Jeepers Reapers: There Goes My Midlife Crisis

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Jeepers Reapers: There Goes My Midlife Crisis Page 17

by Marianne Morea


  Wringing his hands, he was so unsure. “What if I go through the audit only to end up with darkness anyway? If I take Morana’s offer, then it was my choice.”

  “Like enlisting in the Army before they can draft you? Come on, Alistair. You’re hedging your bets with a shark.” I got up from the chaise, and stretched. “You have tonight to think about it, but Angelica will need your answer by tomorrow before your audit begins.”

  “Where will it take me first?”

  I shrugged. “The book will tell us once you place your palm on the cover. We’ll do that before we leave for Brooklyn.” It was Cade’s suggestion, and I agreed. That way Alistair wouldn’t have time to brood.

  He glanced at the ghost box on the table. “What about tonight? Shouldn’t I get a last meal or one final fling before I face judgment?” He laughed, but I knew the humor was to hide his unease.

  “First off, ghosts don’t eat. Secondly, you’re not facing judgment. You’re facing yourself. Which, if you ask me, is the hardest of the two. Why else do you think it’s required of all souls?”

  “I don’t know, maybe as an everlasting fuck you to the masses?”

  “Alistair, don’t.” I twisted my hair into a knot at the base of my neck. “Are you asking about a last meal because you think your fate is already sealed?”

  He sat silent, and his shimmer faded.

  “You’ll get to your next wild ramble. The possibilities should excite you, if not pique your interest. I know I’m curious.”

  “Care to trade places?”

  The sigil on the ghost box winked again. “I’ve got a better idea. Why don’t you help me with Esther? I have to free her from her earthly anchor so she can start her journey as well. It’s not an easy task, but well worth it.”

  “Is she bound to you, too?”

  I shook my head. “She’s anchored to an atomizer.”

  His brows pulled to a point. “Why?”

  “That’s what I need to find out.” I watched interest pique on his face. “Will you help?”

  “I don’t know about helping, but I’ll come along for the ride.” He drifted up from the patio chair. “It’s not like I’ve got anywhere else to go.”

  “Good.”

  I turned the ghost box around on the small table to face me. Pressing my palm to the sigil on the lid, the box snicked open.

  Cade was there to help me with Harry, but tonight I flew solo. Was I apprehensive? Yes. Still, the worst that could happen was my unfettering techniques failed and had to wait for Cade to get back to finish the job.

  I drew the atomizer from the box and held it in my hand, concentrating on the beginning tingle as I did with Harry and the paper-knife.

  “Wow, what is that?” Alistair asked, looking at his palm.

  “It’s Esther’s anchor. I’m not sure how this will go considering we’re tethered, but my guess is you’ll see and feel everything I do. All I ask is that you stay quiet. I’ve only done this once before, but it was very intense.”

  I closed my eyes and shut everything else out. Me. The traffic in the street. Alistair watching. Everything.

  Taking in measured breaths, I gently squeezed the cloth-covered bulb, letting the scent of Shalimar set the tone before I summoned Esther.

  So far so good.

  The air around me changed in temperature and texture, and I opened my eyes. Esther stood on the grass, waiting with a smile.

  “Hey, doll,” she said. “Sorry I was so insistent. I had a taste of freedom the other night, and I didn’t want to wait any longer.”

  Alistair cleared his throat, smoothing his thinning hair. I wanted to roll my eyes, but didn’t. He didn’t have many friends when he was alive, and even less now that he was dead. The least I could do was make the introductions.

  “Esther, this is Alistair. Another of my charges. He’s set to start his journey tomorrow, same as you.”

  If he wasn’t already gray, I’d have said he paled, but the smile on his face was genuine. “I’m pleased to meet you.”

  “Likewise.” Esther’s answer was perfunctory, and she looked past Alistair to the house, craning her neck to see into the kitchen. “Where’s your hotsy totsy friend tonight?”

  Alistair’s nostrils flared. I didn’t blame him for feeling slighted, and I knew him well enough to guess he’d vanish in a huff if I didn’t do something.

  “Cade has other charges that need his attention tonight, but Alistair has graciously offered to step in and help. If anyone can empathize with your state, it’s him.”

  She actually looked at Alistair this time and it was as if something clicked, and her smile reflected an instant kinship. “Thank you…that’s so thoughtful.”

  Mollified or not, Alistair’s face lost that strained look. At least he was sticking around. “Okay, people. Fasten your seatbelts. It’s going to be a bumpy night.”

  Blocking everything out once more, I closed my eyes, and focused my attention on the feel of the atomizer in my hand, and the picture of Esther in my head.

  I heard the kitchen door open and close, and anticipation flared in my belly. I didn’t need to open my eyes to know it was Cade. His presence always felt like live current permanently skimming my skin.

  “Picture every detail, Lou. Down to the tiniest element.”

  A smirk cracked my lips, even as I cracked open one eye. “You’re killing my mojo again, dude.”

  “Sorry.”

  “Don’t be sorry, just be quiet.”

  He grinned, putting a finger to his lips. “Whatever you say, boss.”

  “I’m glad you finally see it that way.”

  I inhaled, recentering myself. Not an easy thing to do with Cade watching. I counted my breaths. Inhale. Exhale. Focus. Seconds passed and the world around me fell away same as it did the last time.

  The atomizer felt weighty in my hand, and it chilled to the point of pain. Energy crackled at the center of my palm, radiating upward. Like before, I gave the energy its head, and let it go where it needed.

  Muscles constricted in my chest and throat with the same suffocating sensation. I’d been here before, so I calmed my ramming heart, and the pressure against my ribs eased.

  The chill from the atomizer splintered outward through my veins, crystalizing like ice on a window pane. Crackling energy numbed every inch of me, and I lost my sense of hearing. I floated in nothingness, and knew the images would come.

  Shadows formed, coalescing into pictures. Angular and incomplete. I saw Esther. Beautiful, and full of life and laughter. She wore the same sheath dress she had in ghost form, only it was vibrant and full of color instead of iridescent gray.

  It was a party, and I caught the scent of ocean breeze mingled with that of cigarettes and alcohol. Music played, a tinny jazz type, and people danced with abandon. A real life Great Gatsby shindig.

  “Esther, no. It’s late, love.” He smiled at her, indulgent, as she tugged him toward the dance floor. “I have work in the morning.”

  “You’re always working,” she pouted.

  “Someone has to in order to keep you in all your frills and furbelows.”

  Esther grinned, coyly seductive. “Yes, but it’s worth every penny when those frills are down around my ankles when you get home.”

  Giggling at his embarrassment, she took his drink from his hand and downed it. “Gah, Fred! You’re such and old Mrs. Grundy!”

  “Essie, I’m tired. I want to go home.”

  “Just one more dance. I promise. Then we’ll go.”

  He exhaled, giving in. “You go. I’ll be here when you’re ready.”

  Laughing, she threw her arms around his neck. “You’re a good egg, Fred Meuser.”

  “A good egg, or a Mrs. Grundy?”

  “Both!” She laughed, tossing her purse on the small bar table. Blowing him a kiss, she twirled toward her friends on the dance floor, the scent of Shalimar in her wake.

  Images flooded too fast and too blurred to make sense. The puzzle finally stopp
ed, and I watched as Esther danced with another man by the pool.

  “I gotta go, Eddie. Fred’s waiting.”

  “Come on, Essie. You got me out here for a reason.” He slid his arm around her shoulder, but she ducked out from under his reach.

  “You’re a good dancer, Eddie. That’s all this was.”

  “And you’re a bearcat. You know you want more than just a twirl in the moonlight. Poor ol’ pushover Fred can’t even manage that.”

  He yanked her arm, pulling her against his chest. “You want me, Essie. I can smell it on you.”

  “Eddie, stop!”

  She struggled, breaking his hold enough to rake her nails down his face.

  “You bitch!” Letting go, his hand flew to his bleeding cheek.

  Esther turned to run, but caught her foot on the edge of a deck chair. With a scream, she fell into the pool, smacking her head on the concrete edge.

  Blood spread in a red cloud, but instead of calling for help, Eddie smoothed his jacket and walked back to the party…

  The vision dimmed, and my muscles relaxed. The chill receded as did the numbing sensation across my body, same as it did with Harry. I opened my eyes to find Esther sobbing in Alistair’s arms.

  “I should’ve left with Fred when he asked. Why did I have to be so selfish? So stupid?” She cried even harder, and Alistair stroked her translucent hair.

  Her sobs subsided, but she still clung to Alistair. “I never told Fred how much I loved him. I just wanted to have some fun. I knew Eddie was a ladies’ man, a real sheik, but I didn’t think…”

  “It’s not your fault, Esther.” I wished then I could hug her, and I was grateful Alistair was there to give her a little comfort. “No woman deserves to me manhandled against her will. No means no.”

  “I only wish Fred knew how I felt about him.” She looked at the atomizer still in my hand. “He gave me the Shalimar for our anniversary. He was so good to me. I never appreciated him when I had the chance. All the little things he did to show me he cared. And how did I repay him? I made a fool out of him at a party and then died before I could explain.”

  “Your death was an accident, Esther. A terrible, stupid accident, but it wasn’t your fault. Fred must’ve known you loved him, and maybe you’ll find your answers on your audit journey. This isn’t the end. This is just the beginning. Have faith.”

  Esther’s shimmer changed color and density just as Harry’s did, and the atomizer lost its chill in my hand.

  I put it on the table and looked at my tingling palm. The Keepers mark was more pronounced than ever.

  I looked at Cade and he nodded. “Almost a full mark, but enough for our kind to recognize.”

  “It’s still mirrored. Is that usual?”

  “I’ve never seen it, but nothing about your Keeper initiation is usual, so I wouldn’t worry. Angelica would let us know if something was wonky.” He pulled me in for a hug. “You did it, Lou. And without my help.”

  Esther was calmer, and she stayed tucked under Alistair’s arm. “Can I stay? Just for tonight?” she asked, hopeful.

  “That’s up to Cade.”

  I craned up to look at him and he nodded. “There’s a Keeper waiting for you at Memento Mori, but I think they can wait until the morning. You cannot leave the house or the grounds. If you do, you’re fate is in your own hands if you come across a reaper. They’ll give you no quarter, and darkness is all you’ll know.”

  Esther shivered, but Alistair tightened his grip on her shoulder. “She can stay with me in the guest room.” He looked at me. “If that’s okay with you.”

  “That’s fine with me, but I think that’s up to Esther.”

  She nodded, and the two vanished.

  Exhaustion nearly crippled me, and I sank onto the chaise. “God, what a day.”

  “I think you mean what a week,” Cade laughed, pushing my legs aside so he could squeeze in beside me.

  “Is it always like this? Death after death. Ghost after ghost?”

  He slid his arm around my shoulder and kissed the side of my head.. “Not always. We do get to fit in some fun from time to time.”

  “Like what?” I looked at him. “What do Keepers do for fun?”

  He cupped my cheek, running his thumb under my bottom lip. “I can’t speak for other Keepers, but this Keeper kind of likes what we’re doing right now.”

  “Hanging out in the moonlight?”

  Nodding, he leaned in and took my mouth. “That, and other things.”

  He kissed me but it wasn’t demanding. It was comfortable and calming, and just what I needed until my stomach growled loud enough to hear.

  “Yikes! Was that you?” Cade’s lips spread into a grin mid-kiss.

  My cheeks flushed, and I hid in the hollow between his neck and shoulder.

  “You forgot to eat, didn’t you?”

  “Angelica bought me coffee,” I mumbled into his shirt. “Does that count?”

  Cade got up from the chaise and then held his hand out for me. “Keepers need sustenance. If you’re going to flout the first rule I taught you about being a Keeper, then you’ll have to deal with the consequences.”

  “Consequences?”

  He nodded. “You have to eat whatever I make for you.”

  “Does it matter if I tell you I hate to cook?”

  He laughed. “It figures.”

  We walked side by side to the kitchen door, and Cade headed straight for the fridge.

  “Alistair seemed visibly changed by Esther’s unfettering,” I said, closing the back door. “Do you think it’ll make a difference?”

  “In his audit?

  “No, in whether or not he’ll help us with Operation Reap what you Sow.”

  Cade took out a carton of eggs and a package of sliced cheese. “Maybe. I can talk to Angelica. See if she can coincide his and Esther’s journeys.

  “Is that possible? What if their paths aren’t the same?”

  He closed the fridge. “Stranger things have happened, but the more pressing question is what kind of omelet do you want?”

  Chapter Twenty

  “JUST PUT THE FLAT of your palm on the book. Easy peasy lemon squeezy.” I gestured to the Messorem Malleo.

  “What if I don’t want to leave?” Alistair glanced at Esther engrossed in the television in the next room. “Maybe I could hang around a bit longer. Help her figure things out.”

  “Figure out what?” I followed his gaze. “I hate to break it to you, cupcake, but your ghost girlfriend was dead long before you were a twinkle in your parents’ eyes.” I pushed the book closer to his hand. “And speaking of your parents, we need to get a move on. Your funeral starts in a little over an hour, and I don’t want to be late.”

  “Are you sure Esther can’t come?”

  When did I become the parent of a pair of teenagers? “We told you. Esther needs to go to Memento Mori where she’ll be safe. Do you really think a cemetery is the safest place for an unclaimed spirit? “

  “But I claim her.”

  “Not the same thing and you know it. I meant without a Keeper, as in keep her safe. She’s not tethered to me, like you.”

  His eyes widened at that, but I shut him down. “Do not get any ideas. Besides, anchors are only formed in moments of emotional stress when a person dies. Like I said, Esther has been gone for a long time.”

  Cade walked into the kitchen, cellphone in hand. “Good news. Angelica said it’s possible.”

  “You’re kidding,” I replied, stirring cream into my coffee.

  “Nope, and I’m as surprised as you.”

  Alistair looked between us. “What are you two talking about?”

  “Well, that depends on you.”

  “Don’t play games.” Apprehension creased Alistair’s forehead. “Just spit it out.”

  “What if I told you I asked Angelica if you and Esther could do your journeys in tandem,” Cade posited. “That way you could finish your audits and possibly go on to the next wild ramble t
ogether.”

  “What’s the catch?”

  Cade poured himself a cup of coffee and then leaned on the kitchen sink. “Ah, well. There is that. You would have to agree to help us with our reaper problem.”

  “And yet Morana is supposed to be the wheeler dealer in all this.” Alistair glanced between me and Esther before looking at Cade, since he posed the question. “You said possibly. What if I want it to be definitely?”

  The croissants in the bakery box on the counter called my name, and I got up to butter one for myself and two for Cade. “No one can guarantee that, Alistair,” I answered instead. “It depends on the outcome of your audits. Esther may move on, and you don’t, or vice versa. Even if you both earn the privilege of moving on to the next wild ramble, her ramble might not be yours, and etcetera and so on.”

  “It’s a crap shoot,” Cade added, breaking a crusty edge from the end of his croissant. “But what’s the alternative? Haunting this house together forever?”

  The option was meant to sound ludicrous, but Alistair perked up. “That doesn’t sound so bad.”

  “For you,” I said. “You have your own personal Keeper tethered to your side. You can go wherever I go, but Esther would be stuck. It would be like sentencing her to an eternity under house arrest.”

  I watched his face soften as he watched her laugh at a commercial. He really liked her, and it seemed the feeling was reciprocated. Funny. He pursued in life but scored in death.

  “I still can’t believe she’s never watched television.” He moved to the den’s doorway between the kitchen, and she looked up with a welcoming smile.

  “We don’t have much time left for inner debate, so I suggest you get to it.”

  “I need to talk to Esther about this first.”

  “Then do it.” I tapped my wrist. “Tick tock.”

  “I STILL THINK THE BOOK GOT IT WRONG.” Alistair held his hand over the Messorem Malleo for a third time.

  “What’s wrong about killing two birds with one funeral? We were headed there anyway, and now we can get the audit ball rolling as well.”

  Cade poked his head in from getting Esther settled in the transport. “What’s he griping about now?”

  I put the book in my magic messenger bag, and buckled the strap. “He doesn’t believe the book picked a correct life event for us to start.”

 

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