She was wearing a thin-strapped yellow tank and white capris. Her flip-flops matched her shirt and gave him an unobstructed view of her coral-painted toes. Sexiest feet in Vegas, he thought, again feeling stupid for the gut-level turn-on that he couldn’t control. Apparently he hadn’t outgrown his fatal flaw. Attraction to a deceitful woman had cost him big time and here he was again.
“So what did you want to talk about?” she asked. “You made your feelings pretty clear. As far as I’m concerned, there’s nothing left to say.”
“Maybe you don’t think so, but I wasn’t finished when you walked out the other day.” He forced himself to relax his grip on the coffee mug in front of him. “Would you like something?”
“Just to get this over with.” Her big brown eyes were defensive and still as beautiful as ever.
“Okay, then.” He met her gaze and asked the question that had been gnawing at him since she’d left the E.R. “If she’s my child—”
“Your daughter’s name is Annie.”
Without acknowledging that, he continued, “Why didn’t you tell me I was going to be a father?”
She let out a breath and her gaze wandered out the window, to the congestion of cars on Eastern, waiting to turn left onto the Beltway. It was cool inside, but he knew on the street it was still more than a hundred degrees. This was Vegas and it was July. Hot was a way of life. But hot didn’t do justice to how he felt.
“Do you remember the last time we were together?” she asked, sliding into the place across from him.
“Yeah.” Of course he did. “One minute everything was fine, the next you said we were done. A guy doesn’t tend to forget something like that.”
One corner of her mouth curved up, but not from amusement. “A guy like you doesn’t forget because you’re always the one who ends things. It was different with me and that bothered you.”
The fact she was right didn’t help. He liked women, and they returned the favor. He did end things before anyone got serious. So sue him. But with Em he hadn’t been ready for things to be over.
“It came out of left field.” That’s all he’d admit.
Her eyes looked big and brown. Innocent and hurt. “Were you there for the last conversation we had?”
Maybe. “Refresh my memory.”
“I know how you feel about commitment.”
“We never talked about it,” he protested.
Her expression was heavy on the scorn. “Every woman at Mercy Medical Center and probably the Las Vegas metropolitan area knows you don’t make promises.”
“Being a doctor is a demanding profession.”
“I’m not talking about dinner and a show on Saturday night. Your aversion to responsibility, liability, obligation or dedication on a long-term basis is legendary. You’re as shallow as a cookie sheet.”
“That’s harsh.”
“But true. I knew that when we first went out. I was fine with it. I didn’t want anything permanent, either. It worked as well for me as it did for you. Maybe more.”
“So what was this conversation we had?”
“All I said was—wouldn’t you like to have children someday? You’re a pediatrician, and it’s not a stretch to assume that you might want to have one of your own.”
“Okay.” He vaguely remembered.
“Do you recall your response?”
“Not in detail.”
“I do.” Shadows made her eyes darken even more. “You did five minutes straight on what wasn’t going to happen. And I quote, ‘Nothing could compel me to ever tie myself down in any way. If you want to get on the commitment train, I’ll see you off at the station.’ You told me you never wanted strings. In a fairly firm and deep voice you added, ‘There’s no set of circumstances known to man that could make me change my mind.’”
Ouch. Yeah, he remembered now. The speech should be familiar since he’d given it so many times. “Okay.”
Frowning, she tipped her head, studying him as if he was an alien from another world. “I was trying to gently bring up the fact that I was pregnant. Your stay-single-or-perish soliloquy didn’t exactly make it feel safe to do that.”
“It’s not about comfort. It’s about what was right. Maybe I was a jerk—”
“Maybe?”
He ignored that. “Any time after that you could have called, dropped me a line, left a message on the answering machine. Something to the effect—‘Cal, I’m going to have a baby. Thought you should know. Catch you later.’”
It wouldn’t be the first time a woman tried to manipulate him by lobbing the pregnancy bomb. One that turned out to be a lie, the first of many before it had finally ended.
Emily looked small and tense in the big booth across from him. He couldn’t see her hands, they were in her lap. He remembered that when she was nervous, she twisted her fingers together. Peeking under the table to see if that had changed wasn’t happening.
“In your world—a man’s world—that would be the way. But not in mine. You made it clear how you felt and there was no way I was going to burden my baby with a father who didn’t want her.”
Sounded pretty cold when she said it like that. “You didn’t give me a chance to react with all the facts. If I’d known you were pregnant, we could have talked about it—”
“You talked. I listened and got the message. So shoot me for not wanting to hear any more.”
“Until now,” he reminded her, his gaze sliding to her breasts.
“Yeah.” She shifted her shoulders as if to relieve the tension and keep from shattering. “When I found the lump, it forced me to go to the bad place and think about what would become of Annie without me.” She met his gaze. “Her biological father—commitment-phobe and all—is the lesser of two evils.”
“Careful, flattery like that will turn my head.” The words oozed sarcasm because her low opinion of him rankled.
He was a stand-up guy; he saved lives every day. Some women actually called him a hero. Emily wasn’t one of them. The lesser of two evils is still evil.
“Look, Cal—” She settled her hands on the table, twisting her fingers together in that all-too-familiar way. “What you and I think of each other is irrelevant. Annie’s future and her welfare are the only things that matter.”
“Have you seen the specialist?” he asked, pushing away any reference to a child he still couldn’t believe was his.
“Not yet. My appointment is next week. With my primary care physician. A majority of sites on the Internet that I checked said that’s the place to start. I’m seeing Rebecca Hamilton. She delivered Annie.”
He hated to admit it, but that was the other reason he’d called. In spite of what she’d done—what she was trying to do—the thought of Emily being sick bothered him. But what if she was lying about the lump?
“What is it you want from me, Em?”
“I don’t want anything.”
He gripped his half full mug of cold coffee. “How do I know the baby is mine?”
“I’m more than willing to do a DNA test if that will put your mind to rest.”
He didn’t think there was a test in existence that would do that, not since seeing her again. “That would probably be a good idea. I’ll set it up.”
“Okay, then.” She nodded.
“Okay.”
If she was trying to pull a fast one, she wouldn’t agree so easily to the test. That silenced some but not all of his doubts because being made a fool of wasn’t high on his list of things to ever do again.
He’d been a teenager the last time a female had worked him over. She’d said she was pregnant and he’d believed her, married her. Months went by and she didn’t show, although she jumped his bones at every opportunity. When he found out there was no baby, he knew she’d been trying to get pregnant. Her lie was exposed but he also believed her when she said she’d done it for them, so they could be together. He’d also taken it seriously when he vowed to stay together for better or worse. And worse was what he got. A
fter that she got more creative with manipulation while their marriage died a slow and painful death. When that chapter of his life was over, he’d erased the word commitment from his vocabulary.
Ever since, he’d been careful about protection during sex. Because it bordered on obsession, the thought of a child had never occurred to him. That still didn’t absolve Emily of fault here. She’d had a duty, an obligation, to tell him that she was going to have a baby. Too much time had passed for him to believe the child was his. She was just another woman trying to make him dance to her tune.
“So we’ll wait and see what the test says,” he told her.
“I have no doubt that it will confirm what I’m telling you. And I’m sorry I waited so long to do that. But I need to know she’ll have her father to take care of her. If the need arises. I’m not asking for myself, but for Annie.”
“So we have a plan.”
“We do.” She slid out of the booth. “Let me know when and where to take her for the test.”
He stood and looked down at her. “Okay.”
She nodded and turned away, walking between the row of booths and the swivel seats at the counter. His gaze dropped to the unconsciously sexy sway of her hips. Something tightened inside him, an ache he hadn’t even been aware was there.
“Em?”
She stopped and looked back at him. “What?”
And he said something that hadn’t consciously crossed his mind. “I want to see your daughter.”
Chapter Two
Emily paced the living room of her ground-floor apartment waiting for Cal. Could have knocked her over with a feather when he’d called for a meeting. As angry as he was, she hadn’t expected a father/daughter face-to-face until the DNA was done, so his asking to see Annie had really surprised her.
She heard an enraged wail coming from the hall and hurried to find Annie crawling—at least trying to—out of her bedroom. The little girl was in a sleeveless, white, full-skirted, lacy dress, which obviously felt like parent torture. Her knees kept getting caught up in the hem, which minimized forward progress and maximized frustration. Judging by the decibel level of the cry, her frilly frock was getting on the only nerve she had left.
Em picked up the dynamic bundle of energy. Her golden curls framed a round face with huge blue eyes and healthy, rosy cheeks.
“Hey, baby girl. I’m sorry about the dress. It’s not your style, but your daddy will be here any minute and I know you want to impress him. Put your best foot forward, so to speak. Tough to do when you’re not quite walking, but you get my drift. Dazzle him with your abundant charm, which you get from him, by the way.”
“Unh,” Annie responded, then wiggled and squirmed to be let down.
Emily complied. Carefully, she set the child on her feet, holding on to a chubby hand while Annie promptly plopped on her behind. “Putting your best foot forward needs some work, baby girl.”
When she tried to crawl, her knee got tangled up in the skirt again and there was a screech that could shatter glass or set off all the dogs in the neighborhood.
Grabbing her up, Em said, “Just a little longer, sweetie. After you meet him, I’ll slip you into something more comfortable. It’s almost bedtime and you’re not at your best, but Daddy had to work at the hospital until seven. He’s a doctor, kiddo. A kiddo doctor in the emergency room. That means he only works on kids. You’re gonna love him. And how could he not love you.” Annie rubbed her nose on Em’s shoulder leaving a slick trail of something viscous.
Em sighed at the gooey spot. “Good thing I’m not trying to impress him. You’re the one he’s coming to see.”
She’d lost count of Annie’s wardrobe changes for this auspicious occasion. Meeting your father for the first time was a big deal. Not that Em would know because she’d never laid eyes on her own dad. But surely a lady needed to look her best for something like this.
Em was well aware that she was the reason this meet and greet hadn’t happened sooner and the consequences were hers to live with. But the guilt could just get in line with all the other guilts over the many mistakes she’d made. Unlike some of them, this one could be corrected. Better late than never.
The harsh sound of the bell made Em’s stomach drop as if she were riding the down loop on a roller coaster. The good news was that it got Annie’s attention and she stopped grunting and twisting to escape. “Here we go, sweet pea.”
She carried the baby to the peephole and peeked through to establish a positive visitor ID, although Cal was right on time. When she saw him, her midsection knotted and she let out a long, bracing breath before unlocking and opening the door.
“Hi, Cal.”
“Em.”
She’d expected him to be in hospital scrubs, but he’d changed out of work clothes into jeans and a baby-blue shirt with actual buttons, not a T-shirt. The shade brought out the color of his eyes, his daughter’s eyes. Maybe, just maybe, this meet and greet was important to him, too.
“Come in,” she said, stepping back to pull the door wide before shutting it against the glare of the sun descending in the evening sky. “It’s hot out there.”
And in here, she thought, looking up at him. The view gave her no relief from the heat. It had been a while, but her body was still susceptible to him. Once upon a time his charm had snagged her heart, but the present vibe wasn’t particularly charming so she could only assume the man himself got to her. That was too depressing to think about. And this visit wasn’t about her.
Time to make long-overdue introductions.
She glanced at her daughter who was sucking on her index finger and staring uncertainly at the tall stranger. “Cal, this is Annie.”
He studied her intently for a long time. Em wasn’t aware of holding her breath, but let it out when he did the same.
“You didn’t mention that she looks like me,” he said, not taking his eyes from his daughter.
“Would you have believed me?”
“Probably not.” His gaze slid to hers and turned resentful. “My hair was that color when I was little. The eyes are like mine. Even this,” he said, reaching out a finger to gently touch the indentation in the little girl’s chin that was identical to his own.
Annie ducked away and buried her face in Em’s neck. “She’s a little shy.”
He nodded without saying anything and Em wished she could read his mind. Had he been hoping she’d lied? Or did the idea of having a child make him want to puff out his chest and buy a round in the pub?
“Do you want to hold her?” she asked.
“Yeah.” He held out his arms and took Annie from her.
Her only intention was to make up for lost father/daughter time and she wanted it to be perfect. She should have known better. Life had been throwing her curve balls as far back as she could remember. This was no different.
Annie squirmed when he tried to settle her on his forearm. Tiny hands pushed against that wide chest and attempted to twist out of his strong grasp. Then she took one look at his face, started crying hysterically and frantically held out her hands to Em for a rescue.
“She wants you.” His voice could freeze water on a Las Vegas sidewalk in July.
Em took back her baby and felt the little girl relax. Not so the unflappable E.R. doc who looked like someone had hacked his stethoscope in half. “Don’t take it personally, Cal. She just needs to get to know you.”
“And whose fault is it that she doesn’t?”
The cutting remark hit its mark and guilt flooded her yet again. When Em felt cornered, out came the scrappy teenaged kid who’d once survived on the streets. “Look, I already admitted screwing up and apologized for it. I won’t say I’m sorry again. Annie is like this with strangers, and frankly I think it’s a good thing.”
“It’s good that she doesn’t know her own father?” His eyes narrowed on her.
“Not exactly. I just meant that it’s not a bad thing for her to be wary of people she doesn’t know. Until she gets to know them,
to separate the wheat from the chaff.”
“Is that supposed to make me feel better?”
“Frankly, I can’t afford to worry about how you feel.” That wasn’t to say she didn’t worry, but it wasn’t the best use of energy. “My priority is Annie.”
“Mine, too, now that I know about her.”
“So you really do believe she’s yours? Do you still want a DNA test?”
“Yeah.” He dragged his fingers through his hair. “Just to be sure.”
“You don’t have a lot of faith in your fellow human beings, do you?”
Before he could respond in the affirmative, the bell rang again. It startled the two adults, but also pulled Annie out of whimper mode.
“Excuse me.” Em peeked out and recognized the young girl. “I have to answer this.”
She opened the door and when Annie saw who was there she smiled and held out her arms.
“Hi, sugar.” The green-eyed, redheaded seventeen-year-old grinned then grabbed Annie and planted kisses on both chubby cheeks, making her laugh. “How’s this little girl?”
“Who wants to know?” Cal asked.
Em knew by the tone he was annoyed and had a pretty good idea why. If she’d been in his shoes it would tick her off that her child went easily to someone else and treated her like a serial killer. But that couldn’t be helped.
“Cal, this is Lucy Gates. Lucy, meet Dr. Cal Westen.”
The teen looked from one to the other, then at the child in her arms. “FOB?”
Cal frowned. “Friends of Bill?”
“Father of baby,” Emily translated.
Nodding, he studied Lucy. “And you are?”
“One of my girls,” Emily said, and knew from his skeptical expression that an explanation would be necessary. “This five-unit building was donated by Ginger Davis of The Nanny Network. With grants and donations, I run a program that mentors and houses teenage mothers. It’s called Helping Hands and assists young women who have nowhere else to go. They help each other raise their babies while getting an education. Children can’t be taken care of if their mothers can’t take care of themselves.”
The Doctor’s Secret Baby Page 2
