‘Hello Nathan, how are you?’
‘I’m not too bad thanks, bit tired. I just wanted to know how the children got on today? It feels a bit strange not being able to see them.’
‘They were fine, Josh is a bit quiet, but we’re trying to bring him out a bit, just taking baby steps.’
‘So you were a teacher in Blackpool, is that correct?’
‘Yes, I was working at St. Augustines Secondary School, just two hundred yards from the camp, on Chapel Street.’
‘Were you at work when the bombs hit?’
‘Yes, after the panic had died down, the school was left with thirty children whose parents didn’t collect them, so I kept them at the school until it was safe to come out. We were set up there really, with plenty of food and water on the premises, it’s just the children were expecting their parents to collect them, and they didn’t turn up.’
‘What happened to those children?’
‘The army came and searched the school, they brought us to the camp, we were some of the first to arrive, long before it looked like this.’
Lauren pushed her cigarette butt against the rusting metal of the tower eye, and smiled at me. ‘Is that your last one?’ I asked.
‘Yes, I should quit really, I had been six months off them before all this happened, I’ve just relapsed. Needed something to help me de-stress.’
‘If you ever need to talk, I’ll be more than happy.’
‘Oh thanks, that’s lovely.’
‘So is your other half in the camp?’
‘No I’m single, I have been for a while now.’
‘Oh sorry, I didn’t mean to pry. I thought-with the Mrs and not Miss.’
‘I didn’t like the way I was judged for not being married, so I have always been known as Mrs.’
‘So have you never been married?’
‘There was someone, a while ago now. He didn’t want children though, which was the nail in our relationship, it’s just a shame it took us thirteen years to realise it.’
‘So you don’t have any children?’
‘Not of my own, but I’ve got hundreds now, orphaned by this war. Emma told me what happened to her mum, I’m sorry to hear that.’
‘Thank you Lauren, it was a few years ago now, and a completely different lifetime.’
I said good night, and headed back to the camp, where my team was still around the fire, and sat down to warm myself as I wrote up today’s diary. After which I will get my team to bed early, Sergeant Davis was adamant I should.
28/11/2027 - Time 22:20
With a little persuasion, I got my team to bed around eleven, and got to sleep after a few minutes listening to Cox and his team, still drinking around the fire. I was woken suddenly by the sound of machine gun fire, and explosions. The camp was under attack, I crawled out of my tent, still half asleep, and tried to focus, as other recruits emerged from their tents. Explosions lit up the sky, and bullets flew over my head, I stayed on my hands and knees, scrambling around in the ash and dirt. I could see one man a hundred yards away with a machine gun, which he had over his head, and was firing into the sky, as another was shouting at us. Explosions rattled my ears, fusing my senses as my eyes got used to their surroundings. I slowly realised, we weren’t under attack, the man barking at us was Captain Jones. ‘Get out of your fucking tent you piece of shit,’ he shouted, as Hassan crawled out and joined the rest of us. ‘Everyone move over to Lieutenant Higginson, and await your orders’ he shouted, grabbing one man by the arm and hauling him across the floor on his knees. I glanced at my watch, which said 2:11 am We had only been asleep a few hours, before they woke us for the next exercise. The parade ground was covered by a large black inflatable container, like a paddling pool, full of water. We were told to climb in, crawl on our bellies through the water, and climb out the other side. Machine guns were fired over our heads and the soldiers shouted abuse at us, spraying us with freezing water from a water cannon. If I had been half asleep waiting for my turn, I was wide awake when I hit the water. It took my breath away, like I was being repeatedly punched. The water covered me, splashing into my face and drenching my clothes. When I climbed out of the other side, I was told to line up with the others, and wait for my turn again. With the freezing clothes clinging to our bodies, we stood in lines, shivering, while trying to keep warm, as they continued to spray us with water, and fired their weapons in the air. ‘Back into the water Driver’ yelled Captain Jones, pushing me towards the obstacle. ‘Get your fucking face in the water.’ We all repeated the exercise five times, before they moved us on the next task. We had to stand in rows, and complete the cardiovascular exercise we did yesterday, but this time they sprayed us with cold water, and took the sledging to a whole new level. No one was given an easy ride, we were all pushed to our limits. When we had finished, we were moved to the large medical tent on the edge of the parade ground, that had been erected last night. There, we found a large table with eleven chairs around it. On the table were large sheets of foil, which we were ordered to wrap around our bodies after we had stripped our wet clothes off. We sat shivering in the tent for what seemed like an age, unable to talk or communicate, I think some men had gone into shock. I’ve never been as cold in my life, I couldn’t think straight, and I couldn’t stop shaking. They had dry clothing ready for us, which I changed into, but I made the mistake of thinking this part of the exercise was over, it wasn’t, we were given just about enough time to dry off, and our body temperature reach a more acceptable level, before we were thrown straight back into the exercise. The look on the men’s faces, when they realised what was happening, was one of despair. We were dragged into the cold, and ordered to get back in the water, it was torturous. We were so cold, I couldn’t think of anything else. They sprayed us with more freezing water, and humiliated us, I don’t think I could focus on any individual, to judge how he was coping, I was just too tired and cold. When we had finished the next round, we were sent back into the medical tent to change our drenched uniforms for the second time. In there I spoke to a few men, who said they’d had enough, and planned to leave. I couldn’t really argue with them, I wasn’t entirely sure it was worth it. When we got outside, Captain Jones ordered us to line up on the parade ground. ‘I have heard there are those of you who wish to leave now’ he shouted, walking along the line, staring at each individual recruit he past. ‘If you are, fucking leave now, because you cannot handle what’s to come, I can guarantee you that.’ He walked over to the bell as he continued, ‘Come and ring the loser bell if you want to leave, and stop wasting all our fucking time.’ Two men, Stansfield and Phillips, left the line and walked up to the bell. ‘You want to leave Phillips?’
‘Yes Captain Jones, I’m sorry-’
‘Shut the fuck up and ring the bell, I want you off the parade ground.’
Phillips rang the bell, and made his way.
‘Stansfield, so you’re going to leave too are you? Abandon your men when they need you the most, you’re a joke, look at the size of you, do you want your mum?’
‘I cannot be arsed listening to this bullshit, and-’
‘Ring the bell then and be on your way, we have no room for mamas boys.’
Stansfield rang the bell, and left as briskly as Phillips had, I felt sorry for the pair of them, I don’t understand the reason for humiliating them like that, this is not a regular army, or war. We wouldn’t be trying to join the army under normal circumstances, but I suppose they have a protocol they follow, and they aren’t diverting from it. More vehicles arrived, just as the sun tried to break through the ash blanket covering our sky. It was six am and we were moving onto our next objective. We climbed aboard the vehicle’s and tried to get comfortable, much like yesterday they kept us awake through the journey, singing songs and shouting at us. We ended up on the beach again, but this time we headed straight down towards the sea, which finally came into view after a few minutes. The sea looked dark, and was covered by a top layer of scum and congealed b
lack ash. They positioned us in a line, two metres from the tide, and marched us into the water. ‘Forward’ shouted Captain Jones, staying a few yards behind us, so he could watch us all. ‘One, two, three. Down into the push up position, on your hands now.’ The water was half way up our arms, freezing cold and stunk. They made us do push ups, as each wave hit the group. ‘Down’ ordered Captain Jones, as the first wave smashed into us. ‘Back up. Down, face in the water Hassan, and back up.’ As the waves hit, we were ordered to put our face in, and stay under for around seven seconds. The water was freezing, and the salt and grit went up my nose and in my mouth and eyes. It was torture, like water boarding, next they made us lie on our backs, as the water rushed over us, giving us the sensation of drowning. It was horrendous, our already tired and battered bodies, struggled through, shivering, as all our remaining strength was washed out to sea. Not knowing when the wave was going to hit us was the worst thing, just waiting for it to rush over our heads. I’ve never been as cold as I was during the exercise, right through to the bone. I wanted to stop, but I wouldn’t, I believed I could handle everything they threw at me, did I come close to quitting? I don’t think I did. I just continually looked ahead, completing each task as it came, eventually we would finish. We were moved out of the water, up to the sand dunes by the top of the beach, half an hours walk. There we sat down in a row, arms linked as we tried to regain our warmth, somewhat protected from the blustering winds by the dune cover.
‘We have a reward for you’ said Captain Jones, with a wry grin. ‘Climb up to the top of the sand dunes.’ The men wearily stood up, lifting their aching limbs up the hill. At the top, we overlooked the beach, as the wind barrelled across the open land. ‘Right men, roll down the hill’ Captain Jones ordered. ‘One at a time.’
‘How the fuck is this a reward?’ I thought to myself, but to be fair, it certainly warmed us up. We took it in turns to roll our knackered bodies down the hill, one recruit even managed to injure his back in the process, and end up in first aid. After we’d taken turns rolling down the sand dunes, we were moved further down the beach to where the next exercise had been set up. The sleep deprivation in the group was evident in every face I looked at, we were shivering, tired and hungry. The new task involved splitting into our teams, and lying on the floor as a large, heavy wooden log was placed across us. We all had to hold it above our torso, for five minute periods. Those minutes became an agony for the recruits, who were already close to their breaking points. Hassan asked to be seen by the medical officer, and was taken back to the vehicles. All the men dug in, and pushed through the pain barrier, to complete the task. After around an hour of lifting on our backs, we were ordered to carry the logs to a set point, a mile down the beach. Hassan arrived back, and we lifted the log onto our shoulders, and marched the mile, hopeful it would be our last exercise of the day. There were screams of pain from every recruit during the march, as the pressure on our shoulders grew to an unmanageable level. When we arrived at the rally point, and put the logs down, I could barely stand up straight, I was in so much pain. Captain Jones asked us to gather around for an update, ‘We have lost a further two recruits’ he shouted, as I looked around the group worried that one might be Hassan. ‘McGowan and Lee. They handed in their resignation in before leaving for this exercise. If anyone else wants to go, now is the time.’ He looked around the group, pausing a moment to see if anyone would take him upon his offer, but they didn’t. ‘This race is not an individuals race, you are not one, you are a whole. This is a two mile run, you have eighteen minutes to complete the race, as a team. A fell run across the top of the sand dunes, finishing with a sprint back across the beach.’ The group had been massively depleted, down to five in Team Red and seven in Team Blue. We all set off at a good pace, following the red markers through the sand dunes, across the top of the beach. Running up and down the paths, once used by holiday makers, carrying their buckets and spades, through the long grass. As we ran, I spoke to Cox about what Captain Jones had said, that we are one team now. He agreed we should finish together, and we would have to push every recruit to the finish line. Hassan was already around thirty yards behind the main pack, I told Cox to wait at the halfway point, and I dropped back to help him. We were all completely wrecked, cold and hungry. I told Hassan this would be the final task, although I didn’t really know, I just wanted him to have something to aim for. Sweat was pouring off his face, and he didn’t look well, but he was determined to finish, which impressed me. At the halfway point, we met the others and had a couple of minutes rest, before setting off across the beach. We ran together, linking arms, helping each other, pushing each other. We crossed the line as one, exhausted, and desperately in need of some food and water. I had no idea if we had finished within the eighteen minute time frame, but I doubt it. We were loaded back into the vehicles, and headed back to the camp. As we drove past the hotel, I had a look where Lauren would stand for a smoke, but she wasn’t there. We pulled up outside the parade ground, and left the vehicles, some heading to the medical tent, some to their own. Outside each tent, was a large army rucksack, with a L85A2 - Carbine Rifle leaning against it. Inside the bag was a change of clothes, a sleeping bag, first aid kit, a bottle of water and knife. Bernard turned up with my diary, and had a chuckle at the state we were all in. ‘So they’re not going easy on you’ he laughed.
‘It doesn’t look like it’ replied Hassan, struggling to get his boots off. After thirty or so minutes, Captain Jones arrived, as the other recruits joined us from the medical tent. With him was Lieutenant Higginson and Second Lieutenant Jackson. ‘Line up men’ shouted Captain Jones, as the recruits climbed up from their places, trying to get their aching limbs working again. ‘We are to move out in five minutes, a ten mile walk before camping down for the night.’
‘This is bullshit’ shouted one recruit, to the obvious shock of everyone else. ‘I’m not doing this anymore, what’s the fucking point? We’re not real recruits, it’s ridiculous.’
‘Who the fuck do you think you’re talking to? Captain Jones retorted, as the man left the line, and started to walk towards the hotel. ‘Ring the loser bell, and you can fuck off.’
‘I’m not ringing any bell’ he said, continuing to walk. Lieutenant Higginson and Second Lieutenant Jackson followed, aiming their guns at him as Captain Jones spoke. ‘You will ring the bell, or you’ll find yourself in prison. This is the army, not a fucking kindergarten. You must think we are a set of slack jawed fuck wits, get back over here and ring the bell, then you can fuck off.’
The man nervously turned around, and walked back towards us, with rifles still trained on him. He moved to the bell, gave it a ring, and continued on towards the hotel. ‘Right’ shouted Captain Jones, ‘Do anymore of you pieces of shit want to quit? Or can we get on with the next task?’
With no response, he ordered us to collect our belongings, and form a line behind him. It was just after six pm, and a ten mile walk carrying all our stuff would take a good three to four hours. Which means we wouldn’t be settling down any time before ten, which was disheartening to say the least. ‘Your carbine rifle is now an extension of you, sleep with it, eat with it, I don’t want to see you without it. Let’s get moving’ said Captain Jones, as the last recruit took his place at the back of the line. We set off at a brisk pace, a speed most recruits were struggling to keep to, after their days excursions. It seemed strange to me that Captain Jones was taking part in this ten mile walk, he hadn’t been involved in any of the previous exercises, and had left everything physical to his younger lieutenants. And sure enough, after we had walked for about a mile, following the beach away from the centre of Blackpool, Captain Jones stopped us at a grassy opening, where a makeshift camp had been set up. ‘At ease men, this is where we are going to camp down for the night.’
‘There was a little silent rejoicing among the recruits, when they realised they weren’t about to walk a further nine miles. ‘You have shown me the commitment I wanted’ continued
Captain Jones. ‘After such a challenging day, to then be told you are walking a further ten miles, tired, hungry, many of you in pain. You still gave me your commitment to walk ten miles, and for that I am impressed with each one of you. Here is where we will sleep, just in your sleeping bags.’
‘Will there be any food?’ Adrian asked, a question all the men were wondering.
‘No, you have a bottle of water, that is your lot for today. Dismissed.’
As most men unpacked, got into their sleeping bags and settled down, I got out my diary to fill in the days events.
30/11/2027 - Time 10:20
We managed to get around seven hours sleep before the soldiers woke us yesterday morning, it did us good but we were still tired. Add to that, a mixture of injuries and aches and pains, I think most recruits were coming to the end of what they could tolerate. They ordered us to pack our belongings, ready for off in five minutes. When I saw Hassan, crawling out of his sleeping bag, I was taken aback by how much weight he had lost, although he didn’t look happy about it. ‘I’m not sure I can take another day of this’ he said, as he finished putting his rucksack together. He stood up, and slung his rifle over his shoulder, before following me to line up with the rest of the recruits. He certainly wasn’t his jolly self, that Hassan has long since departed, no one was cracking jokes to be fair, everyone carried the look of misery as we listened to Captain Jones. ‘Morning recruits, I trust you had a good sleep, today’s going to be just as hard a day as yesterday. We move out in five minutes to our first exercise, are there any questions?’
Aftermath: The Complete Collection (Books 1 & 2) Page 31
