s name flash across the screen. There had so better not be another work thing.
“Hello?”
“Ethan, sorry to bother you so late,” he says, though we both know he doesn’t mind calling me no matter what time it is. “But your mother insists on finding out if you’re coming to dinner next week. She had to reschedule your Welcome Home dinner because of the business deal you needed to take care of, but she’s got it all planned out once again.”
