Josh fucking Loyte is dead to me. Even in this inebriated state, his name is a spike through my crumbling heart. All that he represents is splattered with tainted ink.
He’s the beloved captain of our college football team.
Fraternity president.
Classically handsome.
Reigning beer pong champion.
My first serious boyfriend.
Oh, and an unfaithful piece of moldy trash.
There had been whispered rumors of him cheating on me before. Josh is often on the road and surrounded by temptation. But he never gave me reason to doubt his commitment. The calls and texts never hit a lull. He made sure the gossip didn’t hold an ounce of credibility. I’d been reinforced to put my trust in him, and our relationship.
Until today.
A twitch attacks my eyelid just recalling the sordid scene depicted for me this afternoon. Several of Josh’s teammates witnessed the flirting, kissing, dry-humping...every detail leading to the actual deed. Three years are tossed out the window for a quick piece of ass. Everything we shared—all of the highs, lows, and standstills—are proven worthless. He didn’t bother denying the claims of his infidelity when I confronted him. All that bastard had for me were hollow words that severed what little remained of my hope.
Rayne, baby. You didn’t really think we’d stay together after graduation, right?
I had, stupidly. Turns out I was the only one. Fool me once and all that. He’s responsible for giving me a whopping dose of jaded medicine. I won’t be so easily duped in the future.
But here I am, drowning my sorrows in a river of denial. Maybe if I drink enough, this horrible nightmare will turn out to be just that. I’ll wake up and everything will return to normal. That thought gives me pause. Is that what I really want? Suddenly I’m not so sure. It could be the cloud of booze talking.
I thought Josh would propose after graduation. We’d get married and buy an adorable little house. Spend our lives beside one another, growing old, and building endless memories. What a damn pipe dream. My love is shriveling faster than his reputation around campus. That’s one positive about this ordeal. Josh’s name is being dragged through the mud. Score for the underdogs.
The song changes to something slower and the man behind me disappears. Probably scouring the crowd for a more interactive partner. Good riddance.
“Rayne?”
I squint at the gravelly voice through one eye. This newcomer sounds better than chocolate wrapped in peanut butter. When my vision clears, I suck in a sharp breath.
Oh, shit.
It’s the hottie from my organic chemistry class. Pretty sure he’s been enrolled in several of the same courses. Not that I’ve been staring longingly or anything. The dim lighting conceals his green eyes that are the perfect shade of emerald. He always smells like fresh laundry and naughty fantasies. I jerk out of those unhelpful musings. They’ll only make my mouth water faster. He’s already so out of my league and here I am, three sheets to the wind.
“Hey, you.” I give him a wave of my fingers. It probably looks more like a sloppy flop.
“Seth,” he reminds.
“I know your name,” I grumble.
His smirk puts a wobble in my knees. “That’ll make this easier.”
A furrow squishes my brows. “Huh?”
“I heard about Josh,” he deflects.
“Good for you.”
“Well,” Seth drawls. “For what it’s worth, he’s a total wanker. I can’t believe he’d do that to you.”
“Salt in the wound,” I mutter. The floor tilts sideways beneath my unstable heels and I nearly topple over. I manage to straighten before going horizontal.
He squints at my tipping movements. “Are you drunk?”
Can he really blame me? I hold up a pinch between my thumb and forefinger. “I might’ve overindulged.”
“You think?” A dry chuckle escapes him.
I rub at the sudden ache spreading across my temples. “Isn’t that what I just said?”
“Are you staying much longer?”
“Uh,” I mumble. The muck in my brain struggles to keep up with his change in subject. With clumsy hands, I whip out my phone. The screen is way too bright and I hiss at the sting. “I dunno. It’s not even eleven. We have an hour to wait before the third happy hour kicks in.”
Seth mutters something unintelligible under his breath. I don’t bother trying to comprehend the string of nonsense. His gaze returns to mine. “Where are your friends?”
“Over there.” I blindly gesture to their usual booth against the wall.
“Can I walk you home?”
“Now?”
“Preferably.”
“Is that all you want to do?” The slur in my tone detracts from my accusation. Or is it meant as a suggestion?
“Yes, Rayne. Believe it or not, my intentions are decent.”
A pout threatens to push out my bottom lip. But that’s most definitely the alcohol’s influence. “I wasn’t accusing you.”
“Yet,” he adds.
“Are you going to give me reason to change my mind?”
“Never.”
“Most guys would take advantage.”
Seth combs through his blond hair. “Well, I’m not one of the masses.”
I give him a slow once-over. He’s everything Josh will never be. “No, you certainly aren’t.”
“Will you leave with me? You can sleep this off and wake refreshed. Alone, of course.”
My eyelids grow heavier the more he talks about leaving. Snuggling under my covers has never sounded so good. I find myself nodding while turning toward the exit. “Uh-huh, let’s go.”
Rayne
“That lying piece of shit.” I hurl another picture frame at the brick wall and get a sliver of satisfaction as the glass shatters. A sick sense of revenge shortly follows.
What’s not so delightful is the pounding that’s rattling my skull intensifying from the impact. This damn hangover is trying to ruin my closure. A headache is the least of my worries and won’t stop me. I palm another meaningless gift from my box of mementos from that asshole and prepare to take aim.
“That’s right, let it all out.” Audria’s soothing tone does little to cool the fire under my skin. My best friend has been watching my destruction for the better part of an hour. She deserves an award for her unwavering encouragement.
“Oh, I am. Josh will curse the moment his cock slid into someone else. And you know what else?”
She hums while tapping her chin. “There are so many—”
I don't give her a chance to finish before continuing my tirade. “He has a teeny weenie.”
Audria cackles at that crude confession. “I love this spiteful side of you.”
If I’m being honest, this toxic headspace is draining as hell. “I just need a solid ten minutes to freak out. Then I’ll be done.”
“Well, I’m here for it. Whatever you need.”
“Just a couple more hunks of junk.” I pitch the cheesy heart figurine still in my palm, smiling as it smashes into a cascade of red and pink smithereens.
“You’re ruthless,” she crows. “This is a gravesite of love gone wrong.”
I stare at the broken pieces that once held so much value. In the light of morning, reality sinks in heavier than a lead balloon. Josh cheated on me. It’s official. Nothing is changing that. I have to accept the truth and move on. No more denial or mourning the loss of my naive innocence.
Yesterday was spent moping around and licking my wounds. Now I’m letting anger slip behind the wheel. Tomorrow marks the beginning of a fresh outlook where Josh is a blip in the rearview. Hell, he won’t even exist in my future paradise.
“Love should never hurt like this. I’m thinking Josh didn’t care about anything except having a reliable lay.”
She frowns at me. “Don’t sell yourself short. Ever.”
I hold out my arms. “He already did that for me.”
“He de
serves a kick in the crotch,” she spits.
“And then some. I should’ve known. Half the football team has tried telling me for months, but I brushed them off.”
Her smile is kind, even in the face of this dank topic. “You chose to trust him.”
“Yeah, and look where that landed me. Does loyalty mean nothing?”
“It does to those that matter. Don’t let him get you down.”
“No, I’m not sad. Not anymore, at least. There’s a yuck factor that isn’t easy to scrub off. But I won’t give him reason to believe he’s missed. Come Monday, I’ll be better than ever.”
“That’s my girl,” Audria cheers. No wonder she’s becoming a teacher. She can root with the best of them.
I point at her, my chest growing tight with pressure. “This is why he lost interest in having sex. The last time we did was...I don’t even remember when. How sad is that? We’re supposed to be in our prime and I’m not getting laid.”
One of her shoulders bobs to a silent beat. “Maybe that’s a good thing. He was protecting you from potential STDs.”
Acid burns in my belly. “I don’t want to think of him being considerate for that reason. Lord knows he could use a few extra lessons in respect. I should’ve broken up with him last summer. What a manwhore.”
“Better to find out now,” she reasons.
I just...” My words trail off in a pitiful whine. “How could he do this to me?”
Audria pulls me in for a hug, rubbing my back. “He’s a dumb boy. Too busy playing with balls to grow up. He’s very immature and doesn’t deserve you.”
“That’s the standard response friends have to vibe in situations like this.” Defeat clings heavy in my voice.
“Not true. If you were full of it, I’d tell you so.”
I squint at her. “Yeah, you’re too honest.”
She shrugs again. “Almost to a fault.”
“If only that trait applied to those who truly need it.”
“What goes around,” she sings.
“He should be the one suffering,” I fume. “I want to punish that pile of worthless scum. He cheats on me? The one who’s been dutifully by his side for years? What the fuck, Auds?”
“He’s lost his marbles, obviously. We know this.”
I’m nodding along with her. “Yep, and he does it with that skanky whore everyone with a jersey bangs? She’s not even pretty!”
Audria grips my shoulder, offering all the moral support with that one touch. “Nothing but a homewrecker.”
A hitch warbles my exhale. This is getting too dark. If I don’t tread carefully, I’ll hit a point of no return. I’m making shit up based on this random girl’s social media uploads. Petty much? She deserves my wrath. Glaring at her pictures gives me a false outlet since she’s nothing but a stranger. For all I know, the girl thinks Josh is single and available for all the celebratory shenanigans. That fucker is a sweet talker. He can weasel his way into exclusive events without a word. I wouldn’t put it past him to lie smoother than a bearskin rug.
“No more cyber stalking,” she scolds. “That will only infect the site of injury.”
She’s right, as always. “I just wanted a little peek. Brent shouldn’t have told me her name to begin with.”
“We know he’s been hit in the head one too many times.” Audria mimics bouncing off the siding.
I laugh at her reenactment. “He probably meant well. That’s what I’m telling myself at least.”
“Always thinking the best of people. You’re such a good soul.”
“Yeah, well, hopefully karma is fighting in my corner.”
Her brown eyes sparkle. “I have a brilliant idea.”
“Glitter bomb? Yeah, I was thinking the same thing.”
She giggles. “I was going to say fire ants in Josh’s underwear drawer, but glitter might be worse.”
I rub my palms together. “Why not both?”
“That’s the spirit, lady boss. You show him who’s coming out on top.”
“No more taking shit lying down.” I slap a palm to my chest.
“You’re going to find someone so much better. He’ll treat you like a queen.”
I almost admit that a certain fellow snagged my attention last night. Seth is everything I’d be lucky to have in a boyfriend. But it’s far too premature for those ideas to be sprouting. For all I know, Seth was just being a decent guy and didn’t want to see me get into the wrong hands. There are more complications, too.
“The dirty laundry of my breakup is still hanging out to dry. I shouldn’t be thinking of other guys.”
Audria waves me off. “Oh, please. Rules of etiquette don’t apply when cheating is involved. Don’t let your happily ever after pass you by.”
When she puts it that way, it’s hard for me to resist. Or argue. “We’ll see.”
“Just be open to options.”
“I will, promise.”
“Yes, girl. Get your redemption.”
“Starting now,” I vow.
“And what about this?” She points to the mess scattering across our garage floor.
“I’ll get the broom. But creating all that wreckage has left me parched.”
Audria bounces on her toes. “Mimosas?”
“Always.”
I’m practically skipping inside at the promise of bubbles and citrus. Maybe I should pop in some toast, too. A loud knock interrupts my trek to the fridge. I stomp over to the foyer and fling open the door. That innocent knob of metal is next in line for taking the brunt of my frustration. If I was stronger, it might even creak under my efforts.
Familiar green eyes meet mine. I feel my lips part with a sputtering breath. Seth is at my house. Blurry snippets of last night filter in through the fog. He found me on the dance floor. I was a hot mess. We talked for a bit. He escorted me home while acting more regal than any version of a gentleman I’ve met. Before I could even consider inviting him in, Seth was saying goodnight with promises of seeing me soon. And now he’s back.
“Um, hi.”
“Breakfast?” He holds up two grease-stained bags.
My empty stomach grumbles. “Oh, my hero. It’s like you read my mind.”
“That’s quite a pleasant reception.”
“It’s been a rough morning,” I mutter.
His smile droops at the corners. “Is this a bad time?”
I shake my head, wincing at the dull ache. “No, no. Couldn’t be better. You’re a saint, swooping in at the right moment.”
“This is nothing.”
“Not to me.”
Seth’s signature smirk tilts his lips. “Well, it’s a good thing I’m just getting started.”
Seth
Rayne swallows the last bite of croissant with a groan. “And once again, that really hit the spot. You seem to have a hidden talent for delivering what I’m craving.”
The smile that slides onto my lips is natural. “Happy to oblige.”
“And provide,” she adds.
“Is that all right with you?”
“Do you hear me complaining?” She pats her stomach. “This habit of yours is becoming addictive.”
My grin tips higher. It’s been almost two weeks since my trial run at pursuing her. Since that first Sunday morning, I’ve found countless excuses to stop by her place or conveniently cross our paths. She’s been receptive to my advances, which only encourages me. “I’ll continue delivering breakfast so long as you keep opening the door, and make noises like that.”
Rayne lets another moan loose. Purely for my benefit, I assume. “Be careful or I might get used to this.”
“That’s the plan.” I begin gathering the trash in front of us.
A rosy hue stains her cheeks. “You’re spoiling me.”
“On purpose,” I murmur.
She drops her gaze from mine. “Why?”
The loss of her stare hits me harder than it should. “Isn’t it obvious?”
“Not to me. I’ve never been th
e type who jumps to conclusions.” Rayne shakes her head, biting her bottom lip.
No, she’s not. That’s one of the many things I appreciate about her. I’ve been playing the long game--far longer than intended. But this girl is worth the wait.
Since Rayne broke up with Josh, I’ve been watching him strut across campus as if he’s King fucking Arthur. What a douche. Doesn’t he realize who’s free from his clutches? Of course not because he’s holding his head so damn high that he can’t see what’s no longer in front of him. His major fuck up is absolutely my gain. It’s almost humorous how efficiently he fucked himself over. I couldn’t have plotted a better ploy myself.
After catching sight of Rayne Trent freshman year, I’ve been not-so-patiently biding my time for her to be single. If only I had made a move before Josh butted in and got his meaty paws all over her. That guy never deserved her. He’s a total fool, and I’ve never been more grateful for another person’s demise. Rayne’s connection to him has officially been axed.
I’ve been keeping tabs from afar, but now I’m stepping up to the plate. No more sidelines. This is the chance I need to prove she’s meant to be mine.
“Will you go somewhere with me today?” I hold up my palms. “Still no ulterior motives.”
Well, that’s not entirely true. But they’re genuine.
She relaxes further into her chair. “Oh, the fun isn’t stopping with food?”
“There’s more I’d like to offer, if you’re okay with that.” And hopefully this starts the beginning of something new.
Her nails tap on the table. “What did you have in mind?”
“The Rose Gardens,” I murmur.
Her gasp is the reaction I was going for. “Really?”
“Yeah, I wouldn’t joke about that. It’s a favorite of yours, right?” I’ve heard her talking about the latest designs in class. And she typically goes alone.
“Uh-huh, I would love that. Mallory is the only person I can convince to stroll the blooming displays with me. I don’t get it. Who doesn’t love flowers?”
“I’d be honored to take you.” That truth pulses through my tone with heavy beats.
I Have Lived And I Have Loved: A Charity Romance Collection Page 49
