Chapter Fourteen
Erica was hurt and disappointed, but she couldn’t be mad at Morgan, and that was super annoying. From the beginning he’d been honest about his doubts, but she’d fallen in love with him anyway. Love. Four letters italicized. Capital L. In a very short time she’d realized he was a forever-after kind of guy and he cared about her, too. She could tell in everything he did. Especially his kisses. She’d hoped he would change his mind about having kids. Being a father. Being a father to her kid. But last night hope died.
When he felt her baby move, the look on his face had told her everything she needed to know. The man wanted no part in her child’s life. That meant Morgan could have no part in hers either.
The tears started again and she was exasperated with herself. She couldn’t believe that, after crying most of the night, there could still be any left.
Unable to sleep, she’d gotten up early this morning and showered. Did her hair and put on a little makeup. It was her plan to act as if nothing was wrong. Her family had warned her about Morgan. Her mother, father and Gabe had been afraid he wanted something from her. Ha! It was just the opposite. He wanted nothing to do with her. Only Mel had worried about her getting hurt.
And hurt she was. When she and Peter broke up, she’d been frustrated that her plans for marriage and family had fallen apart. In the end, though, the split felt right. With Morgan there was an ache, an emptiness and a feeling that no other man could ever fill up her heart the way he did.
A tear trickled down her cheek, and impatiently she brushed it away. “Oh, for crying out loud...” Not funny.
She slid off the bed she’d made before the sun came up. If she sat there much longer, she was in real danger of dehydrating. Sooner or later she was going to have to go downstairs and put on a brave face for everyone. Best get it over with.
She took one more look in the mirror and winced at her reflection—the red, puffy eyes. Probably there wasn’t enough concealer in the world to hide the evidence of her broken heart, but she applied it anyway. Maybe no one would notice. And it was always possible no one would be there.
Apparently luck abandoned her, because only her father and Malone were missing. Her mother and Gabe were sitting at the kitchen table having coffee. The smell of cooked sausage and eggs filled the air. Not even that made her hungry.
Since her brother was here, that probably meant Mel was out of town for work. Gabe did a double take when he saw her. “You look terrible.”
“Thank you.” She glared at him, then poured herself half a cup of coffee and sat down at the table.
“Aren’t you going to have some breakfast? Malone fixed a plate for you and is keeping it warm in the oven,” her mother said.
“I’m not hungry.”
“You have to eat something, sweetie. Think about the baby.”
Everything she did was for this baby. After making the decision to use a sperm bank, she’d reconciled herself to doing the parent thing alone. But that was before Morgan. Couldn’t she feel just a little sorry for herself that things hadn’t worked out?
“I don’t feel like eating breakfast, Mama. I think the baby will be just fine.”
Gabe’s eyebrows rose as he sipped his coffee. “Someone is grumpy this morning.”
“I’m not,” she said, “But keep it up and I’m happy to show you just what grumpy looks like.”
“I had cravings when I was pregnant,” her mother said. “With Gabe it was candy and chips. Junk.”
Erica gave him a smirk. “You are what Mama ate.”
Their mother held up a hand to cut off his retort. “He’s fine, in spite of what I ate. And with you,” she said to Erica, “I wanted avocados and fresh melon.”
“Nothing sounds good.”
“How was your childbirth class last night?” Her mother met her gaze over the mug of coffee as she took a sip.
“It was good. Lots of information.” Afterward sucked. Well, not the kissing Morgan part. That was pretty perfect. So was the touching. Right up until the baby moved.
“I’m surprised the guy hasn’t backed out of this labor coach thing yet.”
Erica slowly looked up at her brother as the reality hit her. She’d been so caught up in Morgan pulling away when the baby moved, she’d forgotten about everything else. After the way she left his house last night, she wasn’t sure if he’d back out. Why wouldn’t he? And then what would she do for a coach?
Gabe’s expression went from easygoing to concerned as he studied her. “Is something wrong?”
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
“What happened?” her brother demanded. “Did he come on to you?”
If only.
She tamped down that reaction and speared her brother with a hard look. “He’s a good man, and someday you’re going to realize that. I predict that you two will be good friends.”
Her brother snorted. “Fat chance.”
“Ask anyone about him. You won’t hear a bad word.”
“Uh-huh.” Gabe shook his head.
“I don’t even know what to say to you right now. If I was ten, I’d call you a butthead. And Mama would scold me and tell me not to call you names.”
“Okay, then. That’s my cue.” He pushed back his chair and stood. “You’re crabby. That’s not calling her names, Mama. It’s an adjective. And I have to go.”
“Have a good day, Gabe.” Angela smiled at him as he walked out the door, then looked at Erica. “Your brother is right. You are in a mood. What’s going on?”
“I’m pregnant, Mama.” And the man I love can’t handle it. That’s what’s wrong.
“You know, honey, it’s completely natural for a pregnant woman to feel uncomfortable. Your body is supporting life. Your ankles are retaining enough water to float a cruise ship. Sleeping is hard because there’s no comfortable position and bedtime is usually when your little unborn angel decides to do the backstroke.”
Erica couldn’t help smiling at the exaggerated but all too accurate description. “And your point is?”
“It’s no secret we haven’t been as supportive of your pregnancy as we could have been. I wonder if you feel that if you complain about being uncomfortable, we’ll think you regret your decision. Or that we’ll think this is what you get for making your choice. We don’t.”
“But, Mama—”
Her mother held up a hand to stop her words. “I’m not finished.” She took a deep breath. “It also doesn’t mean that we’ll think you don’t love your baby. Or that we won’t love your baby. This is our first grandchild.”
A tear rolled down Erica’s cheek. “Damn hormones.”
“I remember it well.” A smile teased Angela’s lips.
“The thing is, Mama, I know you understand. But you’re a mother. I’m afraid Daddy will never be able to forgive me for doing the motherhood thing the way I have.”
“Don’t sell your father short. He understands more than you give him credit for.”
“But more than once I’ve heard him criticize technology, newfangled contraptions. If it wasn’t for science and a little bit of a miracle, I wouldn’t be having a baby. Women do it all the time and that choice is widely accepted. But I don’t know if he can get over his daughter taking that path.”
Her mother didn’t respond to that for several moments. She looked thoughtful, then seemed to come to a decision and stood. “Come with me.”
“What? Where?” Erica questioned, but stood anyway.
“There’s something you need to see. Get your jacket. It’s cold outside.”
Erica grabbed her poncho from the hook by the back door, then put it on and followed her mother outside. “Where are we going?”
“To the barn.”
“Why?”
“Because one picture is worth a thousand words.” That cryptic statement
was all she would say.
They walked to the ranch outbuildings and into the barn. Erica kept pace with her mother past the hay-filled stalls and to the tack room in a far corner of the structure where her father was working. He was down on one knee and his back was to them as he dragged a paintbrush across something. The smell of wood sealer was faint in the air.
“George,” her mother said. “I think it’s time you show Erica what you’re doing.”
He stood and turned toward them. “Angela, it’s supposed to be a surprise. I asked you to keep her away while I finish this.”
“What’s going on, Daddy? What are you doing?” She moved closer until she was standing right beside him. When she saw it, her heart melted and she pressed a hand to her chest. “Oh my gosh. You made a cradle.”
“Yeah.” He set the brush on the open can beside him, then looked at her. His gaze narrowed and concern replaced his tender expression. “Are you all right? Is there something wrong with the baby?”
She laughed, although the sound came out a little like a sob, what with hormones and emotions clogging her throat. “I’m fine. So is the baby. Gabe told me flat out that I look terrible. I guess it’s unanimous.”
“I didn’t say that,” her father protested.
She moved closer to the sweet little bed suspended between two supports that allowed it to rock. “I can’t believe you made this. It’s completely wonderful.”
She recognized the grain of the wood as what she’d picked up for him that day she’d run into Morgan at the building supply store. Her father had planned this very soon after he’d learned she was pregnant.
She burst into tears and covered her face with her hands. A moment later she felt strong arms come around her.
“Don’t cry, honey. Your mama told me about how the baby came to be,” he said gently.
“I guess I knew she couldn’t keep a secret from you,” she blubbered.
“No,” he confirmed. “And I don’t keep things from her. It’s just how we are.”
“It’s a good way.” She looked up at him. “Please try to understand why I had to have a baby this way, Daddy. I know it’s not what you pictured for me, but in time I hope you’ll be okay with my decision and with me.”
“What?” He took her arms and held her away as he stared at her. There was shock on his face as he met her gaze. “How could you even think that? You’re my daughter. My flesh and blood. And your child is, too. I love you. Nothing can change that. And I will love him—”
“Or her.” His wife smiled at him.
“Right.” He grinned. “I’m looking forward to holding this child. Being a grandfather. Don’t you ever doubt that for a second.”
“I won’t. And thank you. For the cradle, too. I love it. And I love you.”
She was sad that Morgan would never see this sweet little bed. When she put the baby down to sleep, she would remember her own father’s love and be sorry that Morgan would never know what a good father he’d be. She would think of him and regret that he wasn’t with her when they could have made a family together, something real and satisfying and wonderful.
Then she looked at her own amazing father and her mother. “Because of how I chose to conceive my child, there’s no father in the picture. But he or she will have you guys. And Uncle Gabe and Aunt Mel. We’re family. The baby will always be a part of my life and yours. Not like Gramps’s daughter. I can’t even imagine how he felt not just without support, but pressured to give his child away. This baby is loved and wanted.”
Erica held out her arms and drew her mother and father into a group hug. She really did have so much to be grateful for and felt selfish for wishing she could have Morgan, too.
* * *
Erica had spent the morning with her brother and the two of them went to see Gramps. It was becoming their habit to go together. And her secret was out. The whole family knew how the baby had been conceived and assured her of their support. That was a great weight lifted from her. She needed that, because what happened with Morgan still hurt a lot.
He kept calling her cell, but she let it go to voice mail. She didn’t think there was anything left to say. She would never forget the expression on his face when the baby moved, and it made her sad. The outing this morning helped a little to take her mind off what might have been.
She’d had lunch with her brother, and now she was taking her afternoon walk. Exercise was important, even near the end of her pregnancy when all she wanted to do was sit and feel like a slug. Gabe insisted on keeping her company, and now they were moving past the barn, heading for the corral and the path beyond it.
“How did you think Gramps was today?” she asked.
“Seemed about the same to me. Why?” He slid his hands into the pockets of his down vest.
“I don’t know. It just seemed like there was a spark of something in his eyes. And when I put his hand on my belly and the baby moved, I think he might have smiled.”
Gabe’s expression was sad as he shook his head. “That’s just wishful thinking, Erica. It would be great if he was still in there somewhere, but I’m not hopeful.”
“Maybe if we could find his daughter...”
“To do that we need a break. Some piece of information that would send us in the right direction.” He met her gaze for a moment. “If Malone could just remember the name Gramps said when he was talking about the prettiest little girl in the world...”
“I know,” she agreed. “It’s human nature to gloss over things. If we knew how important a piece of information would be later, we’d pay more attention.”
“Yeah.” They strolled along the white fence where a couple of the horses were hanging around. “I’ve been meaning to ask. Have you heard anything from your attorney about the Barron Enterprises lawsuit?”
“She called the other day to let me know she’d heard from their legal department. They received the paperwork and were reviewing it. She warned me again that the process could drag on indefinitely. So, I’m glad Jordan Taylor is going to give me a job.”
“Hmm.”
Erica glanced up at him. “What?”
“He doesn’t exactly have a reputation as a guy with a soft heart.”
“I’ve been gone for a lot of years so I don’t know much about him lately. But he’s always been straight with me.”
“Okay.” Gabe’s tone had a healthy dose of skepticism. “Then I hope he keeps his word and hires you.”
“I’ve already filled out the employee paperwork. And I have a tentative start date.” Before she could say more, her cell phone vibrated in her pocket. She fished it out and looked at the caller ID. Speaking of the devil, she thought, and she didn’t mean Jordan. She stopped walking and said to her brother, “I have to take this.” When Gabe nodded, she hit the green Accept button on the screen. “Peter. Why are you calling me?”
“How are you, Erica?”
The familiar deep voice used to be one that made her happy when she heard it. Not now. “I’m fine. What do you want? My attorney advised me not to speak to anyone from Barron.”
“I’m just asking for a few minutes of your time,” he said.
Erica noted that her brother’s frown deepened. He shook his head slightly but she was curious enough not to hang up. “Okay.”
“First of all I want to apologize for my father. He’s not used to employees pushing back, and he lost his temper. Firing you was a knee-jerk reaction.”
“Your father is a jackass.” She saw Gabe grin and give her a thumb-up. “Feel free to tell him I said that.”
“He has his moments.” Peter cleared his throat. “The thing is, when someone’s employment is terminated, there’s a procedure and legal is involved. He didn’t consult with the company attorneys when he took that action with you.”
“So, you’re saying that I have grounds for a lawsuit? Since preg
nant women are part of a protected class.” She wasn’t really asking.
And Peter didn’t directly respond to the question. “Barron Enterprises is putting together a generous severance package for you.”
“A severance package,” she repeated for Gabe’s benefit. His eyes widened.
“Yes. I would consider it a favor if you would seriously contemplate accepting it.”
“And dropping the lawsuit would be a condition.” Again she wasn’t asking.
“I won’t deny that we would like to avoid any negative publicity.” That was his lawyer voice.
“I’m sure you would.” That was her “you’re not going to push me around” voice.
“It’s not just that, Erica.” There was a sigh on the other end of the line. “I personally want to make sure you’re taken care of.”
“Really?” The sarcasm in that single word was laced with a good deal of anger. “Funny how it took filing a lawsuit to bring out your sensitive and caring side.”
“You’re not going to make this easy, are you?”
“Is there some reason I should?”
If he responded, she didn’t hear, what with the blood pounding in her ears. She was shaking with anger. No matter how much she told herself it wasn’t good for the baby, she couldn’t suppress the feeling. In his father’s office that day, her life had been thrown into chaos.
It was all about this man’s new, pregnant wife, who didn’t want to see Erica every day and be reminded that she’d dated her husband first. No one seemed to care that Erica was pregnant, too. She’d had a viable plan and it would have worked. But his father’s power trip put her in a position of extreme stress wondering how she was going to support not just herself, but the baby she was carrying.
Finally she calmed down enough to say, “There’s no way in hell I’m going to make this easy for you.”
“Okay. We deserve that.” There was silence for a moment. “Erica, I don’t expect you to believe this, but I’m sorry things didn’t work out between the two of us. That’s my fault,” he added quickly. “But I do care about you. And I truly do want to make sure you’re going to be okay.”
The Cowboy's Promise Page 18
