'And she and Robert – no! Surely Daphne's mistaken! He would never be attracted to such a wicked girl!'
'Of course, I cannot presume to advise you, my dear, but if I were you I'd want to know what Robert intends.'
Mrs Manning stood up. 'And I do! I'm most grateful to you for undertaking what can't have been a pleasant duty. Leave it to me, Mrs Carstairs, and I will soon make sure he doesn't do anything foolish. I still have some influence over my son, even though he is nearing thirty!'
*
'You did really well, Kate. It won't be long before you qualify as an instructor, if that's what you want. Head for the aerodrome at Tamworth. We'll stop there for lunch.' Robert's voice came over the speaker tube, and Kate glanced down to check where they were. She altered course slightly, and confirmed the readings to Robert.
She had obtained her licence just the previous day, and Robert had insisted they celebrated. They were soon landing at Tamworth, and Robert took her arm and guided her to the clubhouse, where he had arranged for a car to be waiting.
'We're going somewhere special,' he said, and something in his tone made Kate glance up at him anxiously.
He'd never asked her about her life during the past months. He thought Phyllis had been an old friend from her schooldays, and had found her the job. Kate wanted to keep it that way. For most of the time in this new life she could push memories of John Wilson and Walter to the back of her mind. She still occasionally wrote to Maggie, but by now never expected a reply. Either Maggie had given her up, or, more likely, had moved and she'd never find her.
Robert drove to a restaurant a few miles away and they were soon seated at a small table in a square bay window overlooking gardens full of daffodils. Robert ordered, but chatted about neutral things until they had been served coffee. Then he fell silent for so long Kate thought he had forgotten her. She was about to speak when he stretched his hands across the table and clasped hers.
'Kate, I have something to ask you,' he said urgently. 'It's been difficult not to, but I wanted you to qualify first. I didn't want to spoil things, risk upsetting you. But you must have guessed how I feel about you.'
'You've been very kind,' Kate said quickly. 'I don't know why you should have done so much for me.'
'Because I love you. Kate, I want us to be together all the time. Is there any hope for me?'
Kate drew back, dragging her hands away from his light clasp. 'No! Robert, no, please!'
He was just like all the others! Like John Wilson! But she wasn't going to make that mistake again.
'Kate, my dear! What have I said to frighten you? If you don't love me, I can accept that, but please, don't look so terrified!'
Kate just shook her head. How could she explain?
'More coffee, Madam? Sir?'
Robert angrily waved the waiter away, and watched him cross the room.
'Kate, I don't want to press you, you're still very young, but some day I want to marry you. I love you, and want to share my life with you.'
She looked at him then, for a moment tempted. Incredibly, he meant marriage. That was something she'd never dared hope for. It would be heaven to be married to Robert, but how could she possibly accept? She was not the girl he thought. If he knew how gullible she'd been, what had happened to her, he would turn away from her in disgust.
'I can't!' she said, and a tear escaped from her eye. Angrily she brushed it away. 'We'd better get back. It will be dark soon.'
'Won't you tell me what's wrong, Kate? I wouldn't blame you, whatever it is.'
'No, Robert, please. I must get out of here!'
She stood up, tears streaming down her face, and for a second Robert sat looking up at her. She could have sworn his eyes were full of anguish as deep as her own, but she could never confess to him, and if she did he'd reject her at once.
Robert, without asking her, took the controls for the homeward journey. At Walsall, when he had driven her to her lodging, he spoke for the first time.
'I'll see you next Saturday, same time, Kate. Please, forget what happened today.'
As she watched him drive away she clenched her fists until the nails scored her flesh. He hadn't meant it. He must be glad she'd refused. But she lay sleepless all night wondering if there was any way round it. He could never marry her, they were too far apart, and she had ruined herself. But perhaps, if he knew what she was like, he might still want her without marriage? Could she face that sort of existence, once more risk the sort of rejection she'd suffered from John Wilson?
***
Chapter 13
It was late when Robert reached home. After leaving Kate he'd driven towards Birmingham, then, needing to walk off his emotions, he'd left his car in the driveway of his home and walked for miles through the Edgbaston and Harborne streets. At last, physically exhausted but knowing he would not sleep, he went back. He must at least rest before work tomorrow.
To his surprise there was still a light showing in the drawing room, and as he let himself in his mother appeared. 'Robert, come in here please.'
'Is Father worse?'
She didn't reply, but turned and went back inside the room. Robert followed her in. Then she turned and faced him.
'Shut the door please. I don't wish anyone else to hear this. Your father is the same, but if he learns what I have done today, especially as you gave him hope this morning that you might at last be about to ask Daphne to marry you, it will likely kill him.'
'What do you mean? I never said I was going to propose to Daphne Carstairs. How did he get that idea?'
Her voice rose. 'We've expected so much of you! Oh, if only I'd had more sons this might not have mattered so much! How could you, Robert? How could you disgrace us so? Consorting with a girl who's no better than a whore!'
He opened his mouth to reply, feeling the blood drain from his face. Remembering it was his mother, he suppressed the first hot words which came to him, gritted his teeth and tried to speak calmly. 'I think you had better explain what you mean.'
'I've heard, never mind how, that your pupil,' she almost spat out the word, 'this girl you are supposed to be teaching to fly, has a reputation as a whore and, what's more, a vicious liar! Yet you are proposing to disgrace the whole family and marry her!'
'In the first place, if we are speaking of Kate, she is no whore! In the second – '
His mother interrupted. 'How can you believe that when she's had a child, and she isn't wed?'
'Because I know her and you do not! Mother, who told you these lies? For lies they are! Who's been trying to cause mischief?'
'That needn't concern you. Someone reliable. It's enough that I believe the facts to be true.'
'No it is not enough!'
'Keep your voice down! Do you want your father to hear?'
Robert clenched his fists. 'Was it Daphne Carstairs?'
His mother smiled grimly. 'No, it was not. How could you think a well-brought up girl could even soil her thoughts with such filth?'
Robert kept his thoughts to himself. Maybe Daphne would not behave in such a fashion, but who else, he wondered, knew about him and Kate? And this rumour that she'd had a child? Could it have been Lionel? He knew something. He supposed the fellow might be jealous of him, for he seemed to love Kate too, but he was in Cambridge. The summer term had started. Angry as he was he believed his mother. She'd never lied to him, even when he was a child and had asked embarrassing questions. Deep down he respected her anxiety, if what she believed had been true, but she didn't know Kate, didn't know the facts.
Suddenly he realised that he did not know them fully either. His mother had calmed down somewhat and sat on the edge of a chair. She spoke more calmly, almost pleading with him.
'Robert, darling, you know we only want what's best for you. You can be important here in Birmingham, owner of a large factory, and you need a wife who can support you socially. Promise me you'll give up this girl?'
Consumed as he was with the distress he'd experienced with Kate
's refusal, and his determination not to give in, but to besiege her until she was the one to give way, this attempt to coerce him made his brittle temper splinter.
'I have absolutely no intention of giving up Kate! She's the only girl I've ever wanted to marry, and I swear I'll have her! You have no right to try and dictate to me about my marriage, Mother, and I doubt if Father would agree with you.'
'Your father knows nothing of this! I forbid you to even mention it to him!'
'Please believe that I have more sense than to upset him, Mother.' He tried to calm himself and speak without his anger showing. 'I should have moved to my own flat years ago. I'll go to an hotel tomorrow, while I am looking for one.'
'Robert! You can't! What will your father say?'
'You must tell him whatever you choose, Mother. You have caused this decision. I could not remain under the same roof while we disagree so fundamentally about what is, after all, my life. Now I must go to bed. Goodnight.'
She collapsed onto a chair and burst into sobs. He hardened his heart and went from the room. If he were forced to choose, he'd have Kate any time. But would she have him?
*
'I heard yesterday that Robert has moved to a flat,' Mrs Carstairs told Daphne as they were eating lunch. It was a hot June day and they were eating in the garden, under the shade of an old apple tree.
Daphne's heart began to race. 'Why?'
'Mrs Manning was a little vague, but from what she said I gathered they suspected he was preparing to get married. It seems his father is much better, back at work, and very cheerful, so that is the inference to be drawn. I believe the threat from that wretched girl has passed, or Mr Manning would certainly not be in such a cheerful mood. Have you seen Robert lately?'
Daphne shook her head. 'I've been rather preoccupied with examinations.'
'I imagine he knows that, and did not wish to distract you.'
Daphne did not reply. Did this mean he and Kate were to marry? Surely not. How could she make sure?
'We might ask them here,' Mrs Carstairs went on. 'I've been planning to have a garden party. The last Sunday in June will be ideal, since Norman and Stella will both be here. Can you help me write the invitations this afternoon, dear?'
'I can spare an hour, but Brian and I were going to tea with some friends.'
'Are you fond of Brian? He seems to be here all the time, and you spend many evenings with him. Would you like to be married to another doctor? I would have thought Robert a better match.'
Daphne was grateful to her mother for having passed on to Mrs Manning the information about Kate, but at the same time she disliked this probing into her feelings. It was bad enough wondering what Robert and Kate were doing, whether he had proposed to her, whether she had lost her last hope, without her mother constantly speculating.
She escaped to her room soon afterwards, but she wrote very few invitations. Most of the time she sat staring out of the window, agonising about Robert and Kate. He might have moved to a flat for all sorts of reasons, but if he had any intention of forgetting Kate and returning to her, surely he would have made some effort to see her. She could not share her mother's belief that Kate was no longer a threat. But what could she do about it?
*
Kate looked at the two columns of figures and frowned. The one on the left was so very much longer than the other. It totalled the amount she owed to Robert for the time he'd spent teaching her to fly, and the other listed the pitifully small sums she had insisted on giving to him every week. At this rate it would take years to pay him back, even without any interest. She wondered whether she ought to add more for the hire of his Tiger since she had obtained her licence. He insisted that now he was no longer teaching her, just taking her up for company, but most of the time she was actually doing the flying, and learning new skills. She hadn't paid Peter when she went up with him the previous weekend, would not have dared to offer. But Robert was different.
For over a month he had not again referred to his proposal, to her relief. Then yesterday, after they had been for a short flight to deliver some of Robert's new prototype instruments to an RAF airfield in Bedfordshire, for the RAF pilots to evaluate, he'd proposed again.
'Kate, I love you so much,' he'd said, and she believed him. She had wanted to accept. She loved him too, and knew now that it was a far deeper emotion than she had ever felt for John Wilson. He, she had concluded after much thought, had taken advantage of her loneliness.
She didn't try to excuse herself. She'd been weak and foolish, wicked and rash. Knowing Maggie's history should have made her more careful. It did no good to recall that on the first occasion John had made love to her she had been half-comatose with the drink and the champagne. That had been foolish too. And she need not have let him continue, but she had, and she would never get rid of the shame and regret.
Walter was another matter. He'd rescued her when she was destitute, and she'd really believed at the time that she'd have been willing to marry him out of gratitude. That had been foolish too. She would have been miserable, and Walter would soon have regretted his kindness, for they would have come to detest one another. But she had treated him badly, made no effort to please him, or comfort him when he had been unable to make love to her. She shuddered at the recollection of his frantic efforts, at the same time feeling grateful that they had come to naught.
She could never tell anyone about these times in her life. Maggie might understand, but she'd lost Maggie. Robert would turn away from her in utter disgust if she confessed to him, and that she could not endure. Better to avoid the necessity of such a confession by being resolute and refusing his proposal. He'd said last night that he would keep on asking her until she accepted, but she could not. It would be better for them both if she went away and he was able to forget her.
There had been no time to make any plans, and the idea of leaving Phyllis and Frank, starting yet again in a place where she knew no one, was something she dreaded. This time, though, she could find a job flying. With so many men pilots joining the RAF women were being employed to fly civil aircraft, and she had already begun to look for something.
First, though, she was to achieve one of her dearest ambitions today. Her heroine, Amy Johnson, was coming to Walsall to take part in a display of sailplaning, and as she was going with Robert, who was taking part in some of the events, she might even meet Amy.
She glanced at the small clock on the mantlepiece in her room. Almost nine. Robert had insisted they make an early start.
'There will be thousands coming to watch Miss Johnson, we have to be sure to get there early.'
Ten minutes later they were in Robert's Lagonda, approaching the aerodrome, and already the police and RAC officials were preparing for crowds. There were many spectators settling down for the day, both inside the aerodrome and in the fields around.
'I suppose they'll get as good a view from there, without having to pay,' Robert said, laughing.
Peter was there, and Robert left Kate with him while he went to check his Tiger. Peter grinned at her and slid some sheets of paper from his pocket. 'Here you are, the advertisement pages. I've marked suitable ones. Let me know if you have any interviews, and if I can help you by flying you to them I will.'
'You're being so good to me, Peter. I'm tremendously grateful!' Kate said as she took the sheets and stuffed them into her pocket.
'Well, I suppose you know what you're doing, but why on earth you don't want Manning to know, when it's as clear as glass he's nuts about you, I can't imagine.'
Kate just smiled and shook her head. She couldn't explain.
Soon they were absorbed in watching the crowds, motor cars stretching back in all directions as they queued to get into the grounds.
'They're hardly moving,' Robert, who had rejoined them, said. 'I swear that Bentley has been stuck on top of the canal bridge for the past ten minutes.'
Robert had brought a picnic lunch, but Kate was puzzled. 'This is not the same as you've broug
ht before,' she commented. 'It's a lot simpler.'
He laughed. 'Do you mind? I had to prepare it for myself.'
'Is your mother's cook ill?'
'No. I've rented a flat, I'm not living at home now.'
'You haven't quarrelled?' Kate said in alarm. She felt so guilty generally that she always imagined she had somehow caused every disaster. Had she been the cause of this?
'Of course not, but as my mother keeps reminding me, I am almost thirty, far too old to be still living with my parents. I lived away while I was at Cambridge, and working for other companies, of course, but when I came here to help Father, and had to spend so much time in Paris, it was too much bother to find a place of my own. You must come and see it.'
Kate shook her head, and was relieved that it seemed as though the demonstrations were about to start.
Without the wind upcurrents of aerodromes like Long Mynd, the gliders had to be towed aloft.
'That's a new one, a Kirby Kite,' Robert explained as Amy Johnson began the display. 'She must be at two thousand feet.'
Kate nodded. She was watching the glider circling the field, and gave a long, satisfied sigh as it swooped low over the crowd and made a perfect landing.
'A lot of people will have missed that,' Peter said, looking towards the entrance where there were still long queues.
The organisers had realised the same, and to everyone's delight Amy Johnson did a second flight.
'See that loop!' Kate exclaimed. 'I didn't know you could do that in a glider!'
'Is gliding as safe as she says?' she asked some time later after Amy had talked to the crowd, urging them to take up the sport, which was cheaper than powered flying and quite safe. 'I think I'd prefer having an engine.'
'Me too,' Peter agreed. 'I wonder what Mr Chambers will show us now?'
The rest of the afternoon passed with Kate in a glow of contentment. She insisted that Robert would have done as well as the Club Instructor in the aerobatics display, and was disappointed he did not win the handicap race, saying that the handicap had been too severe.
Can Dreams Come True? Page 28
