Dixon is just another guy. I need to stop thinking about him...starting right now. Why won’t my mind drift off to Xander or Jax? Why him? Is it the hot and cold thing? Is it messing with my head making me want him only because he’s making me feel as if he could care less if he sees me or not?
We’ve already had sex—multiple times—and yet I find myself day dreaming about what it’d be like to be with him in this elevator, in my Jeep, in his truck, and upstairs in his suite right now.
Images of Dixon and other women flash behind my mind as I think about the possibility that he may be here right now but not alone.
The thought alone makes me want to vomit.
Maybe it’s good he’s keeping his distance because all I know is the feelings consuming me right now are fucked up and not right on about a gazillion levels. It’s scaring the ever living shit out of me.
As soon as I enter Kayden’s suite, I head straight for the wine fridge grabbing a bottle and a wine glass before padding my way through the marble flooring and into my bedroom. I kick my heels off by the door, relishing in the feeling of the soft plush carpeting under my feet and between my toes. Heels look amazing, but they do a number on your feet by the end of the night.
I plug my iPod into the radio dock by the large bathtub and crank up Jana Kramer. I’ve been digging her music since meeting Dixon. Especially the song Whiskey. I swear it was written for him. Stripping off my clothes, I start filling the tub, adding bubbles as it gets almost full and turn on the jets. Before climbing in, I pop open the wine and fill the glass to the brim. Forget drinking like a lady. I don’t think there’s enough alcohol on the planet that can help me stop thinking about Dixon Beaumont. But a girl can try.
My phone starts blasting S.E.X. by Nickelback alerting me that I have a text from Xander. He’s back on tour right now, and I’m really missing not having him here. He’s the perfect distraction and the one guy who can make me forget Dixon—even if it’s for only a few hours. They had a show tonight at a country fair somewhere in Oklahoma. The tour is going well from what he’s told me and what I’ve seen online. I’m excited for them. They are amazing and deserve this chance to prove themselves and hopefully get a record deal at the end of it.
Xander:
What’s my favorite groupie up to this evening?
He’s called me that ever since the night he played at Lance’s Honkey Tonk. It cracks me up every time. There are girls obsessed with him and his finely pierced dick, seeing that his Facebook is full of pics of him out with bandmates at parties and bars after their shows with a large group of smoking hot women all sporting t-shirts with Slither Tongue written on them with their band’s skull logo.
This is what drives me nuts. I like Xander. A lot. When I know he’s in town, I want to see him. However, our relationship is purely sex, and I’m okay with that. So the idea of him hooking up while on the road doesn’t bother me in the least. But the thought of Dixon out tonight possibly with another girl or a girl at his place right now makes me sick with jealousy. It’s freaking me out. At least I have Xander to distract me for now, so I don’t drive myself crazy wondering what Dixon’s doing...or who he may be doing.
Me:
Nothing much.
Taking a bubble bath & getting trashed on expensive wine.
I snap a selfie of myself covered in bubbles with only my neck and face visible. My hair is up in a messy bun now with loose strands damp from the water and clinging to my neck. We love sending selfies to one another.
Xander:
Fuck. Me. I am really wishing I was back in Houston right now rather than on a tour bus full of stinky ass men.
I dangle my glass between my index and middle finger and take a long pull from it, savoring the sweet taste of the wine and the light buzz as it makes my mind drift into a state of ease. Setting my glass back on the edge of the tub, I text back,
Me:
I wish u were 2. It has really sucked the last few days. It’s so lonely after I leave the hospital when visiting hrs end.
I can’t wait 4 them 2 finally send Savannah home.
I watch the little gray bubble indicating that Xander is texting back and get lost in thought as I continue to think about everything going on right now. I don’t realize I’m crying until I feel the hot tears running down my cool cheeks. I swipe them away as they fall blinking my eyes as I fight the never ending stream that wants to fall. It’s been such an overwhelming week. It’s as if I were drowning and only inches away from losing my life before being ripped from the rapid waters and revived. Now my body is in a state of shock as it tries to come to grips with what it’s been through. Almost losing my best friend this week, then living in the constant fear that the asshole is still out there, is almost too much to handle. My life right now revolves around being at the hospital and being here at the hotel. I’m going stir crazy but, at the same time, I’m afraid to go out because who knows if that crazy ass Zak will try to hurt me to get back at Savannah. He isn’t thinking rationally, so there’s no telling what he’s capable of doing.
Xander’s text coming through snaps me out of my thoughts. I wipe my tears away with the palm of my hand before grabbing my wine glass again and gulping down the entire glass.
Pull yourself together. Savannah needs her best friend. She needs you to be strong for her while she heals. You can’t be weak because when you’re weak you become vulnerable. The second that happens, all hell can break loose.
I feel better after I have my mental pep talk with myself. I read Xander’s text as I feel my heart rate slowing back down to a normal rate.
Xander:
Well, if I were there I’d find all kinds of ways to distract you…
God, now I’m getting all worked up. Dammit! I’m all over the damn place tonight.
Me:
You can distract me right now…
I feel my heart rate begin to increase again as I slide my hand under the water and rest my fingers over my clit that’s aching to be played with. Since there’s no one here willing to scratch that itch, I’m going to have to settle for virtual Xander and my hand. Within seconds, a picture comes through to me of Xander in his bunk with his dick standing at full attention outside the waistband of his basketball shorts. His piercing is sparkling in the small overhead light above him, and the head of his dick is a dark purple as he fists his shaft, causing the veins running down his length to pop out, looking as if they’ll bust through his skin. He’s so damn hard.
Xander:
Are you touching yourself? I want you to rub that sensitive little bud of yours for me, beautiful. Make yourself come for me…
Setting my phone so it's leaning against my empty wine glass, my phone begins ringing telling me Xander’s FaceTiming me. I click answer with the swipe of my thumb and smile at the screen as I’m welcomed with a close up of the Xander’s perfectly pierced dick before the camera turns to his face.
“Hey, beautiful. I want to make sure I’m not the only one gettin’ myself off right now. Plus I want to watch you come as I do.” I watch as he rolls a condom over his length and begins stroking it nice and slow at the same time I start rubbing my clit in a slow circular motion with my index and middle finger.
“I can’t believe we’re doing this…” I say as a slight moan escapes me. I’m getting so turned on watching him jerk off.
His tongue darts out as he wets his lips, making me crave his tongue between my thighs. “Grab your tits and tweak those nipples just like I would,” he demands. Doing as I’m told, I bring my hand to my breasts, taking turns teasing each one while increasing the speed as I play with my clit, grinding my mound against my fingers. I watch as his grip tightens around his length and begins stroking himself faster, letting out a deep growl.
“That’s it...just like that. Fuck, Brooklyn I’m so hard right now. God, I wish I was there sucking on those perky tits and pounding my dick into your hot, tight cunt.” His voice is low and raspy as he speaks to me. My body tingles and warmth
washes over me and my nipples grow so hard they ache as I chase my orgasm.
Tipping my head back, I rest it against the tub and close my eyes as I slip my fingers inside of me and start grinding against my hand. As my orgasm hits me, it’s not Xander I am imagining fucking me in this bathtub. Instead, I’m staring into the crystal blue eyes of Dixon swimming in his pools of aqua as I scream out in ecstasy as my orgasm rocks me to my core.
My eyes pop open in shock as I float back to reality.
What the fuck was that?
Panicking, I turn to the phone where I see Xander knotting the condom he just jerked off into. “Now that was a sight to see. I love watching you come.”
I try to speak, but my throat suddenly feels parched and my stare desperately at my empty wine glass. I lean forward, grabbing the wine bottle beside it, and refill the glass while picking my phone back up.
I flash Xander a sexy little smirk before taking a large gulp. Finally finding my voice, I tell him, “Oh my God. I think I hear Rebecca coming in, and it sounds like she has company. I better go. I’ll text you tomorrow?” I say it more as a question rather than a statement.
“Service will be in and out tomorrow since we’re driving through the Goddamn boondocks, but I’ll text you back as soon your messages come through. Night, Brooklyn.”
“Night.” Is all I say before quickly ending the video call.
“Seriously! What the hell is happening to me?!” I shout out to no one before inhaling a deep breath and sink slowly into the water until I’m completely submerged underwater.
Popping back up, I run my hands over my face and wipe the water from my raccoon eyes. I retrieve a washcloth from the side of the tub and dip it into the water before scrubbing my eyes until they are red but clean. I stare at my reflection in the large mirror beside the tub, not recognizing the girl staring back at me. Dixon has altered something inside of me. I’m terrified that whatever it is he’s doing to me is only going to get worse before it gets better.
Chapter Five
Dixon
It’s been five days since I’ve talked to Brooklyn. Well, really four since it was already after midnight when we landed in Houston. I haven’t seen her since I slipped out of the hospital while she was still asleep. Even though I wanted to, I haven’t been back to the hospital since. It’s been a very long fucking four days. I have tried to avoid her at all costs, and it’s worked, for the most part. That is until tonight.
Kayden returned to Beaumont so I’ve been able to resume my daily routine of working on my construction site, which is where I’d much rather be. But today being Friday, I had to come into the office for a meeting with some investors for the wind energy project we’re working on. Kayden mentioned in passing that on Tuesday, if all goes well, Savannah will finally be discharged, and they’ll be heading to Sugar Land to stay at his ranch while she recuperates.
Which means Brooklyn will only be here for three more nights. It’s been hard, no pun intended, having her only a few feet away from me. So many times I stared at my phone and contemplated texting her asking if she wanted to come down to my suite for a quick fuck, but every time the thought popped into my head I quickly pushed it far into the back of my mind. With her, it can never be just a one-time hook-up. If I give in and sleep with her, I’ll only end up finding myself getting in deeper with her than I already am.
I was doing great with keeping myself distracted from all thoughts of Brooklyn until I walked into the hotel bar just now and spotted her here. Brooklyn and Rebecca are across the room at the bar sipping drinks and talking to some guys. It’s as if she can feel my eyes on her because, within seconds, she’s shifting on her seat and turning her head, locking her eyes with mine.
My heart is pounding in my chest as she flips her long wavy hair that’s falling around her face back over her shoulder and tucks it behind her ear. It’s as if just the sight of her has frozen time. My feet are firmly planted to the floor as I stand here gaping at her like a jealous boyfriend from across the room. The guy beside her keeps casually putting his hand over hers while talking. He takes no notice that all her attention is focused on me.
The sound of my name being yelled breaks me from the Brooklyn trance I was just lost in. I look around the room and spot one of the guys from the Beaumont offices. A lot of them hang out here after work to unwind after a stressful work week. I’m starving since I didn’t get a second to eat anything, so I decide to join a few of the guys when they asked me to stop in for some drinks. My original plan was to order room service then go out to Vertigo. But call me a glutton for punishment…I knew Brooklyn would be here. She’s been in here every night this week since Savannah woke up in the hospital.
Normally I sit on the other side of the room, trying my best to ignore the fact that she’s here, but of course Greg and Miles picked a booth close to the damn bar. I sneak a glance at Brooklyn one more time and catch her watching me. Her eyes are filled with a mixture of pain and hunger. Of course, the asshole in me can’t stop thinking about taking advantage of all of that emotion built up inside of her. Because the one thing that keeps me going back for more is the way she’s able to bring me to my fucking knees in the bedroom and make me not just enjoy fucking her, but make me starve to fuck her. I feel like an addict trying to stay clean when I’m around her.
She’s taunting me as she slowly runs her tongue over her full lips, all the while running her finger gingerly around the brim of her glass making my dick jump in my damn slacks. Everything in me is screaming to walk over there, yank her off the goddam stool, and drag her by her hair up to my penthouse. All the while banging on my chest like the fucking barbarian that she’s turned me into. The little voice in the back of my head is whispering to just take one hit off those 'kiss me' lips. Just one more time. Then we can be done for good. The last time we were together in L.A. I didn’t think it’d be the last time. I didn’t take full advantage of having her there willing to let me do to her sweet as sin body as I pleased.
I ignore the voice in my head though, much to my dick’s dismay, and make my way through the room, sliding into the booth beside Miles.
“Glad you showed up.” He says as he waves his hand in the air signaling for a waitress.
Reaching for the menu, I open it up, and look over the vast choices even though I already know what I’m going to order. I’m only trying to distract myself and make my eyes behave instead of wandering towards Brooklyn again.
I spend the next hour eating and drinking. I start out slow with a few beers, then after I cave and allow my eyes to travel back over to Brooklyn, I decide I need the hard stuff. Now I’m officially trashed, horny as shit and pissed the fuck off because 'Mr. Cheap Ass Suit' at the bar can’t keep his hands off Brooklyn. One minute he’s tucking her hair behind her ear and making her laugh, and the next he’s resting his hand on her thigh.
Miles and Greg are chatting it up about football, bitching and moaning because the Texans didn’t make it to the playoffs. I’m usually just as heated in playoff discussions, but right now I’m too busy trying to count to ten, repeatedly, so that I don’t go over there and knock that guy out, causing a scene in my cousin’s hotel. Normally, I couldn’t care less if the local press gets bored writing about their day to day shit and decides to talk about the wild Beaumont boys breaking hearts and noses all around Houston. But with everything going on with Kayden and Savannah, I’m doing my best to lay low and keep a low profile until things simmer down.
I know Knox is a loose cannon right now with the stress of that Zak guy still being out there. The last thing I want is to be on the receiving end of his fury. I know my cousin all too well. Like me, he’s a hothead who hits first and thinks later. If I piss him off, we’ll come to blows because Zak isn’t here for him to take his anger out on, so he’ll pour all of his anger into being pissed off at me for causing a scene and embarrassing Brooklyn.
“Dixon? Hey? Did you hear what I said?” Greg asks banging his hand off of the wooden table fo
rcing me to stop watching Brooklyn and bring my attention back to him.
I clear my throat and anxiously run my fingers through my hair as I blow out a slow breath between my lips. “Sorry. What?”
Shaking his head, he takes a long pull from his beer before answering me. “I asked you what you thought of the upcoming playoff games. Who’s your pick to advance? We’re looking to start a pool with the guys at work. I’m thinking we’ll have a pretty decent pot if we can get everyone in on it.”
Wanting to be done with this whole night I agree to join in, “Sure. Sounds good. I’m too drunk to do my picks and more than likely you douchebags would mix them up. I’ll let y’all know Monday mornin’.”
My eyes linger on Brooklyn once, and I feel my blood turning from a simmer to a rapid boil as things seem to be moving past just being friendly. Digging my phone out of my pocket, I say fuck it and pull up Brooklyn in my contacts. My brain and my dick are in a battle right now. Sadly, for my brain, my dick is winning.
Meet me at the elevators.
It’s not a question, and she knows it. She must sense that I’m not fucking around because I spot Brooklyn slipping off her barstool and make her way towards the exit. She’s lucky she picked the easy choice because I really didn’t want to have to cause a scene and drag her ass out like the thoughts I had earlier in the evening of what I was going to do to her.
I don’t know why I’m doing this, but I guess I’m pleading temporary insanity for what I’m about to do. Sliding out of the booth, I fish out my wallet and throw some bills down on the table for the waitress. “Well, fellas, I’m going to head upstairs. You can just tell the bar to bill my card for y’all’s drinks.”
Picking up another shot, Miles furrows his brows at me as he dangles his shot between his fingers. “You’re bailin’ on us already? Shit, it’s only quarter after nine.” He says with shock in his voice as he glances at his Rolex before tossing back his shot. Licking his lips, he slams the glass down on the table. “This is bullshit, man. I thought we would warm up here then move the party over to Vertigo.”
Heart of Dixon Page 4
