We’d see about that. “Sorry, I know it’s been hard on you.” I gestured to her belly. “He ok in there?”
“He’s fine.” She rubbed her belly affectionately. “His daddy is getting his balls chopped off as soon as he’s out though.” Shadow and I both winced. “We all need to rest some more.” Maria said as she struggled to her feet. “This hasn’t been easy on any of us. Let’s rest, sleep some more, gather our strength.”
I wasn’t sure if it was Tommy, Johnny or Kyle behind my beating, or all three, but I would find out and I would make them pay.
I would make them bleed.
My smile was full of dark promise as I dutifully closed my eyes. I felt Lela press her lips against my cheek as I drifted off to sleep.
One week later…
I was on the treadmill running what was usually my usual miles, miles I could run in my sleep with a full working body. Miles that now felt like I was running through mud with lead in my shoes and weights tied to my arms. Shadow stood in front of me timing me and I think also – waiting to catch me, if I fell off.
“Aaron, you’re supposed to be resting,” Lela shrieked from the doorway. I looked at Shadow who looked impassively back. I kept running. Sweat poured off my body, but I kept running. “Shadow, why are you just standing there?”
Shadow glanced at Lela then looked at me again. I kept running. “Pussy,” he muttered to me under his breath. “He needs to get stronger,” he answered to Lela.
“He needs to rest.” She was in the room now. Shadow pressed the stopwatch and declared time. I slowed down on the treadmill and then got off. We both headed to the pull up bar on the door.
“Ten?” Shadow asked me.
“Fifteen,” I stated.
“You’re both ignoring me?” Lela snapped with her hands on her hips.
“I’m not ignoring you, babe. Go back to bed.” I kissed her cheek as I nudged her towards my room. I considered the bar.
“You’ll not manage fifteen,” Shadow murmured. “You had two dislocated shoulders.”
I winked at him with my good eye. The swelling still hadn’t come down fully on my left eye yet. “Watch me.” I jumped up to grab the bar and pulled. The pain shot through my arms. Fuck. I clenched my teeth together and pulled myself up again, and again and again.
I hit fifteen. I was not graceful as I dropped down.
“You’re the most stubborn dick I have ever met, you know that?” Shadow leaned against the wall as he watched me.
“I did it.” I felt like I was going to fall over.
“You need help?” he offered.
“Nah. Just a shower. A few more days and I’ll be ready.” I nodded to myself. I flexed my arms – my muscles were straining but I just needed to be stronger.
“I need you strong and healthy, man.” He watched me.
“They all go down.”
He nodded in understanding and I headed to my room. Lela sat on the bed waiting.
“I need to shower. You wanna join me?” I asked her.
She flicked her hair over her shoulder as she glanced out of the window. “No? Ok then.” I closed the door behind me and started the shower. Gingerly, I stripped off my workout clothes and got under the hot spray. I glanced over my shoulder at the door and then seeing it was still closed, I sagged against the wall.
Pain swathed my body. I let my head droop. I gave myself a few moments and then pushing past it, I washed away the sweat and pain.
“I need to go to the hospital for the baby check-up,” Shadow told me as we stood in the kitchen the next day.
“Sure.” I was drinking coffee in between doing lunges. He was watching me while Maria was in bed resting. They had moved into the room Lela had been using. Clara was gone. She had refused to help care for me when I was ill, said I wasn’t family. Shadow had packed her bags and locked the door behind her. I was too stunned to comment; I couldn’t believe he had turfed his mom out. She was his mom. When I had tried to raise it, Maria had cautioned me not to. So, they had moved in with me, so Shadow could help me get stronger and Lela could help with Maria.
Lela was in sleeping with me, but all we had been doing was sleeping, since I was still in recovery. I also think she was mad at me although I wasn’t entirely sure why. I hadn’t the energy to ask and get strong again. I only had energy for one thing at a time.
She hadn’t mentioned her mom coming back from Hawaii and neither had I. I was waiting for her to leave though. Maybe that’s why she was mad – maybe she felt that she had to be here? I didn’t have the time to figure it out, I needed to be focused.
“Aaron.” I worked on the other leg as I moved over the living room floor. “Aaron!” I stopped mid-lunge and looked at Shadow.
“What?”
“Will you stop?” He came over to me. I looked at him as he approached. His tall frame and muscular build. His dark skin was covered in a sweater and jeans, he was clean shaven as always, his dark curly hair gelled back. He looked tired. Actually, he looked worse than me.
“You ok?” I straightened up.
“No. I’m not ok,” he snapped at me.
“Is Maria ok? The baby?” I rolled my head on my shoulders.
“I swear to God, I’m going to punch you.”
“What the fuck?” I stopped and looked at him. “What did I do?”
Shadow glared at me. “You’re going to kill yourself. You’re going to get me killed. You need to rest. You’re pushing too hard.”
“I’m getting stronger so we can fix this fuck up.” I gaped at him, was he serious right now? I was doing this for us. I had been in this house for almost two weeks. I was going crazy. Me being in the house, away from the circuit, hiding wasn’t helping us.
“You’re pushing too hard,” Shadow repeated. “I need you strong, not brittle. I’m going to the hospital with my wife, then I am going home to spend the afternoon with my wife. We all need a break.”
“Ok.” I ran my hand over my hair and shrugged. “Whatever man, just be careful.”
“You fix whatever is broken in there.” He tapped my head. I flinched from him and he froze. I shifted my feet nervously. Shadow recovered his shock and jerked his head towards my bedroom door. “Fix in there too.” I glared at him this time. He widened his eyes at me as he motioned his hand with me to get moving.
I made a face at him and began my lunges again. Growling in frustration, he picked me up. Actually, picked me up and carried me to my bedroom. Opening the door, he dumped me inside, closing the door firmly behind him.
I stared at Lela who was sitting on the bed reading a magazine. She looked at me in confusion. Her legs stretched out in front of her, her back resting against the headboard.
“What’s wrong?” she asked me.
I turned and opened my door, “Shadow is a giant asshole!” I yelled up the hall. His booming laughter could be heard from the spare room. I closed the door in disgust.
Lela was smiling and I realised it was the first time I had seen her smile since this had happened. I let out a long sigh.
“I need a shower,” I said with a smile. She nodded at me as the smile faded and she returned to the magazine. “Wanna join me?” I looked at her and she stared back at me. She licked her lips and glanced away uncertainly; I made my way over to her. At the foot of the bed, I stopped and looked at her. Getting on the bed I crawled up towards her, until I’d caged her body beneath me. I hovered in front of her, our gazes’ level with one another.
“Lela, wanna join me?” I asked her as I leaned in and kissed the corner of her mouth. Her hands came up and rested loosely on my arms. She didn’t say anything and simply stared at me. Her blue eyes searched mine, looking for…something. I kissed the other corner of her mouth. “Lela, I really need a shower and I want you in there with me.” I kissed her softly on the lips. I pulled back.
Nothing.
I sat back and looked at her, as her hands dropped to her sides.
I heard her gasp.
“Bruises fade Lela,” I muttered as I closed the bathroom door behind me.
I ran the water and stepped inside. Moments later the shower door opened. Slim arms wound their way round my chest and her head pressed into my back – she held me tight as she sobbed into me. I let the water pour over me as she let it all out. I turned her around and held her as she cried out all her fear. I whispered that it was ok, that I was fine and that she had nothing to be scared of. As I reassured her and kissed away her tears, soon they stopped, and I wasn’t saying anything anymore either.
“Are you sore?” Lela asked me. I laughed softly as I stretched. We were back in bed.
“Nope, like riding a bike.” She hit me in the ribs and I flinched. “I didn’t say you were the bike!” I laughed in protest. “Anyway, you were on top that time, doesn’t that make me the bike?” I laughed as she slapped me again.
“You’re so crass.” She still snuggled into my side and draped her leg over mine. “You didn’t overdo it though, I’m being serious.”
I kissed the top of her head. “I’m fine Brat. A good little workout, got some kinks out there that Shadow hadn’t quite reached. He was right to put me in here – I needed this kind of exercise.” She shot up beside me ready to hit me again. I was full out laughing this time and Lela pounced on me. “No, no, ok, I’ll stop. Don’t, I’ll stop.”
“You’re such a prick,” Lela protested as she settled beside me.
“I know.” My arm tightened around her.
“Will it be really bad when you go back?” Her voice was low as her fingers traced one of my tattoos. I stared at the ceiling.
“Yes.”
“How bad?”
“You need to go to your mom,” I answered, maybe a bit too harshly. I moved away from her and sat up. “Am I the reason you aren’t there now?” I looked down at her.
“Of course you are.” Lela looked up at me and then also sat up. She moved away and crossed her legs, pulling the bedsheet around her. “I couldn’t leave you like that.”
“You didn’t need to stay because of me, Lela. I told you bruises fade.” I got up and pulled on some sweatpants. “I don’t need your pity. You’d have been better off with your mom.” My smile was hard. “Skinner could have been enjoying your nightly pyjama displays. He’s always been a jerk off. Seeing you in those shorts would have given him wet dreams.”
“Fuck you,” Lela snapped at me.
“Just did that,” I answered flatly. “Twice? Three times? Hey, who’s counting?” I winked at her.
“You’re definitely feeling better,” Lela snapped. She grabbed her clothes and started putting them on. “I can’t believe you would say that to me!”
“What? That I was counting? You mean you weren’t?” I sat down as I watched her shimmy into her yoga pants. “I mean…I understand how you could have lost count…”
“Shut up.” Lela glared at me. “Don’t make this cheap sex talk.” She looked about the room wildly. She marched over to one of her bags and started searching through it. “You will not make us into some sort of fling thing.”
“Fling thing?” I leaned back into my chair as I laughed at her.
Lela spun to face me. “I said shut up.” She tied her hair back, then stilled suddenly. She glared at me. “I know what you’re doing.”
I ran my eyes over her. One day I would burn that fucking cardigan. Those yoga pants could fuck off too. My dick throbbed for her; she was addictive. I pulled my eyes off her body and met her eyes.
“What am I doing?” I asked her softly.
“Pushing,” she snapped. “Pushing me away.” She swiped her eyes. “It’s what you do. You push.”
“Do I?” I watched her as she sought composure, reining her temper back in.
“Yes!” She took a deep breath. “I almost fell for it.” Lela laughed lightly. “You bastard, I almost fell for it.” She glared at me, pulling me in as she fought to regain to control. It was hypnotising, watching her struggle.
I rose, crossing over to her. Pulling her into me, I kissed her fiercely. She didn’t resist and after a moment I felt her melt into me. “Go Lela, I need you to go.” My voice was rough as I kissed down her neck, then I ripped the cardigan off her.
“No.” Her hands circled my neck and held me close as I moved back to her mouth. She was going to get hurt if she stayed with me. I couldn’t protect her. In frustration, I turned her to face the wall and pressed into her back. I kissed her jawline, her neck, down across her shoulders, travelling down her spine.
“Lela, I can’t keep you safe,” I whispered quietly as I reached her lower back. I dipped my tongue into the two dimples she had at the curve of her spine as I ran my hands over her hips.
“Yes, you can.” She moaned as I pulled her yoga pants down. I nipped at her soft flesh with my teeth as I bared her skin. My hand slipped between her thighs, cupping her, dipping inside. Her moans had me groaning. I lost all rational thought when I was near her. She was my drug and I was scared I was becoming addicted to her. I needed her. I rose, pulling her hips roughly back from the wall. Bending slightly, I entered her in one stroke. She cried out as I thrust inside again. Christ, she fit around me perfectly. My left arm around her chest held her weight, while my right hand rubbed her in rhythm as I drove roughly into her from behind. We moved like animals, me biting her neck as I edged closer, her cries egging me on until I felt her entire body shuddering around me. Her arms snapped out to brace against the wall as her ass drove back into me, the movement enough to push me over the top as I slammed into her one final time.
Exhausted, we both sank to the floor.
“Shit,” I cursed, as reality came crashing back.
“What?” Lela was still catching her breath.
“I didn’t wear a rubber,” I muttered irritably. She made me lose my mind. Lose my control.
Lela was quiet and then pulled her legs closer to her. “I’m clean and on the pill,” Lela whispered softly. “I’ve never had unprotected sex before. I also had my annual health check just before I came here.”
“Ok.” I didn’t know what else to say. “Me too.” Smooth Aaron, real smooth.
“You’re on the pill?” Lela asked as she half turned.
“Shut up,” I muttered as I nudged her, easing the awkwardness. Lela snorted and then started laughing. After a moment, I joined her. I pulled her closer to me, wrapping my arms around her and burying my head in her hair as we lay on the floor, tangled together.
The next morning, I felt better. My swollen eye was almost able to fully open. Lela was curled into me, her head on my chest, my arm around her holding her close. I hadn’t heard Shadow coming back last night. I had woken in the middle of the night and noticed his car parked out front as I was getting a drink from the kitchen. Lela and I had spent most of the time in the bedroom. I stroked her hair in the darkness. She shifted slightly and her leg rubbed against mine. That brought my hard-on too close to her and I needed to get out of this bed and away from her, or else today would be spent in the bedroom too.
Not as stealthily as I would have liked, I slipped out of bed and headed to the bathroom. Once I had done what I needed, I entered the spare room. A few minutes later, I heard Shadow approaching from the hall and he came into the room closing the door behind him.
“I take it you made up?” He smirked at me as he pulled on a t-shirt.
“Seriously.” I eyed him as I began my run. “You’re a woman.”
“I thought it would make you less touchy,” he grumbled as he started the stopwatch and started picking up weights.
“How’d the appointment go?” I asked, rapidly changing the subject.
“Yeah all good. Maybe thinking of inducing soon.” He was focusing on the weight too much.
“A month early?” I questioned as I kept running, ke
eping my tone light.
“Yeah, but they said he’s a good weight and stuff.” Shadow switched arms. We continued in silence. I ran and he worked his arms.
After about ten or fifteen minutes, I had enough time to consider my moves. “I need more time to build my strength up.” I kept my pace steady.
Shadow put the weight down and rose to his feet. “Aaron.”
“You know it’s true. I need to gain strength so I can bend, not break. I had two fucking dislocated shoulders. Slow and steady wins the race.” I kept my pace. “Isn’t that what Frank used to tell you?” He nodded. “I think you need to get away from here – for a time.”
“I’m not leaving.”
“I think you need to get your pregnant wife out of Boulder. Let them think I’m broken, that I learned my lesson.” I kept running. “I’ll pay that fucking junkie and let them see me like this. I’ll get stronger. Have your boy, get your family safe.” Tommy had kindly told Shadow that he would wait for me to recover from my unfortunate accident before I needed to pay. However, my four weeks were up. I knew he wouldn’t take the payment from Shadow – no, they would want to see me broken in front of them – and I knew he wouldn’t wait much longer.
I slowed the machine and got off.
“I’m not leaving you here alone.” He crossed his arms.
“I’m not stupid. Let them think I got put in my place.” I wiped my face with my t-shirt. “I’ve been laying low for too long, I need to be out there. If we go out together, they’ll know we’re coming. With you out of town, no one will think I’m doing anything.” I watched him as he frowned at me. “Maria and your kid are all that matters.” I gestured at myself. “This? Nothing.” He instantly frowned. “I’m better, I’m healing. I’m not yet healed, but I will be. I need time. I’m rushing.” I shrugged as I sat down against the wall. “I can’t afford mistakes.”
Shadow sat across from me. “I can’t lose her.”
“Jesus, that woman would haunt me if I was careless enough to let you lose her,” I grunted, as he beamed. “Soulmates, right?”
Dark Heart Page 30
