She returned his smile and handed him a towel so he could dry off. "Yeah, I'd like that." She stood and secured her matching sarong around her waist.
Minutes later they were strolling along the shore hand in hand, with the ocean lapping against their feet and their toes sinking into the wet sand. A light, warm breeze blew off the coast, tousling Alex's damp hair around his head and making her wrap swirl against her legs. Their walk was relaxing and serene, and though they were both quiet, there was no tension between them.
Amazingly, the day had begun without the Angst in which the previous night had ended, and for that Dana was extremely grateful. They'd slept in until after nine A. M., then ordered breakfast from room service and ate the meal out on their balcony, with a spectacular view of the ocean. At eleven they headed to the spa for their appointment and enjoyed soothing, stress-reducing massages, then opted for a late lunch at the resort's cafe before going their separate ways for a few hours.
Alex had gone to the golfing range to hit a few buckets of balls, and Dana had taken a book to the pool to relax and read, until she'd fallen asleep. Everything about the day was normal and pleasant and enjoyable, but she knew it was all a temporary reprieve. Alex was giving her time and space to figure things out for herself, which she appreciated, but she was all too aware that the clock was ticking on their time together and she'd eventually have to give him an answer to his proposal.
She'd spent the better part of the morning and afternoon doing a lot of contemplating about her past, her present, and what she wanted in her future. She'd thought she'd had it all figured out—what she wanted out of life and what direction it was heading—but that was before she'd met Alex and he'd added a new, more emotional dimension to her existence.
She still didn't have any concrete answers, just those damnable fears that wouldn't leave her alone. The fear of letting go of all she'd held on to for so long, and trusting in Alex and all he was offering her. The fear of losing him for good if she refused his proposal. And the one fear she'd never expected would make itself known: could she be the kind of woman Alex deserved and needed for the rest of his life?
It was a legitimate concern, and one she had to explore deeper—for herself, and Alex, too. And because there was no better time than the present, she decided to try and find some answers to that question lying heavily on her heart.
She glanced Alex's way and found him already staring at her, his blue-eyed gaze warm and genuine and as real as his feelings for her. He was still holding her hand, the simple connection between them intimate and caring and just what she needed the most right now.
"What's on your mind, sweetheart?" He delivered the same question she'd asked him last night, proving that he knew how to gauge her moods pretty darn well, too.
She smiled and ducked her head. "I think there's too much on my mind," she admitted, then looked back up at him and forged ahead with what she needed to know. "Why have you stayed with me for the past year?"
She certainly hadn't made it easy on him, at least not emotionally. It had taken her much longer to admit her feelings to him, and looking back she was shocked that he'd been so patient with her.
Which made her question, and his answer, all the more important.
Alex kicked at the surf foaming at his feet as he mulled over his reply, knowing he couldn't sum up his response in one easy sentence. "Let's see," he mused, and cast her an amusing smile. "There's you being beautiful and sexy and having a great ass, which was the first thing that turned my head."
Her cheeks flushed a pretty shade of red. "Nice to know you're a typical male," she murmured wryly.
"Oh, yeah." He laughed and winked at her. "But you'll be glad to know that I quickly learned that beneath that incredible beauty of yours, and our instantaneous chemistry, you're witty and intelligent and feisty, as well as dedicated and successful and self-assured. It's a combination that intrigued me from the first and kept me coming back for more."
As he extolled all the qualities he admired about her, he found it ironic that the confidence and independent attitude he was initially attracted to was now one of the main issues that stood between them and a future together.
He stopped and turned toward her, wanting to make sure he had her full, undivided attention for what he was about to say next. "Then I fell in love with you, all of you, good and bad, and that's the first time any woman has ever ensnared me so completely."
With a gentle caress, he brushed back the strands of hair fluttering against her cheek from the breeze and stared deeply into her eyes. "You're amazing, Dana, in so many ways." And he wanted her to realize that for herself. Accept it. Believe it.
"Oh, wow," she breathed.
He'd obviously given her more than she'd bargained for, but considering their relationship was at stake, he wasn't going to hold anything back. And he hoped she'd give him the same in return.
He slid his palms down her sun-kissed arms until he was holding her hands once again. "Now it's my turn for a few questions."
She peered at him cautiously, but didn't shut him out or try to dissuade him. "All right."
He saw her acquiescence as a positive sign. "I want to know why it's so important to you to be so disciplined and in control, of your feelings, your surroundings, and even us."
She glanced away, toward the ocean, but not before he saw the show of guilt pass over her features.
Touching his fingers to her chin, he brought her gaze back to his, refusing to let her withdraw now that they'd come this far. "Tell me why you're afraid of letting anyone get too close, and why you have such a hard time depending on anyone other than yourself, for anything. And I know your reasons go a hell of a lot deeper than being focused on building your career, so don't use that as an excuse to hide behind."
When she didn't answer, he knew he'd hit a sensitive nerve. He squeezed her hand encouragingly and continued. "Make me understand at least that much, Dana." Because all those questions he'd brought up were issues she'd kept private and locked away. And he suspected her explanation was the key to their future.
Now, it was a matter of her trusting him with the truth.
She moved away from him and he let her go. A few steps later she picked up a shell that had washed up on the shore and rubbed her thumb over the smooth surface before glancing over her shoulder at him. "I know I've never told you much about my past, or how I grew up, and that's because it's something I'd rather forget."
"Tell me now, Dana," he urged gently.
She inhaled a slow, deep breath. "Being an only child, and with my parents being divorced by the time I was ten, I didn't have the kind of family life you did, with parents and siblings who were supportive and loving and always there for you, so it makes it easy to depend on them if you need something."
He had to admit that he was very fortunate in that regard. Even though his own mother had died when he was just a boy, and he and his siblings had experienced a few difficult years after that loss, they'd at least had their father and each other to turn to. Apparently, Dana hadn't had anyone to offer her that unconditional love and support when she'd needed it the most.
"Soon after my parents' divorce was finalized, my father married a younger woman, which completely devastated my mother," she went on, and shook her head in annoyance as they started strolling along the beach again. "She was at such a loss without my father, since she'd spent over ten years being completely devoted to him. She'd been a stay-at-home wife, very passive and always trying to please my father, to the point that I was sometimes an afterthought. She'd also depended on him for everything, and once she was on her own she didn't know what to do, or how to support herself."
Her lips flattened into a thin line, her frustration over her mother's inability to stand on her own two feet obvious. "So, instead of getting a job or trying to better herself, she found another man to take care of her, and when that didn't work out, she found another. It became a vicious cycle, and it got to the point that whenever she said she wa
s in love, I'd cringe because I knew it was all so superficial and just a matter of having a man around to rely on."
Alex listened quietly, intently, knowing there was more and wanting to hear it all.
With a sigh, she threaded her fingers through her tousled hair before speaking again. "As I grew older, I learned to equate that emotion with being weak and vulnerable and dependent. Mainly, on a man. It's what I saw with my mother on a regular basis and lived with until I graduated from high school, and by that time I swore I'd never put myself in the kind of position my mother had."
So much clicked into place for Alex, especially a greater understanding of Dana's driven, strong-willed personality and why she felt the undeniable need to be so disciplined and in control of everything in her life. Including their relationship.
"You're nothing like your mother," Alex assured her. "And you know me well enough to realize that I'm not anything like the men in her life, or that I'd ever ask you to give up anything for me."
When she made no reply, he pressed his advantage. "Another thing I know with certainty is that what you feel for me isn't anything superficial. And maybe that's what scares you so much, because real love means laying yourself bare and believing that the person you care so deeply about will always be there for you, no matter what, and making that leap takes a bigger amount of trust than walking away with your heart and emotions intact."
She gave him a wavering smile. "You're right," she whispered.
And he hated that he was. "So I guess the biggest issue that remains between us is you trusting in me. In all ways. Physically and emotionally, and with your heart and soul."
And tonight, he planned to put her to the ultimate test.
Chapter Five
Wearing a sexy black cocktail dress, and ready for her evening with Alex, Dana headed out of the suite's bedroom, only to find the living room empty and Alex gone. She frowned, then caught sight of a single long-stemmed red rose on the coffee table, along with a folded piece of stationery with her name on it.
Recognizing Alex's handwriting, she picked up the note and read what he'd written inside: Meet me down in the hotel bar. Love, Alex.
Curious, and more than a little intrigued to find out what kind of game Alex was playing, she took the elevator to the main floor, then headed into the hotel bar, named the Lobby Lounge. Once inside, she glanced around, searching for her date.
He was nowhere to be found.
The establishment was spacious, with a large bar, intimate sitting areas, and live musical entertainment. Dana went ahead and chose a vacant table and sat down to wait for Alex to join her.
A waitress came by to take her order; Dana smiled at the young woman and told her that she was waiting for someone, and she'd order a drink when he arrived. With a nod, the waitress moved on to another table.
Ten minutes later the woman returned and placed a drink on the table in front of her. Before Dana could tell her she'd made a mistake, the woman grinned and spoke first.
"The drink is from that good-looking guy at the bar dressed all in black," the waitress told her, and pointed out which man she was referring to.
Dana glanced past the woman, prepared to refuse the drink, until she saw Alex sitting on a barstool. Sure enough, he was dressed in a black shirt and pants, and he looked sexy as hell.
He grinned like a rogue and raised his own glass to her in a silent toast, then downed the rest of the contents.
She stared at him in stunned disbelief, trying to figure out his angle, along with his pretense of being a stranger buying her a drink—which she admittedly found to be an exciting and potentially erotic prospect with Alex.
When Dana took too long to formulate a response, the waitress came to her own conclusions about her silence. "I'm sorry. Did you want me to tell him you refused the drink?"
Dana immediately shook her head. "No, I'll take it," she said, and glanced back at the cocktail Alex had sent her, which didn't look like anything she'd ever had before. "What kind of drink is this?"
Amusement glimmered in the other woman's eyes. "It's called a Screaming Orgasm," she said before heading back to the bar to pick up another drink order.
Dana nearly groaned at that, and gave Alex credit for being so innovative—with the drink and this seductive adventure of his.
Deciding to play along and have fun with the fantasy, Dana raised her glass and acknowledged Alex with a sultry smile. She mouthed the words "thank you" before taking a drink of the creamy, sweet-tasting drink, recognizing the rich, smooth flavors of amaretto, Irish cream, and vodka.
After that initial first sip, she slowly licked her lips and coyly touched her fingers to the swells of her breasts above the low-cut neckline of her dress. Her nipples hardened in response, and she let her lashes fall half-mast, in a way that told Alex just how hot and aroused all this role-playing was making her.
For the next half hour they flirted back and forth from a distance, teasing one another with their eyes and body language, and heightening the desire and anticipation building between them.
Her waitress came by again, blocking Dana's view of Alex.
"That guy is really hot for you," the other woman said with a speculative raise of an eyebrow. "You're a lucky girl. There have been at least three women that have tried to get his attention, but he's not interested in anyone but you." With that, she presented Dana with a sealed envelope. "He asked me to deliver this to you."
"Thank you," Dana murmured.
As soon as the waitress left her table and Dana was alone once again, she opened the envelope and pulled out the contents—a keycard to their suite, and another note, which she unfolded and read.
I want you. In my bed. In my heart. In my future. Come to my room for an evening filled with erotic pleasures and forbidden desires. If you dare.
Dana's heart pounded hard and fast in her chest, seemingly rendering her breathless as she glanced back toward the bar—only to find Alex gone. He'd set the stage for an elaborate seduction, as well as her emotional and physical surrender, but he was leaving the decision to take this provocative fantasy to the next level up to her.
Oh God, could she do this and give Alex what she knew this night would mean to him? She realized she was at a crossroad in her relationship with Alex and had to make a choice that would irrevocably change the course of her life after tonight. She could either trust in Alex with everything she was, or she could end this dare of his right now and end up alone.
Possibly forever.
It was that thought that frightened her most of all. A life without Alex in it.
Their discussion this afternoon filtered through her mind, and she knew this was where she had to make that leap of faith and trust in Alex, to give herself over to him in all ways and hold nothing back. Because there was no doubt in her mind that Alex would be in charge of tonight's seduction, and she'd be his willing slave. In all ways.
Minutes later she was standing in front of their suite door, smiling at the DO NOT DISTURB sign Alex had already put out for the housekeeper. Obviously, he planned to keep her very busy—tonight through tomorrow morning.
Without hesitating, she used the key card and stepped inside the adjoining living room. The suite was dark, except for a soft glow of light beckoning her to the bedroom. Setting her purse down, she headed in that direction and found Alex reclining in a chair in the corner of the room, waiting for her to arrive.
His long legs were stretched out in front of him, crossed at the ankles, and his hands were clasped loosely in his lap. A slow, lazy smile eased up the corner of his mouth. "You came." His voice, deep and low, sounded very pleased.
She stopped by the bed, facing him, feeling his hot eyes on her from across the room. "You knew I would."
"There was always the possibility that you'd decided this isn't what you wanted," he said meaningfully. "You and I both know there's nothing safe about tonight, and what I'm asking is a big risk for you."
"And what risk is that?" she asked i
mpetuously. "Sex with a stranger?"
He chuckled. "That, and submitting to my wishes and desires." He waved a hand toward the four-poster bed, which had been turned down for the evening.
Her gaze shifted in the direction he'd indicated, taking in the props he'd laid across one of the pillows. A satin blindfold. Cream satin restraints. And a black feather tickler. She shivered at the thought of how he planned to put all those items to good use.
"Are you willing to take tonight as far as I want it to go?" he asked, bringing her attention back to him. "Are you prepared to do as I say and give me whatever I ask for?"
Her pulse quickened, sending a melting warmth swirling toward her quivering belly, and lower, between her thighs. This was it. The culmination of their weekend together. No more hiding from him or her own feelings. She was about to give him complete control and power, over her body, her heart, her emotions. Her very soul.
And she was ready to do so. Without reservation. Without fear.
"I'm yours to command, any way you wish."
A satisfied light burned in his gaze. "Then remember this. No touching unless I say you can. Now take off your shoes, then your dress."
After slipping both of her strappy heels off, she slowly skimmed one shoulder of her dress down and off her arm, then the other, exposing her bare breasts since she hadn't been wearing a bra. Her nipples were already tight and aching, and she hooked her fingers into the rest of the fabric and shimmied it over her hips and let it fall to the floor at her feet, leaving her clad only in a pair of skimpy black panties.
"Very nice," he murmured appreciatively. Standing, he took off his own shirt and tossed it aside as he closed the distance between them, his features bold and masculine and breathtakingly sexy.
She only had a handful of seconds to admire his broad shoulders and well-toned chest before he slid his hand around to the nape of her neck and tipped her face up to his. He slanted his mouth across hers, kissing her with an intensity and primitive hunger that branded and possessed. She whimpered, wanting to touch him all over, and had to force herself to obey his request to keep her hands to herself.
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