by W. A. R.
The buildings were closer together then, Amber realized, with hardly any trees around. There was a traffic light to the right, and an abandoned church beside it. Weeds had pushed through the cracks in the road and the sidewalks; concrete and asphalt no longer able to keep Nature from taking back its glory. They were actually in town, no longer just on their way. She frowned then, realizing that she had missed the whole trip because she had been lost in her own thoughts.
“I feel it too.” Miles then told her, ignoring Rusty’s comment that they were going to be fine. Amber sighed and leaned back against the seat, closing her eyes easily as she inhaled. “Do you think we should turn back?” he asked and she could feel Rusty shift from beside her. Yes, she mentally stated, though the word never left her mouth.
“Absolutely not.” Rusty stated roughly then, intervening. “It would be a waste of precious fuel since we have already made it this far.”
“It’d be a waste of our precious lives if things don’t go how we want them to.” Miles countered then, his eyes heating just slightly. Amber opened her eyes and looked between the two men and as primal as it was, she sat there and wondered who would back down first, who the Alpha really was. Both men looked angry and the slightest bit concerned. She soon got her answer when Rusty shook his head and sighed, caving in.
“Look, we will run in, get what we need, and run right back out. We will be quick so we can get back.” He told them before looking at Amber pleadingly. “Deal?”
Amber glanced at Miles briefly, confirming that he was waiting on her response. She sighed then, deciding that it was the best thing to do. “Fine. But we are going to be fast about it.”
“No problem.” He stated before Miles turned left at a carelessly swinging traffic light. “Turn here. There’s a pawn shop that seems to be in pretty good shape.” Rusty stated quickly and Miles jerked the truck to the right, hitting the brakes slightly harder than usual to stop the momentum from the sudden turn.
He killed the ignition and Rusty clambered out of the passenger door, leaving it open for Amber to follow. She did so as Miles stepped out of the driver’s door. And then, all three doors closed, the trio took in the pawn shop and the Jenson’s Farm Supply store a few hundred yards behind it. They stared at the two stores, uncertain of which one to take on first. Amber was bombarded with memories, flashbacks of the Jenson’s Farm Supply in the other town, the town closer to their home…when Miles had first saved her life. It was the first blood that he had taken on her behalf and glancing at him then, she knew that he was thinking the same thing. And yet, he didn’t regret it…not one single bit, and she could tell from the slight smirk that was curling at one side of his mouth.
Rusty looked at the two of them and they returned his uncertain stare. “I’ll go check Jenson’s if you two want to take everything we find here. It’s locked from the outside so I’m sure it wasn’t hit. There will be more in there than at Jenson’s I assume.” He stated and Miles nodded, shifting on his feet just slightly, his guns moving with him. The silver of his daggers shone brightly against the sun as they rested against the outside of his thighs.
Miles nodded. “Yeah…Jenson’s Farm Supply is probably ransacked. Be careful. Meet back here in fifteen minutes?”
Amber sighed and stepped forward. “Sounds good to me.” She stated, her eyes on the bar covered door. She removed her knife from her hip as Rusty moved his gun from his back to his hold before him. He blew out a heavy breath and began jogging past the pawn shop and within seconds he disappeared from Amber’s vision.
Amber turned back to the door, waiting patiently for Miles to appear with the crowbar. She couldn’t stop the smile from coming to her face when he arrived, crowbar in both hands as he shoved it against the lock. They communicated without even speaking and that alone amazed her. The metal scraped as he forced it in, and he gripped it with both hands, lifting a brow at her.
“Ready?” he asked and she nodded silently in response.
He clenched his jaw and bent his knees, moving to pry open the lock. Once he applied pressure on the opposite end, the bar door clanged and swung open violently. Miles stood, lowering the crowbar to the ground before reaching for his daggers. He knew that a gunshot would draw the attention of many more Biters than the ones that they had seen. Looking around anxiously, she noted how the Biters were simply walking around aimlessly, as if Amber and Miles weren’t even there. She wanted to question it, and thought the sight so very unusual, but said nothing. Maybe they honestly didn’t know they were there. Miles looked at her and grinned before moving to enter the building first. Amber shook her head and followed him.
Once inside, she took in their surroundings and nostalgia hit her like a bullet. The barred door clanged loudly behind her and she flinched. There were guitars hanging up in the back where Miles stood, looking at them. Rows and shelves of electronics screamed at her, jewelry behind the counter, guns as well…ammo, even a few bows. This was once someone’s livelihood, once someone’s life. Every piece of this. She watched as Miles reached up and pulled a dark brown guitar from its hold. He looked at it fondly for a moment before setting it on the counter, and then his eyes found the jewelry. He contemplated for a moment before removing his hand from the guitar and turning to Amber, where she stood, unable to move. She couldn’t read what went on in his mind in that moment, or the moment before, but she was sure that she would learn soon enough.
“You alright?” he asked of her and slowly she nodded, forcing herself to move. She turned her gaze up shelves, examining rows of valuables as her boots scuffed along the floor.
“Yeah, I’m fine. Just…” he turned so that he was fully facing her. She stopped to reciprocate and found herself blushing at the intensity with which he looked at her. “…thinking.”
“I see.” He paused and looked at her. “I’m remembering a lot of things too.” He crossed his arms and turned one corner of his lips up. She knew what was coming. “Like, for example, that night at Jenson’s Farm Supply.”
Amber laughed a little then and began walking down one of the rows, her fingers trailing along the dusty shelves as she looked at the equipment. “You remember that night huh?” She lowered her voice and mumbled. “The night this whole forsaken mess began.”
“I remember a lot.” He told her then, watching as she moved. She glanced back over at him sadly before returning to the task at hand. She was postponing getting the ammo, she knew. She was living in nostalgia. A PlayStation: Kyle used to have one. Cassie used to own that DVD there, that CD here. Her father used to go fishing with a pole just like that one. It wasn’t unpleasant, however, these thoughts. They were welcome.
Amber looked at him, her eyes taking in all that he was. “‘You need to understand that some things will just need to be done, even though it feels wrong.’”
He nodded and looked away from her to the guitars. “That still holds true.”
She rounded the end of one aisle and began coming back up the next. “We’ve come a long way since then.” She commented, avoiding his darkened gaze. She knew that if she were to meet it that she would be frozen in place, unable to move. “A lot has changed.”
“Yes…it has.” He told her, his slow drawl hanging in the air. She stopped at the end of the shelf and turned to him. He lowered his head and kicked at the floor. The silence grew thick and tension pulled taut. She felt the dreaded sense of anticipation overcome her. She knew what he was thinking. She understood it; she had gone from a woman that had been beaten and on the verge of death by a man to one that could kill a man without any thought. He had also changed in that manner, having before been indecisive…the night at Jenson’s Farm Supply, that first kill, opening the door for his primal brutality. She had had a son, and now, she didn’t; he had lost his son, and now he had his son back. So much changed in such a short time. “I mean…we certainly look very different.” He stared at her hard then, his eyes like fire. The sudden change in direction jarred her and she looked at him with wide-e
yed curiosity. “I do miss your eyes though. More than anything else, I think.”
“Well,” Amber cleared her throat, blushing furiously. “You told me that this morning.” She laughed then and he chuckled a little in response. “It’s a good thing that we’ll be able to fool Adrian and his men.” She then glanced at him sideways, her body facing another wall full of ammo and guns. “You definitely look different too.”
“Yeah…about that…” he stated, looking warmly at her. “You’ve been avoiding me since this all happened. What’s up with that?” he asked, straightening a little with his playful attitude. Amber blushed an even deeper shade of scarlet and turned from him. She bit her bottom lip, deciding to opt for the truth since they were alone.
“It’s just…you look so different.”
“Is that a bad thing?” he asked of her, and she knew that he wanted to come near her, to touch her and mend whatever it was that seemed to be bothering her. She wished to do the same for him and to let him, but she couldn’t.
Quickly, she shook her head. “No…of course not. You…” she paused, swallowing thickly as she dropped her hand form the dusty shelf and turned to him. “You actually look really good.”
He quirked a brow at her. “Are you complimenting me?”
“I might be.”
“Are you trying to say I didn’t look good before?” he taunted her and she jerked her gaze to meet his. His were dancing with a light-heartedness she couldn’t resist smiling at.
“Quit twisting my words. You’ve always been incredibly good-looking.” She stated defensively and instantly she regretted it, as the image of him shirtless crossed her mind, followed by the sight and feel of his full naked body against hers; oh, that night so long ago, before this enemy had come into their lives. Oh God. She couldn’t become more self-aware if she tried and quickly she turned away. He chuckled lowly, the sound reverberating in his chest.
“Well then…” he began, watching her intently. It took everything she had not to meet his eyes and fight to defend herself. She knew she would ramble off onto some tangent and get carried away and he would absolutely use it against her. “I’ll take your word for it.”
“You should. You’ve always gotten me flustered.” She stated then, her voice high and teasing just the slightest. She enjoyed their little banter though her words were laced with an indescribable honesty.
“I still enjoy getting you flustered.” He told her roughly. She turned away, her cheeks flaming. He was goading at her, taunting her and wanting her to whip a retort right back just so he could make her even more self-aware. She bit her tongue and kept silent. He said nothing more, only chuckling at her lack of response and the reaction he had elicited from her. After a long silence, her chest heavy, she turned and looked at him pleadingly.
“Can I ask you a question?”
He frowned then, looking at her curiously. Her tone of voice had told him that it was semi-serious and he was preparing himself for it. “Sure. Ask away.”
She was silent for a moment before speaking. “I know I’ve been…distant and I don’t have the right to ask but…We’ve been through hell together, because of each other, for each other…and I just…Why’d you always come back for me? I never gave you any reason to…but you always have and you still do. Why? What did you ever get out of it?” she suddenly asked and she realized then just how much that question had been burning in her mind. And yet, she had never dwelled on it, had she? Not that she could remember. It just sat there in the dark recesses of her mind, waiting to be addressed. He studied her for a long drawn out moment, taking in her nervous stature, her anxious stare.
“How could I not come back for you?” he finally asked her, answering her question with a question. Quickly, he then turned and began to round the counter, his eyes searching for the ammo and guns that were littering the place from the floor to the wall. It was almost as if he was avoiding her gaze.
“That’s not really an answer.” she replied to his response and she was met with a chuckle. She rounded the corner of the counter as well, following his movements with her own as they began stacking ammo on the counter, the boxes clanging loudly against the glass counter. She licked her lips, anxious for an answer, for a reasonable response.
“Alright.” He stated. Her hand still gripped a box of ammo she had set on the counter. He removed his hand from the bow he had been holding, setting it next to the guitar. “Let’s face it: first of all, there are a handful of men out there that would give their left…” he paused, clearly tossing a word up in his mind, “…arm for a chance at having you. And even so, regardless of all of that, you always come back to me in some form or another…it’s like you are always taunting me with your presence. You’re a drug…you come to me when I need you, when I’m in hell, and you take me away from all that. How could I ever deny you? You’re strong, determined, smart…you are just fine on your own and yet…you have decided, after twenty years, to allow me to stand beside you. You ask what I ever got out of it…I got you. You’ve always waited.” He reached up then and cupped her chin, urging her gently forward. She felt her heart begin racing and she fought the urge to pull away from him; she didn’t want him hurt.
“Have you always been so good with words?” she asked quickly, feeling her heart jump into her throat.
“Hardly…but staying quiet around you for so long helps with it all.” He smiled, revealing straight white teeth. “Why do you keep coming back to me?”
She reached up, the bare tips of her fingers finding the fabric of his shirt and twisting themselves against the fabric. She glanced away from him, but he kept his hold on her chin. She thought hard for a moment, considering everything from their past and how they had always found one another. She thought of when they were children, to when they were growing up and into the adults that they now were. He had been everything, a constant of hope and desire, of friendship and loyalty, and compassionate and unconditional love…how could she not? Finally, with a wildly beating heart, she turned her brown eyes back to him.
“I’m afraid I can’t answer that with just a few short words.” She told him honestly, a giggle bubbling up in her chest. He grinned down at her and she slowly released her hold on his shirt.
“Oh, you love to torment me.”
“That I do.” She laughed then, turning to pull away from him. He held fast to her waist for a moment before reluctantly releasing her. She understood how he felt, the feeling of tearing from her. She felt it too. Still, he turned back to gathering the ammo, just as she did. He glanced sideways at her and she knew that he was going to tease her, that he was plotting some form of a comeback for her that would rope her in.
“At least you aren’t hiding from me anymore…or lying by omission.” He quipped and she looked at him in mock pain, with just the slightest hint of real regret.
“Ouch! That hurts.”
“Truth usually does.”
She turned then and narrowed her eyes at him, reminded vividly of how she had picked on Rusty earlier that morning. “You can’t take my own words and use them against me.”
He turned as well, staring her down with a smirk on his face. “I’m willing to bet I just did.”
She scoffed, laughing just the slightest before turning and gathering more ammo. She shook her head. “Just for the record, I did those things to protect you all.”
He glanced over at her and grinned, placing another box of ammo on the counter. “I know this.”
She rolled her eyes and moved two more guns to the counter, looking around them at everything that this pawn shop had to offer. “It’s amazing no one hit this shop when everything went to shit.” She stated and Miles nodded his agreement. Things were silent for a moment with the exception of the shuffling of feet as Amber and Miles carried a few guns, bows, and boxes of ammo out of the shop and to the truck.
It was nice, the sunny day with a cool breeze. It was fall, that much was obvious, and the orange and brown leaves were falling, as it was s
een on their way to the town. She inhaled deeply as she placed some guns in the back of the truck. Fall reminded her often of a quote she had once read; something about fall showing how beautiful it was to let the dead things go. After a few minutes of securing the guns and ammo in the back of the truck, she turned at the sound of breaking glass in the shop, startled. She watched with standing nerves as Miles slowly exited the shop, shifting the last box of ammo in one hand while fumbling with his pocket and his guitar in the other. Amber, relaxing a little aside the anticipation she felt deep in her stomach, smiled and lifted a curious brow at him. He stopped and shrugged at her.
“I used to play when I was younger. Give me a break.” He stated and Amber couldn’t help but laugh.
“Yeah, and I used to write in a journal. That’s long gone now. You don’t see me picking up a pen and paper, now do you?” she teased him and a strong image of guilt swept across his eyes. Quickly, however, he hid it. It had happened so fast that she almost felt as if she imagined it.
“You’ll appreciate this later. That, I can promise you.” He told her with an easy smile, any sign of remorse long gone from his eyes. She wanted to question it, but then thought better of it as something else came to her mind. She watched intently as he opened the door to the truck and glanced at her. She studied the uncertainty in his eyes, the anxiety. She moved to lean against the truck, crossing her arms and studying him.
“What’s on your mind?” she asked then and he stopped moving, the guitar resting on the backseat of the truck. His clenched his jaw as if chewing over what he was going to say. “Something’s been on your mind for a few days now…it’s just worse today. What’s up?” she prodded and finally he turned to her, leaning slightly against the door.
