by Cooper Davis
“Look, let’s talk about this proposed mating arrangement. You know what the elders are suggesting,” Hayden said smoothly. Keep up the interrogation, make him answer the questions, he coached himself. “How would you see it working logistically? You’re obviously straight.”
Josh kept quiet, maintaining Hayden’s gaze with steady, magnetic force, but Hayden wasn’t about to be daunted. “Not going to answer?” he asked, hating how bitter his tone sounded. “No? Well, let me rephrase the question for the ladies and gentlemen of the jury. You, Joshua Peterson, are a well-known man about town. All the nearby towns, as a matter of fact. I’ve seen the evidence with my own eyes, oh, at least half a dozen times. You with your tongue down some hot chick’s throat. So how does the elders’ plan fit into the equation, you lifemating with a man? With me?”
“I will be completely monogamous if we move forward with the bonding. I can assure you of my intentions.” Josh inclined his head with a downright gallant gesture. One that seemed genuine and heartfelt. Hayden grew instantly erect in response, returning an eager salute.
“And those women?” Hayden shifted his hips subtly, trying to get his cock to settle back down. “How do you plan for us to…well, if I can get crass about it, we obviously have to seal our deal at least once for the bond to engage between us. And you know how linked we’ll be after that. Always in each other’s heads, each other’s fur. Shit, like twenty-four seven we’ll be feeling the bond.”
Josh smiled, blushing a little. “I wouldn’t mind.”
Hayden rubbed his eyes, looking away. Damn, what was going on here? “Josh, again…you’re straight.” He looked back at Josh. “You honestly think you can lay down with me one time?”
“I could and will give you whatever you desire in the physical area of our mating,” Josh said with touching earnestness, then lowered his voice to husky timbre. “I promise to be as gentle as I am eager.”
“Eager?” Hayden repeated, feeling dazed.
Josh gave one firm nod. “Very. I would do everything in my power to satisfy and please you as a mate. And not just once.”
An intense rush of adrenaline hit Hayden’s face so hard that his eyes watered in reaction. Josh had blindsided him, left him staggering and shattered deep inside. With one simple comment. He would give Hayden whatever he wanted physically? He’d be gentle and very eager?
Hayden shook his head, fighting intense arousal. “Don’t say that,” he whispered hoarsely, staring across the bar. He just couldn’t meet Josh’s gaze, not after he’d given such a vulnerable—and damn it—genuine-seeming pledge. “Josh, don’t even say shit like that or make crazy promises you won’t keep.”He swung his gaze back forcefully, staring the other Alpha down. “Just don’t.”
“Hayden, please…try and keep an open mind.”
“I’m fucking wide open, man.”
Josh gave him a grudging smile. “So I can see.” Then, Josh grew even bolder, and, reaching for the hand Hayden held gripped around the beer bottle, slowly stroked Hayden’s knuckles and then his wrist. “Hay, come on, give me a decent shot here.”
“You don’t want me. Not really,” Hayden said.
“You’re making blind guesses,” Josh said, still stroking Hayden’s hand. “While I’m making promises I intend to keep.”
Hayden couldn’t help reacting; his eyes slid shut and he drank in all that Joshua’s touch did to him, how it brought something long-dead roaring back to life. Or at least it nearly did, if only Hayden would’ve surrendered to the emotions. Instead, a rush of frustrated fury burst loose inside his Alpha core.
Where the hell did Josh get off trying to be, what? Tender, for God’s sake? Hayden jerked his hand out of Josh’s reach, lowering his head and growling slightly in threat.
Josh stared down at his own still-extended hand and repeated his earlier words. “Hayden,” he whispered again. “Please just…”
“Please, what, Alpha?” he rumbled in reply, rising up out of his seat slightly. “Please mate with you so you can make Daddy a happy man? Don’t worry, I know he’s got your back against the wall on this one. Or at least that’s what I heard.”
Josh just stared down at his hands in silence, and then began fiddling with his badge, his brows knit together in heavy concentration. When at last he did speak, he seemed to be choosing his words with extreme care. “There are things you need to know,” he said at last, “but I’m not going to blurt them out all at once. This deal with us, Hayden, it needs time. I’m ready, way more than ready…but you need time. So does our relationship.”
Hayden jerked back against the wooden booth seat. “What are you talking about? I don’t get your whole tone here, none of what’s going on. We shared one kiss on that night a long time ago. One quick tussle in the fucking moonlight hardly makes us mating material. One stupid kiss, that’s all it ever was, dude.”
Josh’s cheeks grew flushed. “Well, I’ve never forgotten it.”
Hayden waved him off, growing louder. “Oh, which part would that be, Peterson? The part where we kissed? Or what came after? When we got drunk and I killed a man out on the highway. Or maybe you remember testifying about how drunk I was—which, by the way, I don’t recall since I had the blackout to end all blackouts. Remember that, you motherfucker?”
Josh wouldn’t respond, but his eyes filled with stark, obvious pain.
“No?” Hayden reached across the table to shove Josh in the chest. “No? Well I’ll tell you exactly what I recall. I wasn’t the one driving your truck, and I’m pretty fucking sure that once you wrecked the damned thing, you moved my unconscious body into your seat. You let me take the rap for manslaughter, asshole. You.” Hayden waited for a response, but the cop just returned his gaze with cool, stoic calm. “You know, Peterson,” he said with a dark laugh, “if that’s not betrayal, then I don’t know what the hell is.”
A long silence spun between them, until even Hayden started to feel uncomfortable, wondering exactly how long Joshua could leave him hanging in the wind on this one. Fine, he’d go whatever distance the other Alpha tried to dictate.
Hayden started looking to flag their server down again, having drained his two latest bottles of beer, when Josh finally cleared his throat. “Hayden, I’m not bullshitting you. All I ask is that you give me time and listen.”
“To what, man? The details of how you set me up years ago?”
Joshua scrubbed a hand over his face. “I never set you up. Trust me,” he said wearily. “There’s just more to all of this than you realize right now. Things I’m working on, a whole lot I want to tell you, but the time has to be right.”
Hayden shook his head. No matter how much he would’ve once welcomed mating with the handsome, guarded wolf across from him, it was impossible now.
“I’m sorry, Joshua, but this plan was fucked from the get go and I can’t be part of it,” Hayden said. “You should be relieved. You can keep bedding the women, or whatever it is you like to do on your own time, and I’ll stay a lone wolf. But this thing with us? It won’t work.”
He started sliding out of the booth, but Josh grabbed hold of his arm and held on like a manacle. “It was more than a kiss, Hayden. You don’t know everything,” he said in a forceful, quiet voice. “You have no idea, but it was far more than a kiss we shared, much more than…”
Joshua stopped talking, his words trailing off, fading to nothing. Hayden watched the man’s Adam’s apple move up and down, captivated by the motion as he waited for him to say more, but no further sound escaped Josh’s throat.
More than a kiss? Not possible. Hayden had memorized every detail of the event, the way Josh’s tongue felt as it caressed his lips, how strongly their chests had pressed together, the two of them lying in the snow beneath the pregnant moon. Josh had awakened a new hunger inside Hayden’s body as his calloused hands cupped Hayden’s jaw, drawing their lips together. Then Josh deepened their shocking and unexpected kiss, truly plumbing the depths of Hayden’s mouth as if it were the most impo
rtant exploration of his life.
With every flick of their tongues, Hayden’s desire had spiraled to a crazy height, and for the first time—it had been a miraculous gift—he’d scented arousal radiating off of Joshua. Josh wanted him; Josh was turned on by their single, innocent kiss.
But it hadn’t been innocent at all, not once it started. It unlocked an avalanche of cravings and need, and soon there were dozens of erotic aromas wafting between them. Hayden even caught a shocking whiff of Josh’s own mating scent as the kiss grew deeper, and they rolled together in the cold snow. Their bodies, so close together, burned with supernatural, lusting heat.
Yeah, Joshua was right—it had been more than just a kiss. More like an explosion, a fireworks showcase, a binding of hearts. Way, way more than a kiss, he would have to agree.
He was going to admit as much, confess to what had awakened inside of him, but when he looked up into Josh’s face, he was stunned by what he glimpsed. Those eyes—those gorgeous, magnetic, luminous eyes—were shining with raw emotion.
Hayden had cried after that night, more times than he could count, his heart breaking bit by shattered bit as the full scope of Josh’s betrayal had finally become clear in his mind and in the evidence from the car accident. But he never thought to see those same emotions reflected in the other wolf’s eyes as he did right now.
A woodsy, tantalizing aroma struck Hayden just then, causing his skin to prickle. He sniffed the air for a moment, unwilling to believe his senses, but then he was sure—Joshua Petersen was emitting the highest possible mating scent. Right here in the bar, surrounded by humans, the guy was radiating the unmistakable marking scent of a werewolf.
Hayden whipped his head around, surveying the rest of the bar to see who had Josh’s lust cranked up so high. Surely there was a busty, hard-ridden blonde in here somewhere. Or some auburn-haired biker chick, the sort of woman Josh usually took home after a night in the bar.
Josh’s husky, coarse voice answered his unspoken question, electrifying Hayden even more. “It’s not some woman,” he said plainly. “It’s you, Hayden. Ever since then, it’s only ever been you.”
Slowly, Hayden swiveled back to face the man who’d once been everything his heart longed for—everything his body had desired. He shook his head in disbelief. “That…that can’t be true.”
Josh rubbed a weary hand across his face, and for the first time Hayden realized how exhausted he seemed. “Why not?” he asked in a heavy voice. “Why would you assume I’m lying? Use your senses. You know what you’re picking up. You’re getting far more from me than just arousal, aren’t you?”
Hayden shook his head, feeling suddenly angry. Josh had always done this, made him feel confined, unable to breathe.
But Josh wasn’t done with him yet. “I’ll tell you what you scent off me, Alpha,” he said in a rough, sexy voice. “You smell my desire. Waves upon waves of it. But you know what’s even stronger inside me now? Do you, Hayden?” Josh’s eyes lit up, alive with rich amber fire, as if he were being stoked from inside his soul.
When Hayden refused to answer, Josh forged ahead, his voice becoming stronger and more confident. “It’s the one you’d most want to deny, but I bet you’ve caught it…my mating scent. Thick, heavy and full of musk, my aroma’s working to entice you. To bring you to me—”
“Never.” Hayden snarled at the other Alpha. “You’ll never have me heeling to you.”
Somehow, Josh remained undaunted, leaning across the table, his eyes bright and alert. “My scent is meant to draw you to my side, wolf to wolf, Alpha to Alpha—and this, for one purpose only.” Josh’s voice became a rugged growl, his chest rising in short pants. “So that we can join our bodies, coupling together like our ancestors have from the ancient times. Creating that mystical bond that only mates share. That’s what you smell coming off me. And it’s the very thing I intend to share with you. That the elders request our bonding only makes this meeting easier. More convenient. But I know what I plan to show you, and exactly what I intend to have. You, Hayden. I’m going to claim you.”
With that bold announcement, Josh leaned back in the booth, folding both arms over his chest. And then he gave Hayden his familiar smirk, the cocky one that indicated how sure he was that somehow—someway—Hayden would always belong to him.
All of it unraveled Hayden’s cold resolve. He couldn’t seem to help himself; he sat up straight in the booth, lifted his nose into the air, and dragged a deep inhalation of the other wolf’s aromas into his body.
“My God, Josh,” he murmured in amazement. “God, your mating scent, it’s gorgeous. It smells…beautiful.”
Josh’s smile spread, even reached into his eyes. “It’s you doing it. You bringing that out of me. You always awakened me, I just didn’t understand what you made me feel.” He laughed, flushing slightly. “I’m sorry I was clueless for such a long time.”
Hayden settled into the booth, narrowing his eyes. “You never knew what to do with me,” he said in disbelief. “You laughed about how much I wanted you.”
“No.” Josh shook his head firmly, straightening his police uniform with a self-conscious gesture. “No, that was never it. It was just…your reaction to me was so intense, so forceful, even when you didn’t mean it to be.” Josh started smiling again. “You’re an Alpha, Hayden, in every way. And when I got around you, I was always…a little shy.” He shrugged. “A lot shy, actually. I just wasn’t sure how to respond. Not until that night.”
Hayden had spent five years telling himself Josh never wanted him, that their kiss had been a drunken fluke. That when they’d become giddy toward the night’s end, they had shifted to human form and, feeling overheated from the miles of exertion, fallen into the snow together. They’d still had the beer in their system, were high off their time as wolves, and somehow—even though Josh wasn’t gay—he’d cooperated with the kiss Hayden had planted on his lips.
Yet even now, sitting with Josh—feeling his storming desire, hearing his sandpaper voice again—all the lies Hayden had told himself during the time he’d been in prison, all of them seemed to be falling to pieces. No, he couldn’t let that happen. Josh had never come to him, not once during those two harrowing years of his imprisonment. Hayden gave his head a clearing shake, determined to cling to his longstanding beliefs about their past together.
“I’m sorry, Joshua, but all of this sounds nice in theory.” He released a cynical laugh. “And, yeah, you’re juicing up some pretty strong hormones over there, buddy. Not sure how you’re doing it, but maybe you’re playing tapes of your last one-night stand in your head. No matter what, I’m sorry, I know you’re not telling me the truth about what you felt.”
“What I still feel,” Josh corrected, intense gaze unwavering.
Hayden tossed his hands up in exasperation. “Fine, what you feel—felt—whatever. The point is, I don’t believe a word you just said.”
Josh’s dark eyebrows drew together, and the expression gave him a stern, forbidding look. If Hayden were anything other than Alpha himself, he might have begun backing out the bar’s front door. Instead, he waited. Quite patiently, in fact.
Josh spoke in a rumbling vibration. “How can you be sure of what I feel? What gives you the right to say whether I want you or not? Can’t you see in my eyes what you’ve been to me ever since that night?”
“None of that matters. Because I know the truth here, and for whatever reason, you’re playing me.”
“You tell me what makes you so sure.” Josh formed a fist with his right hand, lowering it on the table. The whole booth shook with the quaking force that held Josh in its grip, but Hayden wasn’t going to surrender or back down.
“Because if you’d felt anything close to what I did for you,” Hayden said, never wavering his gaze. “Anything even approximating what I did…you never would have been able to stay away from me after that kiss.”
With that, Hayden slid out of the booth, planted at least sixty bucks on the table between the
m and said, “Keep the change.”
He wondered how far he’d get into the parking lot before Josh trailed after him, insisting on carting him home before he actually did kill someone while drunk behind the wheel. He didn’t give his nemesis more than thirty seconds.
Chapter Four
Five years earlier, December 29th
They’d been running together for hours, and even Hayden had to admit he was almost out of steam. Joshua had worked at the airport all day long, so surely he must be about to collapse. They came to a standstill on the rock where Hayden had first seen him three years earlier, and stood side-by-side, tails wagging out their mutual pleasure. For once, Hayden didn’t care if Josh was more than a friend or not. The deep, peaceful sense filling his soul was enough. Might even be enough to make him happy from then on.
With a light howl of satisfaction, he lifted his voice toward the moon, singing out his contentment. Josh immediately joined in, his own song a haunting, shockingly mournful one. Then the other wolf nuzzled him affectionately, and for the most infinitesimal moment, Hayden swore he sensed a mating surge ripple between the two of them. Not a physical desire, but a deep knitting between their souls. The impression passed, however, as they continued to lift their voices higher and higher as the clouds parted, revealing the full radiant moon like a prize.
It seemed as if those blissful moments would never end, until with a leap and a giddy yelp, Josh led the way toward his truck, pausing at the low point of the valley. With a keen glance of his rare and gorgeous eyes, Josh seemed to ask him for something—or command him—Hayden didn’t actually care. He got the wolf’s drift; almost. Almost simultaneously they transformed into their human selves again, and then stood naked and panting in the thick wintry snow.
“Dive in,” Josh told him with a nod. “It will cool you down. Then we can move up the embankment and my truck’s right there.”
