Our baby.
“No stress.” I kiss her gently and look her straight in the eye, “but you'd tell me if you are, right?”
“Yeah, I promise. I cut my mom out of my heart months ago. Now I just need to shut her off in my brain. Doesn’t mean she won’t pop up from time to time, but I’m not going to let what she’s done cause me tears or pain. You’re right, she’s not worth it.”
I really wish I could serve the bitch on a platter.
My mother seems to be trying, but I’m not ready to talk to her yet. She texts me all the time telling me to have a great show or that she loves me, but I would never forgive myself if I let my mom get back in and it ends up being some bigger plan for later.
This time around, for sure, it’s me and Vi, against the world. Hopefully with a couple extra little people in our arms.
“I really am alright, Coop. I’ve been waiting to tell her off since it happened. Now that I did it’s like the weight of the world is off my shoulders. If anything, through all of this I learned a valuable lesson.”
“What’s that?”
“Our children are going to be free to love whoever they want. Make their own mistakes. Let them enjoy their lives, and be whoever they want to be, but most of all we need to talk to them. Listen to them. I refuse to be like my mother.”
“Well, when it comes to our daughter, I’m taking after your dad.” I laugh and repeat back one of the many threats her dad had used on me, “Reid. If you ever hurt my daughter, I’ll hunt you down with whatever weapon I have and you’ll wish you never lived.’”
“Of course you will.” She presses her lips to my dimple. “You know what I just realized?” she hums.
“What’s that?”
She gives me a bright smile. “Today is the first day we met all those years ago. The day sits in my mind forever, but it didn’t click ‘till now. It was our true beginning and now we’re starting another chapter on the same day. How freakin’ odd is that?”
“That is freakin’ odd.” I teasingly mock her because she never just uses the word fuck, well unless she’s super pissed. I give her back an equally bright smile. “Meant to be…” my words drift off.
October fifth: who would’ve known the day I saved her life, we’d also make new life years later? Something you think only happens in movies, is playing out in real life.
Taking her with me again, I lie back on the bed and cuddle her in my arms. I brush her hair back with one hand and the other covers her belly. “We should probably get you in to see someone soon for the baby.”
“For what?” Her head shoots up, her eyes widen with a worry which is washing away the dark look she had moments ago.
“Just to confirm and find out our next steps. We’ll have to get you some prenatal vitamins and figure out how many times you have to see a doctor, you know to plan it around being on the road. Also, if we need to do anything when we go overseas. Shots and stuff.”
Once Violet told me she was ready to start trying, I’d lived in a sea of Google searches and baby books. Most of the shit scared the crap at me. There’s so much that can go wrong, and I’m trying to learn everything I can to be prepared.
Instead, it’s freaking me out.
“Oh...yeah.” Her head falls back on my shoulder. “Good point. I want to do everything right.”
“When do you think we should tell people?”
“Um, when we know for sure. Also, I think I heard after fourteen weeks is the best time...you know. We’ll see though because I can’t tell you why, but I have a good feeling about this baby.” Her hand covers mine on her stomach. She smiles, a smile I’ve genuinely never seen as bright as when it came to talking about having kids. “I expected when we got a positive result I would be freaking out. I am a little. The worry has been trying to seep in for hours and I’m sure it will once in a while. Despite everything, it feels right.”
I’m going to be on my knees every night, praying nothing goes wrong and we have this baby.
“Our Angel, I think, will make sure of it.” She pauses, snuggling in closer to me. I press my lips to her forehead and when I glance at her she’s grinning, looking peacefully in thought.
Then out of the blue, she starts to giggle.
I shake my head at her sudden change of mood. I wonder if I have to worry about these mood swings already. “What is it, random girl?”
“I was just thinking, but we might have to duct tape Brody’s mouth. It wouldn’t surprise me if the whole crew knows by now. Especially, if he’s taking shots. Actually, we might have to tell Alexa and Julie, because I doubt he’ll be able to keep it from Alexa.”
“I’m sure Brody will keep his mouth shut. I made sure he will,” I say nonchalantly and kiss the top of her head.
“What did you do to him now?”
“I haven’t done anything to him.” Vi playfully glares at me, telling me, ‘yeah right’. I dramatically blow out a breath of air. “Fine. I told him I would chili pepper his Toilet Paper and jizz in his shampoo then put the aftermath on YouTube. No biggie.”
She shakes her head, rolling her eyes to the ceiling. “God, who needs kids when I already have two.”
I laugh at her annoyance. “To have someone on your side against us?”
“Yeah right. Then I better keep them away from you two then.”
“I’ll behave. I mean, around our child. Don’t worry.” I lie, knowing I’ll just be glad to have an extra hand to teach my tricks to when they get older.
“Uh-huh. I don’t believe you.” Violet rolls herself on top of me, straddling my hips. “But it’s okay because I have a few tricks up my sleeve for when you misbehave.” Her fingers pull roughly on my hair before she sinks herself down on my waiting shaft.
Everything else around us is forgotten for now.
October 12th, 2006
Cooper
M y phone buzzes and dances on the table while Violet, Brody, and I dig into our bowls of Cap'n Crunch. Brody had kept my childhood favorite hoarded for himself, only for Vi to find it while searching for any type of food she could stomach. Violet suddenly can't stand the smell of eggs, or anything lately, so we're eating the old favorite I haven’t had since I was a kid.
“You should answer it,” Violet says pointing her silver spoon at my phone.
“Why?” I shrug, not interested in talking to the person on the other end. The buzzing stops and a few seconds later it buzzes once more, telling me I have a voicemail.
“Because you should. She's your mother and she's trying. I don't expect you to hug it out or forgive her right away, but I know you want to hear what she has to say. I’d do almost anything to hear my mother utter the words, ‘I'm sorry’, even if I tell her to fuck off after.” She shrugs and circles her spoon around in her bowl.
I remain silent and stuff a large spoonful of cereal in my mouth. As I chew I stare at the phone, contemplating my next move. Part of me does want to reach out to her, another part of me is screaming it's a trap.
“I'll be the first to say what she did was fucked up,” Brody pipes in, mid-bite, with a red cereal berry and milk dripping off his spoon. “But she knows you and jellybean here might be carrying an actual jellybean now, so she's desperate to make things right. Can’t blame her.” He shoves the spoon in his mouth, completing his comment.
“Did you tell her?” My eyes narrow at my brother, unable to keep the sudden irritation out of voice.
Brody glares at me. “No,” he snaps, his mouth still full as he talks. “Did you forget about the tabloids, dude?”
“Close your mouth,” I cover his mouth to avoid particles of red and blue hitting my face. “I don’t want to wear your breakfast.”
He knocks my hand away and I watch him swallow. “Just talk to her because she's driving me crazy trying to get information out of me about you two and asking how you're doing.” He pauses, scooping more cereal on his spoon. “Listen. It's been three months now, she’s sorry, you're having a baby, and frankly, I have a perma
nent headache because of it.”
“I'll think about it,” I grumble and stand up. Picking up my bowl I throw it in the sink, willing this conversation to end. “Now, can we talk about something else?”
“We can talk about how you're going to rinse that bowl out before I cut you,” Violet jabs her finger in my direction, narrowing her eyes at me.
The thing is, she probably will if I don't. Unrinsed dishes drive her crazy.
Note to self: Make sure to stay on her good side with her pet peeves when the pregnancy hormones fully kick in.
“Yes, ma’am.” I salute her, as a soggy piece of Cap’n Crunch hits me right between the eyes. Her and Brody are laughing at her direct hit.
Abandoning the bowl in the sink, I march the four steps to my wife and grab her hand, pulling her from her seat.
Her eyes dance in amusement while my hand runs down her face, down her arm, and rest on her ass before I lay a nice hard smack to it. She yelps with a giggle.
“Maybe I should give you your birthday spanking early this year.” I grab a handful of her luscious ass and yank her to my chest.
“Can’t I just have extra?” Her eyes flutter as her tongue darts out of her mouth wetting her lips.
“Oh, come on. I'm right here and I'm eating,” Brody groans. “I don’t need morning sickness either.”
“Shut up,” I flip him off and he flips me off right back.
“Will you two behave for one minute?” She grabs my finger and folds it down, tucking it back into my fist. “Now, tell me what we're doing for my birthday?” She gives me her most radiant smile.
“I’m not telling you.”
“Please.” She folds her hands together, giving me large doe eyes, and a cute pout with her bottom lip puffed out.
I laugh, and push her lip back in, shaking my head. “Not happening, you’ll just have to be surprised.”
We're going to be in Seattle on her birthday, so I made plans to take her to the space needle for lunch and then to the Ferris wheel. I do have a show that night, but afterward, we're going to a club I rented out, and Alexa and Julie will be joining us as well.
What I really should do is return the favor of throwing a cake in her face on stage like she did on my birthday two months ago, but I want to live.
“I think I have ways of making you talk…” She purrs and runs her hands up my chest, her lips making contact with the bottom of my chin.
“Seriously you guys, I’m right here. And don’t even think of running off, we have to get to the radio station for your interview in twenty minutes.” Brody stands up and moves to throw his bowl in the sink.
He doesn’t wash it out and walks toward his bunk.
“Brody Daniel Reid,” Violet snarls, leaving my arms, to chase after him, “I’m going to hurt you.”
“Good,” he retorts, ducking for cover as a pillow comes at his head. “My ears and my eyes will appreciate it.”
And she tells us we’re the ones who act like children. But now I’m left pouting, knowing I’m not getting laid anytime soon.
With sound check finished, I head to the green room for some water and to chill before the show starts. Last I saw my wife, she was in the pit talking to one of the promoters, while Brody handled the opening act.
I think my favorite part about this is that every show’s opening act is a winner from the area's Battle of the Band's contest. Everyone should get a chance at the limelight. I mean it's how I got my start, though my mother storming on stage is what made me memorable to my record producers.
And as if she knew I was thinking about her, my phone pings, lighting up the screen with a text.
Mother:Have a good show. Love you.
As always, simple and to the point.
I have about thirty minutes ‘till the show starts and I figure if I’m ever going to do this, I might as well do it when I can quickly get her off the phone.
Finding her name, I hit the call button. It rings once before she answers, with a large amount of uncertainty in her voice. “Cooper?”
“It’s me. I thought…” I trail off and look around the empty green room, hoping it will give me an answer, “maybe I’d say hi.”
“Hi.” She sniffles, and I wonder if she’s crying about a phone call.
Though, maybe I would feel the same way if my children stopped talking to me—even if I deserved the silent treatment.
Which is never going to happen. I’ll earn my father of the year cup, every year.
It’s silent for a moment on both ends, and I realize I should say something, but she jumps the gun, taking the next step. “How are you? Don’t you have a show soon?” Her words tumble out of her mouth so fast they sound more like one long Mary Poppins word.
“I'm fine and yes, soon. I just know you've been trying to reach me and I've been…”
“Avoiding…” she answers for me. “I know, and I don't blame you. I only wanted to keep trying, to let you know I'm sorry and that I’m not giving up ‘till I show you I want you and Violet to be happy.”
My hands push through my hair, willing my mind to believe the sincerity in her voice. Violet believes she’s genuine and she hasn't done anything to show otherwise. Brody thinks she's finally returned to the mother I used to know as a kid, but does it mean I should try to forget everything that happened?
Why can't I be more like Violet and let shit go easier?
“Cooper?” She interrupts my inner battle, “listen, I don't expect your forgiveness and I'll never be able to say sorry enough, but with that being said I want to be there for you now and show you I can be the mother you always needed…” She breathes heavily through the line, just as the green room door opens.
“Hold on a sec,” I tell her and drop the phone from my ear as Violet comes barreling into the room. Her strawberry hair sways and her subtly larger boobs bounce, as she makes her way over to me. She’s all smiles as she wraps her arms around my neck, kissing my cheek.
“We have ten minutes before Fingerpunch comes on.” Her blue eyes light up with a mischievous glint and she wiggles her eyebrows. I lightly chuckle in response. She knows ten minutes isn't nearly enough time to satisfy each other.
“Yeah, and?” I ask awaiting her smartass comment.
“Thought we could you know? Maybe go on a 7-11 run to get some hot dogs and ho-hos. I'm feeling the need for some meat and cream.” Her hand runs down my chest and I shake my head at her comment.
“You've been hanging out with Brody too long.” I smirk, lifting her chin and kiss her softly on the lips. “As fun as it all sounds, I'm on the phone with my mother.”
Her gorgeous eyes widen and she steps back from me. “You could’ve told me that first.”
“Sorry. You know I don't think clearly when you're in the room.” I wink at her and she smacks me in the chest.
“Jerk. I'll see you out in ten and be nice. Oh and if she asks about—you know,” her hand circles her belly, “you can tell her if you want, but hurry, we got a show to do.”
She starts to walk away and I grab her hand, pulling her back before she can get out the door. “Stay.”
Her eyes search mine curiously and she nods. “Alright.” She cuddles into my side and I bring the phone back to my ear.
My mother is chuckling on the other end and I can’t help wonder what she thinks is so funny.
“You were saying?” I snap, and her laughter fades.
“I’m sorry, it’s just, you might be right about her hanging out with Brody too much.” I instantly soften and glance at my wife who leans on my shoulder, as she listens in on the conversation.
“It's the price I pay to have them with me. I'll reel her back in after the tour,” I jest, surprising myself by talking to her so...casually.
“Ha!” Violet remarks into my arm.
“Maybe a tab inappropriate for my ears, but refreshing to hear you two goof around. Your father and I used to be like that.”
I don't say anything as she wistfully remembers a time
where she might have been fun. But time is a wasting. I open my mouth to say something when she speaks again.
“Anyways, as I was saying before, I want to make up for not being there for you, and be what you need now. I only hope I'm not too late.”
I look down at Violet for help. She keeps telling me to let her back in, but I don’t know how to trust her again.
I've never felt more confused than I do now on what is right or wrong.
“Don't look at me,” Violet smirks. Her hand sweeps through my hair, keeping my attention on her, which tells me she really has something else to say. “Buttt...at the end of the day, she’s trying, and I for myself want it to be better and behind us. Also, think of your dad and your brothers. All this affects them too. I was lucky and no one else was affected by my mother being a witch, but think about what you will miss with them if you can't be in the same room with her.”
Glancing down at her flat belly, I know it will be easier to release my grudge because I have no doubt my brothers and my father are going to want to be around the baby all the time. Also, do I let her in for my kids’ sake too? So, they don't have any worries or questions about why their parents dislike their grandmother?
Warm hands grab my face and wet pouty lips kiss me gently on the mouth. “You heard how my mother acted the other day; she’s a person who is worth hating and cutting out. Your mom, well, I think she’s earning her second chance. One day at a time. Though, it doesn't mean I don't have my guard up,” she says pointedly and glances at the phone, making sure my mother heard her.
“You're not too late,” I mumble, still questioning my sanity, “but only because I'm trusting my wife, and if she's willing, then I guess I have to be too.”
“I should've always seen how good she was for you, and how she kept you in line. I wish I saw it before, but I see it now.” I swear I can hear her smile over the phone. “She’s also going to be a great mom for your children, Coop.”
I Found You Page 29
