by Leila Lacey
“I am sorry. This is a lot!” Shelby said finishing off her glass of wine.
“Ok, well pull it together. I need your help,” Cassidy said starting to cry again.
“Ohhh, Cass, I am sorry. I am here for you, honey. Can I ask you something?” Shelby paused and waited for Cassidy to answer. When she nodded in agreement, Shelby said, “Why did you have the abortion?”
Cassidy cried for at least ten minutes and Shelby sat with her soothing her, sniffing and pulling herself together enough to explain. “When we almost lost you, I was devastated and Lance and Greyson were struggling, too. We all supported each other; probably not in the most healthy ways. Well, Greyson and I started seeing each other. I think I love your brother, Shel. But then he said he was thinking of going back to his wife. I was broken, so I leaned on Lance; one thing lead to another and we ended up having sex a few times. When I found out I was pregnant, I was going to keep the baby but then I saw Grey out the day his divorce was final. He said that he found out neither of the girls were his and how he could never love a woman with another man’s child; not as a forever kind of thing. I panicked, Shel. I really want to try and see if things can work with Grey! But I know he would not give me a chance pregnant with Lance’s baby. Besides that, Lance really cares for YOUR sister, why I do not know, but he does and I do NOT want HER to be a child of mines step-mother. Are you kidding me?” Cassidy finally stopped talking and blew her nose.
“Ok, so what you are saying is, I had an accident and everyone started fucking everyone and falling in love. Now you have had an abortion, Savannah is MIA and blackmailing your mother and my momma possibly put a bullet in my father’s ass,” Shelby said. “Cassidy, I know that neither of us are religious women. But we are both spiritual and I know that the abortion decision was not made lightly. But don’t you think that you should have at least told Lance you were pregnant? And do you have any idea how my brother feels about you?”
“Well, if you want to put it in simple terms, yes,” Cassidy said turning toward Shelby. “What am I going to do about Savannah?”
“You’re asking me? In all the years that you have known me have you ever known me to know how to deal with Savannah?” Shelby said to her. Cassidy threw her hands in the air and jumped up off the couch and started to pace.
“Cass, when was the last time you talked to Grey?” Shelby said.
“I don’t know, why?” she said in an irritated tone.
“Hey! Don’t bring it here. This is your fucked up shit. Because you need to find out if the man you killed a baby for thinks of you in the same way!” Shelby said yelling at Cassidy.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry I should not have spoken to you like that,” Cassidy said. “I know you are right. I am just… just... scared I guess, that he won’t want me,” she finished. Sitting down on the couch, Cassidy put her head in her hands.
“Cass, you are the most up-front and confident woman that I’ve ever known. Grey is the most honest and kind man you can ask to be in love with. Go to him and talk to him. You need to know if things will really go as bad as you think if Savannah tells Lance and Grey about the baby.”
Cassidy wrapped Shelby in a bear hug rocking back and forth. “I love you, I love you, I love you and I am so glad you are my best friend,” Cassidy said
“Cass, stop kissing me! Your mouth has been on dicks of men I know and that just nasty!” Shelby said wiping her face off.
“Oh! Shel, I have one more favor I need to ask. I know that I have dumped a lot on you today but I need this one last thing, pretty please?” Cassidy said
Sigh. “Oh Lord! What?” Shelby said scared to wonder what she was going to say.
“You cannot tell anyone about the abortion. Not even Logan,” Cassidy said. “At least not until I know what is going to happen with Grey. Then I will tell him myself.”
“Cass, Lance is my male version of you and Logan is his brother. I can’t lie to them especially about something like this,” Shelby said.
“I know, I am not asking you to lie, just don’t volunteer the information. Please, please, Shel. I just need a little time and then I promise I will tell him myself,” Cassidy said to her. Shelby thought about it for a minute. She knew that if it came out that she knew about the abortion and lied to him about it Logan or Lance, for that matter, would never forgive her.
“Alright, Cass, but I will not lie. If this comes out and either of them asks me, I won’t lie for you. But I won’t volunteer the information either,” Shelby said.
“Thank You! Thank You, Thank You!” Cassidy said. “OUCH,” she yelled after Shelby slugged her in the arm. Rubbing her arm and looking at Shelby like she had lost her mind, she said, “What was that for?”
“For fucking my brother!” Shelby said laughing. They both laughed together while Cassidy rubbed her arm and said, “Well, what had happened was….”
CHAPTER 6
Shelby was on her way into the hospital to see her father when her cell phone rang. “Hello,” she said.
“Hello, Shelby is that you?” Mr. Brownstone said.
“Yes, it is, Mr. Brownstone. Is Mother ok?” Shelby said stopping in her tracks. She would not be able to take it if something happened to her mother right now. They had gotten so close in the last few months and she would be devastated if she lost her to prison or, God forbid, death. She still could not get her mother to talk to her about what had happened that night. She had tried just last night and Sarah had been adamant it was her.
“Shelby, I know this is hard for you, sweetie, but it was me. I shot your father. After all the years of lies and betrayal and...” Sarah had stopped short like there was still something that Shelby did not know. Shelby had found out the hard way that was highly possible.
“And what, Momma?” Shelby asked her.
“Nothing baby, never mind. How would you like a mint julep?” Sarah had said starting to walk toward the kitchen.
“FREEZE” Shelby yelled at her mother. “I swear I think that everyone in this family are liars and crazy people. I do not want a drink; I want to know what really happened and why you are saying that you shot Daddy and who actually shot him!” she finished, yelling.
“Excuse me, young lady! You had better watch your mouth and your tone! I am still your mother and I will not have you being disrespectful,” Sarah said angrily.
“I am sorry to be disrespectful, Momma but I want to know the truth. So I will ask you again, and what, Momma?’ Shelby had said determined not to be deterred in her path of finding out the truth
“ABUSE!” Sarah had yelled. “Abuse. There, are you happy now? Your father hit me from time to time. The night of his incident, he hit me again and I had enough and I shot him,” Sarah finished with her voice cracking in pain as she spoke.
“Hitting you?” Shelby had said sitting down in a chair. “What do you mean ‘hitting you’? Momma, Daddy was abusing you too?”
Taking a deep breath, Sarah went and sat next to Shelby rubbing her hands “I am so sorry to upset you, baby girl. He did from time to time. But your daddy is a good man. He has demons, baby. Demons I cannot tell you about but I know he did not mean any harm,” Sarah said to her
“MOMMA! How can you say that?? HE has demons? What about the demons he is creating? Momma, you are about to go on trial for Daddy’s attempted murder. He hit me and he kept Greyson’s mother from him until it was too late. Demons, Demons? Momma, Daddy has more than demons. Daddy is a bonfire devil!” Shelby yelled. Sarah had started to cry. Shelby had felt so guilty she had just let it go. “Don’t cry, Momma, I am so sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you,” she had said wrapping her mother into her arms.
Coming back to the present, Shelby heard Mr. Brownstone say, “No, Shelby, she is not. I have been trying for weeks to get your mother to tell the truth of what happened the day of the shooting and she won’t. Now the District Attorney is offering to let her plead to second degree attempted murder and serve eight years in prison. Someone from the prosecutor’s
office called her directly and she accepted the deal.”
“WHAT? They can’t do that, can they?” Shelby said sitting down on the bench that was in the small sitting area in the front of the hospital.
“No, they can’t. I can take care of that. But the fact that your mother wants to fire me if I tell them she is not taking the deal; that is the problem,” Mr. Brownstone said. Shelby rested her head in her palm. This was all beginning to be too much and it was starting to piss her off.
“I know I can be disbarred for this but I frankly am too damn old to care at this point,” Mr. Brownstone started. “Shelby, your daddy has had a cocaine habit for years. Recently his dealer has attempted to blackmail him. Now I do not know if that has anything to do with what happened to your daddy but I am willing to bet dollars to doughnut it does. Your momma is too fine a lady to take the blame for something she didn’t do,” he finished. ‘Mr. Brownstone is downright hysterical,’ Shelby was thinking. She had never known him to raise his voice, let alone lose his temper. “Calm down, Mr. Brownstone, Momma will not being firing you and she will not be taking a deal. I will talk to Momma. Don’t worry,” Shelby said still resting her head in her hand.
“Well then, I guess that is all I have to say. Except, I guess it’s ok to tell you that I have loved your mother for years and when all of this is settled and your momma has started her divorce, I intend to date your mother if she will have me,” Mr. Brownstone said.
In her head, Shelby was thinking, “EWW… pineapples.” What she said was, “Well Mr. Brownstone, Momma would be lucky to have you.”
*******
“Baby, you home?” Logan yelled letting himself into the house. Things had been so hectic at all the shops today, he was exhausted. He had spent more time on the phone and in the car than working on the bikes. Logan missed getting his hands dirty. The shops were doing so well being right on a popular biker route. He spent more time being a business man than being a mechanic. All he wanted to do was eat dinner, spend some time with Gia and spend that rest of the night making love to Shelby and talking until the sun came up. He missed her so much. He had not seen her in three days other than to kiss her while she was sleeping as he fell into bed next to her at night.
“Baby? Gia?” Logan said checking the living room and the kitchen. When he stepped out onto terrace in the back yard, he noticed a piece of paper on the picnic table. Figuring it was a note telling him where they were, he picked it up. As Logan read the paper, he felt like someone had gut punched him. It was an aftercare form from an abortion clinic in Randsville, GA just outside of town.
Shelby was pregnant? She had an abortion? She killed their child together? Why? How could she do this? He thought they were happy? She was such a wonderful mother to Gia. Why wouldn’t she want a child of her own? Or was it his child that she didn’t want?”
Feeling like he was going to throw up, he pulled his cell out of his pocket and called Lance. If there was any time that he needed his twin, it was now.
“Hello,” Lance said
“Get over here,” was all Logan said.
“Well, hello Logan. How are you? What can I do for you?” Lance said to his brother.
“Shelby had an abortion” Logan said.
“Are you at the shop?” was all that Lance said this time.
“No, I am at the house,” Logan said before hanging up the phone.
While Logan waited for Lance to get there, he drank five beers and two whiskey neat’s. Sitting in the living room, Logan marveled at the level of deception that Shelby was capable of. It had been last week she had laid in his arms. They had talked about a little of everything but the thing that stood out to him was what Shelby had said to him.
“Logan, do you think that you will ever want to get married? To me?”
Logan had tilted her head up to look at him to make sure that she could see the sincerity in his eyes when he said, “Shelby, you and Gia are my world. I would do anything for you. I just want to get a few more things straight before I make you my wife. You do understand, don’t you?”
“Of course, I just want you to know how much I love you and what an honor it would be for me to be your wife and Gia’s mother,” she had whispered to him. ‘I thought I knew you,’ he was thinking standing in the middle of the home he had created for them to have and raise a family together. ‘I thought you understood.’
The thought of another child of his dying such a terrible death sent Logan into a rage and he started to knock things off tables, kick furniture across the room and break mirrors and art that was on the walls. He was destroying the house. Why not? Shelby had already killed his family.
*******
“Momma, I have ice cream?’ Gia said to Shelby as she walked up the walk-way from the car to the house. Although Shelby loved to hear Gia call her ‘Momma’, she was still getting used to it. Realizing how good it felt to have Gia call her ‘Mom’ Shelby thought of Cassidy. While she knew that Cassidy had made her choices, she still felt bad for her. That was something she was going to have to live with for the rest of her life.
“Yes, baby, you can have a scoop of ice cream tonight if you eat all your dinner. Ok?” Shelby said turning the knob to walk in the house. Gia was talking to her but Shelby was not hearing her as she looked around the house that was in total destruction and she started to panic. Were they robbed? Was Logan ok? His car was in the driveway but there was no sign of him.
“LOGAN, LOGAN!” Shelby shouted as she sat Gia down on the sofa and started to look around the house for him. Just then Lance came into the house from the back yard. “Shel, calm down, Logan is fine,” he said
“Where is he?” Shelby said starting to walk toward the back door. “What happened…?” before Shelby could finish her sentence, Logan stepped into the house. One look at him and Shelby could tell that he was drunk.
“You heartless bitch!” Logan said to her in slurred speech. Lance grabbed him to keep him from falling over telling him to calm down.
“Excuse me? What did you just say to me?” Shelby said feeling the sting of Logan talking to her that way, drunk or not down, to the tips of her toes.
“You heard me! You are a spoiled, rich, heartless bitch! I regret the day I ever met you!” Logan yelled his words so slurred she almost couldn’t make them out.
“Logan, you have one more time to call me a bitch and I am going to show you what a bitch I can be!” Shelby yelled back at him.
“Alright!” Lance said “Logan, shut up and let me talk for a minute. Shel, he knows.”
“He knows what?” Shelby said angrily crossing her arms over her chest.
“About the baby,” Lance said.
“I KNOW YOU KILLED MY BABY!” Logan shouted standing up too fast and being forced to sit right back down before he fell down.
“I WHAT?” Shelby said. She had no idea what they were talking about and she was really starting to get pissed off that Logan could even think something like that about her.
“He found the follow-up papers from you having the abortion. Shel, why didn’t you come to me?” Lance said to her with such sadness and a pinch of betrayal in his voice. Shelby could not be mad at him.
“Abortion? What abortion?” Shelby said. Then she remembered that Cassidy had come over to talk to her after the follow-up appointment and taken some things out of her purse and sat them on the table. She must have missed picking those forms up. Then she remembered that she had promised Cassidy that she would not tell anyone; including Logan.
“You think I had and ABORTION?” Shelby yelled at them both.
“YEAH, YEAH I THINK YOU DID IT!” Logan yelled back from his seat.
“Shel, I do not know what to believe. Are the papers real?” Lance asked her.
“Of course, they’re real!” Logan yelled standing up again. “Little Miss Rich Bitch can’t have my baby. I am not in the right “class” to be her husband and the father of her children. I don’t have enough money in the bank as if I would want any me
mber of such a disgusting family to be my wife,” he finished slurring every single word that came out of his mouth. With tears streaming down her face, Shelby turned to go upstairs to pack her things and move back home. She could hear Logan yelling at her to come back and deny it; to come back and tell him to his face that she had not killed his baby. She could also hear Lance trying to calm him and Gia to calm down because she had started to cry. Shelby hoped that she would be ok, thinking of the name that Gia had called her on her way into the house and started to cry hysterically. She loved that little girl as her own and walking away from her was going to be the hardest thing she ever had to do. How could Logan think such a thing about her? How could he think that she would be so cold as to kill their child after the terrible loss of the first baby? ‘He just told you how, stupid’ Shelby thought. She was now, and will always be, a “rich bitch” to Logan. That was unacceptable for Shelby and heart breaking; Shelby realized that Logan’s demons were always going to come between them. He could not accept that she came from a wealthy background and she refused to keep apologizing for her families’ heritage. After packing most of her personal items and deciding she would send someone for the rest of her things that she had moved in, Shelby grabbed her suitcase and headed down stairs.
“Just gonna slink out like the killer you are?” Logan said venomously from a dark corner in the living room. Looking around, Shelby did not see Gia and Lance, he must have taken her to her room to be out of the line of fire of Logan and his anger. Placing her key on the table and straightening her back, Shelby said, “I am not slinking anywhere, Logan. Here is your key.” She put his key in a decorative dish that was on top of the credenza.
Just as Lance walked back into the room, Logan stood up saying, “was it someone else’s?”
“WHAT? AWW SHIT!” Shelby and Lance said at the same time.
