***
Chad will be here any minute to go to class, and I’m pacing my room, nervously awaiting his arrival. I didn’t get the best night’s sleep. I still can’t get what happened between us yesterday out of my head, and I don’t know if I want to.
There’s a knock at the door. Chad’s been letting himself in for over three weeks, and now he knocks? I knew this would make things weird between us. When I open the door, I’m surprised to see Lynch, not Chad.
“Congratulations, Allira,” she says, handing me a letter.
As I open the piece of paper and begin to read, my heart sinks to my stomach. I’ve been recommended to sit my field exam.
I should be excited, shouldn’t I? I’m one step closer to getting out of here. Then why am I feeling so terrified?
“How about you take the day off class today to prepare, and I’ll see you bright and early tomorrow for your test,” Lynch says. “You’re going to do great, I just know it,” she adds before walking back down the hall to the elevator.
Chad gets off the elevator as Lynch gets on. He holds up a similar letter in his hand as he walks towards me. I nod my head and show him mine. We’re both getting out of here, but neither of us looks excited.
“Are you okay?” I ask Chad as he comes into my apartment.
“It’s what we’ve been working towards, right?” Is he trying to convince me or himself?
“Then why do I feel so worried?”
“I’m glad I’m not the only one.”
“Do you find it weird that it has happened really fast? It seems fast.”
Chad doesn’t answer. Flopping backwards on my bed, I’m stunned and overwhelmed. Chad sits at the dining table, silent, which is weird for him.
“What do you think will be on the tests?” I ask. I hadn’t actually thought about it until now.
Chad thinks for a moment. “Probably a fitness test for sure, and I’m guessing multiple questions on what to do in certain circumstances, like what happens if you’re found out, how to tell what type of defect they have, things like that.”
“Do you think Jack will be there? How can I pass a fitness test without him?” I didn’t think about that when I was cheating during training. What am I going to do?
Chad looks puzzled. “Well, I’m sure you’re fitter than when you started, right? That has got to count for something.”
“I guess. I did actually do all of that running and weights, but is it enough to get through? I’m not so sure.”
“I’m sure you’ll be fine. Did you want to practice at all, maybe study for the test?”
“Not really, do you?” Please say no, I really don’t want to do anything, I beg in my head.
“Want to go see Tate?” he asks.
That sounds like a much better idea. “Now that I will do,” I say, getting up.
Tate already knows something’s up by the time we reach his cell.
“What happened?” he asks.
“We’re having our field tests in the morning,” Chad says with little emotion behind it, almost robotic.
“Oh.” Tate’s disappointed as well. With us in the field, we won’t be here to have our daily visits.
“But hey, we still have time, it’s not like we’ll be assigned tomorrow if we pass,” I say, rationalising. “And assignments don’t last forever. Drew’s been here for a while now on break. We’ll be back.”
Chad and Tate exchange a look I can’t decipher. When I try to hear what they’re thinking, I only get static … and humming. They’re both blocking me from their thoughts.
“That’s true,” Tate says, “but I just don’t know how you two are going to go without seeing me every day. Let’s face it, I am the light of both of your lives.”
“Well that is true,” Chad says sarcastically.
“Have you told Shilah yet?” Tate asks me.
“No. We were told not to bother with classes today, so I haven’t seen him.”
“I’ll look out for him while you’re gone,” Tate says.
“Are you forgetting you’re only allowed out of this box at meal times?” I appreciate him trying to make me feel better, though. “He’ll be okay,” I say, more to myself than Tate. If I do what they want, I’m sure he will be. He has to be.
The Institute Page 44
