by BA Tortuga
Josh nodded. “Especially since you weren’t feeling great this morning.”
“Head-wise, this is a better move.” Kris chuckled and raised his voice enough to get their waitress’s attention. “Does Cypress like dessert? We can get him something to go.”
“I’ll grab him a piece of cherry pie. That’s his favorite.”
“Thanks.” Kris sipped his water, sobering. “Okay, so I can work up a contract tonight. Did you want to hit the other galleries?”
“I do. I want to see everything.”
“Sounds good.” Kris patted his leg one last time before letting go.
“Yeah. Good exercise too.”
“Yep.” Their dessert came, and Kris eyed the big hunk of cake. “I’ll need it.”
“I’ll work any extra off you,” he offered.
Kris’s green eyes widened, went hot as an August day in Austin. “Okay. Deal.”
“Cool. Works for me.”
Kris lowered his voice. “If we weren’t parked on the main road, I’d get you to suck me in the car.”
Oh fuck. Fuck. He was going to cream his jeans. He swallowed hard, wondering if they could get the cake to go.
“Patience, Iago.” They laughed together, and God, he loved Kris. He was in love, and that wasn’t going to go away, not ever. Even if this ended poorly, their little fantasy holiday, it didn’t matter. His heart belonged to Kris.
“Eat your cake, baby. We have plenty of time. Your artist won’t want to talk until he’s out of his productive phase. That could be days.”
“Right. So we can explore. Together.”
“You know it.” Looked like Kris was back on his game.
He wasn’t sure what had happened, but thank God it had. Josh said a little prayer that this would continue, this good mood and hot stare and all.
It was only fair. He’d been good as gold. Not a drop in years. Nothing.
And it was worth it.
He dug into his cake, surprising himself with a deep moan of pleasure.
“Sounds good,” Kris said.
“Tastes amazing.”
“So does the carrot cake.” Kris wolfed down a huge bite.
“Good.” Kris felt better, Josh had no doubt. The waitress brought a container of cherry pie and two cups of coffee.
“Cake needs coffee,” she said.
“Oh, thank you. It smells like heaven.”
“Coffee fiend,” Kris teased.
“You know it.” He loved it, from the scent to the flavor. Coffee was an addiction he could legally and morally get behind.
He sucked down a swallow, letting himself drink deep.
Kris ate more cake instead, moaning over the cream cheese frosting. Josh wrinkled his nose, loving that he could play.
“Yeah, I know. You don’t love the sour, but, man, this is good.”
“Someone has to eat it.”
“Lots of people do.” Kris licked his fork. “Yum.”
He gagged, managing not to crack up.
“Oh hush.” Kris threatened a fork stabbing.
Josh threw his hands over his chest. “Wounded!”
“Oh, I can tell. So delicate, you.”
“Totally. I’m a delicate fucking flower.”
Kris hooted. “A wilted violet on the trash heap of life.”
He gave Kris a wrist to forehead, swooning dramatically. They cackled together like a pair of blackbirds in the New Mexico sky.
What an amazing fucking day. He looked out the window, the light pouring in, the blue of the sky hurting his eyes. Josh just hoped it kept going on.
He was beginning to need it in ways he might not be able to recover from.
7
The contract was signed. They’d scheduled the showing for a month and a half from now.
Kris blinked down at the folder of paperwork. So the gallery had another two months, at least. They also had a car full of art from Madrid’s other artists.
It had been a good few days, full of sex and food and art and Josh. He’d missed the son of a bitch—missed his sense of humor and the way he sang in the shower. He’d missed Josh’s lean body, which was in so much better shape than before.
“Hey, cowboy.” Josh’s hands wrapped around his waist. “You’re thinking hard.”
“Am I?” The B and B had proven to be comfortable as well as lovely, and he was going to miss it when they left—baked eggs notwithstanding. Kris leaned back against Josh, feeling warmth and care emanating from the man.
“Seems like it. Missing home?”
“Not too bad, though I would kill for a Dr Pepper.”
“You want me to go to the convenience store to get you one?”
“Nope.” He laced his hands over Josh’s. “I want you here.”
Josh leaned in against him, rubbing nice and easy. That heat made all his muscles relax and his cock stiffen. God, this was like a fairy-tale world.
He wasn’t sure what he was going to do when it ended. Probably have a breakdown and eat chocolate.
“Easy, lover. I got you.” Soft kisses brushed his cheek, the line of his jaw.
“Mmm.” Yeah, Kris could forget everything for a bit.
“Man, I could live here. There’s something about the light.” Josh kept touching and stroking, murmuring softly.
“There is, isn’t there?” Santa Fe seemed magical. A place out of time.
“Mm-hmm. I’m sure Austin will be good, but this is amazing.”
Kris turned to kiss Josh instead of answering. He had no idea what Austin would bring, but this couldn’t last. Josh would fuck up sooner or later. All alcoholics did.
He hated that, knowing that the demon would take the love of his life again. He hated that it kept sneaking in.
So for now he ignored it, kissing Josh hard enough to forget anything else. Josh opened up, tongue sliding against his, meeting his passion. They clung together, the whole morning suddenly serious, urgent.
Josh seemed more than willing to give him what he needed, what he was asking for.
Kris took every touch greedily, matching every stroke of lips and tongues.
Josh’s lips left his with a pop, the man coming to rest between his legs.
“Where are you going, baby?” Kris asked.
Josh reached for his belt, face a study in concentration. Kris sucked in his belly, giving those clever hands more space.
Fuck, what a visual. Josh with his hair wild around him, kneeling before him like a pale angel.
Kris slid his hands into the red strands, combing through the heavy stuff. Kris petted the thick soft hair and lifted Josh’s face as his cock sprang free. He rubbed his cock against the slight stubble on Josh’s cheek. Oh. Oh, Jesus. That burned so good.
He moaned, his hips rocking, his muscles clenching to keep him upright. Josh chuckled at him, rubbing his cock with the morning-rough skin.
Kris moaned. “That’s amazing, baby.”
“Mmm. Smell good.” Soft licks covered his shaft.
“How do I taste?” He slid his thumb along Josh’s lower lip, opening him up.
“Fuck, baby. You make me crazy,” Kris said.
“There’s nothing wrong with that. You have too much sense in your life.”
“You think so?” Kris chuckled. “You always say I’m too buttoned-up.”
“I do. Now, I need to suck you off.”
“I’m not arguing.” No way was he gonna fight anything right now.
“Good man.” Josh hummed, wrapping his lips around Kris’s cockhead.
The suction made Kris’s eyes cross, made his belly pull in tight and hard. Fuck him raw, that was magic.
Kris tried to breathe, tried to memorize every touch. He kept ahold of Josh’s hair, not directing, just holding on. He needed the anchor to keep from flying to pieces.
Josh looked up at him, eyes warm, laughing. Happy. God, had he ever made anyone else so happy? He stroked Josh’s cheek with his thumb, smiling into those eyes.
Then Josh bobbed h
is head again, swallowing hard.
Kris cried out, his balls drawing up so tight he couldn’t breathe. So close. This close.
Josh reached up, knocked his balls, just right.
He lost it, emptying himself deep into Josh’s throat, so hot and good. Josh groaned, swallowed, and took him, every drop.
That hair clung to his hands, crackling with static, and Kris smoothed it, murmuring nonsense words, love words.
Josh leaned into the touch, head heavy, neck loose.
“What do you need, baby?” Kris asked, wanting to give as well as take.
“You. Just touch me and tell me we’re good.”
“We are.” Right here and now they were so good that Kris never wanted it to end.
“Fucking A.” Josh took Kris’s hand and wrapped it around his prick. “Please.”
Kris nodded and began to stroke, working his thumb over the tip every time he got close enough to do it. Josh moved for him, strong little legs grounded to the floor like they were rooted.
Steady as a rock, his Josh. He pulled that long cock, loving how he could feel Josh’s pulse thundering against his palm.
Josh let his head fall back, let him see the long column of throat work in his passion. Pale, perfect skin begged for him to lick and suck, the tats not climbing that far yet.
He leaned forward and fastened his lips to that undeniable skin. He needed to leave a mark, temporary as it might be.
Kris sucked, knowing that hickey would be lurid.
Josh didn’t try to stop him, either. Hell, the man encouraged him, grabbing him and pulling him close. That hot body rocked against his, Josh needing beautifully.
The drops from Josh’s cock coated his fingers, painted them with Josh’s pleasure. He rubbed them into the skin of the shaft, slicking his way. Josh went up on tiptoe, rocking into his hand.
“So hot for me, baby. I want to see you come. I love your face when you do.”
“Need you. Nothing…. Oh fuck, Kris.”
“Come on.” He pinched the slit at the tip of Josh’s cock.
“Jesus.” Josh’s head landed on his shoulder as heat poured over his fingers, that spunk thick and hot. He rubbed it into Josh’s skin, the scent of completion heady. His neck got a soft, gentle kiss. “So good.”
“Mmm. Hello and good morning.” Kris felt like a million bucks, like the whole damn world was new and sparkly.
“Good morning to you. There’s muffins and coffee downstairs, if you want.”
They were supposed to be heading to Cypress’s house for the afternoon for a barbecue before staying their last night here. Cypress promised friends, family, and food.
“I do. Muffins good.” He was trying for coherent.
“I’ll fetch and carry.” Josh wasn’t moving, though….
“Mmm. In a few.” Kris knew Josh would need coffee soon, but they could hold on a bit longer. He soaked up the contact. Basking was necessary, a way to connect that went deeper than sex.
“I love it here, you know. It’s magical.”
“I know.” Kris stroked Josh’s hair, lost in the softness of it. “I know.”
Josh kissed his cheek. “I love you too. I mean, I know you know, but I always have. Always will.”
God. He hugged Josh tight, hiding his face in that hair. “Love has never been the problem, baby.”
“I know, but I’ve proven myself, yeah? I changed. I got better.”
“You did.” No addict ever really recovered, but Kris let it drop, knowing arguing it would only hurt Josh again.
Josh beamed at him, and he got a hard, happy kiss. “Okay. I’m fixin’ to starve. You want one or two?”
“Muffins? Or sugars in my coffee?” He slapped Josh’s ass. “Both.”
“Butthead.” Josh headed to the bathroom to clean up. “What did you want to pick up for Cypress’s party?”
“We should bring something that will go with anything. Chips and salsa or rolls or something. Maybe hit that bakery and get cookies. You know the gluten-free one?”
“Works for me. Get a case of water too.”
“Yeah, that works.” Water was the best option. He’d never been as dehydrated and thirsty as he had been here. “There’s a Whole Foods near, right? Cutest, tiny store.”
“Yep. Maybe they have mashed potatoes. I love their mashed potatoes.”
“You and your carbs,” Kris teased.
“Yep. Speaking of. Muffins. Hooray. Be right back up.”
Kris watched Josh go, a smile on his face. He had no idea where they would go from here, but right now was good.
He had to take it. He loved the son of a bitch with all his heart, whether it was wise or not.
8
“Good Lord, what is that?” Josh looked at the little pillows of fried bread goodness. “And can I have one?”
“Of course. Navajo fry bread. Enjoy.”
“Thank you.” Oh God. Heaven. This place was heaven. Cypress had a crazy little house made of adobe clay and old tires, the windows all made out of bottles cut into pieces.
There were people everywhere—drumming in a circle, dancing, eating and talking, and just lying in the sun, soaking it up like lizards. Kris had this bemused smile on his face, standing across the way, chatting with a huge Native American dude.
He watched the dancers, swaying idly as he ate his crunchy bread. As soon as he finished, Cypress latched on to him. “Dance with me.”
He laughed, tossed his paper towel in the closest trash barrel, and grabbed Cy, started dancing.
Cypress hooted, raising his arms over his head and gyrating.
Josh was having a ball, just letting himself relax and let go. He felt like someone had unlocked him, cracked his chest open and given him room to breathe again. The whole world seemed brighter, cleaner.
He spun Cy around, his face lifted to the sunshine.
“Hey, now. Dance with me,” Kris said, grabbing his hips. Where had Kris come from?
“I’d love to.” He moved into Kris’s arms, laughing happily. “Hey, cowboy.”
“Hey.” Kris smiled and whirled him away.
He fit perfectly in Kris’s arms, the day warming up beautifully. Other dancers moved around them, but no one said a word to them, leaving them in their own world.
Amazing. This was utterly amazing. His heart pounded, throbbing in his chest. All he could do was hang on and let Kris lead him around.
Magic.
This was magic. Josh rested his cheek against Kris’s shoulder and hummed along with the beat, making melodies where there were none.
“I forgot how good it was to dance with you.” Kris’s whisper was soft as warm butter.
Josh nodded, his head brushing Kris’s cheek, the action making him blink. He wanted to stay like this forever.
That was never gonna happen, but a man could dream.
Maybe he had to dream to stay sane.
He grinned, the thought fanciful enough that Kris would protest. His practical cowboy.
“You got wicked in your pretty head, babe.”
“Do I?” He moved them in a slow circle, wanting to touch and kiss.
“Mm-hmm. I approve.”
God, he was going to cream his jeans. Kris’s voice had taken on that deep, husky tone that meant he was thinking sexy thoughts.
“I….” He rubbed just the barest bit, his eyelids heavy.
“Shh. It’s okay. We can dance and think crazy things together,” Kris murmured.
“Sounds like heaven on earth.”
“Does it? I think heaven would be us together at the B and B, but that would be rude.”
“I don’t hate anticipation. Seduction. Dancing together.”
“I like dancing,” Kris agreed, swinging him in a slow circle.
He liked the whole idea of together. Josh craved it more than he’d ever wanted his next drink. Kris was his constant addiction.
Hell, Kris was his motherfucking heartbeat.
Josh sighed, leaning closer to hide his
face. His emotions ran all over the map these days.
“Mmm. Want you like breathing, baby.”
“Good. Hard to give up something you need that bad.”
From his lips to God’s ears. Please, let it be so.
Okay, so Kris was about to lose his shit.
He wanted to take Josh back to the B and B so bad. Cypress and his friends were a hoot, but this party was never gonna end.
It was pitch-black, the bonfire roared, and there were people partying everywhere. Someone with pink hair had dragged Kris off about half an hour ago, wanting to talk to him about his YouTube videos involving a pig, a squirrel, and his tattoos.
That had been…. Wow.
Kris figured it was time to find his man and head out.
There was singing going on around the bonfire, loud and raucous and sort of drunkenly unintelligible. Kris felt his face tighten when he pressed his lips together. Not his circus, not his monkeys, right? He still had a drink once in a while, but he hadn’t been drunk since that horrible night at the ranch.
Not once.
He caught sight of Josh’s red hair, come loose from its braid, shining in the firelight as Cypress leaned against him.
Kris frowned harder. Okay, he just needed to chill out, go get Josh, and go. He just wanted his man, some alone time, and to get someplace quiet. That was it.
He was almost to the crazy, laughing circle of men when Cypress reached up and pressed a bottle to Josh’s lips.
The world screeched to a stop, hard enough that he actually stumbled backward. Kris blinked, sure he was wrong, that Josh wasn’t really gulping down a beer.
But that was what he was seeing. The label on the bottle looked familiar, like Fat Tire maybe, and he knew that was a Colorado brew. He felt like his chest was cracked, all along his breastbone. All that talk. All the fucking promises, and they didn’t mean a thing. Not compared to the addiction, right?
That need would always come first. Always. Kris had learned that in the womb.
Josh took another drink, then began to laugh, and fuck, he looked like a motherfucking monster, face drawn into a grimace, the firelight accentuating the lines and shadows. Panic squeezed Kris’s chest, but he found his feet moving him forward, toward Josh. Not away like he wanted.
