by Tamie Dearen
As the live auction began, Laurie smiled and clapped, watching the Limitless coffers fill in dramatic fashion. Hopefully, no one could tell she was dying on the inside.
Evidently trying hard to make up for his misstep, Jerome bid enthusiastically on the Bach tour. But Laurie didn’t return his eager smiles as the price went higher and higher. She’d half-hoped Finn might surprise her and bid against Jerome, according to her original defective plan. But he sat quietly with his hands folded in his lap, smart practice when you don’t want a stray movement to be mistaken as a bid. When the price went over $100,000, Jerome shrugged and mouthed, “Sorry,” bowing out of the auction. The bids continued to rise between an older gentleman Laurie didn’t recognize and an anonymous bidder on the internet. At last the old man surrendered, making the price the highest of the evening, at $165,000.
The auction continued for the next hour, each item increasing in value. As the time approached for her to model the diamonds, she became increasingly more nervous, pressing her hands together in her lap and turning the ring around her finger until her skin was almost raw. Her head began to swim like it did in the airport, until Finn beckoned her close with a crooked finger and whispered in her ear, “Have you noticed that bead of sweat on top of Chuck’s head?”
“What?” The question caught her off-guard.
“Look.”
He nodded toward the auctioneer, who was sweating profusely under the bright spotlight. A large drop of sweat was suspended on a wrinkle near the top of his forehead. Unable to tear her eyes away, she watched with morbid fascination as the shiny liquid quivered on the ridge and then began a slow downward trickle. It paused on top of his eyebrow for a moment, then dropped down to his cheek and continued its trek. Finally, it reached his chin and plummeted through the air, landing in a puddle at his feet. An actual puddle!
She covered her hand with her mouth to keep a giggle inside, noting a new drop had already formed on his forehead.
Finn leaned close to her ear again. “We hire Chuck for every auction event, and he sweats like this every single time.”
Laurie knew they had paid to fly him to the fundraiser.
“Why?” she whispered back.
“Because he also volunteers at one of our teen camps.” Another drop of sweat splashed to the floor, as Finn continued, “A big heart makes up for a little sweat.”
She knew the comment was meant to help with her nerves, and part of her didn’t want it to work. But it did. And she loved him for it, even though it hurt.
Chuck announced the jewelry set, and she rose to her feet, surprised when Finn stood with her. He lifted the tux coat from her shoulders and slipped it on, before tucking her left hand in his arm. As he walked up the steps with her and across to the center of the stage, he joked about avoiding Chuck’s puddle. By the time he left her to stroll across on her own, her knees had stopped shaking.
“Tell us, Laurie,” Chuck said into the microphone, “how does it feel to wear those Avanza diamonds?”
He approached her where she stood, diamonds sparkling under the hot lights, and pointed the microphone at her mouth. Laurie gave him a genuine smile. “I feel like I’m worth a million bucks.”
Chuck’s laughter shook another drop of sweat to the stage floor and he swept his arm toward her in a grand gesture. “There you have it, gentlemen. Here’s your chance to let your lady know what she’s worth and change the lives of hundreds, maybe thousands of kids at the same time. Now what am I bid?”
He started his auctioneer chatter, so fast Laurie couldn’t understand the words. As the bidding went on, Laurie was called down to the floor level so that bidders could inspect the jewelry more closely. The price went sky high, with several internet bidders competing as well. Then the auctioneer announced, “Going once, going twice… Sold to bidder number 517 for $1,245,000!”
Amid the claps and cheers, Laurie removed the jewelry and handed it to the assistant, surprised to feel bare without it. She risked a quick glance at Finn, but he was already preparing to make the final acknowledgements to close the event, except for the music and dancing to follow. As he took the stage, achingly handsome in his tuxedo, her heart got stuck in her throat. How could she have even dreamed he would love her the way she loved him? What would a man like Finn Anderson ever see in a woman like her, other than a diligent, passionate employee? Looking back, every word and action, even that fateful kiss he’d resisted with such persistence, had the singular purpose of keeping her at a distance. To protect her. If only he’d had the guts to tell her the brutal truth, she might not have fallen for him so hard… so deep.
The next two hours she worked her tail off, discarding her blistering pumps to pad around in bare feet, hiking the hem to avoid stepping on it. She was so busy handling the payments, arranging for delivery of the auction items, and directing the cleanup efforts, she only had time for a hasty goodbye when her brother left. But she kissed his cheek and promised to call, having already forgiven his well-intentioned interference. When she finally dragged herself out, it was well past one a.m.
On her way to the elevator, she spied Finn at the front desk, bowtie loose, tux coat thrown over his shoulder. She could see his exhaustion in his posture as he propped his weight against the desk. Part of her wanted to march to the front and take over, sending him up to his room to rest. She couldn’t help worrying whether he’d done too much too soon after his hospital stay, putting his health at risk. But she reminded herself it wasn’t her job—Finn didn’t want her meddling in his private life. Why did it hurt so much to admit it?
Raw and drained, she collapsed against the back corner of the elevator, watching the numbers light up. All she could think about was surviving until the next day, so she could escape the nightmare. Finn would be flying home via private jet, and she was free to ride back on the train… a cross-country trip, three blessed days with no reminder of her pain.
Maybe when she returned to New York, she could find a new job. It wasn’t quitting—it was a fresh start. She’d learned, long ago, she couldn’t count on anyone but herself. So why was she being forced to face that lesson all over again, with almost every single relationship in her life? Only Stephanie had been a constant, faithful friend. Maybe it was a different lesson she needed to learn… one of forgiveness and letting go of expectations. Three days alone would give her plenty of time to contemplate. But would it be enough time to get over Finn?
Chapter 18
Laurie slipped away from the hotel early the next morning, avoiding any chance encounter with Finn. His first phone call came in shortly after she arrived at Union Station. But she wasn’t prepared to talk to him—mentally or emotionally—so she turned off her phone. In her master plan, she would compose a letter that night on the train, apologizing for what she now understood as intrusive actions that had put him in an awkward position. But for now, thinking about Finn tore her stomach up.
Desperate to keep her mind occupied until the six p.m. departure, she stored her suitcases and signed up for a bike tour of Los Angeles. What she thought would simply be a way to occupy her time turned out to be fun and fascinating, and included restaurant stops with the best tacos she’d ever eaten. The outing was great, except for when she was missing Finn… which was all the time. She kept thinking how much Finn would’ve loved it, since he liked every kind of outdoor sport and eating. Maybe she would add a postscript to her letter and recommend it for the next time he was in LA.
Back at Union Station, she turned her phone on to read a book when about fifty text messages showed up from Finn. She scanned the last few, which essentially said, The least you could do is let me know you’re alive. Call me!
A wave of guilt crushed her. She should’ve realized he would worry—he was a caring sort of man. Reasoning that by now he was on the plane bound for New York, she tapped out a message that would be waiting for him when he arrived.
I’m alive and well. Phone was off for a tour. Have a safe flight home.
She sat back, prepared to read a book on her phone until the train arrived, but her phone beeped with an incoming message.
Finn: What tour?
Should she ignore it? She wasn’t ready for a deep conversation. But what could it hurt to talk about the tour?
Laurie: Sightseeing and Tacos Bike Tour. It was awesome.
A few seconds later, another message came.
Finn: Can’t believe you didn’t invite me!
She smiled, forgetting for a moment how strained their relationship was.
Laurie: You snooze, you lose. I left early.
Then she realized he should be in the air right now.
Laurie: You already in NYC?
This time there was a long delay before her phone beeped again.
Finn: Problem with flight schedule. Still in LA. When does your train leave?
That was a dangerous question. She didn’t want him coming to Union Station.
Laurie: Soon
Finn: We need to talk…
Her heart rate skyrocketed. Talking was exactly what she wanted to avoid.
Laurie: Not necessary. All good.
Finn: Need to clear some things up. Call me. Please!
Thank goodness, he wasn’t there. Even via text, she could picture his face, heart-stopping blue eyes imploring, impossible to resist. How could she put him off? By making him laugh…
Laurie: Watch me running up twenty flights of stairs to avoid talking. Will email tonight.
Finn: LOL. Can I ask you one question? Hypothetical, only?
She almost typed no, but then she reconsidered. She could address his question in the email she planned to write tonight.
Laurie: One question. But may not answer right away.
Finn: You drive a hard bargain, don’t you?
Laurie chuckled, quickly responding, Surprising question. Answer is YES.
A few seconds later she got a motion emoticon, shooting himself in the foot.
Laurie: Ha ha ha ha!
Finn: That didn’t count. Real question… If you were in love with someone, how would you let them know?
Her throat felt like she’d swallowed a baseball. Why would he even ask that question? Did he want to torture her?
Laurie: Deep question. Don’t know the answer. Ask Branson.
Finn: Already asked him. Want to know his answer?
She could’ve said no and ended the conversation, but her curiosity got the better of her.
Laurie: Yes
The next message was delayed several minutes, as if he was making her wait for the answer.
Finn: Bran said he made hot tea for Steph when she was sick. Now brings her coffee every morning.
Laurie: True. Saw him do it.
She had always tried not to be jealous of her friend’s happiness. Steph certainly deserved it after all she’d been through. But sometimes, Laurie wished she could have what Steph had. What would it be like to have one person in your life who cared more about you than anyone else?
Finn: Want to know my answer?
She responded with classic evasion.
Laurie: Prefer a different subject
The next message came so fast, she knew he hadn’t waited for her response.
Finn: I would buy a special gift
She could picture Finn doing just that, though she’d never experienced it herself. He once mentioned that he spent a ridiculous amount on birthday and Christmas presents for his family.
The phone beeped again.
Finn: Your turn
Laurie: No thanks
Finn: Doesn’t matter. Already know your answer.
He didn’t know her well enough to know her answer to the question, but he sure knew how to irritate her.
Laurie: No you don’t
Finn: I do (laughing emoticon)
Laurie: Tell me
Finn: I will
Finn: Eventually…
The man was such a tease. He made her absolutely crazy.
Laurie: Don’t you have something else you should be doing?
Finn: Should be? Maybe. Want to be? No.
Why did he have to say things like that? Things that she could so easily misinterpret? Things that made her hope when she shouldn’t? As she feared, talking to Finn, even with text messages, made her want what she couldn’t have. Tears sprang to her eyes, and she swiped at them, angry that they made texting difficult.
Laurie: Phone dying. Gotta go.
She turned her cell off before he could send a response and slumped in her chair. Her body felt like someone had drained all the blood out of it. So far, she hadn’t done too well forgetting about Finn Anderson. Maybe she could try again tomorrow.
Once Laurie was in her small compartment on the train, unpacked and organized, her spirits picked up. She had three days ahead and a backlog of books downloaded on her phone. She could hide out in her roomette compartment and avoid everyone, only coming out for quick meals in the dining car. From her private window she could see the beautiful landscapes as the train whizzed across the country. The trip was perfect to recharge the introvert hidden behind her outgoing personality, in addition to helping her concentrate on anything besides Finn. At this point, even worrying about her family seemed preferable.
She slipped into the small shower room and cleaned off the day’s grime and towel-dried her curls. She pulled on a long shirt and comfy yoga pants, the same clothes she intended to sleep in, and she stepped into the hallway, where an attendant offered to make up her bed while she was at dinner. When she reached the dining car, she found an empty table behind a young couple, obviously in love. They sat on the same side of the table, their heads close together, murmuring softly to one another as they ate, occasional laughter ringing out. Laurie sat down with her back to the couple. Who wants to look at that?
She ordered her dinner and started reading her book, oblivious to the bustling around her. Until she heard a familiar voice and from the corner of her eye saw a man with blond hair and a close-cropped beard. Finn!
With a gasp, she turned to her left, her hand already pressing against her chest to calm her racing heart. The surprised eyes that met hers were brown, not blue. “Sorry,” the stranger murmured, before turning to the small blond-haired child standing on the seat beside him. “Grayson, don’t make me say it again. Sit down on your bottom.”
Feeling like an idiot, she forced her attention back to her sweet romance story, but a few pages in, she realized she was getting depressed. Switching to a mystery suspense novel, she began to read, but struggled to concentrate. Appetite gone, she picked at her dinner, which might’ve been tasty any other time. She returned to her roomette, where her enticing bed reminded her how little sleep she’d had the night before. No wonder she was so emotional. She grabbed her toiletry bag and padded down to the bathroom to brush her teeth.
No sooner had she returned and locked her door for the night, when someone knocked.
“Excuse me,” said a muffled male voice through the door. “I have an evening snack for you, complimentary.”
“No thanks,” she replied. “I’ve already brushed my teeth.”
She heard murmuring outside. There must be two attendants.
“Ma’am, it’s chocolate pecan pie. I’ll have to throw it away if you don’t eat it.”
Her mouth watered at the thought, but she really didn’t want to have to brush her teeth again.
“You can give my piece to someone else, then.”
More murmuring voices.
“If you don’t accept this room service, I could lose my job.”
“Oh for goodness’ sake! I’ll take it, but I don’t have change for a tip.”
The relief was obvious in his tone. “That’s okay. I don’t need a tip.”
She opened the door and a twentyish man with short brown hair handed her a large plate with a silver lid. She thanked him and set the plate on her bed while she relocked the door. Turning to face the plate, she stared at it as if it were the enemy. Maybe this co
uld be the day she turned over a new leaf. If she could resist this piece of chocolate pecan pie, it would show she had willpower. She could change to a healthy diet and exercise every day. And these new goals would give her something to work toward.
From this day on, I’m a new person. I’ll get a new job and lose weight and get in shape. And some day, when I run into Finn Anderson again, he’ll wish he hadn’t turned me down.
Without looking under the lid, she shoved the entire plate on the floor under her bed. Pulling her covers back, she climbed onto the crisp sheets and pulled the blanket up to her neck.
A knock sounded on her door. The room service man’s voice again. “Ma’am?” Another knock. “Ma’am.”
“What do you need now?” she called, refusing to get out of her bed.
“Have you eaten your pie yet?”
“No. I’m saving it for tomorrow,” she snapped. “Thank you. Good night.”
Another set of knocks. “Ma’am? If you wouldn’t mind eating it now, I need to take the plate back.”
Frustrated, Laurie threw back the covers and crawled out of bed. She snatched the pie from the floor and stepped over to her tiny trashcan. Before she could change her mind, she lifted the silver lid and dumped the pie into the trash.
Only it wasn’t a piece of pie… it was a pile of diamonds.
The plate slipped from her fingers and crashed to the floor. She didn’t even realize she was screaming until loud knocking and excited shouts broke through her consciousness.
Knock. Knock. Knock. “Open the door.” Knock. Knock. Knock. Knock. “Open the door.”
With trembling fingers she opened the lock, wondering if she would be accused of stealing the diamonds. Strong arms wrapped around her, stroking her hair.
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I wanted it to be a fun surprise.”
Somehow, Finn was there, holding her in his arms. Laurie knew she was in a dream. But it was a nice dream, so she didn’t want to wake up. She kept her eyes closed and let herself enjoy the sensation. Never mind that it wasn’t real. Her dream even smelled like Finn—his heady, intoxicating scent. She burrowed against him, humming in her sleep.
