She did, and stared at the box, too. But she didn't say anything. She knew he would speak when he was ready.
Finally, he said, "I've been a vampire for a very long time, and destroying one of our own is never an easy thing. Nor do I take it lightly. However, once in a while, there is someone among us who brings harm to our community." He paused and glanced up at the candlestick. His eyes glazed over for a split second, then returned to their normal clarity. "It was a mistake siring Susanna. I thought she would be astute and discerning enough to both understand the potential and accept the great responsibilities that come with being a vampire. Of course, there are many who run around flouting the unspoken rules of decorum, but when one of them becomes troublesome enough, it sometimes ends badly for them."
She got the sense that whoever had given him that candlestick had met a terrible end. And that he had been hurt by it.
"Susanna has been indiscreet with her power and is abusing it. Not only with you, but in the outside world as well. I've received many complaints about her. How she flaunts her strength and knowledge in the mortal world. That behavior puts us all at risk. I've wondered what would need to be done about her. And now that I know what she's been doing to you'¦well'¦I won't stop you."
She started. Her back shot straight up and she held onto the armrests, feeling as if she would lose all control of her body and slide off.
"But...I was hoping...that you..."
He looked up from the box and, for the first time, she saw a hint of weariness on his face. "No, I cannot do this for you. She is your sire. And your tormentor. And you must be the one to end it."
He leaned over and opened the mahogany box. Inside, it was lined in washed-out red silk and the underside of the lid had an insignia on it that had long since faded, too. In the bottom portion of the box was something wrapped in a piece of black silk. Ramon gently picked it up and held it in the palms of both hands.
"A very long time ago, I was given the task of destroying a vampire. I was entrusted with the deed because I had been close friends with him. Very close. But he was putting the community in danger with his petulance and arrogance, and..." he sighed heavily. "One of the elders of my community presented me with this." He unwrapped the item and held it out. It was a silver dagger.
"It is made with special silver, and forged by a sorcerer." He rewrapped it and returned it to the box. "Not that a regular dagger wouldn't have done the job, but the sorcerer's magic ensured its accuracy and effectiveness. Take it with you and use it on Susanna."
He ran his pinky nail down the center of his beard and pursed his lips. "Have her meet you somewhere where no one will hear what is happening. You do not want to attract attention."
He closed the lid. The candle flicked shadows across his face, illuminating the few mortal lines etched on it.
"I will tell you one more thing." He sat up straight, adjusted his cravat, and appeared as if he were composing himself after an unsettling event. "You and Susanna were not meant to be. But one day, the one you are destined to be with will enter your life. I don't know when this will occur," he continued, "but I believe that you will be given that gift near one of the new centuries. It has been observed that the world changes in significant ways, in cycles, every one hundred years, and the dawn of the new cycle will influence your world as well. I just do not know which one it will be. You will find The One. Just be patient."
Patient? It would be hard enough to wait until the year 1900, much less any other century. But she couldn't think about that now. Right now, she had to deal with Susanna.
He stood up with the box in his hand. She knew it was time to go and she stood up, too. He extended the box to her. "Do what you must do. Good luck, Fiona."
She took the box and went to the door.
As if a somber cloud had been lifted off him, he put a hand on her shoulder and smiled. "It was lovely to see you again." He kissed her on the forehead, and with that, she left. As she went down the path in front of his house, Ramon gave her one last piece of advice. "Remember, there are always choices."
She went home, and her life changed forever.
IN THE MANY years since Susanna's destruction, Fiona had felt both searing remorse and intense anger. She'd never so much as hurt a fly in her previous life, and the taking of Susanna's life...such as it was...had left her empty and desolate. But it was all tempered by the promise Ramon had made to her that there was another being somewhere who would keep her company for eternity. This person would be the salve on Fiona's painful wounds, the light that would make the darkness less lonely, and the binds that held her to this life less crushing.
She'd had to shake off the guilt and remind herself that Susanna had left her no choice. She had felt like a cornered animal, unable to run and with nothing to lose but her own sanity.
Once she embraced Rose into the life, that would be a time of renewal for Fiona, the beginning of a new era. She only hoped and prayed that Rose would also see it as her destiny and welcome the life Fiona was about to give her.
Chapter Eighteen
ROSE STARED AT the massive wooden door in Chelsea. Oh, God. Please let me do this right. She smoothed her dress with her hands, wiping away perspiration with each stroke, and knocked on the door. Mrs. Troy answered and showed her into the parlor, where Ursula appeared in minutes.
"I'¦I know I've come unannounced," Rose sputtered. "I do apologize, Ursula. But after our conversation, I simply must see your book collection."
Ursula stood motionless in the middle of the room. She looked completely bewildered.
"You see, my father wouldn't allow me to go to school, so I never had the opportunity to learn all the wonderful things you've learned. So I thought if I could see your books, perhaps borrow one or two, I could learn something from them."
The ploy was not Rose's idea. It was Fiona's. She repeated exactly what Fiona had told her to say. Something about Fiona's plan hadn't sounded right to her, but she couldn't quite put her finger on it.
What struck her--now, in the midst of carrying out Fiona's instructions--was that Ursula had had a lover. A woman. Remembering Ursula's hands on her skin, and her lips sliding over her mouth and neck, Rose's ears grew hot, and the thought of some other woman being the recipient of those caresses made her stomach tighten. It was foolish to think Ursula hadn't had a lover before. Of course she had. She was beautiful and passionate. Rose just wasn't sure if she was glad that it had been a woman. Would she have felt better if it had been a man?
"Um, of course." Notes of confusion laced Ursula's voice. "Let's see what we've got."
Ursula led Rose into her father's study with a reluctance that Rose could sense. Her posture was stiff, her tone clipped, and she wouldn't look at Rose in the eye after the initial greeting.
Once in the library, Rose pointed to various volumes, making a show of being interested. Ursula explained the major points and concepts of each.
"Well, to tell you the truth, I was more interested in the books in your room," Rose said.
Ursula remained facing the shelves, her eyes seemingly fixed on Crime and Punishment. After a moment, she said, "I don't think going to my room is a good idea."
Rose wasn't sure what to make of that. The only explanation she could come up with was that Ursula believed that if they went up to her room, something might happen. Something like the last time they were there. Which meant that Ursula still wanted her, and that made Rose dizzy with desire. Her entire body craved Ursula's touch. She was about to reach for her when Ursula spoke again.
"Rose, I haven't yet explained my actions to you. I'm so sorry for my behavior. You have my word that it will never happen again."
Rose thought for a moment that Ursula meant she'd never again run out on her the way she had. But when Ursula's gaze didn't move from the volumes on the shelf, Rose realized that she hadn't meant that at all.
She felt like a pillow that had just had all its stuffing pulled out. Suddenly, she felt smaller and her newfound s
olidity was crumbling, soon to leave her a transparent shell.
"Well, ah, that's all right." She scrambled for intelligent words. "We all do foolish things sometimes." Her face burned with humiliation. So, it seemed she'd been wrong after all. Ursula did not want her the same way she wanted Ursula. Her head ached with the burden of trying to make a decision. She wasn't sure if she still wanted to go forward with Fiona's plan. After all, even if she did help Ursula, where would it get her?
But wasn't love about doing what was best for the one you love, even if it wasn't what you yourself would want? Ursula needed her and she couldn't let her down, even if it meant losing her in the end.
"Yes," Ursula said quietly. "Uh, I'll be happy to show you my library." She turned from Rose and walked toward the door. Rose felt glued to the spot for a second or two, then she quickly followed Ursula out and up the stairs. On the way up, Rose removed her hat.
In Ursula's room, Rose listened to the brief plot explanations of Jane Eyre, Frankenstein, and Madame Bovary, all the while moving closer and closer to Ursula. Her heart pounded and she began to have doubts about whether she'd be able to carry out Fiona's instructions. The doubts warred with her need to help Ursula.
Then, as Ursula was explaining something or other about Mark Twain, Rose felt a surge of determination run through her bones, and she knew that it was now or never.
She threw her hat on the bed, then turned to face Ursula. She grasped her arms, pulled her around so that they were eye to eye. She stepped close to Ursula, so close that their breasts brushed against one another's, and lifted her hand to Ursula's cheek. With her thumb, she stroked her jawline, and then passed it over her lips. Rose thought she felt a response from Ursula's body. Is she trembling? She moved closer.
Rose brought her lips to Ursula's face and kissed her jaw from front to back and down to her neck. Ursula tilted her head back, and Rose paused momentarily, the fear returning. But then she reminded herself of Ursula's misery, and with no further hesitation, she bit down on her neck.
"Ow!" Ursula yelled and pushed Rose away.
Rose regained her footing and clumsily stepped back. Her humiliation was well reflected in her disheveled hair and torn sleeve.
Ursula stared at her, baffled, her eyebrows angled in question, and her hand on her neck. Her mouth hung open, as if she wanted to say something but didn't know what.
It took a moment for Rose to lift herself from inertia. Her hand moved to her chest in supplication. She wanted to apologize but she would disgust herself with sound of her own voice. And probably Ursula, too.
Horrified with both her own audacity and her failure to carry out her task, Rose ran out of the room and out of the house before anything could be said.
Anguished and out of breath, she stopped after running three blocks and leaned on a building. She's never going to want to see me again. Idiot! I'm an idiot. She couldn't go any farther until the sobs wracking her body subsided and she could walk without her knees buckling.
She had let her driver drop her off at Ursula's and now she found herself alone on the street. It was late and as soon as a cab came down the street, she hailed it. The cab pulled up and the driver helped her in, but she couldn't have described him, the cab, or anything they passed on the way home. For the entire ride, she cried with her hand in her hands, and prayed that she had not completely repulsed the one person in the world who meant anything to her.
URSULA STOOD IN her room with her hand on her neck, staring at the empty doorway. What had just happened?
Was it some sort of retaliation for having run out on Rose yesterday? She supposed that this was what Rose had felt like when she had left her standing there...completely bewildered.
Having Rose so close brought back the sense of longing Ursula had been trying so hard to push away all day. Rose had moved close, and Ursula had found herself drawn to the aroma of her skin and fascinated with the shade of pink on her lips. She wanted so badly to kiss those lips. They had been so soft and sweet yesterday. And so willing to kiss her back.
And Ursula had finally been able to identify her particular scent: lavender.
Rose was going to kiss her, and this time, Ursula would not run away. Her body had turned to hot wax when Rose's trembling lips touched hers. It was as if Rose's hot breath had soldered their skin together. She'd been wanting so badly to go back and change her behavior. So badly to have another chance with Rose. Another chance to kiss her sweet lips.
But then...what? Rose had bitten her. Why would she do that? It had not been a gentle, loving nip but a full-on, chomping-down bite. As if Rose were a dog.
There was something disturbing about what had just happened. She couldn't quite figure it out, but there was something familiar about it. Maybe not familiar from her own life but something she recognized just the same.
Something isn't right.
Chapter Nineteen
ROSE LOOKED OUT her bedroom window. The second floor was higher up than she'd thought. Her initial plan had been to sneak out onto the ledge, but a fear of falling gripped her. Then there was the dizziness she felt when looking down.
It was nine p.m. She'd have to wait a while longer until her parents were asleep. She'd said goodnight to them a bit earlier, knowing that they would not bother her. It was not unusual for her to go to her room at an early hour to read, write in her journal, sew, or simply go to sleep.
Since that morning, she'd been trying to think of how to contact Fiona. She needed to tell her what had happened last night and how wrong it had gone. But she had no clue where Fiona lived. Fiona had always come to her. And today was no exception. At noon, a note arrived for her:
Meet me in the park by the arch tonight, whenever you can get out. I will wait for you. Fiona
She had to be careful because Bridget had been asking questions all day long and had been watching her like a hawk. She was going to have to sneak out.
At ten, confident that her parents had retired for the evening, Rose slipped quietly down the staircase. The candle she held was bright enough to light her way but she wouldn't have needed it anyway. She had spent all her life in this house and knew every bit of it. If she'd gone blind, she still would have been able to make her way around without so much as tipping over a feather. When she reached the landing, she placed the candle on the Beaux-Arts credenza and blew it out, then turned the knob of the front door carefully so as not to make noise. It was miraculous that Bridget hadn't discovered her escaping. She thought for sure that Bridget would jump out at her from behind the staircase.
Once outside, she kept close to the house, absent-mindedly clutching at the ivy that flourished, curling and dangling everywhere, on the stone wall. Washington Square Park was dark and deserted and she would normally never go there after dark. But Rose's need to save Ursula emboldened her. Her heart pounded in her chest as she quickly entered the park.
A small group of oak trees sheltered the east side entrance, and there, with her back to the arch, Fiona waited for her, as still as the stone of the arch. Although Rose thought she was being very quiet and covert, Fiona seemed to know when she was approaching and turned toward her. When Rose got close enough, Fiona threw her arms around her, then held her by the arms.
"Oh, Rose, you're such a good person for doing this. I can see that you really care for Ursula."
Rose blushed. She'd never spoken of her feelings for Ursula aloud and it was strange for Fiona to do it. How in blazes does she know?
Rose stiffened and pushed away from Fiona.
"What happened?" Fiona asked placidly.
Fury seemed to come up from Rose's feet and shoot out of her ears. "How could you give me such ridiculous advice?" She'd barely gotten the words out when she burst into tears. "She hates me now." She sobbed into her palms.
Fiona put both hands on her shoulders and rubbed gentle circles. "What happened?"
"Oh, it was awful. I did what you said...or at least I tried." Rose lowered her hands and blinked to let the tea
rs fall.
"Show me," Fiona said. "Show me how you did it."
Rose slowly approached Fiona and leaned in. Fiona put her hand up and looked around them furtively. "Wait. Let's go over here." She pulled Rose toward a darkened spot beneath a large oak. "All right. Now. Show me."
Again, Rose leaned in and cautiously placed her mouth on Fiona's neck. She wanted to get this right. She didn't want a repeat performance of what had happened with Ursula, and she didn't want to make a fool of herself again.
As she hesitated, she took in Fiona's scent. She wore some kind of perfume that Rose couldn't identify. Underneath that, though, was another smell. It was strange and earthy, almost like the smell of dirt after a rainstorm.
"Go ahead. Don't be afraid," Fiona prodded.
Rose swallowed, determined to be strong. She opened her mouth again and hinged her teeth on a piece of skin along Fiona's throat, and bit down. As she did so, Fiona tilted her head back slightly. Rose could swear she heard a faint moan. Of pleasure? The sound struck her as inappropriate and she moved away.
Fiona was facing heavenward. On her face was a look of ...ecstasy?
"Well?" Rose asked impatiently after a moment.
"Well." Fiona shook her head slightly. She had a hazy look to her eyes, like she'd been daydreaming. "I understand your problem. You're not angling your canines properly. Here, let me show you."
Fiona gently cupped Rose's chin in her hands and tilted her head backward. Rose's fear rippled along her skin, and her heart almost lodged in her throat when she felt the tip of Fiona's tongue quickly flick across her neck.
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