Their wedding day consisted of her sister, his best friend, and a mayor. They couldn’t afford a big wedding and she’d convinced herself she was okay with that, but the truth was she missed not having a full-blown affair. The flowers, music—she even missed having the poufy gown to trip over.
They’d hinted at getting married and one night got caught up in the romance of a spontaneous marriage. With her mother in England and Nate’s parents away on a cruise to nowhere, Nikki and Nate went with it and settled on dinner at a small Italian restaurant that night. Garlic bread and pasta was all she had as a remembrance of her special day. Did she resent him? They had been in love and she’d convinced herself that it didn’t matter. Being together was all she’d wanted.
She focused on the wail call of a loon on the lake. A walk through the trails was inviting, but she had to get things done. She looked down at Nate as sweat glistened on the nape of his neck and his white T-shirt plastered to his back, his ever-ready blue bandanna hanging from his jeans pocket. All she could see was the man she’d married and promised to love forever.
Could it be me? She wasn’t any good at handling more than one disaster at a time. Maybe she was too demanding. The inn and the never-ending upkeep was getting in the way of her marriage. Maybe she was rash to ask for a divorce, but she couldn’t think of any other way to get through to him.
She shook her hands as if shooing away an annoying gnat. “Gotta go. Gotta go.” She rose from the window seat then paused by his side of the bed and smoothed out a wrinkle on his pillowcase.
Crash! She spun around toward the noise and ran to the hallway.
“Sorry, Nikki. I’m a clumsy sort.” Albert stood over the shattered water pitcher.
She forced down the lump in her throat. “No worries. I’ve been meaning to move it forever.” She hadn’t—she loved the lightly faded and slightly cracked, now-demolished decoration. She’d picked it up on one of her yard sale hunts in an attempt to add her personal touch to the place.
Albert bent down to help. With his heavy breathing, she worried that he would pass out or worse. How would that look in the local paper? Guest at The Loon Lake Inn Drops Dead Hours Before Wedding.
“That’s fine. I’ll get it. It’s no big deal.” She scooped up the large pieces and kicked the smaller debris against the baseboard.
“I’m really sorry. I was looking for Agnes.”
“She’s walking the grounds with Noelle. Why don’t you go look for her? I’m sure she wouldn’t mind if you joined them.” She forced a smile and went downstairs.
It was like having her grandparents underfoot, always wandering off and touching things. He followed her and she opened the door to let him out—free to look for his wife and away from any more fragile pieces. The grandfather clock chimed twelve.
Where’d the morning go? She hadn’t thought she’d been upstairs so long. Her chest flushed and her breathing quickened. Damn.
Nate always complained how she waited to the last minute to get things done. The inn was about quiet and relaxation. No more pity party of one. She rushed downstairs. Enough stalling.
She slipped behind the lobby desk and Todd ran up to her waving his hands in the air.
“Eww, you reek. What did you fall into? You okay?” She backed away.
“There’s a guest in my truck named Tara Graham whose car had a run-in with a bull.”
She handed him a bottle of water and wished him away. He was stinking up the lobby. And she’d worked hard to get the inn ready for the wedding.
A few minutes later, a woman was escorted to the lobby desk by the bride-to-be.
“Another guest, Tara Graham.” Viv smiled.
Nikki turned the guest book around and handed Tara a pen. “We like to make our guests feel welcome the minute they step foot in here.” Even though she had computerized the reservation process, she liked the intimate feel of using the guest book. She thought it helped retain the rustic atmosphere of the place.
Tara was reluctant to take the pen.
“Of course, if you’d rather not…”
“No, that’s okay.” Tara hesitantly took the pen and scribbled an illegible signature. “I just had a horrible encounter with a moose. I’m still shaken.”
Nikki suppressed a hearty laugh but it was hard not to smile. It wasn’t unusual for people new to the area to be startled when coming in contact with an animal as large as a moose.
She smiled. “Todd told me about your incident.”
“Yes. I’m just a bit shaken from the surroundings. I’ve never had so many trees around me.”
“Hmm, city girl?”
“Yes, and my trip out here wasn’t an easy one. She pushed back nonexistent glasses on top of her head.
Nikki checked the guest list in the computer. “You’re early but your room is ready. I’ll get someone to help you with your luggage.”
“That won’t be necessary. I don’t have much.”
“It’s taken care of,” Viv said from behind Tara.
“Enjoy your stay.”
There was something familiar about Tara. Nikki did a quick computer search and found pictures of Tara plastered on the Internet. Award-winning musician. Possible love triangle? No wonder Tara was so frazzled. “Well, the paparazzi definitely won’t find her here.” Nikki laughed.
* * *
“The gazebo is just about done. Wanna check it? The only thing needed is the light, which is coming tomorrow,” Todd called in through the lobby window.
“Be right there.” She grabbed a cracker. Her stomach was churning again, not enough to cause her discomfort but enough to be annoying.
She stepped out onto the open front porch. The rocking chair Todd had made was inviting but she was running out of time. Maybe later she could convince Nate to spend some time with her as the sun set. She smiled remembering back to the first night they took over as the new owners. When they’d made plans to make a life for themselves in the woods of Maine, away from the city. She’d convinced herself they could adapt to the country life. After all, she was familiar with the area and embraced the serenity of the woods. Having spent most summers there, it was like her second home. And she vowed to make the adjustment a seamless one for the family. Like she’d done many times in their marriage whenever the status quo was threatened, it was her who took care of making the impossible work. Nate wasn’t comfortable with change. No wonder he was content with the state of their marriage—she took care of everything and it was exhausting keeping his life carefree. This time was a challenge and she was tired but she wanted to pull it together.
Wooden barrels of yellow-and-purple wildflowers cuddled with Queen Anne’s lace lined the porch stairs and walkway. Nate had done a fantastic job raking up debris, which was a difficult feat considering the never-ending onslaught of tree litter and whatever paper, empty nutshells, or some other foreign items the animals decided to drag across the gravel walkway.
She stopped short of the gazebo and took in the structure and its surroundings. It was the perfect wedding setup. Todd had managed to age the new wood so it blended in with the old.
The rough Maine winters certainly took their toll on things.
She could picture the white tulle flowing along the outline of the canopy, adorned with white daisies and the sun’s rays beaming down, isolating the ceremonial area. She made a note to tell Noelle to hold off draping the material until Saturday. Today was too early to risk ruining the delicate fabric. Even though she liked to get things done early, it was better to wait this time.
“This looks wonderful. Thank you for taking care of this. I know carpentry wasn’t what you signed on for.”
Todd gathered up his hammer, handsaw, and nails. “No problem. I didn’t have any nature walks planned. Nothing until tomorrow morning.”
“Well, thanks anyway.” Nikki smiled and walked away. She could never spend too much time alone around Todd. He excited her in a way that made her feel sensual, and it was wrong. The knot in her stomach w
eighed heavily whenever he smiled at her. At times, she thought he’d paid more attention to her than just an employee. Nothing out of line, but she definitely sensed a connection. She thought she was attracted to him because he gave her the attention her husband didn’t. Either way, she didn’t want to come across as interested. She wasn’t about to exchange one complication for another.
She rambled off to a narrow path behind the gazebo. She looked back to make sure Todd wasn’t behind her. The sunlight faded as pine trees surrounded her and the gravel beneath her feet changed to dirt. Damn. Should have changed my shoes.
She hadn’t intended to wander off and her wedge sandals weren’t the best foot protection. A broken tree branch offered a place to rest. She rested her hand on her grumbling stomach, no longer nauseous but famished. I just ate. No, can’t be.
One, two…she counted off on her fingers.
She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Her shoulders fell with a heavy sigh. Impossible. One more thing to complicate her life.
A spruce grouse ran between her feet and startled her as she stood and the log heaved a bit. Brush rustled behind her. She held her breath. Holly branches moved. Bear? She released her breath slowly—the last thing she wanted to do was spook a wild animal. It sounded too subtle to be a moose. Please don’t let it be a momma moose with calves. She was still and waited for evidence of what stalked her. Please, please, please.
It came closer and every muscle in her body seized. I know I’m not religious, but…
“Nikki. Why are you out here all alone?” Agnes held on to a wicker basket filled with…well, she couldn’t make it out, but it could be anything. Someone’s car keys, beer cans, something someone threw away. The woods were filled with lost objects.
“Just checking the grounds.” She laughed at her silliness thinking it was a bear.
“Agnes, where are you?” Noelle yelled from the brush.
“We’re over by the abandoned trail,” Nikki yelled back. Gratitude filled her chest as the thought of being devoured by a bear left her. “We’ll meet you by the trailhead.”
She took hold of Agnes’s elbow and marched her out of the woods. Cars filled the parking area. Noelle caught up with them and shook her finger at Agnes. “I swear, if you take off on me like that again, I’ll never go fiddlehead hunting with you, especially if they’re in season.”
“Sorry, dear,” Agnes said.
“You scared me to death. Uh, Mom. Who’s watching the desk?” Noelle ran to the front porch.
That’s it. Pull yourself together. “Come on. You’re staying with me until your husband comes for you. I can’t have you wandering off in the woods while I have to work.”
She lovingly took the basket from Agnes and they strolled to the inn. She knew Noelle would handle any situation presented at the desk. She couldn’t figure out where her daughter inherited her instinct for problem solving but appreciated that she could help out.
“Oh—” She caught her breath as they walked into the lobby to find Nate behind the desk. He was talking to Albert and cut the conversation short when he looked up and saw Nikki.
“I’ve been looking for you. Can we talk?” He motioned for Noelle to man the reception desk.
* * *
Nate slipped his hand into hers and they strolled along the river rock path toward the duck pond. His touch felt foreign and distant to her, like they barely knew each other.
She pulled back “I really need…”
“Just give me some of your time.” He let go of her and slid his hands into his front jeans pockets.
“But I need to get back. There’s a lot going on today.” She wasn’t in the mood for an intense discussion and stepped back to leave.
“I’m taking a job.” He didn’t even turn around, just stared across the pond.
“You have a job.” If his goal was to get her attention, he succeeded.
“No, you have a job. This is yours. I seriously thought I could make a go of this but all it’s seemed to do is create another obstacle in our relationship.”
She couldn’t argue with him—she was all too aware of the wedge that kept widening the gap in their marriage. Even with that, he couldn’t up and leave. She remembered the night they found out he couldn’t return to work. Oh, he was offered a desk job, but that wouldn’t keep him happy. He tried it for a month and nearly crawled up the wall. No, he needed something that kept him moving and not confined to one spot all day. Together they’d thought that taking over the inn would give them the opportunity to be financially independent. They could pursue what made them happy. She could stay home and pick up her music again—she’d been away from it for too long and missed it. Nate would have the freedom to do whatever he wanted. Build things to keep his hands busy until he decided on something concrete. Noelle would have a safe place to grow up and be able to go outside without them having to worry about her whereabouts.
He turned to her, his hands digging deeper into his pockets. “Face it, Nikki. This isn’t working. I’ve tried to talk to you about it but you’re always lost in your own head.”
“I never meant to ignore you, it’s just…”
“Too easy.” He laughed. “I thought it was a blessing when you inherited this place. It was familiar. It came at a time when we needed it. I get it, but it’s not working for me.” He picked up a rock and skipped it across the pond. The next one made it all the way across. “Maybe this job offer came at a good time. It’ll give us time apart and give you time to see if you really want a divorce.”
She pulled back her shoulders and caught her breath. Damn. This was the first time he acknowledged her mention of ending their marriage. It had an entirely different sound to it when he said it. Doubt inched to the surface and she questioned her decision.
“Where’s the job?”
He hesitated. “California.”
Her chest tightened at the idea of him moving across the country. How could he up and leave their daughter? A divorce or separation was one thing, but moving three thousand miles was—
She grabbed a rock, ran her finger hard along the ragged edge, and lobbed it across the water.
“So you think that’s the answer? You’re miserable. Don’t you think that Noelle and I feel it? Don’t you think your mood infects the atmosphere of the house?” She picked up a larger stone but this time skimmed it with such force that it hardly broke the surface as it skipped away from her.
“Do you ever stop to think what I’m going through?” He lowered his voice to a tone she was more receptive to.
Nate had become too comfortable with snapping at her and she cringed every time he did it. She missed how she used to smile when he spoke. Maybe it’s me. She willed a wave of calm through her being. Breathe. Breathe. She released her breath as tension left her body. She’d give him a chance to have his say, even though it was hard for her to wait out his long-winded conversations.
“Fine. Talk.” She sighed.
“Can you at least pretend to be concerned?”
“Sorry. Just stressed over the wedding details.” She hoped the bride and groom wouldn’t be faced with the end of their marriage at some point in their lives.
He put his hands on her shoulders. She looked him straight in the eye.
“I get that, and I know this isn’t the best time to have this conversation, but you’re impossible to get to stay in one place…”
“Just busy.” She clenched her fists.
“I know that. I’m not undermining what you’re doing here, but this isn’t working the way we planned. I need something more to do. This isn’t cutting it for me. I don’t feel productive living like this. Do you understand that?” He shook her shoulders then let go.
Nikki relaxed her fingers and stepped back. Her eyes welled up. “I know it’s not.” She swiped away a tear. “Nothing about this is going right. The only one who’s okay with it is Noelle, and honestly I’m not a hundred percent sure about that. I’m sure she misses her friends and the malls,
but she doesn’t complain.”
“She always did seem smarter than us.” He grinned. She smiled. He was trying to lighten the situation that was beyond them.
“I don’t want to rush you, but can we get to the point?”
“Todd told me about a place he used to work for and gave me a contact and it turns out that I know the guy.” He dug his toe in the dirt and looked away from her. He could never look her in the eye when he expected her to lash out.
“Todd, huh?”
“Yep.”
“What’s the job?”
“Communication security.”
“What the hell does that mean?”
“It’s a company that monitors telecommunications.”
“What does that have to do with you?” Her eyes narrowed. “Is this a real job or are you looking for a reason to leave?”
He straightened his back. “Isn’t that what you wanted?”
Why did this have to happen now? He spent days avoiding her, even though he blamed her because she was the one who said she wanted the divorce. Typical Nate. Totally oblivious to his shortcomings but he sure remembered hers. “You know what? The only thing I want right now is to get this event going and over with.”
She turned her back to him.
“They want me there Monday.”
She folded her arms across her chest and dug her nails into her skin to quell the anger rising in her throat, and walked away.
She stopped with her back to him. “I have a question for you.”
“Go ahead.” She sensed he was still standing where she’d left him.
“Do you want a divorce?” Her tone was softer, but stern.
“I never said I did.” The sound of leaves being crushed faded as he walked back into the woods.
* * *
Nikki hadn’t intentionally ignored Nate since they’d spoke about his leaving the day before. Damn elevator crapped out and the last thing she’d needed was for that to not be working. It being the day before the wedding and night of the pre-ceremony, she had to step it up to get things done. Todd was quick to fix it and had Nate help him so that kept him busy that morning.
Timeless Vows: Five Tales of Love (Timeless Tales Book 4) Page 6
