He made her a bow and walked away.
It would remind her of . . . thought Elizabeth, recalling his enigmatic words.
What had Mr Darcy been about to say?
Chapter Seven
Elizabeth and Jane had much to talk over that night as they undressed for bed.
‘You seemed to enjoy yourself very much tonight,’ said Elizabeth.
‘Oh, Lizzy, is not Mr Bingley the most agreeable man you have ever met?’ asked Jane, her eyes shining.
‘I do not know, since I did not have a chance to say more than a few words to him. He was too busy dancing with you, or fetching you an ice, or talking to you!’ Elizabeth teased her.
‘Oh, Lizzy, for shame! We did not spend any more time together than was proper.’
‘But no less time, either.’
‘We seemed to have so much to say to each other. Never has someone else’s character chimed so perfectly with my own.’
‘You deserve all the happiness life has to offer,’ said Elizabeth. ‘I am very happy for you.’
‘Lizzy, what do you mean?’ asked Jane with a blush.
‘That he is falling in love with you,’ said Elizabeth.
‘You go too fast!’ Jane protested. ‘We have only just met.’
‘But time has very little to do with it,’ said Elizabeth. ‘It is possible to know a man for years and not have anything to say to him. Equally, it is possible to know a man for a very short space of time and be intrigued by him.’
As she spoke, she was not thinking of Mr Bingley, but of Mr Darcy.
She had been shocked to see him at the assembly . . . and then just as shocked to find that he was capable of being polite.
Despite her bad first impression of him, she had to admit that he could be agreeable if he chose, and his devotion to his sister won her respect. She loved her own sister dearly, and so she could understand his feelings in that matter.
‘I have promised we will call at Netherfield the day after tomorrow,’ said Elizabeth.
She told Jane everything Mr Darcy had said.
‘It reflects well on him,’ said Jane. ‘And I am sure I am willing to help his sister. She must feel very alone, with no mother or sisters to talk to.’
‘We will soon have her feeling more cheerful,’ said Elizabeth. ‘We must invite her here often. Perhaps some of Lydia’s high spirits will rub off on her!’
Jane gave a shudder. ‘Oh, not too much, I hope. I love our sister dearly, but there is no escaping the fact that she can be very embarrassing at times. She was laughing so loudly tonight, it drew attention, and Mr Bingley said he wondered that her parents did not do something about it. That was before he knew she was my sister, whereupon he apologised and said he liked to see young ladies enjoying themselves.’
‘I fear Lydia will never be made to behave. Mama encourages her, and Papa —’
She did not need to say any more. Elizabeth loved her father dearly, but he was lazy where his daughters were concerned, and he did not seek to correct them. He allowed Mary to continue on her own pompous way, and he did not try to curb Kitty’s frivolousness. Nor did he do anything to stop Lydia’s wild behaviour.
‘Never mind,’ said Elizabeth. ‘It would be too much to hope for, that I should have four sisters like you, Jane. I am just glad that I have one!’
She gave her sister a hug and jumped into bed.
Jane climbed into bed more slowly.
‘Still thinking of Mr Bingley?’ Elizabeth teased her.
Jane blushed.
‘Oh, Lizzy, I know it is foolish of me to like him so well, so quickly, but I cannot help thinking that he is everything I want in a young man.’
‘Then I am very pleased he moved into the neighbourhood,’ said Elizabeth.
‘And Mr Darcy?’ asked Jane. ‘Are you pleased he is here?’
Elizabeth’s brow darkened. As she blew out the candle she said, ‘That remains to be seen.’
Two days later, the ladies of Longbourn waited on the ladies of Netherfield Park. Mrs Bennet chaperoned her daughters to Netherfield and did everything in her power to further an attachment between Mr Bingley and Jane.
Elizabeth felt sorry for her sister. Mrs Bennet’s behaviour was very obvious and it was embarrassing. But Mr Bingley did not seem to mind. Indeed, he did not seem to notice. He was too busy looking at Jane.
Mr Bingley’s sisters noticed, however, and exchanged mocking glances.
Elizabeth blushed for her mother, but Mrs Bennet carried on singing Jane’s praises in a most obvious manner.
The one good thing about it was that it meant Elizabeth had a chance to speak to Georgiana without interruption, and when Georgiana invited Elizabeth to take a turn about the gardens, Mr Darcy said he would escort them. He then turned to Kitty and made a point of inviting her, too.
Luckily, Mary and Lydia were over by the pianoforte, Mary playing and Lydia laughing at her, so they did not ask to come along. Mr Bingley’s sisters were talking to Jane, and by the time Caroline Bingley realised what was afoot, it was too late for her to join Mr Darcy’s party as they were already halfway out of the room.
They walked through the magnificent hall, with its marble pillars and its black and white floor, and out of the imposing front door. The autumn sunshine fell on their faces and made it a pleasure to be out of doors. The gardens were looking very pretty. The bright colours of the summer flowers had given way to the darker oranges and golds of autumn, which were set off by the lush green foliage. Gravel paths ran through the gardens, leading across the lawns to fountains and avenues and smaller enclosed gardens.
‘It was a good idea to invite Kitty,’ said Elizabeth, as her small party walked along the paths, with the gravel crunching beneath their feet.
She and Mr Darcy were a little ahead of the two young girls, who were walking more slowly.
‘Yes. She is less wild than your other sister, and she is of an age with Georgiana. I hope the two of them will get on well together - you see, I have attended to you,’ said Mr Darcy with a bow.
‘Yes, you have,’ Elizabeth acknowledged.
There was something of a breeze, which was tugging at her bonnet, and so Elizabeth steered their steps to the rose garden. She had known Netherfield Park all her life and she knew the rose garden was enclosed and therefore sheltered.
They went through a pretty door in a high wall and the wind instantly dropped. Ahead of them were many flower beds where the roses still bloomed despite the lateness of the year. The walls held the heat and the lovely flowers perfumed the air with their sweet scent. Georgiana and Kitty went over to the blooms and buried their noses in them, then decided to collect the fallen petals to make scent.
Mr Darcy stood and watched his sister enjoying herself with Kitty as the two young ladies collected handfuls of pink petals.
‘I have not seen Georgiana looking so happy for a long time,’ he said.
Elizabeth watched the two young ladies with pleasure.
‘I think she and Georgiana will become friends,’ she said. ‘They will do each other good. Kitty will lift Georgiana’s spirits and Georgiana will have a calming influence on Kitty. Kitty has not had any suitable friends of her own age, either. Lydia is too wild and Mary is too dour. She and Georgiana can talk about all the things that interest girls of their age. They can stroll in the gardens and make flower collections and pot pourris and other such things when the weather is good, and they can look through fashion books together and read novels together when it rains.’
‘Novels?’ asked Mr Darcy with a frown. ‘I am not sure that novels are suitable reading for Georgiana.’
‘On the contrary, they will lift her spirits,’ said Elizabeth, turning towards him with confidence. ‘That is what you want, is it not?’
Mr Darcy reluctantly agreed. ‘Yes, it is,’ he said. ‘Perhaps one or two novels, carefully chosen, would not be so terrible.’
Elizabeth knew it was not easy for him to change and she gave him full credit
for being prepared to do so. She could not expect him to do so all at once, but he had made a start.
‘I must thank you for not betraying my sister’s confidence,’ he said, turning to Elizabeth and looking at her sincerely.
‘Did you think I would?’ asked Elizabeth in surprise.
Mr Darcy pursed his lips. ‘I have few illusions where life is concerned,’ he said. ‘There are very few people who can keep a confidence, even if they swear to do so, and you have no reason to keep this one. Georgiana was not a member of your family, and I —’
‘Yes?’ Elizabeth prompted him.
‘I had not been very polite to you,’ he said.
‘Not very polite?’ Elizabeth laughed. ‘Mr Darcy, you had been extremely rude!’
He looked ashamed of himself. ‘Yes, I had. It was not well done of me. But I did not know you then and I had no reason to trust you. Even so, you kept Georgiana’s confidence, and I know how much ladies like to gossip,’ he said.
‘I cannot pretend to be better than the rest of my sex where that is concerned,’ said Elizabeth, ‘but I hope I know the difference between harmless gossip and the kind of gossip that will cause a great deal of unhappiness. Your sister’s secret is safe with me.’
‘I know it and I thank you for it. My sister is very precious to me and it is both my duty and my privilege to care for her.’
The two young ladies had by this time gathered the fallen rose petals and wrapped them in their handkerchiefs. Elizabeth suggested they should leave the rose garden and go down the long walk to the folly, and they all agreed. It was in a sheltered avenue and they would be out of the wind.
Georgiana and Kitty walked ahead, chattering happily.
As she saw Mr Darcy’s eyes lingering on his sister, Elizabeth said, ‘Sometimes there can be too much care. Forgive me for speaking frankly, but you watch over her with more attention than is needed.’
‘Since the business with Mr Wickham, can you blame me?’ he asked.
‘Perhaps not, but you have always done so, have you not? I had an opportunity to talk to Georgiana when we were in Ramsgate, and I understand that she did not go to school.’
‘No, she did not. But neither did you.’
Elizabeth looked surprised that he should know this, but he said, ‘Georgiana mentioned it.’
‘Ah.’ Elizabeth nodded, understanding.
She continued to walk down the long, gravel path to the folly which stood at the end of it. It was a small building with open sides supported by columns and a domed roof. When they reached it, Elizabeth and Darcy sat on the seat that ran round the inside, while Georgiana and Kitty amused themselves by arranging their rose petals on the grass, according to size.
‘It is true, I did not go to school,’ said Elizabeth, turning to look at him. ‘But I had four sisters to play with, and talk to, and walk with. Your sister has no one.’
‘Perhaps you are right. But, you see, since our father’s death – our mother died when Georgiana was very young – I have had to be both parents to Georgiana as well as a brother.’
Elizabeth thought how hard that must have been for him. Her parents were decidedly odd, for she had a silly and embarrassing mother, and a lazy father, but even so they were her parents and she loved them. There would have been a big hole in her life if they had died, and she was full of sympathy as she realised that, for Mr Darcy, that hole in his life was real and he had to live with it day by day. So did his sister. Small wonder, then, that he tried to fill that hole for her by being father, mother and brother all at once.
‘I understand,’ she said, and her voice showed that she did, truly, understand. ‘Even so, many parents send their children to school,’ she continued. ‘If you were being parents to her as well as a brother, could you not have found some good school for her, so that she could make friends?’
He winced.
She was surprised at his extreme reaction. She knew that he thought highly of himself and the Darcy name but this was taking things too far.
‘Many girls from the best families go to select seminaries,’ she continued. ‘Surely even a man as proud as you are must know of some school you would find suitable for your sister?’
‘No!’ he said, jumping up and striding around the folly.
She was astonished at his vehemence.
‘Are the Darcys really so high they cannot mix with anyone else?’ she asked, her eyes wide open and her eyebrows raised.
He gave a shuddering sigh and sat down again. He leant forward, and for a moment she thought he was going to put his head in his hands, but instead he rested his elbows on his knees. Then, having collected himself, he sat back again.
‘You misunderstand me,’ he said, shaking his head.
He turned to look at her and she could tell he was undecided about something. Then he gave an almost invisible nod of his head, as if to himself, as he made his decision.
‘It is not my custom to speak openly to people,’ he began, ‘but something about your own openness and trustworthiness has unlocked something inside me and I find myself willing to speak to you.’
Elizabeth waited with bated breath, wondering what was coming.
‘You have perhaps noticed there is a wide gap in ages between my sister and myself,’ he went on. ‘I am twenty-eight years old and my sister is fifteen.’
He glanced towards Georgiana, who was still busily occupied in playing with her rose petals. Her laughter, accompanied by Kitty’s laughter, reached them through the crisp autumn air.
‘I had not thought of it, but yes,’ said Elizabeth.
‘There was not always such a large gap. We had two sisters. Catherine, named after my aunt, Lady Catherine de Bourgh, and Anne, named after my mother, came in between us. They were both sent away to school, a very good establishment, from the age of eleven. But there was an epidemic at the school. My sisters were both there at the time. The school acted responsibly and called the best doctors but it made no difference. Catherine was one of the first to catch the fever and she died very quickly. Anne died a week later. It threw Pemberley into a terrible period of mourning. My mother never recovered from the shock. She had not been in good health since the birth of Georgiana, and she faded rapidly after the deaths of my sisters. Less than six months later, she followed them to the grave.’
Elizabeth felt tears gathering on her eyelashes and she felt a sob rising in her throat. She listened in silence to his speech because she knew what it cost him to make it but she longed to reach out and comfort him, and she would have done so, if it had been permissible. His tension, his horror, his fear and his distress were etched on his face as he relived the memories and Elizabeth’s heart turned over inside her chest. He had known so much loss and borne it so bravely . . . She felt humbled that he had chosen to share such intimate memories with her.
‘Mr Darcy, I am so sorry,’ she said.
There was a catch in her throat and she did not dare say more, for fear of crying.
‘I have upset you. That was not my intention,’ he said, turning towards her with eyes full of concern.
And what eyes they were. They were warm, soft and velvety, and they, too, swam with tears. She had never seen his eyes look like that before. They were usually hard and arrogant, but she saw now that his pride was a shield, something to protect him from further loss and suffering and to hold the pain at bay. Again, she wanted to reach out and touch him but such things were forbidden.
‘It is no matter,’ she said, taking her handkerchief out of her reticule. ‘It is nothing next to your suffering. I think that you, as well as your sister, have not had anyone to talk to for a very long time.’
He nodded in acknowledgement of the sympathy in her voice and she knew he was grateful for it. It had created a bond between them that would be hard to break.
‘I do not know what came over me,’ he said as he blinked the tears away. ‘I should not have mentioned it. An English gentlemen does not talk of such things. He does not reveal hi
s feelings. Forgive me.’
‘There is nothing to forgive,’ she said, looking at him with bright eyes, her head held high. ‘I feel privileged that you have confided in me.’ She added, ‘I need hardly say that your confidence is safe with me.’
‘Yes. I know it is,’ he said softly.
He laid his hand on top of hers and Elizabeth felt a touching of their hearts and souls. It was the most powerful thing she had ever felt.
‘Miss Elizabeth —’ he began.
The moment was broken by Mrs Bennet’s loud voice calling, ‘We have come to join you. Such a beautiful day! Mr Bingley was wild to show Jane the garden.’
Elizabeth felt that her mother’s intrusion could not have been worse timed. Mr Darcy withdrew his hand and stood up. But something of their closeness lingered. It was in the air, even though they were no longer touching, and she still felt connected to him.
She took a few moments to gather her thoughts. She dabbed her eyes and returned her handkerchief to her reticule. Then she walked out of the folly and went towards her mother’s party, who were approaching down the gravel walk.
Mr Bingley was looking embarrassed, as well he might, for of course he had not been “wild to show Jane the garden”. Elizabeth doubted if Mr Bingley could ever be wild about anything! But he certainly looked pleased to be with Jane, and proud to be escorting her round his grounds.
Mr Darcy followed Elizabeth out of the folly at a discreet distance.
Caroline Bingley did not look pleased, in fact she looked as if she were angry, and only containing her anger with the greatest difficulty. The reason was not difficult to discover. She admired Mr Darcy greatly, and she wanted to be Mrs Darcy, and so the fact that he had chosen to escort Elizabeth around the gardens had seriously annoyed her.
Georgiana and Kitty picked up their rose petals and the whole party gathered together out in the autumn sunshine.
Elizabeth felt a sense of loss and growing exasperation. Not only had she lost the chance for any further intimate discussions with Mr Darcy, but her family was behaving in the most embarrassing way.
Darcy and Elizabeth What If? Collection 1 Page 16
