Alexander pushed his glasses up his nose but also kept a few feet of distance between himself and my boyfriend. “Night.”
After the three of them disappeared, Logan finally waved to the other end of the barracks, coming out of whatever trance he’d been in. “I live down there.”
“You don’t live with those three?”
He shook his head. “Dominant wolves get their own living space.”
Why am I not surprised?
We resumed walking, and the silence stretched between us. All that did was remind me that I was still getting to know Logan. He’d never mentioned before that he was dominant over his friends, and I still didn’t really know who Crystal was, other than someone from back home.
I frowned. Although, it seemed pretty obvious Crystal was his ex—an ex who still had it bad for him. Since everyone kept mentioning her, I wondered if their breakup was fresh, or if they’d been really serious at one point. And given the text I saw from her the previous month—the text in which she’d stated that she missed him and wondered when he could call—I had a feeling she wanted to get back together with him.
Jealousy shot through me, making the dark power roll.
I took a deep breath and stuffed my hands into my pockets. It was possible I was right, that Crystal and Logan had been together for years and had only recently broken up. Or maybe Crystal was some kind of celebrity in the werewolf world, so their breakup had been public knowledge. Or maybe Crystal was another SF member who just happened to know Logan from their home state, and that was the reason everyone kept referring to her. Perhaps I’d seen Crystal during my SF tour, but since I’d had no idea what she looked like, I hadn’t known.
That thought made me stumble.
Logan automatically reached for me, but I righted myself at the last moment, pulling away from him before he could touch me. Just thinking of Logan with another woman made the dark power angry.
Very angry.
I took several deep breaths, trying to push it down. The cold darkness hovered dangerously close to my fingertips.
Knowing the tension strumming through me wasn’t going to diminish, and the only chance I had of calming the dark power was to know the full truth, I blurted, “Logan, who’s Crystal? You gotta tell me. Who is she?”
His jaw tightened, but he wouldn’t look at me.
I held my breath.
He kept walking, his footsteps quiet and his head down. The last door to the barracks waited ahead. I figured that was where we were headed.
“Logan?”
“I told you. She’s a girl from back home and nobody you need to be worried about.”
I groaned, the dark power growing again. He’d just given me the same damned evasive answer as he had the other week. “But who is she? An ex-girlfriend? Someone you had a fling with? Someone who works with you here? Who?” The urge to stomp my foot grew so strong that I had to take another deep breath.
The muscle in Logan’s jaw ticked. For a moment, I didn’t think he was going to answer, but then he said, “Just someone from back home. Okay?”
In other words, he’s not going to tell me.
I closed my eyes and took a deep calming breath before opening them. Images of a young Logan laughing and running through Wyoming fields with a beautiful girl at his side flashed through my mind. Just the thought of someone who shared that history with him made me want to barf.
The door loomed in front of us. “This is me.” He stopped at the door, his expression apprehensive, but his stubborn resolve told me he wasn’t going to divulge his past with Crystal—no matter how many times I asked.
The dark tension and brooding jealousy coursing through me felt like bugs crawling under my skin, but at that moment, I knew what I needed to do.
More than anything, I wanted the carefree, easygoing laughter that had filled our time together from before Logan revealed his dominance and before Crystal’s ghost slunk between us.
I didn’t want this, and I didn’t want his past to come between us. After all, whoever Crystal was, she was in the past. I needed to remember that.
No more questions about Crystal, Dar, just stop.
Besides, whatever the truth was—as much as morbid curiosity urged me to learn it—I didn’t actually want to know. In fact, it was probably better if I didn’t, and perhaps Logan realized that.
Forcing myself to take another deep breath, I opened the door and stepped into the building. It took another moment to calm the dark power, but when I finally felt in control, I peeked up at Logan. “Are you doing okay, by the way?”
His head snapped back, as if surprised by my question. “I’m fine.”
“Anyone can see you’re not fine.”
It suddenly occurred to me that for the first time since I’d met him, Logan was upset about something that had nothing to do with me, and all I’d cared about was some girl from his past. I hadn’t cared about him in the present.
Worst girlfriend ever.
I mentally kicked myself.
The door closed behind us, but he remained silent.
“You don’t seem fine. You seem upset,” I added.
He ran a hand through his hair.
“You can talk to me, too, you know. It’s not a one-way street. You’re always caring for me, looking after me, but I can do the same for you.”
His eyes glowed subtly, a tenderness that hadn’t been there a moment ago shining through. “You’re incredible. Do you know that?”
A small smile lifted my lips, the dark power calming completely at the shift in energy between us. “If I didn’t know better, I’d say you were avoiding the subject.”
That groove appeared between his eyes again. “I’m not used to talking about myself. My job isn’t to worry about me. It’s to worry about others.”
“You mean as an … alpha or whatever?”
His jaw locked, and I held my breath.
Then, he nodded.
I let out the breath I’d been holding. “And since I’m now asking about you, that doesn’t sit well with you?”
“No, it’s not that.” He raised a finger and brushed it across my cheek, the movement quick and fleeting. Still, it was enough touch for my dark power to tingle, but that was all. My light stayed calmed with him, and a contented sigh ran through me. “I’m just not used to it.”
I stepped closer to him. “I want to be here for you too. To be honest, I’m not entirely sure what’s going on with you right now, but I want to understand.”
His gaze held mine, the glow in his eyes intensifying. “I lost my shit back there,” he finally replied. “I’m not very happy with myself right now.”
“Does that happen often? That you lose control?”
“No. I can’t remember the last time I did.” A dark look crossed his face again. “Speaking like that to my friends, my fellow SF members, and my boss … commanding everyone like that … commanding you like that.” He shook his head, his lip curling. “That’s not to be taken lightly, and I shouldn’t have done it.”
The memory of goose bumps rising along my skin and wanting to cower under the covers flashed to the forefront of my mind. “No, I suppose it’s not, but you have to admit, Chloe was really goading you. She kept pushing you for a reaction.”
He scowled. “And I gave her one.”
“You were standing up for me,” I said hesitantly. “You were protecting me. I’m not saying that forgives all behaviors on your part, but your actions originated from a good place, and I…” I bit my lip. “It means a lot to me when you have my back.”
He chuckled softly. “I should blame you for this, is that it?” His amusement vanished. “You bring out something in me, Daria Gresham. A side of myself I can’t control.”
I wanted so much to step forward and touch him. “You bring out feelings in me too. Things I’ve never felt before and can’t control either.”
The light in his eyes grew, but he abruptly looked away and raked a hand through his hair. “Still. I
can’t be doing shit like that. I could get kicked out of the SF.” That groove appeared between his eyes again, reminding me of his meeting with Wes in the morning.
“Yeah, I get it. You wield a power I didn’t even know you had, but right now, maybe you should cut yourself some slack.”
He smiled. “Is that your official recommendation?”
“It is. And trust me, I’m a healer.” I waggled my eyebrows.
He laughed, the sound sending an eruption of fresh shivers along my skin. The shift in his mood and the stormy look in his eyes fading made lightness that hadn’t been there in a while fill my chest.
“So,” I said coyly, “are you going to show me where you live?”
His smile stayed in place, the agitated energy coming off him disappearing. “Follow me.”
Chapter 14
Logan led me down the hall. At the last door, he stopped and inserted a key into a lock. Just above the dead bolt hovered a holographic panel.
“What’s that?” I asked, pointing at it.
“That’s what I use if I forget my keys. It can unlock the door without a key … another invention the sorcerers came up with.” He swung open the door. “Brodie uses them a lot, especially when he’s been out drinking for the night and loses his keys.”
We stepped into Logan’s apartment, and he closed the door behind us before moving into the living room to turn on a lamp.
Soft light flooded the room, and I kicked off my shoes, my feet sinking into thick carpet. I paused, taking it all in.
Off to the right lay a large living room with two couches, a few tables, a standing lamp, and a TV hanging on the wall.
On the left, a counter with stools that overlooked the open kitchen cut an L shape in the room. The kitchen wasn’t big, but it held all of the necessities. For the most part, it looked like a normal kitchen devoid of any magical devices.
His entire apartment felt masculine. It didn’t have any knickknacks or pictures on the walls. The entire color scheme was silver and dark blue, a slightly modern feeling due to the simplicity, but I liked it.
“My bedroom’s back that way.” He nodded toward the hallway off the living room. “Just across from it is the bathroom.” He took my bags and set them on the floor. “How are you feeling? Did you want to sit down? Take a shower? Watch TV?”
I glanced at my leg. Even though I felt tired and hungry, Rose had been right. My werewolf bite no longer plagued me, and I was curious to see what waited under the bandage. “Yeah, a shower sounds good.”
He led me to the bathroom and pulled out a fresh towel. Logan’s scent and broad shoulders filled the cramped space. Tingles of awareness shot through me. One step to the right, one lift of my hand, and I would be running my palm along his back, feeling his hard torso and sinewy muscles.
Logan turned, his nostrils flaring and his eyes hooded. “Too bad I can’t shower with you.”
My breath stopped as I pictured Logan—naked—in the shower with me, running his large hands over my body, cupping my breasts, sucking my core.
“Yeah,” I replied breathlessly. “Too bad.”
With a regretful look in his eyes, he stepped out, closing the door behind him. Alone in the room, I stripped my clothes off and pulled the gauze from my leg.
All thoughts of Logan’s hands running along my skin vanished. My jaw dropped. No way!
I turned my leg back and forth, examining my smooth calf. The puncture holes from the werewolf bite were completely gone.
I closed my eyes, tuning in to the dark power. It rushed forward, filling my belly with coldness. It felt so different from my light.
My eyes flashed open again, going to my nonexistent wound. Not even a faint scar remained. The dark power did this.
I didn’t know how I knew that, but I did. My light couldn’t heal me, not unless I was in a healing session and burning away somebody else’s disease. That meant the darkness had to be behind it.
Trembling, I turned on the shower and stepped under the warm spray, then I scrubbed myself clean.
I concentrated on the various products Logan had in his shower, anything to distract myself from my latest discovery.
Men’s shaving cream, a razor, and shampoo that held a hint of sandalwood sat on the shelf. The sparse products matched the rest of his apartment’s simplistic design.
Once clean, I hastily turned off the water and stepped out, grabbing the towel hanging on the rack. When I turned to grab my bag, my naked body stared back at me in the large mirror hanging over the sink.
I trailed a hand down my bare chest, over the heavy weight of my breasts, to my stomach. Just beneath my palm, my powers responded, my light rattling in the cage that I kept it in. I closed my eyes. In a way, my light and the dark power were like life forces inside me, like unborn twins I would never give birth to.
“Dar?” A soft knock came on the door.
I jumped.
“I heard the shower stop. Are you hungry?”
I hastily wrapped the towel around myself. “Yeah, I’m actually starving. I’ll be right out!” I dug around in my bag for my pajamas.
As usual, my pajamas weren’t matronly. I donned the short shorts and the thin top before running a comb through my hair. Once done, I eyed myself again in the mirror. Dark circles through my shirt hinted at my areolas. A flush stained my cheeks.
He’s going to think you’re doing this on purpose.
When I opened the door, Logan still stood in the hallway, and his gaze immediately dipped down.
My nipples hardened, and a rush of desire clenched my core.
His jaw locked, the muscle ticking in the corner. “Fuck me,” he whispered and hastily took a step away. “Be right back.”
He disappeared from the hallway, moving so fast that I knew his werewolf gene had kicked in. A second later, he reappeared, holding one of his sweatshirts out. “You’d better put this on and zipper it completely closed. For my sake. Please.”
The desire in my core flamed. “Not just for your sake.” I zippered his sweatshirt to my throat, and the material effectively covered me to midthigh in a huge shapeless tent.
He turned stiffly, and I followed him back to the kitchen, trying desperately to not devour his sexy swagger.
Down, girls.
My nose twitched, catching heavenly scents coming from the stove. I took another deep breath, trying to douse my desire by focusing on dinner.
“You know how to cook?” I settled onto a stool at the counter, overlooking the kitchen.
Logan went to the stove and stirred something in a pot. “A little. I’m not a chef, but I keep myself from starving.”
From the scent coming from the bubbling sauce, I guessed he’d made something Italian. Sure enough, Logan grabbed a box of pasta and dumped the noodles into a pot of boiling water.
With his back to me, I let my gaze wander over his broad shoulders and heavily muscled back. His muscles bunched and tensed with his movements. When he turned to the pantry to grab some garlic, my gaze dipped to his flat abdomen and the subtle swagger of his hips.
Swallowing tightly, I pulled his sweatshirt more tightly around me, just as he turned a knowing look my way, his nostrils flaring.
A few minutes later, he served up two plates of steaming spaghetti covered in a rich meat sauce.
“Wow, this smells good.” My stomach grumbled, reminding me it had been a long time since lunch.
“Wine?” he asked, holding up a bottle of Merlot.
“Sure.”
After sitting on the stool beside me, he held up his drink. “Cheers. To our first dinner alone together.”
I cocked my head. “What about that fast food restaurant we went to?” That had been after I’d met Dillon Parker at the diner, before I knew he was my stalker.
“We weren’t alone. That was in public.”
I clinked my glass with his. “In that case, cheers. Hopefully, this is the first of many.”
The ring around his irises grew brighter, but
so did an emotion in his eyes. Worry? But he turned away before I could fully assess his reaction to my toast.
I took a sip of the wine, my hand trembling. Dry berry flavors burst over my tongue, but I barely tasted it.
Logan’s worry only reminded me of my current reality.
I had a dark power that could kill people and I couldn’t control it, yet a voice in my mind had told me how to fight the rogues which made no sense whatsoever.
My body recognized Logan as a potential mate, but if I stayed with him and he became the father of my sole child, I had no idea if my attraction to him would remain. Because even though I genuinely liked Logan, my out-of-control lust for him could all be linked to him being a potential mate. Who was to say that attraction would stay once he fathered my child? It certainly hadn’t for my mother and my nan.
And the only potential hope I had at finding answers to explain anything were in the community, but already, I’d made enemies, and I’d only just arrived.
I sipped my wine again and did my best to concentrate on our first dinner together.
Chapter 15
I twirled spaghetti onto my fork and popped the bite into my mouth. The rich sauce and the soft noodles distracted me momentarily. I closed my eyes and savored it. “This is really good.”
“I’ll tell my mom that. It’s her favorite meal.”
I was in the midst of twirling pasta on my fork, but my movements paused, my breath quickening. There it was, the perfect opportunity to learn more about him and his family.
I cleared my throat and resumed twirling. “How … uh, how often do you see your mom?”
Logan took another large bite, his jaw working rhythmically. “I used to go home every few weeks. Now, not so much.”
Okaaaay… I made myself take a bite and chew so my eagerness wouldn’t be so apparent. “What’s your home like?”
“We own a ranch in the mountains. Dad has around two thousand head of cattle, and every time I’m home, I help him with work. Since my brother still lives in my hometown and since my sister still lives at home, they’re always there, too, and so is my mom.”
Power in Darkness Page 12
