by David James
And then I realized, “Marcus had to be working for them all along.”
“I saw him in my dreams,” Calum said, his eyes darting back and forth. “He came to me. Spoke with me and tried to touch me but he couldn’t.”
“He should have been able to,” I said. “He’s so powerful. Maybe it’s because of who you are.”
Calum was quiet. His legs shook unsteadily against mine. “I’m sorry, Kate, but what do we do now?”
Remorse bit my tongue. Why am I hiding? I’m a Warrior. I should be fighting with the others, not running away like a coward.
I ground my teeth together. “I don’t know. He’s too powerful. Even if all the Warriors stood as one, we’d die instantly; we’re trained to fight the Orieno, not the Siblings themselves. I’ve never done anything to prepare for this. No one has.”
He put his hand on mine. I didn’t push it away.
My sisters.
I’m not running away, I’m running to find them.
Truth will set me free.
I almost felt safe if not for the fear in my heart.
“We still need to find the key,” Calum reminded me. He closed his eyes and leaned his head against a box. “It might be our only hope in stopping this war. With it I know we can win.”
“You can’t know that.”
He said, “I believe we can.”
“Why?”
He shrugged. “Because I believe in you.”
“But why? Calum, you don’t know me. You can’t believe in someone you don’t even know.”
A shy grin played at the edges of his mouth and he said, “Maybe I don’t know you as well as I should, but I know you better than you think. I know that you miss your parents even though you hate them. I know that you loved someone once, before you came to the Order, and that you regret not meeting him that night. I know you are loyal and smart and incredibly stubborn. I know that sometimes you second guess yourself, but always have the best intentions. And I know that you will do anything to find your sisters and make sure they’re safe.”
I swallowed. “You don’t know me.”
“Yes, I do, Kate.”
“No,” I said, my voice flat, “you don’t.”
Suddenly, the siren died. It sputtered and coughed like a bird shot down from the sky and, just before it crashed to nothing, exploded in one last ear-piercing roar.
Calum looked at me in that way I hated and, in a voice filled with quiet determination that resonated loudly in the aftermath of the siren, said, “I want to know you, Kate.”
I was not afraid.
I was terrified.
-Calum-
My chest rose and fell, harboring a silent scream. If I let it out we would die in seconds.
I closed my eyes and leaned my head back. My hand was hot in Kate’s, and I knew I needed it to stay there. I pulled them to my chest, holding tightly to their warmth. I felt better entwined with her like this, less afraid.
Filled with fear, but less afraid of what that meant.
Still, why didn’t things just stay the same? I had been happy. I was happy with Tyler and Mom and my friends back in Lakewood Hollow.
I almost laughed.
No, I never was, I thought. I’d always known something was missing. I had never felt like myself.
Now, even though I’d lost so much, I felt alive and a different kind of anger began to erupt inside me, from a brave new place, and my heart filled with the urge to fight.
This was my time. Ours.
Beside me, Kate whispered, “Why is this happening?”
“What do you mean?”
She leaned close and pulled her hands from mine, balling them into fists. “I mean why now? You’re the Caeles, the one born a thousand times before, so why are we just trying to figure all this out now? You should have the answers, Calum! Why didn’t you stop this war a hundred years ago?” Her fists pounded against my chest, softly at first, then harder until I was numb to everything else but the feeling.
With every blow, I thought, No one can have all the answers, no matter who they are.
I grabbed both her hands, held them as tightly as I could, and shook them as I said, “Kate, be quiet! They’ll hear us.”
Her eyes blazed a furious violet in the dim room, and her teeth bared white. “I don’t care! Why didn’t you stop this! You could have saved us all! You could have saved my sisters!”
I whispered, “In all my past lives I don’t think I’ve ever been in love. Orion said that love would be the only reason the Devil could find me; he said it would be the only way to free the Guard. So, I couldn’t have been, otherwise they’d already be free. Orion said that in every past life, I’ve died before I even get the chance to live, to love.”
“Calum, I-”
“Can you believe that, Kate? I’ve always died before I’ve loved. I don’t remember why. Maybe I’ve never found a reason to fall in love, never let myself. I don’t remember anything, other than a flash of purple light blinding me. Even in this life I’ve dreamed of it. Of you, Kate. I think I’ve been searching for you. I think I always want to remember you, find you.”
Kate blinked and, for that one fleeting moment, I felt my heart drop as her eyes disappeared. “What do you mean? How?”
“Your eyes,” I said, squeezing her hand. “I might not know that much about you in this life, Kate, but from the first moment I saw you, I’ve known your eyes as if I’ve seen them a million times before. I remember when I saw you back in Mr. Brandt’s room, and all I could see was violet. It was as though I remembered that color from somewhere; as though I’d known you before.”
She shook her head. “That can’t be right, Calum. I’m not immortal. I’m just me. Nothing more.”
Calum smiled. “That’s where you’re wrong. When I look in your eyes, I know I’ve seen them before. But you’re right that you don’t die over and over again like me. You are mortal, and this is your first life. But it isn’t mine.”
I breathed, “I think I’ve finally found a reason to fall in love, Kate. That’s why this time is so different. You might be my reason. I think I’ve been searching for you for a thousand lifetimes.”
-Kate-
Lies.
Calum’s voice rang in my thoughts just as a cacophony of voices exploded outside the door; harsh shouts of power and courage and fear, and one scream filled with bloodlust. How many were out there? Thirty? Hundreds? Thousands? It sounded like more.
Calum tapped my knee. “Kate, what do we do when they find us?”
“Fight and run,” I said, choking back words I didn’t want to say. I bit down hard on my tongue, felt it pop, and swallowed my blood as though it were my secret.
I could swear I remember your eyes, too, Calum.
I closed my eyes against the sounds of Warriors dying, against the inhuman howl of Marcus changed, and breathed against my own fear. “Gae said that we need to run toward truth.”
“What do you think she wants us to do?”
“Only the witches know the truth of the prophecy.” My eyes blinked open. “We need to get to the Woman of Prophecy. No one, not even Marcus, is allowed to see her unless she summons them first. He lied during the trial; he couldn’t have known the complete prophecy. I don’t think anyone’s actually seen her in the past century except for my parents. The witch must know something we don’t about the prophecy.”
“Maybe she has the key.”
“Maybe.”
I thought, Maybe she has the answers I need.
“Do you know how to get there?” he asked.
“Yes,” I choked. “Gae showed me the way a long time ago. But we need to hurry. Once we get out of here we won’t have long until the sun sets again. And Ashfall is miles away. If what Gae said is true, that’s when Morphis will come back, stronger than ever.”
“Do you trust what she said?”
“With my life.” I breathed, in and out and in, and said, “Calum. If something happens to me, I want you to-”
I nodded, but my words were lost to thoughts.
Marcus had been everything to me.
Adam had been everything.
My parents and sisters.
Everyone who once had been anything to me is gone.
“Trust me, please,” Calum pleaded.
All these lies surrounded me; I could barely breathe in this thick, fetid wasteland of half-truths.
“Why would you help me when a war is happening right outside? There are so many other people to save. We might die, Calum. Why would you ignore all that to help me?”
“It’s what you need, Kate.” He sighed. “Both you and Orion have told me that I’ve died so many times before, it’s impossible to count how many lives I’ve lived. And out of all those lives, this same war has persisted. But still, the only thing I remember is the way your eyes make me stop breathing, make me feel alive as if this was my first life all over again. And that’s the thing: You don’t let me forget. I’ve tried so hard for the past few days to forget my father, the Bloodletter, my friends, my past, but you wouldn’t let me. You make me remember that I have a future, and that maybe, some day, it might be good. Maybe my future is worth living for.”
Calum looked into my eyes and I found myself lost in the blue once more. He leaned close, pressing his legs against mine, molding his warm hands to my shoulders and, just as a soft chill ran up my spine, he whispered, “I’m not ignoring the war, or the people that need saving, but you’re worth fighting for too, Kate. In fact, I think I’ve been fighting to be with you, for this moment, forever. That’s why.”
I breathed in and in and in and couldn’t find the air to breathe out.
Calum smiled. “Breathe, Kate.” He touched my face, warm against warm, and reached behind my neck to pull me close. I felt his nose tickle my neck, felt him breathe in and out when I couldn’t. In my ear, he said, “I’ve got you.”
I closed my eyes, felt the walls Adam had trapped me inside close in and-
Adam.
“What are you doing?” I asked...
...“I’m holding you,” he said.
Adam.
Black bits of Adam nothing.
found nothing but darkness there.
Adam was gone.
When I opened my eyes, there was only warmth and Calum and-
an earsplitting crash against the door, sending cracks of ceiling rock falling down on us.
“Kate!” Calum shouted, grabbing my shoulders and pushing himself away from me as two shards of black rock fell between us.
I saw my leviti over Calum’s shoulder, the red bright in the dim room. I heard voices outside, phantom feet pounding around us like sounds of thunder. Screams. I heard blood burst from Warrior mouths.
And I was in here. Hiding.
More rock fell. The entire house shook.
Then, as though all noise had been abandoned in wake of death, a sudden stillness possessed the house, and the world outside was silent.
In that second, everything changed once more.
I became who I had been, a Warrior. I felt my eyes slant down, growing hard and cold like two pieces of unbreakable stone. My lips pursed in fealty to the Code I was bound to.
I pledge my allegiance to the Order, the one and only truth.
I vow my life to thee, over sky above and ground below.
To kill, to die, or to bleed, my eyes only see one Order.
My heart dropped.
Calum’s eyes found mine, and deep down I knew what he was seeing, knew why his eyes looked so sad.
But I needed to be this person now.
Calum nodded as if he understood. “I’m ready.”
“Let’s go.” I didn’t know any other way to survive. “I don’t hear anything. It sounds like they’ve moved out of the cave.”
I stepped quietly toward the door and Calum followed.
“On the count of three,” I said.
Calum nodded, his eyes locked on the door.
“One,” I whispered, grabbing the handle.
I held up my fingers. Two.
My heart raced.
Three.
I turned the handle and we burst out into the cave.
Silence.
Emptiness.
Nothing.
The entire cave seemed to be void of life; the sun must have risen, casting the Orieno away.
Then, “Calum.”
I didn’t try to hide my voice, and in this deserted place it rang like a hundred tiny, broken bells echoing off the walls.
He asked, “What is it?”
I pointed.
-Calum-
Bloody and torn, as though it had been ripped from its body by teeth, was a severed head dripping drop after drop of thick blood on Kate’s foot. Loose, red film coated the jagged neckline, strips of flesh hanging at odd angles. The eyes, a pale mossy-green, were iced over with blue-tinted death, matching sickly lips crusted dry. Lips that were opened to a scream.
Gae.
“Kate,” I started.
A voice like breaking glass cut through the silence between us. “She was the only one who cared...”
I started to speak, “Kate, I’m so sorry-”
“We can’t stay here. We have to move.” She jumped over the head and started running, her dark hair flying wildly behind her.
“Kate! Wait!” I yelled, but she had already slowed, slumped, and fell to her knees. I wasn’t sure why until I saw her face etched red with lines of tears.
I bent down and touched her shoulder, but she turned her face away.
I said, “It’s okay to cry.”
Her voice was coarse, cracked. “No, Calum. It’s not. Both Marcus and Gae are gone and I have nothing left here, but breaking down like this goes against everything I believe a Warrior should be. Against everything I want to be.”
“Crying?”
Still the tears fell freely down her face. “Yes! It’s weak. I can’t afford to feel like this right now.”
I dug my nails into her shirt so she couldn’t brush me off and said, “Don’t think for one second that you are weaker for crying. I’ve never met a stronger person than you, Kate.”
“That’s not true,” she sniffed.
I shook my head. “This person you are right now, this is who a Warrior should be. Not that girl you were before, the one that was cold as ice and afraid to show me anything. You, Kate, crying right now for someone you just lost? Someone you loved? You look like you could take on the world. Don’t you see that tears, feelings, make you stronger? Loving and losing and hating and caring: Feelings give you reason to fight. They destroy you and build you up again. They can kill you and then give you life. That’s not weakness, Kate. It’s strength.”
She turned to me, violet to blue, and the tiny freckles on her face made me think of Orion, of the sky. Of possibilities.
“Calum?” she asked.
“Kate?”
“Thank you.” Her lips curved in a crimson smile, and then down against before it stuck. “I don’t believe you, but thanks.”
“You’re welcome,” I said. “I don’t really believe you either.”
Her forehead creased. “Believe me about what?”
“People say we hide things in the most obvious places when we don’t want anyone to find them. And with you, you’ve hidden a secret where no one has looked in a long time.”
Her voice broke. “Where?”
I touched one finger to her cheek. “Your eyes. When I look in them it’s like I know exactly how you feel. And right now I know you’re stronger than you think. Your eyes tell the truth, Kate. They are your strength even when you cry.” I brushed my finger down the golden lines of her face, rested it on her chin, and tilted her face up toward mine so all I saw was violet.
<
br /> And it was though time had stopped-
as though there was no river rushing around us-
no quiet water brushing against the bank of the lake-
just her and me and one hopeful moment free from time.
My heart beat like a drum inside my chest, pounding and pleading to run rampant against it all. Cheeks on fire, I closed my eyes and my lips moved down and close and then-
quiet, softer than a breath. “Calum. I can’t.”
My eyes opened and I saw a sad smile.
“Not now,” Kate said. “Not like this, when there’s so much death around us and I have nothing.”
“You have me. Don’t you see that?”
“Not yet.” She shook her head, turned, looked straight into my eyes, and said, “Not like this.”
Again, before I could question it, her face became a canvas of unbreakable stone.
My lips burned, but still I clung to hope.
We ran.
“Wait. Where’s Gae’s body?” Kate said, stopping suddenly. “We have to find it!”
I looked around and, when I found it crumpled in a pile a few feet away spurting red into the air, my heart stopped.
There, scrawled beside Gae’s twitching, fingerless body, were liquid words written in blood.
One, two, I’m coming for you.
“Calum.”
Cold dread slit my throat and dripped down my chest.
The Bloodletter.
Dad.
“Calum?”
Those bloody words stuck in my throat, choking me as if the entire song was scratched from my mouth down to my stomach.
“You were right,” I choked. “My Dad has to be working with the Orieno.”
Her hand reached toward me, but she pulled it back before her fingers could brush my arm.
“Which means we really need to get out of here, Calum. If the Bloodletter is here along with Morphis, we don’t stand a chance if they catch us.”
