“You son of a bitch!” She shouted.
“What the fuck did you do?” Bones asked from behind me.
“Beats the fuck out of me,” I hissed, reaching for my gun, because so help me God I was not in the mood for this woman.
“Ma,” shouted Anthony and Lauren in unison.
Anthony was quick on his feet, wrapping his arms around his mother and holding her back before she could crack me with the stick.
“What the hell is your problem?” he shouted at her.
“Let me go! This son of a bitch took advantage of your sister!”
“Oh you have got to be shitting me,” I shouted.
“What do you mean he took advantage of Lauren?”
“Lauren’s right here you know!” Kitten argued. “And he didn’t take advantage of me!”
“Oh no? Tell that to the baby you’re carrying when he asks where his dad is,” Maria shouted back.
Wait.
What?
“MOM,” Lauren screamed, throwing her hands up in the air frustrated as she turned around and her eyes found mine.
“Shit. Duck!” Bones warned.
Anthony released his hold on crazy, pushing her to the side as he reared his fist back and punched me square in the jaw.
“You son of a bitch,” he growled, flexing his fingers, debating if he should ball them into a fist and give me another shot to the jaw.
“I told you to duck,” Bones shouted, moving around me to stand between me and Anthony.
“Anthony,” Lauren screeched, stepping in front of me.
He must’ve clipped my lip too because it was bleeding.
“Move,” I hissed.
“No,” she challenged, as she glared at her brother. “This isn’t any of your business. I don’t need you punching him in the face and I don’t need you…” she pointed to her mother, “…spreading my business around for the whole world to know!”
“I fucking warned you, Lauren!” Anthony ground out before turning his eyes back to mine.
“And I told you to stay the fuck away from her!” He added.
I blew out a ragged breath, losing my patience and ten seconds away from pummeling both Maria and Anthony.
I hadn’t even had a chance to process what the fuck was going on.
And wasting time with these two clowns was pissing me off.
“You’re in my fucking house now,” I said, diverting my eyes between Maria and Anthony.
“My fucking rules. Now both of you sit the fuck down and let me handle my shit!”
My shit.
My shit being Lauren was knocked up.
“Oh, this I’ve got to see,” Maria snarled.
“Shut up,” Kitten and I yelled, causing us to look at one another. Her big blue eyes stared at me and shit, they were full of tears.
Now what?
I had no fucking clue.
“Shit, Riggs. You got a bun in the oven?” Wolf asked.
“She got your kid, she got you for eighteen years,” Pipe added.
“Kanye West, Pipe? Really we’re going to rap now?” Bones questioned.
“Fuck off,” I growled, grabbing Lauren’s hand. “Upstairs, now,” I seethed.
She snatched her hand free, crossed her arms over her chest and stalked toward the stairs.
Like she had a right to be mad.
Like she was the one who just robbed a quarter of a million dollars’ worth of drugs from a bunch of crazy Chinese people.
Like she had to breathe for her brother to save his life.
Like she walked a mile in my fucking shoes.
Like she came home with blood on her hands to be told, “Hey so there’s this baby that exists and its half yours.”
What the fuck?
Me a dad?
Get the hell out of here.
I followed her into my room and closed the door behind us. I placed my hands on my hips, standing as still as a statue, trying to figure the right thing to say.
This fucking blows, didn’t seem fitting.
And I didn’t want to upset her any more than she already was because…she was fucking pregnant.
Jesus.
“The veins in your forehead are bulging a bit,” she said observantly. “I’m sorry, that wasn’t how I planned for you to find out. I tried telling you before you left but…well you were there, you know how you stormed out of here,” she added bitterly, and taking a seat on the foot of my bed.
“I had a momentary lapse of weakness and thought before you went out guns blazing like a cowboy you should know that you’ve got a kid on the way,” she started, biting the inside of her cheek before she continued to ramble on. “I don’t mean that having a kid should stop you from being who you are but, well, fuck! I don’t even know what I mean anymore,” she dropped her head into her hands.
I stared at her speechless, not realizing at first that I was pacing my small room. She dropped her hands and lifted her eyes to mine.
“I don’t expect anything from you,” she whispered.
I walked toward her and pressed my index finger to her mouth, silencing her. I felt more out of control in that single moment than I had in the last two days. Her eyes widened as I took a retreating step backward and she opened her mouth to say something else but I shot her down with a curt shake of my head.
Silence.
It was golden.
Especially when you were having a mental breakdown of sorts.
I peeled the bulletproof vest off and dropped it to the floor, kicking off my boots and disarming myself. I made sure the safety was on because clearly I was an advocate of safety.
What a fucking joke.
How’s that for impending fatherhood?
I sighed, taking a seat next to Lauren and stared at the wall.
“How long have you known?” I asked, robotically.
“About two weeks,” she replied.
I’m sure there was a protocol for this shit, like a list of questions I should’ve asked but the ones that came to me, sounded foul even inside my head. I wasn’t going to ask her if she was sure the kid was mine. I may not know her very well but I knew her well enough to know what we had, that one night, was nothing but a detour.
Me and my big fucking mouth.
“I’m guessing you want to keep it,” I said, grabbing my knees as I turned my head to face her.
She looked exhausted, drained, but still so fucking pretty.
She bit her lip and nodded.
“I’m keeping our baby,” she insisted.
Our baby.
Wow.
That would take a whole lot of getting used to.
“Riggs,” she started and again I lifted my finger to her lips.
“We’ll figure it out, but I gotta tell you, Kitten. My brain ain’t worth shit right now. I’m exhausted and honestly I’m not a hundred percent sure I’ve processed any of this.”
“I understand,” she said against my finger.
“You can’t do it, can you?” I said, smiling half-heartedly.
“Can’t do what?”
“Be quiet,” I said, winking at her.
“Sorry,” she whispered, breaking eye contact by turning her head.
I leaned over, cupped her chin and forced her to look at me.
“Can we figure it out tomorrow?”
“Yeah,” she muttered.
“Kitten,” I said hoarsely.
“Please don’t call me that,” she whispered, turning away again so I wouldn’t see the tears in her eyes.
“You should probably get used to it if we’re going to do this parenting thing. You will always be my Kitten,” I said, taking her hand and tugging her against me. “Lay down with me?”
She lifted her head from my chest and looked up at me, blinking—her eyes full of unshed tears. Neither of us said another word as I pulled her onto the bed and wrapped my arms around her.
I closed my eyes, listened as she sniffled against my chest, and because I was a selfish fuck,
I cuddled my baby mama.
Talk about a mind-fuck.
Chapter Eighteen
Here we go again.
I removed Riggs’ arms from me and hurried out of bed, making a beeline for the bathroom. Routinely, I dropped to my knees and pulled my hair back bowing my head surrendering to the nausea. I’m not sure how long this vomiting business can go on. At some point doesn’t the baby need for me to sustain food to grow?
After the initial shock wore off, and I told the women I was pregnant, they tried to make me feel better and told me I was glowing.
I was most definitely not glowing.
But hey, thanks for trying guys.
I don’t know what made me blurt the truth to my mother. I’m going to blame all my craziness on the hormones and pray that after I give birth they find some sort of chemical imbalance so I can continue the charade.
To say my mother went ballistic would put things mildly. Very mildly. She lost her shit, and rightfully so; I suppose. She hates Riggs.
But she didn’t have to do what she did.
It wasn’t her place to tell him.
Yet, as pissed as I am, I’d be lying if I didn’t say I was relieved too.
I decided there was no right way to tell a man you slept with once, who blew you off and crippled your self-esteem, that you were having his child.
Now everything was out in the open and he had a choice to make.
I prepared myself for the blow, knowing very well he doesn’t want a kid but he didn’t outright say that.
Not yet anyway.
He didn’t say much of anything.
I wonder if he even remembers. Oh, God, please let him remember. I don’t think I could go through that again.
He knocked on the door as I flushed the toilet.
“I’ll be right out,” I called, making my way to the sink and rinsing my face. The cold water instantly made me feel better, but still, I wished I had a toothbrush. I grabbed the bottle of mouthwash he kept on the ledge of the sink and gurgled until the foul taste left my mouth.
I opened the door and spotted Riggs sitting on the foot of the bed, yawning as he ran his fingers through his hair.
“Hi,” I said, leaning against the frame of the door, not really sure where we go from here.
“You okay?” he asked, tipping his head toward the bathroom.
“Yeah, I’m fine. I’ve gotten used to it,” I replied, watching his face for some sort of reaction, not even sure what it was I was expecting.
He nodded, his eyes dipping down to my stomach momentarily before looking away.
This was going awesome!
“I should go,” I stammered, pushing off the frame of the door.
“Go where?”
“Home, my brother’s house. I’m assuming this whole lockdown thing is over with, right? I’m a free bird so I’ll just fly away and get out of your hair,” I rambled.
“Stop it, Lauren,” he said, causing me to look at him.
“You’re pregnant for Christ sake and you didn’t get that way by yourself,” he hissed, lifting his eyes to mine. “C’mere,” he ordered, patting the empty space on the bed beside him.
I licked my lips and reluctantly walked toward him, sitting down next to him.
“You’ve had a helluva lot more time to digest this whole thing, so I’m assuming you being you, you have a plan?” he asked, reaching behind him and leaning over the bed to grab my glasses from the night stand. He sat up straight and pushed the glasses onto my nose. “Better,” he said. “Now go on, tell me, what’s the plan, Kitten?”
I felt stupid because he was right, I should’ve had a plan. But since every plan I make seems to go up in smoke, I decided to be reckless and just take it day by day. I say reckless because taking it day by day shouldn’t be an option when you’re responsible for another life.
“I don’t have a plan, Riggs,” I mumbled.
“Okay, no plan, then,” he said, running his fingers through his hair which I decided was something he did when he was nervous. “You moved back here, right?”
“Yes, I’m staying with Anthony and Adrianna until my mother finds an apartment for us,” I frowned. “That’s temporary. I’m not planning on raising the baby with my mother,” I added.
“You just said you don’t have a plan,” he pointed out.
“Well that much I know,” I snapped. “I will not dump this on my mother’s shoulders. She raised her kids and did it by herself. She did her time,” I said defensively.
“Kitten, calm down,” he said. “I don’t want your mother raising the kid either,” he declared. “And I don’t want you not knowing where you will live. I have an apartment, it’s got two bedrooms and not a stitch of furniture in it but we’ll change that.”
I leaned back and stared as if someone was performing an exorcism on him.
“Are you feeling okay?” I asked, because the Riggs I know wouldn’t be instilling hope in a pretty hopeless situation. Yet, in his own way that’s exactly what he was doing. Neither of us had a clue where we went from here, but he was taking the initiative and that was more than I ever imagined he’d do.
“I’m not even sure why I have the apartment, I sleep here every night, but it’s there, and it’s yours,” he paused. “Lauren, I’m not going to lie to you, I have no idea how to be a dad and up until last night I never even thought about becoming one. But this kid, he’s got other plans for me. So I’ll try. I’ll give you the best I got and hope it’s enough,” he promised. “And whatever it is you need, you tell me and I’ll make sure you have it,” he added.
I stared at him for a moment, unsure how to feel, desperately wanting to believe in him, to believe that Kitten and Tiger could do this. We weren’t going to become some instant family and I could kiss my dreams of my perfect husband goodbye but we could be a team.
“I call the baby Pea,” I shared.
He narrowed his eyes in confusion.
“Pea,” he tested it out. “Okay,” he agreed. “So you and Pea, you will move into the apartment, right?”
I let out a giggle because his patience was tattering and he was still trying to do the right thing. I stopped laughing and looked at him, seriously, eye to eye.
“If you’re sure, I want you to be sure because I meant it when I said I will do this by myself. I know you didn’t sign up for this—”
“Neither did you…” he interrupted. “...I’m sure,” he continued. “I’ve got some shit to do for the club. Blackie’s in the hospital and I need to get there but when I get back I’ll take you to see the place,” he said, rising to his feet.
“Okay,” I agreed.
“So we’re good?”
“We’re good,” I confirmed.
“All right, I’m going to head out. Do you need anything else?”
“No, I’m fine,” I forced a smile as he looked like he was ready to flee. “Go ahead, do your thing,” I encouraged.
He shoved his boots on, not bothering with the laces and grabbed his gun from the dresser, fitting it into the waistband of his jeans before he slipped his arms into his leather jacket and headed toward the door. His hand paused on the doorknob and he glanced over his shoulder at me.
I waved from the bed.
He nodded.
And then he hurried out the door.
Awkward.
Shit! Shit! Shit!
I ran the fuck away from that room, from Kitten and from Pea.
Pea.
I had a Pea.
The door across from mine opened and Bones stood in the doorway.
“Was wondering when you were going come out of hiding,” he said, smugly. “You all right bro, you’re looking a little green,” he observed.
I pushed him aside and brushed past him as I walked into his room.
“Man, I’m fucked,” I stressed.
He stuck his head into the hallway, looking from left to right before he shut the door and leaned his back against it.
“So congratulations
would be the wrong thing to say?” He mocked.
“Laugh it up,” I seethed, pacing his room, running my fingers through my hair tugging at the ends. “What the fuck am I going to do?”
He sighed, walking toward his dresser and opened a cigar box he kept on top of it. He pulled a perfectly rolled joint from inside, lifted it to his nose, breathing in the scent of the herb as he reached for a lighter and lit that shit up.
“You talk to her?” he asked.
“Barely,” I confessed, watching him as he took the first toke. “I think she’s just as fucked as me but hides it better,” I said, reaching for the joint.
“So, she’s going to keep it?”
“She’s named it already!” I said, coughing up smoke.
Bones covered his mouth to hide the laughter.
Bastard.
“Seriously, man, I’m drowning here,” I cried, taking a long drag of the joint. “My life isn’t cut for a kid. I don’t even have a car! What am I supposed to do? Strap a sidecar onto my bike?”
He took the joint from my hand and outright laughed at me. I glared at him and flipped him the bird.
“Look, you’ve got nine months to figure it out. Isn’t that how long a woman is pregnant for?”
Nine months of freedom.
Nine months to live the rest of my life.
Nine months wasn’t a very long time.
“It could be worse, bro,” he said. “At least your baby mama is hot as hell,” he took another puff. “That’s a plus,” he continued.
“Dude, I have a baby mama. Just stop right there,” I sighed heavily. “Man, I don’t want a kid. I don’t know the first thing about being a father. My old man was never around, always chasing a dollar or a dream. He thought being a father meant handing me a trust fund,” I explained. “I never had a dad so how the fuck am I supposed to be one?”
Bones crushed the joint into an ashtray and looked back at me.
“You do everything he never did,” he urged. “You man the fuck up because twenty years from now you don’t want your kid saying the same words you just did.”
Twenty years from now? I couldn’t think about twenty minutes from now.
“Don’t do that shit,” he criticized. “Don’t be my old man.”
The Tempted Series: Collectors Edition Page 102
