by L. P. Maxa
She walked over to me, took a big sip and then a deep cleansing breath. “See what you did?”
I held my hands up in surrender. “Hey, I thought your anger ended in the car.” I slipped my hands around her waist and nuzzled her neck. “Come on, Kitten. I need a little lovin’ before I go make the money that’ll keep you in pregnancy couture.” She snorted against my shoulder, but I could feel her smile. She finally relented and put her arms around me, holding me tight. Just like that, our first fight was over. And I suddenly wanted to cancel the show and go back to our room and find out what make-up sex with Lexi would be like.
There was a knock on the door. “It’s go time, guys.” We had a rule: if it was time to go on, they told us through the door. We didn’t like strangers invading our space before a show.
I pulled away from Lexi’s body and held her face in my hands. “Be nice, Kitten. Please, for me.”
She nodded. “I promise. Go rock their world.” She gestured in the direction of the stage.
“You’re coming with me. I hated not seeing you during our last show. No more backstage for you.” I took her hand and grabbed Dagger’s headphone case as I headed towards the door. Dagger didn’t even require a leash anymore. He knew the drill. I placed the headphones on his head and gave him the leave-it command. I grabbed Lexi, kissing her deeply one more time. I stepped out on stage, and just like always, the crowd went fucking wild.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Lexi
The show was spectacular, per usual. The only downside was the fact that Lacey Tyler was standing next to me. She kept looking over at me every few seconds. I knew she had something to say, but I kept ignoring her. Everyone kept instructing me to be nice, and just like earlier, if I was to be nice I couldn’t talk.
She kneeled down and pet Dagger. “He’s a beautiful dog, Lex. How long have you had him?”
I rolled my eyes. Trying to get in my good graces by complimenting my badass dog? Lame. “About two years.”
“He’s so good, so behaved.”
I did chuckle at that. “His good behavior is a new development. He was a destructive mess before he met the band. Sometimes I wonder if he knows that they are mess enough for all of us, and leaves the job to them.”
Lacey stood and shrugged. “Maybe he just grew up and realized the error of his ways.”
“Look, if you think—”
She held up her hand and shook her head. “Please Lex, just hear me out.” I took a deep breath, but remained quiet. “I know you don’t like me, and I get it. When I think of the way I treated Luke, it makes me sick. But I can’t say this enough, I am here to make amends. I wanted to apologize to Luke, that’s all. I mean come on, Lex, we were so young. You can’t tell me that there isn’t anything you regret, anything you would change if given the chance.”
I cocked my head to the side, studying her. Her words rang true. We’d all done stupid shit that could just be chalked up to immaturity. Maybe Dash was right. Maybe I should just trust Luke’s judgment. He wasn’t the same kid he used to be either. “Fine. We can call a truce. But I swear to everything holy, if you hurt him in any way…I’ll end you.”
Lacey smiled like the cat that ate the canary. “Fair enough.” This girl couldn’t be truthful to save her pathetic little life.
Dash looked over at me and winked. I swooned (yet again). I’d never get enough of him doing that in front of a sold-out crowd. People out there were chanting his name, singing along to his songs. And he was thinking about me.
“So, you and Dash?”
“Me and Dash.” I tried to control my smile, but my face won.
“I’m not trying to pry, but none of you guys are very subtle with the jokes and innuendos. Are you pregnant?”
I shifted on my feet, not sure how to answer her. “Nope.” Telling that lie hurt, in a very odd way. I felt like I was betraying my kid, or my heart. But I’d be damned if I let Lacey alert the press to this…situation.
“Oh, well, it just seemed like—“
“Yeah, the guys have weird sense of humor. It’s just a running joke.” I bit my lip to keep from smiling. Up until this exact moment, I wasn’t sure if I should let myself be excited about the idea of having a baby. But now I knew, my initial reaction when asked was joy. And the fact that I couldn’t share my joy was making me hate her even more.
Jacks’s voice came over the sound system, my eyes flew to the stage. He rarely if ever talked during the shows. “So I know Dash has been going on and on about his girlfriend this past week. We all know he’s smitten.” Jacks looked over at me and chuckled, “He’s a smitten kitten.” Dash threw his head back and laughed at Jacks’s use of my nickname. “But I have a new love too.” The crowd started cheering. He used his hands to quiet them back down. “Well, actually I think Smith and I are kind of sharing our new crush.” The crowd went wild again as Jacks winked. “Wanna meet ’em?”
I shook my head as I leaned down and put on Dagger’s leash. Jacks jogged over to the side of the stage and I handed him the leash. “You are a nut.”
He laughed. “I know. But I love this guy. He’s part of the band. He needs to be introduced to our world.”
I watched as Jacks led Dags out on to the stage. Smith came over and gave him a good scratch behind the ears. The crowd and the lights didn’t seem to bother Dagger in the least. He sat there between Jacks and Smith and soaked up the attention.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Dash
Lexi and I were lying in bed, as naked as the day we were born. I was trailing my fingers lightly over her flat stomach. “I wonder what’s going on in there?”
Lex threaded her fingers through my hair, pulling slightly. “You guys are going to have to be more careful about the knocked up jokes. Lacey asked me if I was pregnant.”
I looked up at her, eyes wide. “Well since she was still standing at the end of the show, I take it you two made up?”
She laughed, “Made up? No, sir. More like called a temporary truce. She assured me that she came to apologize to Luke and catch up. Now that’s done and over and I can go back to hating her.”
I resumed my stomach drawings. I didn’t want to burst Lexi’s bubble, but I was almost positive that Lacy hadn’t left after the show. Luke rarely hooked up with groupies; it just wasn’t his thing. But a hot ex-girlfriend? He’d hit that all night. As long as he got her out of this hotel before we had to get on the bus in the morning, he’d be golden. Let Lexi catch him? The shit would hit the fan. “What did you tell Lacey? When she asked about our maybe baby?”
“I told her that y’all just had a weird sense of humor. I don’t trust her. I couldn’t tell her I might be pregnant.”
“If someone you loved or trusted asked you, what would you say?” I knew what I’d say. I knew how I felt at this point. But sometimes Lex was hard to read.
She put her hand on top of mine on her stomach. “I’d tell them the truth, that I’m actually pretty excited.”
I could hear the smile in her voice. I moved back up the bed before pulling her body against mine. Our talk last night in the bathtub…that moment had changed my life forever. I couldn’t help my smile any more than she could help hers, “I am too, Kitten.” I rolled her body on top of mine. She knew exactly what I wanted. She lowered her body onto my cock, always ready for me, taking me inside of her as far I could go. She threw her head back and let out a little moan. I closed my eyes and ran my hands along her thighs. Lexi began to ride me at a sinfully slow pace. Everything about sex with her was decadent, too good to be true. The closer she got to an orgasm the harder and faster her movements became. I sat up, wrapping my hands around her shoulders as leverage to pull her down onto me deeper. “Baby, you feel so fucking good.” I let my hand come between us and trail up her body. I placed my hand at the base of her throat, angling her body away from mine just enough to give her what she needed. “Come for me, Lexi.” And she did.
***
The next morning after taking
a shower together, where we got very dirty before we got clean, we headed down stairs. The bus was all packed, loaded, and ready to go.
Lexi went to climb up the steps but stopped short. “Are you freaking kidding me?!”
I followed her gaze. We all watched as Lacey kissed Luke and then got into a cab. I mumbled, “Dammit Luke.” He almost got away with it and the rest of us almost got away without having to hear Lexi scream at him for the rest of the day. “Lex, you can’t cause a scene in the parking lot, just get on the bus. Please.” By the grace of God she did what I asked.
Jacks headed straight for the bathroom, no doubt locking himself in with his PS3 until the storm blew over. Smart bastard.
Smith got down on his knees at Lexi’s feet. “Please Mommy, don’t yell at Uncle Luke.” He stood. “It’s bad for my sobriety.”
She popped him on the back of the head and then headed down the hall to our room. She came out carrying Dagger’s noise-canceling headphones. I chuckled as I watched her put them on Smith. I sat down on the couch, arms crossed, waiting for her to explode.
The instant Luke stepped on the bus, Lexi let him have it. “Please tell me you did not do something as asinine as bang Lacey?! You are better than that!”
Luke rolled his eyes. “What? You can sleep with Dash. Smith and Jacks can screw their way across the United States? But I can’t hook up with an ex-girlfriend? Why do I have to sleep alone every fucking night?”
“You don’t have to sleep alone. You just can’t sleep with her! Lacey?! Lacey?! She’s a whore, Luke!”
“So is he!” Luke pointed at me.
I raised my hands. “Hey! Not cool man.” I was a reformed whore. But they both just kept screaming at each other like I hadn’t even said anything.
Lexi put her hands on her hips. “It’s not the same thing, Luke, and you damn well know it. Dash has been nothing but amazing to me. Lacey has lied to you, mind fucked you, and cheated on you.”
“Oh so you don’t want me, so no one can have me? That’s pretty fucked up, Lex.”
Lexi gave Luke a glare that could wither a plant. “What in the hell are you even talking about?! You’re my family, Luke. I love you like a brother. Lacey?! She sure as hell doesn’t give a shit out you!”
“She was a kid, Lex! So was I, and so were you. We’re all different people now. We grew up.”
“Yeah, we grew up. We let go of the destructive people in our lives!”
Luke ran his fingers through his hair. “Look, I’m not saying she’s going to become a fixture around here, but we’re friends. I know you’re only trying to protect me—” He collapsed on the couch and pulled Lexi onto his lap.
“Uh, I’m not really okay with my girlfriend sitting on your lap, dude.” They both ignored me again. It was like I wasn’t even in the damn room.
“—and when I give you and Dash a hard time, it’s just because I’m trying to protect you. It has been me and you taking care of each other for so long, I don’t think we even know any other way.”
Lexi sighed. “You’re right. Ever since that night, ever since that tour, we’ve been constantly trying to save each other. But we aren’t kids anymore. We aren’t making the same mistakes we used to.” She leaned her head on his shoulder. “I’ll try and keep my mouth shut about your whores.”
Luke nodded solemnly. “And I’ll try and keep my mouth shut about yours.”
I raised my hand. “If I could interject y’all’s little therapy session here…none of this is because you’re secretly in love with my girlfriend, right?”
Luke rolled his eyes and rested his forehead against Lexi’s. “I love her. But I’m not in love with her.” His words were exactly what I wanted to hear, but his tone was all wrong. He sounded sad and lost.
I stood up. “Okay, that’s enough. Lexi get off of Luke’s lap before I punch him. Luke, stop calling me a whore. I resent it. I accept it, but I resent it.” I walked over to the bathroom and pounded on the door. “Jacky Boy you can come out now. They’re done screaming.” I went and sat down on the couch and pulled Lexi against my side wrapping my arms all the way around her.
Luke laughed, “Jealous much?”
I held up my finger and thumb. “I’m this close Luke, this close. You call me a whore and paw all over my girlfriend?”
Jacks came in and took his usual spot on the floor next to Dagger. “I think group therapy would be very beneficial for all of us.”
Chapter Twenty-Four
Dash
The next two weeks flew by. We played show after show, and Lexi was side stage for every one of them. I loved looking over and seeing her watch me perform. I loved making little jokes to the crowd about how happy I was with my girl. I swear, I was falling for her more and more each day. At night I would lay my hand on her stomach and silently pray that our baby was growing in there. I knew it was crazy to want a baby with someone I’d just met. But Lexi owned my heart and she was going to be an amazing mother. She was so good at taking care of all of us. She made the bus feel like home somehow.
Things between Lexi and Luke were good. He had stayed true to his word and stopped giving her such a hard time about being with me. And Lex had kept her mouth shut when she saw one of Luke’s ex’s from high school sneak out of the bus early one morning. Well, she mostly kept it shut. When we stopped for groceries that day she bought Luke some new sheets and told him to burn his old ones. Plus we hadn’t seen Lacey again. Luke hadn’t even mentioned her name.
Smith was doing really well too. He had picked his groupie habit back up, but thankfully, none of his other vices. We had settled into a routine. After shows Lex and I would head back to the bus to shower and get ready for bed. Either Smith or Jacks would come to our room to get Dagger and take him for a walk before letting him climb into their bunk. They alternated nights. But neither one of them stayed out as late as they used to.
The reporters were getting worse; we had to hire more security. It was like the calmer and more settled we had become, the more eager they were to catch us doing something stupid. We were writing again, all of us together. Jacks would get out his guitar and come up with new riffs; then Smith would join. It was usually Luke and I coming up with lyrics. Lexi would lay her head on my lap and listen to us until she fell asleep. She had started napping over the last week or so. I decided to take that as a good sign. We all watched her every move, silently weighing if it could be pregnancy related or not. It wasn’t just me who was excited about the possibility of a baby. All the guys were counting down the days until we’d know for sure.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Lexi
Tonight was the night. I was officially two days late. Dash and I decided that I would wait to take the test until after their show was over. All the guys were so excited. It was so damn sweet. I had agreed I’d take it as soon as we got back to the dressing room that way everyone could be there for the results. The only reason I had said yes was because I was 99% sure it was going to be positive. My boobs hurt so bad I wanted to cry every time I took off my bra. My stomach was hard as a rock, and the smell of Dagger’s food made me want to puke. I heard Dash talking over the sound system. “So you all know I have this girl…” The crowd cheered. They loved hearing little snippets about Dash’s personal life. He rarely ever did any interviews, none of the guys did. “She’s the best thing that has ever happened to me.” He played the first few chords of an old Van Morrison song, “These Are the Days,” before he started singing he looked over at me. “I love you, Lexi.” My eyes filled with tears as I mouthed, “I love you too.” He was the best thing that had ever happened to me too. Everything about Dash, about this life I was leading, was unexpected. Unexpected but so damn perfect. The crowd of hardcore rockers sang along to the slow sweet love song.
The show ended a couple of songs later and the guys all ran off the stage. Dash picked me up and buried his face in my neck. “I love you so fucking much, Lex.”
I smiled, “I love you too.” He sat me down. �
��That was wooing at its finest.”
He laughed, “I aim to please.” He took my hand and all but dragged me back to the dressing room. All the guys filed in after us and they shut and locked the door. Smith went over to his guitar case were we had hidden the pregnancy test and tossed it to me.
I went into the bathroom and shut the door. I read the instructions and then took the test. I balanced it on the counter while I washed my hands. It took no time at all for two pink lines to appear. For the second time that night my eyes filled with tears. I looked at myself in the mirror, taking some deep breaths. I was going to be a mom. I was having a baby. Holy balls. I closed my eyes, placed my hand on my stomach and smiled. I knew the guys were probably going crazy out there, but I wanted to savor this one small moment in time when it was just me and our baby.
I opened the door, test in hand. “We’re going to have a baby.” I loved seeing the smiles on their faces. And I was almost positive they all got a little teary eyed too.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Dash
None of the guys had felt like going out tonight. Everyone was excited about the baby. And I guess they didn’t feel like groupies and whiskey were the way to celebrate. Instead we were piled in the living area watching McClintock! It was Luke’s turn to pick the movie. But he and I both knew this was one of Lexi’s favorites. I wanted nothing more than to take Lexi to bed and make love to her until the sun came up. But it seemed like all the guys were feeling extra love towards her tonight so I begrudgingly agreed to the group slumber party. At least until everyone fell asleep. Luke and I sat on opposite ends of the couch with Lexi stretched out between us. She was mostly sitting in my lap—I couldn’t seem to get close enough to her lately—but her feet were resting on Luke’s legs. Since he had started being more supportive of our relationship, it had become easier for me to see their closeness. Don’t get me wrong—I still hated it when he kissed her forehead or walked with his arm around her—but seeing her feet resting in his hands no longer made me want to hit him. Well, not hit him hard enough to hurt him.
