by M. E. Nesser
Dear Katharine,
Today was very special. I am so thankful that you came into my life. I’ll miss you tonight. Dream happy, my love. I’ll see you in the morning.
Love, Ian
34
I woke up slightly confused. Sun was streaming in the windows. Was it morning already and where had Ian gone? I looked at the clock. It was almost seven. I couldn’t believe it. I hadn’t slept that long in ages. I was stretching and thinking about Thanksgiving when I noticed a note on the pillow next to me.
I read the note from Ian and couldn’t help but smile. He was so wonderful, and Jack liked him. I hadn’t realized how important that was to me. My guys liked each other. It brought me so much joy.
Sometimes I felt a little guilty about finding happiness again. It was a strange sensation, but every once in a while it was exactly how I felt. Part of me felt as though, despite our pact, I was betraying the memory of my husband by moving on. I had been walking around in such a dismal funk for so long that it felt so strange to have good feelings on a daily basis again. I closed my eyes and said a quiet prayer. I needed some kind of reassurance that I was doing the right thing. As I prayed for guidance, the image of the olive kept invading my thoughts. It made me smile. Bryce didn’t want me to be sad anymore. Frankly, neither did I.
I opened my eyes and stared out the window at the beautiful day. This waking up alone nonsense was for the birds. I felt lonely in my bed and thought about texting Ian, but I didn’t want to wake him. I jumped in the shower and shaved my legs. When I got out, I decided to put on a little makeup and dry my hair. As I was brushing my teeth, I heard a knock on my bathroom door.
“I wanted to serve you coffee in bed, but you weren’t there. Why are you up so early, counselor?” I heard Ian say.
I rinsed my mouth, opened the door, and pulled him into the most scandalous kiss. He responded with such fervor that I could feel my arousal growing. It didn’t help that I was only in my undies and his favorite Yale shirt.
“We better cool it. I’d hate for Jack to hear us,” I said.
“I bring good news. Jack was in the kitchen when I got here. He wanted me to tell you he was going over to Tommy’s for breakfast then to the club to play squash. He said he’d be back to for lunch around noon. It’s just you and me and a strong cup of coffee and cream, my lady.”
“Then let me crawl back to bed and you can bring me my coffee. I’m up for a do-over this morning,” I teased him.
By the time we’d finished fooling around, the coffee was cold. It didn’t matter. Sex with Ian was a better way to wake up than coffee ever could be. Having two orgasms before eight in the morning was a perfect way to start the day.
We talked about our plans for the rest of the day. Ian was taking his girls to see his parents in the afternoon, and they were planning on having dinner there. Jack had said he wanted to lie low with me. We planned on ordering some kind of takeout and watching a movie together.
“How would you feel about the five of us getting together again?” I asked. “I don’t want to rush things, but yesterday was such a great time. Maybe you could see if the girls are interested in going out to dinner tomorrow night. We could even go to a show beforehand.”
Ian smiled. “Sounds like a great plan. I think it would be awesome for all of us to get together again, especially if you don’t have to cook all day to make it happen. But I have to say—I have one problem with our plans for the weekend.”
“What problem?” I asked.
“I don’t get to have a sleepover with my favorite girl for two more nights. I hated waking up alone this morning. I can’t sleep without you next to me. Solitary slumber is very detrimental to my health,” he whined.
“I missed you, too, but we’ve managed to sleep apart for nearly fifty years. I don’t think two more nights will ignite some fatal disease in your body.”
“I suppose you’re right. Doesn’t mean I’m going to like it, though. I think these are going to be the longest two nights of my life.” He leaned over and kissed me hard.
35
Holy crap, what was wrong with me? There were so many women at Yale to choose from and here I was, smitten with my mom’s boyfriend’s daughter. I couldn’t help it, though. She was so freaking adorable. We’d had so much fun last night. During the movie, she’d gotten so scared that she’d practically jumped in my lap and buried her head in my chest. She felt amazing to hold. I wrapped my arms around her and tried to protect her from the horrifying images on the movie screen. I had never felt so comfortable holding a girl before. I could have held onto her forever.
Her body was warm and soft, and she wore a musky perfume that reeked of sex. OK, maybe that wasn’t the best description, but sex was all I could think of when I smelled her. I could feel myself getting hard as I held her, and I prayed to God she wouldn’t notice. A guy’s body can betray him in an instant, and it totally sucks. I didn’t want to embarrass myself or make her feel uncomfortable, but I had no control of how hard I got. I wrapped my arms around her and whispered random things in her ears to calm her down while one particularly gruesome scene played out. When it was over, she sat back in her seat and grabbed my hand.
“Thanks for that,” she said.
“My pleasure. The scene was a little over the top, even for me,” I admitted.
“I’m usually not such a wuss, but the way he was gouging out her eyes made me want to throw up that beautiful dinner your mom made.”
“Where did you meet my mom before? It seemed like you guys had already met,” I asked.
“Oh yeah, we had lunch together about a week ago. Your mom is so cool. I’m kind of jealous—my mom’s a total flake. My sister and I decided to live with Dad after they split, because Mom got more whacked out every day. Besides, we never spent any time with her when we all lived together; we always had nannies and babysitters. Sometimes, the cleaning ladies would watch us so she could go do her own thing—shopping, going out with friends, partying…She was never a very good mom. It sucked, but I’m over it now.”
“I’m really sorry. I knew they got a divorce, but I didn’t know the details. Jeez, it sounds like she didn’t even want to be a mom. That totally sucks. How’s your relationship with her now?”
“Not great. She cheated on my dad, and now she’s living with the guy she was screwing. He’s a trainer at her gym. He’s good-looking and stuff, but it’s still weird—he’s so much younger than she is. I doubt he makes much money, and my dad’s stupid rich, so Mom tried to get a ridiculous settlement. It didn’t work though. She gets a monthly allowance, but she’s not happy with it.”
“If it’s any consolation, my mom is one of the most loyal people you could ever meet. She was so devoted to my dad; she was so devastated when he died that I was scared she was going to die, too. It’s been the shittiest year ever. I’m so glad she met your dad. She really likes him. And you don’t have to worry about her wanting his money. She’s got plenty of her own, and besides, she isn’t like that,” I shared.
“My dad’s really happy with her, too. You should hear how he talks about her. It’s adorable. He couldn’t wait for us to meet her. I was really surprised—after what my mom did, my dad swore off women. He kept saying that Em and I were the only women he needed in his life. I knew that was bullshit, but he’d been saying it for years. All he did was work and exercise. We prayed he’d find somebody nice, and voila—there came your mom!” Sara beamed.
“Thanks, Sara. That means a lot to me. All of this turned out so much better than I thought it would. I’m stoked that your dad is so nice, and you guys are so cool.”
When the movie ended, I wasn’t ready for our time to be over. We had a lot of things to talk about. Sara was different than other girls. I loved her constant chatter and energy. It was obvious that the divorce had forced her to grow up; it seemed like she had a really good perspective on things. I didn’t even care she was Ian’s daughter—I liked her. I invited her back to our apartment, which
she gladly agreed to. I got the feeling she liked me just as much as I liked her. It was strange, but cool.
We watched Cast Away with Tom Hanks and ate some popcorn in our living room. When he lost his volleyball, we both got choked up. If you have any human emotion, it’s impossible not to feel Tom Hank’s pain when he loses Wilson. As we were sitting there in silence, tears in our eyes, we looked at each other and burst into hysterical laughter. Crying over a volleyball seems absurd, but it’s a tough scene to watch; it gets to me every time. It obviously affected Sara the same way. When it was time for her to go back to her dad’s, I offered to walk her home. It was about a twenty-minute walk, but it was pretty nice out, and I was hoping to get a little more time with her. We chatted the whole way to her dad’s. We had a ton in common, and I loved being with her. I wasn’t sure what to do before I left her, so I gave her a hug and thanked her for a great night.
She hugged me back. “I’m glad Katharine has such a cool son,” she said playfully.
“And I’m glad Ian has such a cool daughter,” I said earnestly.
“See ya later, Wilson,” she joked.
“Later,” I replied with a laugh.
She smiled, stood up on her toes, and kissed my cheek. Then she ran up the stairs to the entrance of her building. I was elated. I had to find a way to see her again.
36
After we had our coffee in bed, Ian left before Jack got home from his friend’s. I wanted some time with my son, and I didn’t want him to think Ian had totally invaded our lives. Jack said he felt like sushi, so we walked to our favorite Japanese restaurant. I was anxious to hear what he’d thought about Thanksgiving, but I waited until we ordered before I asked him.
“What did you think of the Jensens?” I asked cautiously.
“Ian is great, Mom. We had a long talk this morning. He’s really into you. I’m good with that. Sara told me more about her parents’ divorce. His wife sounds like a total bitch. I couldn’t even imagine you or Dad cheating,” he said reflectively. “I don’t know how you could do that to someone you supposedly love. It’s such a shitty thing to do.”
“I don’t believe in cheating. I was completely devoted to your dad, as he was to me. It’s the only way to have a relationship, in my opinion. People who cheat are weak and cowardly. I could never be with someone like that. I’m very sad for Ian and the girls—he would have stayed with her; he believed in the vows he took.”
“That had to really suck for him. I’m glad he got out. I can’t imagine you not wanting to be a part of my life. It would have devastated me. Sara seems to be taking it all in stride, though.”
“It sounds like you and Sara spent a lot of time talking,” I commented.
“She’s pretty great, Mom. It feels kind of weird since she’s Ian’s kid, but I really like her. We had a blast last night. I don’t think I’ve ever had such a good time with a girl before,” he admitted to me hesitantly.
“That’s great, Jack. So what if she’s Ian’s daughter? Friendship—or even love—doesn’t care who her dad is or isn’t dating. If you like her, then go for it. You should never take being happy for granted: we learned that the hard way, didn’t we? If nothing else, you guys sound like you’re going to be friends,” I told him.
My son looked extremely relieved by what I had said to him. “Really? You don’t mind? That’s great. I couldn’t believe how much I liked her. She is so different than any other girl I’ve ever gone out with,” Jack said in a very relieved tone. “I thought you might be mad—or maybe it would be too weird.”
“I’d never be mad if you followed your heart…So, I guess you won’t mind if I arrange for the five of us to have dinner Saturday night?”
“That’d be awesome, Mom,” Jack said with a grin, “I’d like to spend more time with all three of them. And if he’s going to be a part of your life, I need to get to know him better.”
37
The girls and I had planned to see my parents on Friday. Emily and Sara hadn’t seen their grandparents since the beginning of the semester, and my parents were a huge part of the girls’ life. When my wife and I split, they came to the city to help out, taking the girls for a weekend now and again so they could do fun things like sailing and horseback riding. I’m not sure I could have survived without their help.
The ride to my folks’ place took about an hour. The traffic was pretty light for a Friday afternoon, and I imagined everyone was taking advantage of the Black Friday sales going on in the city. The girls talked most of the way; it was obvious they’d missed each other as much as I’d missed them. I was so glad that the divorce hadn’t pulled the three of us apart. Even though my wife had screwed me, I wasn’t about to let her screw with the relationship I had with my daughters. They meant the world to me. And now, so did Katharine.
When I was able to get a word in edgewise, I asked the girls about dinner on Saturday night. Emily had already committed to going to Martin’s, but Sara enthusiastically agreed to join us. She wanted to know where we were going and if Jack was going to be there. I was tempted to ask her why she sounded so excited about seeing Jack again, but I didn’t want to embarrass her in front of her sister. It sounded to me like she was digging Katharine’s son. Well, wasn’t that unexpected!
At one point during the drive, I pulled over to talk to them about something serious. They were nervous at first when I told them we needed to talk about something privately as a family, but the conversation went better than I’d expected. They were very receptive to the plan I was formulating. Life had really changed for me, and I felt so blessed that my daughters were supportive. I was so proud of the young women they had become.
My parents were thrilled to see us. They were the healthiest seventy-year-old people you could ever meet. They played golf and tennis. They loved sailing and riding horses. They had a ton of friends and socialized several times a week. Mom had made us her version of a Thanksgiving dinner. It was beautifully presented and scrumptious as ever. It was also much different from Katharine’s, so it didn’t feel like we were eating the same meal two days in a row.
As dinner was ending, my mother asked me what we had done for Thanksgiving. I was about to answer when Sara chirped in.
“We went to Katharine’s, Grandma. That’s dad’s new girlfriend. She’s amazing. You’re going to love her!” Sara beamed.
“I’ve actually met her, sweetheart. Your dad brought her to our B52 benefit last month. She was quite lovely. I’m happy to hear you’re still dating her, Ian. Is it serious?”
“Of course it is, Grandma,” Sara blurted out. “They’re adorable together!”
“Yes, Mom, it’s serious,” I interrupted my highly enthusiastic daughter. “I love Katharine.”
“Love? Are you sure, Ian? You loved the other one—no offense, girls—and she crushed your heart and your bank account. You need to be careful,” my mom said possessively.
“Don’t worry. She’s nothing like their mother. She’s an extremely hardworking woman who doesn’t want anything from me but love. And I’m confident that she has plenty of her own money and couldn’t care less about mine. She’s not like that. I think she’s my forever, Mom.”
“Oh, goodness gracious, that’s wonderful!” my mom shouted. She jumped out of her chair and came over to hug me. My dad just smiled my way and said nothing. Both of the girls had big smiles on their faces. I knew they were happy with my decision. It had felt amazing to tell Katharine that I loved her. Now I had said it aloud to the four most important people in my life—and that felt amazing, too. Katharine was my forever. And it was time for her to know that simple and monumental fact.
38
I’m not sure why, but I was nervous about dinner. Jack had confided a pretty serious secret to me when he told me about his attraction to Sara, and I didn’t want to share that with Ian until my son gave me permission. I knew it would be hard not analyzing the way Jack and Sara talked and acted around each other, and I was worried that Sara wouldn’t be a
s into Jack as he was into her. You never want to see your children put in an awkward situation—or, even worse, in any kind of pain. I hoped she reciprocated his feelings.
We met at Pane Vino at seven; Sara wanted to see her uncle before she went back to school, and she said she was craving his lasagna and a homemade cannoli. I loved how close their family was, and I knew Jack would love the food. The restaurant held great memories for me since it was the first place Ian ever took me for dinner. Even though I was nervous when we went to the restaurant, as soon as I saw Ian, all my anxiety went away.
Ian and Jack shook hands while Sara and I hugged. When Ian pulled me into an embrace and kissed my cheek, I saw my son give Sara a hug. Ian looked surprised. I was simply happy that Sara returned the gesture with the same intensity. Young love was in front of us. I could feel it. When Ian looked at me quizzically, I whispered in his ear, “I’ll tell you more later.”
Dinner was fantastic as usual. Todd came and sat with us for a while. He seemed like a really nice guy. He recognized that I had put on some weight since he’d first met me and jokingly accused Ian of trying to fatten me up so no other men would look at me. Ian yelled at him for being rude, but I knew I wasn’t overweight; I took it as a compliment. I knew I looked better. I found out that Todd had been married for about twenty years and had two teenage sons. During the school holidays, they worked at the restaurant, so I was bound to meet them. They went to a private school that Ian paid for. Ian had never mentioned that fact, but it was obvious that his brother was grateful. It was also obvious that my boyfriend was a very generous man with an even more generous heart.
Todd said that he had spoken to their mother that morning, and she was full of news that she couldn’t wait to share with the world. He then looked at Ian and asked his big brother if there was anything he wanted to tell him. Ian got a funny look on his face, and Sara giggled. I looked around the table and wondered what I was missing. I stared at Ian until he was forced to meet my gaze.
