What he did was somehow better and worse. He crushed me to him, wrapping his arms around me so I could bury my face in his chest.
There was nowhere I’d rather be than safe in Drew’s arms. Things always felt better when I had Drew propping me up. At least they normally did. In this moment, drawing strength from him was so, so much worse.
I pushed back from him, dashing at my eyes with my hands.
“Soph, please talk to me,” he pleaded as he tried to pull me back to him.
I shoved his hands away. “Stop. Please, just…stop.”
“Stop what?”
“Being nice to me,” I answered, my voice rising.
He huffed out a laugh. “Why wouldn’t I be nice to you?”
The truth I’d been holding on to all week was right on the edge. It wouldn’t take much more of a push before I flew off.
“Because I don’t deserve it.”
“That’s ridiculous. No one deserves it more than you.”
I flailed around with my hands, not wanting to be honest but wanting to lie even less.
“Just tell me what’s going on.” His voice was worried, tinged with a flash of irritation. He was losing his patience with me, and I obviously couldn’t blame him.
I felt frantic. Like I was being suffocated by my own skin.
“I’m not happy for you,” I blurted, hoping the truth would lessen the constricting feeling.
He reeled back a step as if I’d slapped him. “What do you mean?”
“With the bar, the grand opening, everything. I’m not happy for you. I desperately want to be, but I just…can’t feel it.”
Drew took a couple steps back and lowered himself onto my bed. He was quiet for a second before asking, “Why?”
I laughed, but there was no joy in it. “Because I’m selfish. Because even though this is all my fault, I don’t want to suffer any of the consequences for it. Because I’m scared of what this could mean for me professionally. I wish it were different. Wish I were different. But I can’t help how I feel.”
When he spoke again, his voice was deeper and more frayed around the edges. “But why? I thought we talked about how the odds of anyone at your job finding out were small.”
“No, you discussed it. You convinced yourself and Sean that this would have no impact on you. And you’re probably right. But that doesn’t mean it won’t have an impact on me. If people at Margot Nathan find out I’d not only known about the deck but helped name it, created the concept, and worked on promotional materials on company time, what do you think that would mean for me?”
He looked at me like he was trying to understand, but he remained silent.
“I’m working at one of the most prestigious firms on the East Coast. If they wanted to blackball me, they could. It’s not just about not getting a good reference from them. They could actively ruin my career before it’s even started. And from what I’ve seen of them, they’re exactly the kind of people who’d do it.”
Drew stood and moved closer to me, though he didn’t reach for me. “These are a lot of coulds, Sophia. What are the odds of any of that happening?”
“I really don’t know. I’m probably just being paranoid. But Jake already sold me out once, and he knows what I was working on. I have no idea if he’ll come sniffing around and turn me in to the rest of them. I definitely can’t discount that he would.”
Drew shook his head slowly. “Why didn’t you tell me any of this? Why wait until two hours before the grand opening?”
I shrugged. “Because what does it change?”
“It changes everything,” he replied, his tone exasperated.
“Does it? What would you have done differently? Would you not have opened? Would you have told Sean his deck couldn’t be everything you said it would?”
When he didn’t answer, I stepped closer to him. “What would have changed?” I was barely restraining myself from yelling, not because I was angry at him but because I couldn’t hold it in anymore. I’d thought through all of this over and over all week, and I was sick of thinking about it.
“I don’t know,” he finally said. “But we could’ve figured it out. If you’d said something before today, we could’ve thought of another way.”
“There is no other way. I want you to have success, Drew. I want you and Brody to show what you can do with this opportunity so that it grows into new, better opportunities in the future. I just wish your success didn’t have to hurt my career. But that’s not your fault or your problem.”
“Not my problem? Your problems are my problems,” he said as he gestured between us. “That’s how this has always worked.”
I put a hand on his cheek and caressed his jaw. “Not this time. You need to do what’s best for you. And I’ll…figure things out on my end.”
He groaned and pushed his hands through his hair. “I just… How am I supposed to go to the opening with this hanging over us? I don’t understand why you couldn’t have told me what was wrong before now.”
When he looked at me, I gave him a small smile. “Because this is the first time you’ve asked.”
He dropped his hands to his sides. “So this is my fault?”
“No, it’s definitely mine. But it was easy to not talk about it when you weren’t asking. Now, I…I dunno. I couldn’t hold it in. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be sorry for being honest with me. I’m not mad at you for that.”
“But you’re mad at me for something.” It wasn’t a question. Of course he was mad. He’d have been crazy not to be.
“Yes. No. I don’t know. My emotions are all…jumbled.”
“I get that.”
“So,” he began, “what do we do now?”
“You go to your opening, and you knock it out of the park.”
When my words registered, his face hardened. I’d rarely seen him like that, and he’d never aimed it at me. Even when he’d broken up with me months ago, he’d been more blank than angry.
“You’re not even coming to the opening now?”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
He scoffed. “Of course. Because only you make decisions now.”
“Drew, that’s not—”
“No, it’s fine. I’ll just do what’s best for me, like you said.” He moved to the door and wrenched it open, but he paused before he walked through it. “You know, I thought all of this—everything we’ve been working for—was moving us toward our future. I thought we were in this together. That’s the most disappointing thing about this whole mess. We haven’t been growing together. We’re heading in two completely different directions.”
I opened my mouth to reply, but he was gone before I could.
He’d left me behind again—but this time, I’d pushed him away. And as I plopped down on my bed and let the tears flow freely, I had no idea how to get him back.
Chapter Twenty-One
D R E W
Despite my inner turmoil, I couldn’t have been more pleased with how the evening was turning out.
The Yard had managed to generate a lot of buzz, and people had come out in droves to see the space. All the games were being utilized, the liquor was flowing, food was steadily leaving the kitchen, and the band I’d hired was keeping the mood lively but not crazed.
If I hadn’t been worrying that my relationship had suffered a fatal blow, I’d be ecstatic.
“Dude,” Brody said as he slung an arm around my neck. “This is awesome.”
I turned and smiled at my friend. “It is. And shouldn’t you be behind the bar?”
“Killjoy,” Brody said, the name sounding affectionate.
“I hate to interrupt this bro-ment, but I need drinks,” Aamee said as she approached us. Her gaze flitted to the bar. “Oh, never mind. Xander’s back from break. His drinks are better than yours.”
“Wait…what?” Brody called as he trailed behind her, his tone indignant.
I smiled as I watched him chase her, but my face couldn’t
hold the expression long. As I looked around again, I wished I could be…happier. Part of me was angry at Sophia for taking that from me—for taking what was supposed to be one of my proudest moments and souring it. Everything seemed a little less bright than it should’ve been.
But hell, I had to admit it was my fault too. She was right. I hadn’t asked how she felt about what had happened or how all of this would affect her. My lens had only seen my own focal point, completely ignoring her interests that existed in the periphery.
That probably didn’t make me the best boyfriend in the world. And as I watched Brody snuggle into Aamee, I had to admit I probably wasn’t even the best boyfriend in this space.
I gave myself a shake. This emo shit needed to stop. I had a deck to run.
And run it I did. Over the next hour, I circled the room and checked in with guests, made small talk, grabbed ice, ran food. Whatever was needed, I did. Keeping busy helped me stay in the moment and kept my mind from wandering to the one person whose lack of presence cast a melancholy gloom over the entire evening.
Nope, none of that.
I saw a table that had been vacated, and not seeing a busboy around, I rushed over to clear the glassware that had been left behind. With martini and pint glasses dangling from every finger, I turned to make my way to the small dishwasher behind the bar. But I only made it one step before I stopped dead in my tracks.
Because there, at the top of the stairs that led to the deck, surrounded by fairy lights that gave her an otherworldly glow, was Sophia. She looked around for a second, Taylor close at her side, before she spotted me.
She smiled shyly.
Taylor followed her line of sight and smiled as well. She lightly grazed Sophia’s arm, said something to her, and made her way toward me.
“I’ll take those from you,” Taylor said, gathering the glasses into her arms. “She’s really sorry.”
“So am I.” I huffed out a laugh before closing the distance between Sophia and me. She did the same, meeting me halfway.
“You came,” I said.
“Yeah, I’m…I’m sorry about earlier. I—”
I reached out and ran my hand lightly down her arm before taking her hand and twining our fingers. “I’m so glad you’re here.”
“I’m glad I’m here too.”
I smiled. “We can figure the rest out later.”
She smiled back. “Sounds like a plan.”
I pulled her close and pressed a soft kiss to her lips, feeling her smile against mine.
We had a lot to talk through, but for the first time since I’d arrived at the Yard that night, I felt like I could breathe. With Sophia by my side, I gave myself over to the euphoric moment of finally opening this place.
Everything else could wait.
S O P H I A
I was so glad I’d gotten my head out of my ass and come to Drew’s grand opening. I’d never have forgiven myself if I’d missed it, not just because I would’ve missed one of the biggest moments of his life to date but because I would’ve missed how happy he was. He simply glowed in this role, and it was a sight to behold.
The sun was starting to set, and things were ramping up.
Brody bustled over to us. “Aamee was right.”
“Ew, about what?” I asked.
“Xander’s drinks are better than mine. Maybe I should take classes.”
“This is what’s going to finally drive you to school?” I asked. “Your lackluster cocktail-making skills?”
Brody stared at me. “I know you’re making fun of me, but…yes.”
Drew and I laughed, and I got a small thrill at seeming to be back in the same mental place with him, even if it was momentary.
I had faith we’d find our way back permanently soon—we’d struggled through more than this—but it still felt pretty shitty that what should’ve been a perfect night had been tainted by my feelings. Even though I knew I had a right to feel them and I didn’t regret telling him, I hated that it had happened at such an inconvenient time.
“Where’d you find the band?” I asked Drew in a poor attempt to prompt some normal conversation between us.
Despite having spent a good bit of the night together since I arrived, we hadn’t said much to one another.
“Xander.”
Okay, so you’re not up for talking.
Brody was nice enough to elaborate, and some of the awkwardness dissipated with his explanation. The singer was a guy Xander had roomed with as a freshman, and he’d talked them up. Once Drew had listened to some of their stuff, he was sold. They had an easygoing beachy vibe that fit well with the atmosphere. Drew and Brody had requested that they interject some of their original songs in between some covers so people would hear some familiar stuff, and it seemed to be working.
They’d set up on a small covered stone patio that Drew had made for that exact purpose. The only downside was that having a band there would be weather contingent. From the deck, I could see a small crowd gathering in front of the band to dance, and a lot of the people I didn’t even recognize, which was good because it meant that real customers were having a good time and not just the ones who’d come out to support us.
“Looks like everyone’s having a good time,” I said, pointing to the group. “It’s like a Jimmy Buffett concert without the parrots.”
“I’m not sure I know what that means.” The voice had come from behind me, but I didn’t need to turn around to recognize it.
“Toby!” the three of us screamed.
“You made it,” Drew said. “I thought Carter said you had a…thing.”
“Yeah, well, I wanted to surprise you guys, and Carter’s mouth is bigger than a Megalodon’s.”
“Hey, fucker, I heard that.” And there was Carter, grabbing Toby around the neck and pulling him into a headlock. “I don’t know what a megawhatever is, but I take offense to that.”
“It’s the biggest shark that ever lived. It could open its mouth wide enough for two people to stand one on top of the other.”
“Well, that’s stupid. Who would voluntarily stand in a shark’s mouth?”
Toby’s lips parted, but he didn’t seem like he wanted to answer right away. “No one,” he finally said. “It’s been extinct for longer than people have been alive.”
“Uh… That only makes your little fact that much more unimpressive. Besides,” Carter said, “sharks can’t talk, so nothing you’ve said makes any sense.”
It was pointless to argue with Carter, and I recognized the moment that realization swept over Toby’s face.
“You’re right, man. It was stupid. It’s good to see you, though.”
“You too,” Carter said, giving Toby a hug that was so tight it resulted in Toby getting lifted off the ground. “Dude, you put on some weight? You feel heavier.”
I knew better than to ask when Carter had picked up Toby last and why, but I couldn’t help but wonder. I guessed that Drew and Brody were curious about it too, but neither mentioned it. They just gave Toby a hug also.
“Hey, look.” Carter tapped Brody on the chest but didn’t look his way. “Old people dancing.”
We all glanced over the railing of the deck to see who he was looking at.
“Those aren’t just any old people,” I said. “They’re my parents.”
“Oh, shit, sorry. I’m surprised I didn’t recognize your dad. Maybe he looks different when he’s enjoying himself.”
“Your mom seems to be thoroughly enjoying herself too,” Toby added, his raised eyebrow indicating that her enjoyment wasn’t completely innocent. She had a drink in her hand and had just begun gyrating against my father.
My mouth dropped open, but Brody found the words before I did.
“That’s the most revolting thing I’ve seen since the morning after I had too much tequila and Mexican takeout.”
“Thank you for that image,” Drew muttered, his voice devoid of any emotion.
When I turned toward him, he looked to be in some so
rt of catatonic trance.
Unable to look away, we all watched silently as my parents laughed, drank, and spun each other around on the grassy dance floor.
“Well,” Drew finally said, “I guess it’s a good sign if the Yard can cause this kind of a reaction in them.”
“When did they even get here?” I asked.
“Right before you did,” Brody responded. “But after they spent ten minutes badgering Drew and me about how things were going, they hotfooted it down to the band. I don’t even know why he had so many questions. I talked to him two days ago and laid out our plans for launch. The man just likes to bullshit about business.”
“And shake his ass,” Carter added.
“Gross, dude,” Brody said.
“They look happy,” I observed. “That’s gotta be a good sign.”
Drew almost looked sheepish. “Yeah, they actually seemed pretty impressed.”
I gave him a smile. “I’m sure they were.”
Aamee’s voice pulled our attention back toward the bar. “Hey! Why do Xander and I have to work while you two clowns get to stand around and enjoy the view?” She was piling some martinis and glasses of wine carefully onto a tray, and I held my breath as she stooped down to lift it.
For people who had no experience bartending or waiting tables, Xander and Aamee had definitely surprised us with their abilities.
“I asked Brody the same thing,” Drew told her.
“I’m going, I’m going,” Brody assured them before heading toward the bar.
“And what about you, boss man?” Aamee asked Drew.
“I’m making sure things run smoothly.”
“And just so you know,” Brody said to her, “the view we were all ‘enjoying’ was my parents dirty dancing.” He visibly shivered at the thought.
Aamee had to steady the tray when her entire body reacted to Brody’s statement. “Let me drop these off first, but I gotta see this.”
“You won’t be able to unsee it!” he called after her as she scurried off.
Two Truths & a Lime (The Love Game Book 3) Page 16
