But what if he, like the last young soldier, also died in her care? Would she have to disappear again? It was too unthinkable to even worry about at this moment. She was past exhaustion and needed to rest and keep her wits about her. She made one last inspection of her young patient, then knowing she had done all that was humanly possible, she cleared all her medicines and tools away and began her nightly ritual of food, bath, and rest.
"Something about structure in your life is beneficial." Caitlin could hear the words of her Grandmama. And she was right. Structure provided one a way to get from one thing to another without having to figure everything out every time. She laughed to herself as she thought about this because, as a young girl, she really disliked any structure whatsoever and was usually in some hot water because of her refusal to follow it!
The next morning Caitlin checked on the lad as soon as she awoke. He was still sleeping soundly, which was a good thing because when he did awaken, he would likely be screaming in agony. Taking away part of a limb not only causes great physical pain, but the first time one sees a part of their body missing, there is often more psychological pain, which is even more difficult to overcome.
Caitlin was steeling herself as she had many times before, to help the lad come to grips with his new disability. No doubt, from the looks of the wound this morning, he would recover, but still needed several days of care before she would allow him to leave the cave. So, she contented herself to stay with him and get herself ready to deal with the brothers, not something she was looking forward to. Those three were difficult, probably individually as well as when they presented as a group. Well, she had dealt with worse.
She had each one pegged already, as it were. Alexander, the eldest, was apparently the intellectual one. She recalled his face as he watched her tend his brother. He kept his thoughts to himself and all his actions would come only after careful consideration beforehand. Not bad characteristics, she thought. Even though he was only about an inch or so shorter than Jack, he used his mind rather than his size to influence others.
Jack, the loud talking, stomping bull, was probably the least dangerous one of all. She had seen this sort many times. Giant though they were in size, they really just needed someone with a firm hand and a gentle heart to keep them on an even keel.
Then Hector, the negotiator. Such smooth words. And his manner of speaking! He could talk anyone into anything. She had seen his kind before also. Woe be unto any woman who would believe his drivel! She laughed at this thought.
Then she found her thoughts returning to Alexander. Of them all, she would be most careful with him. Somehow she sensed danger coming from this one, and was aware that her female instincts came alive when he spoke to here.
"Woman! You've been alone in this cave too long!" she chided herself. But being alone was not new to Caitlin. She had led a fairly solitary childhood, having been brought up by her grandparents and an eccentric uncle. As was very common in that time, her mother had died shortly after giving her birth. Her father was unable to care for this infant as his grief kept him in a state of inertia; he barely functioned, and much more was required in caring for a new baby.
Caitlin's grandparents took the child and were glad to do so. Their only daughter-in-law was gone, but this new granddaughter filled an emptiness that no other could have. Her father, still grieving some months later, signed on to a sailing vessel headed for the West Indies. There was no word from him since that time. Caitlin often wished she could have known him. Surely, he must have been a special person for her mother to have created a child with him. Her grandparents assured her he was a fine son, a caring husband and that she had characteristics that were much like him — probably meaning his temper!
Shortly after she had changed the dressings on Ian's leg, Willie ran to the cave entrance, not growling, but announcing there was someone close by. Caitlin spoke softly to him.
"Stay, Willie. Let's see who's here."
The healer was expecting to see three brothers, but only one man came walking down the path, stopping by the trees to tether his horse. It was Alexander — "the thinker that sends out signals of danger," she murmured to herself. She still had not been able to put her finger on what it was about him that warned her to be cautious in her dealings with him. But, whatever it was, Willie did not seem to think he was dangerous as he began wagging his bushy tail the moment the man got to the entry.
"Huh, maybe he knows something about this man that I don't just yet," talking to herself again.
"Good morning, healer," Alexander greeted her, nodding slightly in her direction. He looked a bit more rested today she thought. He was quite a handsome man, with his dark hair curling around the edge of his collar, and the searching dark eyes that seemed to take in everything around him. He was obviously not an extremely young man, but it was difficult to tell what age he really was. Maybe in his thirties, she thought. He was still very muscular, as most soldiers were, but he moved with a grace that was unexpected in one his size. He would be even more appealing if he would smile, she ventured.
Alexander towered over her and she found herself a bit discomfited being with him without the other brothers.
"I hope I haven't come too early, but we need to get going as soon as possible and make as much time as we can before dark."
He didn't wait for her to direct him, but rather, just started back to the room where they had taken Ian.
Perhaps because she still sensed some measure of danger from this man, she stepped in front of him, arms akimbo.
"Do you always just barge into someone's home without invitation? This may be a cave, but at the moment it is MY home and I decide who comes through my door!"
Caitlin was a bit surprised at herself as she realized that the tone she had taken could be considered harsh.
Alexander stopped in his tracks. He was at a loss for words, suddenly, which was a most unusual occurrence for him as he always knew exactly what to say under most circumstances.
"I . . . uh . . . I beg your pardon, healer. I am anxious to see my brother, and I just assumed ye would permit me to do so. I didn't intend to 'barge' as ye called it. My apologies to ye," and he nodded again to her.
When Caitlin had raised her voice, Willie was at her side immediately, standing at attention with a brief quivering of his shoulders, waiting for a signal from her either to attack or to stay. She finally gave the non-verbal signal and he relaxed and sat at her feet.
Caitlin nodded to the man and began to lead the way back to the young boy. She walked over to the lad and touched his brow, finding it still cool.
"He's still sleeping at the moment. But he hasn't developed a fever, so I believe he's escaped infection, at least so far."
"How am I going to put him on a horse if he's sleeping?"
Alexander spoke loudly and looked at her as if she were responsible for Ian still being in this state. And, actually, she was, as she had given him medicine that would relieve pain, but would also make him sleep. But it would wear off shortly now, she knew.
"What was your name again?" she queried.
"Alexander. Alexander MacKinnon."
"Well, then, Mr. MacKinnon. Your brother will not be able to leave with you today, even when he does awaken, and he will do so shortly. His leg is healing well at this time, but it would only take the smallest amount of jostling on a horse to undo the good that we have done so far.
Amputation of a limb is a most tedious procedure and the recovery is even more so. He will not leave here today, sir!" With that she walked out and headed toward the cooking room.
"I see," he said, following closely behind her, scratching at his several days old beard. Alexander searched for the right response to this news. But, having already offended the healer once, he was still struggling with saying something that would make her understand the seriousness of what he was dealing with.
He followed her a bit farther and asked,
"And should I just continue to call ye healer, or do ye
have a name as well?" With a quick jerk of her head, she looked back at the man.
"Of course I have a name. Caitlin. That's enough for the moment. And, you may use that if you wish."
"Caitlin. Somehow I must make ye understand the situation. Our situation that is. What I must do as quickly as possible. He was still stuttering trying to explain this problem, rubbing his hand across the back of his neck, making her wonder if he was in pain.
"Mr. MacKinnon," she began.
"Oh, no. Just Alexander. Or Alex, please. I'm no a formal man, and don't wish to be addressed as one."
"I see. Then, Alex, have you had any breakfast yet? No? Good. Then let's go to my 'kitchen' if you can call it that, and I'll find something for us to eat."
"Yes, yes, I am a bit hungry. We've been traveling with not much time for eating, ye ken." She believed him, but also remembered seeing muscles that rippled on his forearms yesterday when he lifted his brother up on her table. Funny. Now, why do I remember that, she wondered to herself.
The man's brogue was still strong, but she was beginning to get the cadence of it and wasn't missing every other word as she did yesterday. Strange that people of the same country can have such different ways of saying the same words.
The two of them sat at a small makeshift table she had placed along the side of the cave. There were several candles resting in carved out niches on the wall, and a small bowl with a bit of purple heather she had picked on the moor sat on the table. Hanging from the ceiling were some herbs she was drying, to be used in cooking, preparation of medicines, and some just for the aroma they gave off. So, it was a pleasant place, as far as a cave goes, that is.
"Here. Sit. I'll find something that will soothe us both."
Caitlin poured some of her herbal tea and passed a large mug of it to Alex, who picked it up immediately and began sipping.
Looking at Alexander across the table, Caitlin was surprised to find small crinkles at the corners of his eyes, a sure sign of one who laughs often. And she had thought he was too serious for that.
'Well, healer, looks like you might have misread more than you thought," she continued her internal dialogue.
Alex had yet to come across any woman who had held his attention for longer than a night or two. And there hadn't been very many of those either. He usually found women to be just a bit too gabby, or even worse, silly. Having a serious conversation with them didn't seem possible, or at least not to him. In fact, Mam was the only woman he gave credit for being highly intelligent and one who was interesting to converse with.
However, this small, fiery-haired healer seemed to capture his imagination and he was having difficulty putting her into one of the categories he usually placed women in, again, silly or too talkative. And then some were just plain out ugly. Well, she certainly wasn't any of those. And, it had registered with him that not only was she not ugly, but she was most attractive. There was something about that flaming hair that always seemed to be coming away from its pinnings and falling down her neck.
Bringing his mind back to the present, he continued, "Healer, uh Caitlin, I can think of no other way to make ye understand, so I'll just tell ye the truth. I only hope ye'll not betray us."
He looked at the ceiling as if he would find some assistance up there, then rubbed his neck again and let out a deep breath he apparently had been holding in.
"My brothers, Hector and Jack, are soldiers as am I. We were in the Fourteenth Regiment under the command of Captain Reginald Ferguson. Our regiment's been fighting for many months now, across many different areas of our country, doing our part trying to return the Bonnie Prince to his proper place. As ye well know, from the soldiers ye've been treating, these battles aren't going well, and there aren't many of us left, especially after Culloden. And the ones of us that are left are exhausted and weary of killing our own countrymen."
"We MacKinnons try to look out for each other, as any brothers would. And, so far, we've managed to escape any dire wounds and we're thankful for that. We've all suffered some minor injuries from firearms and blades, but nothing we couldn't deal with. But, just now, everything has become very difficult. Young Ian, in there on your table, has brought us a new problem we must deal with."
Alex wondered, just for a moment, what was running through the healer's mind as she began to rise from the tale and turned herself so she was facing him directly. She put her tea cup down and stood, then put her hands on the table and leaned across into his "space" as it were.
"What is that lad doing fighting with ye anyway? I can't believe ye would put that young man in such danger! Have ye no sense! Any of the three of ye?"
When she was upset, Caitlin's words such as "you" became "ye," a sure holdover from living with Uncle Wabi who sometimes used them, but not always. She had observed Alex also seemed to have that problem. Or maybe he always used them.
"He's only a boy, for heaven's sakes!" She backed away from the table and was practically yelling at him by this point.
With him still seated, they were at eye level and she was staring him down.
"Whoa, healer, er, Caitlin." Alex held his hands up in front of his chest as if to protect himself from this angry woman.
"It's not the way ye think. When we joined the regiment, many months ago now, we left young Ian at home with our Da, which is as it should be. Da needs him to help keep the place up, and Ian was much too young to be a soldier. Of course he pleaded with us to bring him, but we refused. But, as it is, ye see, a few weeks ago he turned up at our regiment's camp, just outside the village where we'd been fighting. We still don't know how he found us, but find us he did. So there wasn't much else to do but keep him with us. Of course, our plan was to send him right back home, but there was a lot of commotion in the area and we were engaged in battle almost full time.
"Well, as ye are aware, the battle at Culloden was a most disastrous day for many, many Scots, on both sides of the argument. His expression changed and his voice drifted off as he remembered that day . . .
* * *
"The sun was hiding and a thick grey fog was hovering along the ground. Men were moaning and the odor of gunpowder mingled in with the stench of spilled blood, and there were endless bodies everywhere." He looked at her, seeking understanding as he continued.
"It became obvious that this battle was lost, and one of us was already wounded. Jack had taken a bullet in his calf, but was able to get on a horse well enough. He's tough as a bull, he is.
"But, just as we were trying to help him to the medical tent some distance away, a Redcoat came charging through our midst, screaming at the top of his voice he was, and striking at any and everything that got in his path! He was swinging an axe as he bent low on his horse. As he got nearer, Ian tried to run, but the Redcoat was too quick, and the axe caught Ian in the leg. Well, I don't need to tell ye anymore about that.
"Now, healer, I've seen enough fighting to know when ye need to retreat, and this was one of those times. So, I decided the four of us had done all we could for the Bonnie Prince, and it was time to take care of the MacKinnons. So, with that decision made, we threw Ian over his horse and the four of us left, hoping to find someone to help us. Well, ye see, the commander called us deserters as we rode out. He implied he would send scouts to find us and bring us up on desertion charges.
"Not a pretty story, I know, but there is the truth of it. So, we're trying to get back to our home, which is far up in the Highlands and very remote. If we can just get back, we feel there's a certain amount of safety there. I rather doubt, too, that after Culloden there'll be much appetite for searching for deserters on either side."
Alex watched as comprehension walked across the healer's face. He knew she probably shared Mam's feelings about war — that they were all senseless. But, Alex witnessed that the healer obviously knew her part was to mend those she could, and bring comfort when possible.
After listening to Alex's story, Caitlin could see that even though this soldier had not been woun
ded, he was suffering nevertheless. The "danger" she had been sensing from him was actually anxiety and fear he felt for his brothers, and it was evident in his every movement.
Caitlin often wished she didn't possess this ability to sense others' distress. She supposed it was helpful when you are a healer, but it could be a hindrance as well.
Alex, being the eldest, probably felt a great amount of responsibility for his brothers' safety. Well, she thought, it's much easier to heal a battle wound than it is to fix this man's situation. About all she could offer was her support and her promise not to "betray" them as he requested.
"Don't you be worried about my betraying you or anyone else as far as that goes. I ask no questions of those I tend, and what I hear, I keep to myself. Your secret is safe with me." With that she stood and went back to Ian's side to take another look at him.
"And just how long have you been awake, young man?" she asked. She could see he was trying to remember who she was and probably wondered if he should know her. Caitlin knew his mind must feel foggy and was pleased when she saw his head turn quickly when he heard a voice that he most certainly did know.
"Alex! Is that ye?" the lad asked, trying to raise up. With this exertion, he let out a loud gasp followed by a mournful cry that the healer knew indicated he had realized he was in pain — and why.
"Alex! Alex! My leg! No! No!" Alex quickly ran to Ian and took the boy's hands in his.
"Easy brother, easy now. Ye'll be alright. Yer in the best of hands. Lie back now." Alex's voice was deep and very soothing, and Ian responded to his commands.
"Where am I?" the lad asked, avoiding looking down at his leg. Caitlin stood on the other side and spoke to him.
"You're a guest in my home as it turns out," she said with a slight smile on her face. I'm Caitlin, a healer. You're recovering well, Ian, but you must lie still and be as quiet as you can. Your leg will heal, but it'll take some time. I know it's painful, but I'll help you with that as much as possible."
Highland Healer Page 4
