“Five minutes,” I warned as I crossed my arms against my chest.
I watched on as she moved towards the stairs only for him to grab her arm and whisper some shit into her ear. She finally tugged her arm free and disappeared up the stairs leaving me alone with Jack. He stalked through the living room where the walls were long ago marked with holes from his fists punching through the Sheetrock in search of bugs he believed his brother planted when he became a Fed. He never plastered the walls, keeping the reminder of the menace, his mind was and what drove him to insanity the day his son passed away.
He grabbed a pack of Marlboros off the dining room table and walked back into the living room.
“Got a light?” he asked, pushing the cigarette between his lips as he walked past me to the front door.
Fresh air.
Good idea.
I took a seat next to him on the stoop and handed him a lighter in exchange for a cigarette. I studied his profile as he took a pull, searching for all the telltale signs of a breakdown but came up short. He appeared to be battling the war in his heart and not his head. Maybe pussy did shake crazy.
“You want to talk about that?” I questioned, looking over my shoulder.
“What’s the point? You probably know more about my actions than I do,” he muttered.
There was truth to that and the reason I was his vice president. I knew Jack and I knew his maker and for a long time I’ve been the one who merges them into one.
“Not talking about your breakdown, talking about your woman,” I commented, taking a drag. “I was wrong about her, you know,” I offered. I’ve never worked Jack down from old lady bullshit and was riding blind. Give me the manic shit. I’m all aces with that.
“How’s that?”
“Guess you didn’t listen to your messages yet,” I grunted, remembering the calls I placed to him before the mayhem and after the needle. Funny how his daughter was my mayhem and not the gangster who shot me up. “Gold came by the clubhouse unannounced,” I said, shaking my head, dismissing Lacey from my mind before turning and looking him in the eye.
Fucked up.
So fucked up.
“Gotta tell you man, you should probably wife that one,” I said seriously, as I blew out a ring of smoke. I actually meant what I was saying to him. I think it would do him some good to have a genuine person in his corner, someone that accepted him as he was and didn’t try to change him. Someone who loved him despite his mind. Someone who could learn to love even that part of him.
“She was there when Gold came by?” he asked, sounding irate. “Why the hell was she still there?”
Oh, that’s right. This asshole wanted me to take his girlfriend car shopping while he took a trip to crazyville. And me? I fucking agreed to it. I also agreed to make things right with Lacey if she came by.
Fucking idiot.
“What part of unannounced didn’t you comprehend?” I hissed. “It's fine, Jimmy thinks she’s just a club whore.”
It was probably best not to tell him I forced her on her knees and made her appear to be giving me head. Wow. Each memory was worse than the last.
“She didn’t ask questions, just did as I told her—but she saw some shit,” I added, looking out into the street and for the first time I tried to put myself in Jack’s shoes. I wondered what ran through his head when he stared at the same street where his son laid as he took his last breath. It made me wonder why the fuck he didn’t sell this house and move the fuck away.
But then the answer came to me.
He kept the house for the same reason he left the holes in the walls, to remind him of who he was before he got help and when he’s tempted not to take his meds all he has to do is come here…it’s all the push he needs to do the right thing.
“What kind of shit?” he asked, pulling me away from his thoughts.
“Gold didn’t like I was the man delivering the product, said he didn’t trust me. As an act of good faith, he forced me to sample the H,” I admitted, running my fingers through my hair. “Wifey saw me with a needle in my arm and didn’t run away, she just ran right to you.”
I turned over my arm and flicked my skin and the bruise that marked it.
“No sweat, just once, didn’t even leave much of a mark,” I lied, leaving out the second hit I took after I sent his daughter away crying.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have let you deal with that prick by yourself,” he responded. “I’m making a mess of things, letting everything with Jimmy get the best of me for months now.”
“It’ll all be over soon,” I said.
“Even so, doesn’t make it okay,” he replied, cupping my shoulder. “You good?”
I had to look away from him, from the concern and guilt reflected in his eyes.
“I’m good,” I replied, clearing my throat. “Be better when these motherfuckers are off the streets.” I pulled down the sunglasses, masking my eyes as I turned back to him. “We will get them, right? We’re going to make Gold and the G-Man pay aren’t we?” I selfishly asked, needing his assurance, deserving nothing.
I needed to know we would end this nightmare. I needed to know G-Man could be stopped and finally pay for all the lives his drugs ruined and robbed. Mine. Christine’s. Those kids and all the faceless strangers we fed throughout Cain’s leadership.
“Yeah, brother, we are,” he swore.
The front door opened and Reina stormed out.
“If you’re taking me then let’s go…now,” she ordered.
Jack and I both stood at the sound of her voice. I started down the stairs as he climbed them and met her at the landing.
“Keys,” I called, waiting as she dug into her purse and threw them at me. I gave them a minute to say their goodbyes or whatever the fuck they were doing before Jack turned to me.
“Meet you back at the clubhouse,” he said, as I climbed into the truck and gave him a two-finger salute before closing my door. Reina slid into the passenger seat beside me, remaining silent as she stared at Jack through the windshield.
“Where to?” I asked, as I backed out of the driveway and turned onto the street.
“Take me to church,” she whispered.
Fucking, hell.
Chapter Four
I climbed out of my truck, slamming the door behind me as I stared back at the house, wishing I had something to numb me. I knew the minute my eyes locked with hers I’d be reminded of the piece of shit I was. There would be no light that greeted me, no pretty smile to warm me and make me wish for a better way. I turned out Lacey’s light and put pain in the pretty eyes of my angel.
I ran my fingers roughly through my hair as I walked up the few steps, wondering what the fuck I would do or say that could make this better. As I made my way toward the door I could hear the muffled sound of music—I paused, trying to make out the song when I noticed the door was slightly ajar. Instantly, I reached behind me, pulling my gun from the waistband of my jeans and aimed it at the door as I toed it open with my boot.
“Lacey?” I called as I stepped into the foyer, the barrel of my gun pointed straight ahead as I kicked the door close behind me and followed the sound of music.
I turned the corner, stepping into the living room and spotted her on the couch. She lifted her eyes to mine, wiping them with the back of her hands.
I lowered my gun as my feet paused mid stride and I took in her face. Her usually flawless skin was blotchy and her eyes were swollen from all the tears she shed. Girl, must’ve been crying for a while. I can’t remember ever seeing her cry and thank Christ for that because looking at her now was tearing me up inside.
I’m not the guy that dries tears and makes things okay. But right now? That’s the guy I want to be. I can’t fucking help myself when it comes to her. She makes me want to be all the things I’m not.
“I didn’t hear the door,” she mumbled, tipping her chin to the music playing from the surround sound.
“Door was open,” I said, walking closer to her.
&
nbsp; Her legs were bare, and she was wearing an over-sized T-shirt, her hair fell in waves around her face, the loose strands fell into her eyes but she didn’t seem bothered, or even to notice.
I wish I never touched her.
I should’ve known once would never be enough.
I tucked my gun into the back of my pants, took a seat on the coffee table in front of her and lifted one of my hands to her face, brushing the hair away from her eyes before I cupped her chin and forced her to look at me.
“Don’t cry,” I said huskily.
She bit down on her lower lip and looked away so I wouldn’t see the tears shining in her eyes.
“I’m fine, Blackie,” she insisted. “I don’t need a babysitter.”
“That’s not why I’m here,” I rasped, bringing my other hand to her face and cupping her cheeks with my palms as I forced her to turn back to me.
She blinked at me but her eyes were blank.
I tore my gaze away from her as my eyes took another sweep around the room before finding hers again. I knew that look, seen it every time I went on a bender and looked at myself in the mirror afterwards. I shook my head, dismissing the thought. There was no way Lacey would do something like that.
My Lace was too pure for poison.
Not the manufactured kind.
Or the type standing before her, aching to touch her.
Something flickered in her eyes but she remained silent as she stared back at me. I swallowed, forcing the lump lodged in my throat down and pushed the dark thoughts that ran through my head away. I gently caressed her cheeks, noting the contrast in my skin compared to hers. My rough hands, covered in faded ink, slid over her soft, reddened cheeks. She reached up, wrapped her hands around my wrists and shoved my hands away from her.
“Go away,” she hissed, inching away from me before she slowly stood up.
My eyes traveled the length of her, taking in the shirt that barely covered her ass and left her long legs exposed, reminding me how they wrapped tightly around me last night.
“You don’t want that,” I said, tearing my eyes away from her legs as she turned.
“You have no idea what I want,” she retorted.
I shoved my hands into my pockets as I stared at her thoughtfully, trying to figure out what was going on inside her head and what the hell had become of my angel. Oh that’s right… me.
I did this.
“Tell me what you want,” I said, shrugging my shoulders even though I knew I was walking into a ring of fire. I’d give her anything.
Anything.
Just to see her smile.
“I want you to leave. I want you to turn around and walk out that door. I want you to forget about the reasons you came here and more than anything…” she paused, her eyes glanced around the room as she drew in a deep breath before finding their way back to mine.
“What?” I asked as I stood tall, taking a step closer to her. Then another.
Dangerous territory, man.
Fucking lethal.
“I want you to forget whatever you’re about to say,” she admitted, causing me to freeze mid stride. “Please,” she added.
Her pleas from the night before replayed in my head.
Look at me.
Do you see me, Blackie?
I wanted to see her, to know what she was hiding behind the smile she gave the world, the smile she gave me, the one I lived for.
Give me your smile, girl.
She continued to look at me with a tortured expression on her face, eyes like her father’s not just in color but in torment. I knew that look better than anyone, had seen it countless times but never in her. I’ve talked Jack off the edge, dragged him out of his head and silenced his maker but that was Jack.
This was Lace.
My angel.
And I was the reason she looked so conflicted. There was no maker to blame, just me.
Say it.
I see you.
“I see you, Lace,” I whispered.
“A lot a good that does me,” she said.
I shook my head.
“No good at all,” I affirmed as I extended my hand, taking hers and pulling her against me. “You’d be better off if I never laid eyes on you,” I added, squeezing her hand before I lifted my free one to her cheek. “Too late,” I hissed. “Cause girl, I see you and now I can’t fucking forget you,” I admitted.
The song changed on her iPod and music filtered through the speakers. I watched recognition spark in her eyes as she turned her attention to the speaker.
“Did you ever hear this song?” she asked softly, her voice blending into the music.
“No,” I said, taking a step toward her, bending my knees and bringing us to eye level. I leaned my forehead against hers, taking our joined hands and bringing them behind her to rest against the small of her back.
I didn’t know what the fuck I was doing but I couldn’t stop.
My lips grazed her temple as she pressed her body against mine, dropping our joined hands to wrap both her arms around my neck.
“Listen to the words,” she demanded.
You’re saying I’m fragile I try not to be
I search for something only I can’t see
“Will you dance with me?” her voice pleaded as she whispered the question.
I learned then that even the toughest motherfuckers had weaknesses and mine was standing in front of me asking me to dance.
I didn’t fucking dance.
But now I did.
My feet surrendered my soul, taking the steps to bring me closer to her and give her what she needed. I’ve been feeding off her light for so long, taking the sweetness of her greedily because I’m addicted to the hope she sparks in me.
Hope that there was a shred of decency buried beneath the leather.
Repay her.
Give her back her wings.
Make it better.
Looking at her now, the selfish reasons that brought me here faded away and were replaced by the need to put her first. To put her before me, to give her back her light and pull her from the sadness that had her crying in solitude.
Just this once I could do the healing and not the reaping.
My hands moved down her back, cupping her ass beneath the t-shirt that barely covered her and I rocked her against my body.
“Blackie,” she breathed.
“Lacey,” I groaned. “I didn’t come here for this,” I said, slipping my fingers beneath her lace panties.
“I know why you came here,” she said, pulling back a fraction as her gaze dipped to my lips. “But I will do everything I can to change your mind,” she promised.
It wouldn’t take much.
“Do you remember the first time we started calling each other Leather and Lace?”
Honest to God, I wish I did. I wish I remembered every goddamn thing about me and her, then maybe I’d understand why she even gave me a second glance.
“No,” I said.
“It was the first time you took me up to see my dad and the first time I got you to smile,” she said as she continued to rest her head on my chest. “You had a chocolate shake waiting for me in the car and I forced you to take a sip,” she continued.
I vaguely remembered stopping at Carvel on the way to pick her up. Jack rarely allowed Lacey to be around the clubhouse but the few visits she made he had one of the guys rent an ice cream truck. Wolf would pass out ice cream cones all day and chocolate was her favorite. I improvised with the shake, an attempt to remind her of good memories of her father and not the shit one she was about to make visiting him in jail.
“I was trying to persuade you to have a taste, and in your ‘don’t fuck with me’ tone you called me Lace,” she reminded me.
“I see how well my ‘don’t fuck with me’ tone works on you,” I muttered as I pinched her ass then squeezed both cheeks again. What I wouldn’t give to bend her over and take that sweet cunt from behind.
She deserved better than that.
All the shit you see in the movies.
Things I’m not capable of doing.
“I’m not scared of you,” she pulled back, cocking her head to the side as her eyes bore into mine.
For the life of me I couldn’t figure out why.
“I never was nor will I ever be afraid of you, Leather,” she said, threading her fingers through my hair. “I probably should be and not for the reasons everyone else fears you,” she added, pausing a beat before she inched closer.
I need you to love me, I need you today.
Give to me your leather.
Take from me my lace.
“Foolish girl,” I whispered.
“Shhh,” she said. “Let me hang on just a little more.”
But that time I saw you.
I knew with you to light my nights.
Somehow I’d get by.
I didn’t say another word, and we both hung on, dancing to the song that seemed written just for us.
Leather.
Lace.
She pulled back slightly, brought her fingertips to my face before she leaned in and pressed her soft lips to mine. The instant her mouth was on mine I remembered the way she felt last night, how her inexperienced body eagerly arched into mine. I cupped her face with my hands, holding her still as my tongue swept across the seam of her lips, prying them apart. I felt her nails dig into the back of my neck as my tongue slid into her mouth tasting all she offered.
I came here to apologize for taking something I didn’t deserve. I came here with every intention to make things right with Lacey—being here with her in my arms I realize now that last night wasn’t going to disappear. It’s always been easy to forget the consequences of my actions and give into temptation.
I broke the kiss to look at her because looking at her was almost as intoxicating as touching her. Her eyes fluttered open, her lips swollen and wet, pursed as she brought her hands from around my neck to rest on my chest.
“I can feel your heart beat,” she said, lifting her eyes back to mine. “The only thing that makes me a foolish girl is wishing it’ll beat for me one day,” she murmured.
What the fuck was I supposed to say to that?
The Tempted Series: Collectors Edition Page 125
