by Toni DeMaio
I hugged her. “That’s a great idea, Sweetie, I know Lilly will want us to come and I’d love to if it’s okay with your dad.”
Gino smiled gratefully. “Are you kidding me? Kat, you’re an angel! I really am a lousy hairdresser.”
“Then it’s a date,” Tori said, beaming up at me.
My mom reached over under the table and gave my thigh a squeeze. Maybe she was right and things were going better than I’d thought… in spite of the gorgeous new girl right under Gino’s nose.
CHAPTER TWELVE
TORI
I was asleep even though it didn’t feel much like it. I was dreaming again as if it were really happening. You know, like I was fully conscious and actually there, and not like one of those crazy dreams where I wear my Hello Kitty pajamas to WALMART, then fill a shopping cart up to the top with Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups before I realize I don’t know where Daddy is and I haven’t got any money with me.
This was different. I was sitting on the swing in the park where I go to meet Angel. She hadn’t shown up yet and I wasn’t so sure I even wanted to see her because I didn’t know how to feel about her being Kat’s sister. It was confusing and a little embarrassing. Last time we talked I hadn’t known she was Kat’s sister and I was such a brat saying mean things about Kat, especially when she turned out to be so cool.
I can’t figure out why Angel didn’t call me out on it. I mean, I was talking about her sister. I know her family isn’t Italian and maybe that’s why, but in our family no one
outside of it gets to say anything nasty about any one of us without a good fight. That’s just the way it is with us.
But then Angel isn’t alive anymore and maybe the rules change when you go to Heaven. Maybe you don’t take offense anymore like we do on earth. I guess the best way to handle it is to just ask her straight out. But I feel really dumb.
“Hey, Tori!”
I turned and there was Angel, without her purple wings, and just wearing a white dress with her shiny golden hair in waves down past her shoulders. She looked just like the way I imagined she must have looked when she tried to go to that dance back when she was a teenager; really gorgeous like a supermodel, and she was smiling at me and didn’t look mad at all.
I jumped off the swing and faced her. “I have to apologize, Angel,” I said, “I’m really sorry I said that dumb stuff about Kat when I first told you about her.”
I should have known not to worry because she just laughed and pulled me in for a hug. I hugged her back and said, “I was afraid Kat was going to come between me and my dad, but she’s not like that.”
“I knew you two hadn’t met and I wanted you to make up your own mind about her. That’s how this guide thing I do works. I listen and try to help you think things through because you have free choice, and it’s up to you to make your own decisions; it’s how your soul grows.”
“Like growing up?”
“Like growing up, and in many ways we keep on growing up forever.”
“Wow. I bet my Nonna has learned a lot because she is the oldest person in our family.”
“I’m sure she has,” Angel said, taking my hand and walking me to a picnic table. “And I’m glad you let me into your dream tonight, Tori, because I wanted to apologize to you, too. I feel bad about just appearing at my mom’s party the other night without giving you a head’s up. I hope I didn’t give you too much of a scare.”
“I wasn’t scared at all,” I explained, “but I was confused because you never mentioned to me that you’re Kat’s sister, and it was also the first time I met your mom. She’s really nice, your mom!”
“I know, Sweetheart. And even though my mom thinks of me as an
Angel and I was dressed like one at the party, I’m actually not a real angel, yet. But I am a guide and my assignment is to help all of you in every way I can. “Look! Clover!” she slid off the bench and sat on the grass, so I sat next to her and I could smell roses, too; so many of them grew in that park all around us and in every color a rose can be.
The thick grass was soft and ticklish against my bare legs and I pulled my nightgown down over my feet. “I didn’t know you were a model when you were alive. Dad said you were famous. That must have been fun.”
She shrugged, poking through the clover and finally finding one with four leaves. “For you!” she said and handed it to me. “Modeling was fun for a while, but honestly, I got bored with it.”
“I would never get bored with modeling in a hundred years!” I said. “And I bet you made a lot of money.”
She shrugged again and didn’t look very happy. “I did, but there are more important things in life than money. Someday you’ll know that.”
“Maybe,” I said, not thinking for a minute I ever would. “But it would be amazing to be able to buy whatever you want whenever you want it.”
She smiled and touched my cheek. “It was for a while, Tori, but then I realized the most important thing is Love, not money. Real happiness is always based in Love. And you can’t buy that.”
I thought about what she’d said for a while. “I guess…I mean I love my family and my friends. And the love I have for my mom is so big it hurts my heart sometimes… if I think about it too much.”
Angel nodded, “Sometimes it does hurt to love, but it’s always worth it. Love is the most powerful force in the universe, you know.”
I thought about that for a minute. “What about gravity,” I asked.
She threw her head back and laughed. “It’s up there, too!”
“So why did you come to your mom’s party and let us see you when we were awake? I’ve been wondering about that. And I’m pretty sure…only your mom, your sister, and I could see you. Why is that?”
“That’s because I just wanted the three of you to be able to see me. I wanted you three to know I’m around, looking out for you…always.”
This was getting heavy. “So you’re saying you guide all of us; Mrs. Donovan, Kat, and me, too? And that’s it?”
“I’m assigned to the three of you, Tori…and that’s it. Believe me it’s enough.”
Angel’s smile is really beautiful and it always makes me feel better. She’d given me a lot to think about so I stood up and went to sit on the swing, pumping my legs and trying to touch the low hanging branches on the big flowery tree above us. Angel followed me and soon her swing was moving right along with mine.
“I can understand why you’re guiding your mom and your sister, but why me? I’m not in your family.”
“I think of you as family and sometimes we get these assignments to guide certain people because our experiences on earth were similar to the ones that person is having in their lifetime. And we can’t always get through in dreams, so I’m really glad your soul is letting me in.”
“So you’re saying you and I have had some of the same experiences?”
“That’s exactly what I’m saying, Tori.” I could feel a change in her and then she said, in a very serious voice, “I know about Uncle Mario. I know all about Uncle Mario and Gia. I want to help you to avoid going through what Gia is going through, and what I went through at your age.”
We stared at each other and I didn’t know what I was supposed to say. My heart was banging around really hard, and I couldn’t believe what she’d just told me.
“And I want to help you save Gia, and yourself before it’s too late; before it gets even worse. I’m so grateful you have the ability to see and hear me so I can help you, Sweetheart.”
“You mean not everybody can see their guide?”
“I wish everybody could, but no, not everyone believes in us and that makes you special.”
Angel sounded sad and as I started to think about everything she’d gone through when she was my age, the same thing Gia was going though, I thought I was going to be sick. And all I wanted to do was wake up and pretend this had all been a stupid dream.
Then Angel stopped both of our swings and she held me tight and we both sat on
the grass again, and I cried harder than I ever have before.
She stroked my hair and her voice was soft and gentle in my ear, “You know you’ve got to trust your dad and tell him what you saw. It isn’t safe for you to spend the night with Gia at her house. Uncle Mario is a bad man. He thinks he can get away with anything, and so far he has. If he thinks you’re a threat to him, he is going to try to hurt you, and possibly, Anthony and Sal, too.”
“No!” I screamed, and pulled away from her. Feeling helpless and angry, I grabbed handfuls of the silky grass up out of the ground and flung them away from me and then I beat the ground with my fists. “I’ll never let him hurt my little brother…or my cousins! I’ll kill him first myself!”
Angel was calm as she reached for me and she pulled me back onto her lap. “No, Sweetheart, you won’t kill anybody. It isn’t in your nature. But you will have to gather your courage and make the tough decision to tell your father. And you have to trust he will believe you.”
“But I promised Gia not to tell. She begged me. Uncle Mario will hurt her really bad if Dad tells Aunt Lisa and then the whole family will go crazy and we don’t know for sure if anybody will even believe us. Aunt Lisa is happy with Uncle Mario. And she was so sad and depressed when Uncle Leo died. If she does believe us she’ll be devastated all over again, and if she doesn’t, it will be even worse. She’ll hate us both forever. There’s no right thing to do!”
“But there is! You must ask your father for help. Or go to Kat and my mom. I know they’ll believe you. Please promise me you won’t try to handle this alone.”
I was more confused than ever. “I have to talk to Gia first because I gave her my word.”
“Yes,” Angel said, “I know that. You need to convince Gia that you both have to tell either your dad or Kat, or both of them together.”
I stood and walked away from her, ready to wake up. I’d had all I could take for now. “I’ll talk to Gia tonight. I’m sleeping over there and don’t try to talk me out of it. Saturday night is when Uncle Mario comes in her room because that’s the night Aunt Lisa works late. I promised Gia I wouldn’t leave her alone with him like that again and I won’t break my promise.”
“Alright,” I heard Angel say as I began to wake up in my own bed, “But you won’t be alone. I promise you that.” And as I opened my clenched fist, I was shocked to see a squished up four leaf clover in my hand. I pressed it inside my diary because it came from Angel’s Heaven and that made it super amazing. I felt stronger knowing we wouldn’t be alone tonight. Angel’s promises were as real as that four leaf clover.
***
I wished Gia used a nightlight, but I had a suspicion that had everything to do with Uncle Mario. I’m sure he wanted to keep it really dark in her room. I could barely see my hand in front of my face when we first closed the door and climbed in bed together.
Poor Gia was so scared she was shivering so I gave her my fleece robe to put on. She had also put two pairs of underwear on under her flannel pajamas, hoping to make it harder for Uncle Mario to mess with her if he had the nerve to creep into her room and try it with me right there.
The only plan we could come up with was that we’d both sleep in her bed and that way maybe he would leave her alone. I didn’t want to think what might happen if that didn’t work.
We were completely alone in the house with him since Dad had taken Sal and Anthony to the Sponge Bob movie at the mall and then, later, Sal was sleeping over at our house. We were all supposed to meet at early mass in the morning and then we’d go to Nonna’s for Sunday dinner at noon like we always do.
I had tried for over an hour to convince Gia to sneak out with me and call Kat at the gas station on the corner and have her come and pick us up. I knew she would take us to her mom’s and I also believed they would both believe our story because of what had happened to Angel when she was a kid. I was sure Kat would never let anything happen to either of us.
I knew she’d be able to convince Dad and even Aunt Lisa that we weren’t lying, but Gia was too terrified of Uncle Mario to risk it. And I also knew a part of that was her fear of hurting Aunt Lisa. She never wanted to see her cry like she had when her father died.
Uncle Leo was a really good skier and he used to ski all the time, but it was the end of the season and this one day it started to rain and the trails got icy fast. He was on his way down the tallest mountain at Camelback when he slammed into a tree and hit his head. He died a week later.
We were both in a bad situation here because I totally understood why Gia didn’t want to hurt Aunt Lisa, but I knew Angel was right when she told me we were in over our heads and we needed to ask for help. At least for tonight she was going to stay nearby.
I wondered what Angel could even do, though, if Uncle Mario did come in and start messing with Gia. I couldn’t imagine it, but I knew she was as good as her word and she would do her best to stop him.
We talked for a while about school and some of our friends and what teachers we liked the best and then Gia got quiet and drifted off, but I couldn’t sleep at all.
I lay stiff and frightened in the pitch-black room, straining to hear footsteps out in the hall. I don’t know how late it was when my worst nightmare began. The door creaked as it slowly opened. I got so scared I thought for sure he’d be able to hear my heart thumping and I was certain it would make the bed shake.
Once inside, Uncle Mario closed the door behind him, being careful not to make a sound. I was pretty sure Gia was in a deep sleep because her breathing was regular as if she were peacefully dreaming. So I decided to pretend I was asleep too, hoping he’d just go away.
I tried to see if I could tell where Uncle Mario was in the thick, black darkness, but before I could make out his shape, I felt the covers lift. Uncle Mario sighed, as his hand touched my thigh and slowly crept up toward my private places.
I jumped into a sitting position, gasping for breath and gripped by the worst sick feeling I’d ever felt. “Uncle Mario!” I cried out in a shaky voice, “Is that you?”
The hand dropped away from me and he said, “Is that you, Tori? Why aren’t you in the other bed?”
“I…I don’t know,” I stammered, “Gia felt like talking and I guess we fell asleep…”
His voice was soft and silky and more scary that a shout. “I know you saw me in here last week, Tori”. I hated hearing him speak my name. “I also know you could tell what I was doing. I’m right, and you know it.”
My throat was dry but I tried to answer him. “I…I don’t know what you mean,” I whispered.
In my frantic mind, I prayed for Angel to come right then. I prayed she would swoop in on her purple wings and scare the crap out of him.
Uncle Mario began to chuckle softly. “Oh, I think you know exactly what I mean. Why else would you be in the bed with Gia? Maybe you girls want to make it a party. You’d like that, wouldn’t you, Tori? I’ve been watching you lately and you’re a very pretty little girl. I can tell you know that. I think you’ve been teasing me and hoping I’d come in here to visit you, too. That’s okay, Sweetheart, everybody needs a little love…”
What kind of twisted love was he talking about? His hand tickled my leg again and I tried to pull the covers closer around my legs and to swat him away, but he grabbed me by the wrist and pulled my arm up and over my head.
“No!” I cried loudly, “Stop it, Uncle Mario! I’ll tell my daddy, I swear I will!”
I must have awakened Gia because she began to sob softly, “Please don’t. Please don’t,” she pleaded.
My voice was barely a squeak, “Get away from us!” I said, as he laughed in my face and held me down on the bed; then grabbed my other hand and pushed both hands
into my chest with his one hand, using his other one to try to touch me just like I’d seen him touch Gia. My chest really hurt and it was hard to breathe.
“If you just relax, Tori, it will feel really nice…nicer than you know…” his voice was raspy and ugly.
> I began to cry too, just like Gia, but I fought back. I bucked around and wiggled and reared up until I got one hand free, then I dug my nails as hard as I could into his wandering hand and he jumped back for a second. “You little bitch!” he yelped. “You cut me!”
And then the door to the hall sprang open with a bang like a gunshot as it hit the wall and the light from the hallway spread over all of us as if we were caught in the beam of a big flashlight. I saw him looming over us, his arm drawn back as if getting ready to hit me; but then, as fast as lightning, the crucifix hanging over Gia’s bed flew off the wall and hit Uncle Mario on the side of his head.
He yelped and grabbed at his head, looking angry and frightened and crazy all at the same time as he fell back onto the floor, shouting, “What the hell? Who did that?”
I quickly scrambled out of the bed, dragging Gia after me as we both ran down the hallway and into the bathroom. I shoved her inside, then slammed the door and turned the lock.
Gia’s legs gave out and she sank to the floor, sobbing and pulling at her long hair, looking terrified. “Who did that?” she gasped, “Somebody knocked him down! Who’s here?”
I grabbed her and rocked her like a baby while she gasped and shuddered, her eyes filled with terror.
“You’re not going to believe this,” I said, “but I think I know who it was. This sounds crazy but I’ve got a guardian angel named Angelica, and she used to be Kat’s sister when she was alive. But she died from a heart condition a long time ago, and now she looks out for me. She told me she’d come tonight if we needed her.”
“What?” Gia screeched, pulling away and staring at me as if I was scaring her more than Uncle Mario ever had.
