“Please tell me he’s going to be okay?” I wasn’t sure if I was asking or begging, probably a bit of both.
“I’ll send the doctor right in,” she responded.
“Wait! Can I touch him?”
She smiled. “Of course you can. The machines are there to monitor his vitals and help to pump oxygen through his little body.”
Her kind voice brought tears to my eyes. As I sat there holding my son’s little hand, I thought back on his life and all the things I would do different if he made it through this.
The doctor arrived shortly and gave me the news. Kalen was in the water too long. They couldn’t detect any brain function. His body was starting to shut down and it was unlikely he would make it through the night.
I did not fall apart, like I wanted to. Instead, I kissed the top of my son’s head and went in search of my mother. I needed answers.
The sound of a phone interrupted my trip down memory lane. I saw it was Bobby calling and answered it, “Talk to me.”
“Found it,” he said. “Jimmy wrote a personal check to Ray Gleason in the amount of five thousand dollars.” Ray Gleason was the name of the guy who whispered in Dillon’s ear before trying to take him down. “For such a smart guy, Jimmy sure is a dumb motherfucker.” Bobby said.
“No, he just thought he wouldn’t get caught. Are the police getting him?” I asked.
“Yep, they should have him by now.”
“Good deal. What about Dana? Do you think we have enough dirt on her to hand over to the police, yet?”
We not only discovered Dooley had Dana on his payroll, but also that she was most likely the person who told him where to find Piper the day she was kidnapped.
“I’ll put the call in to the police right now,” Bobby said, “Go ahead and fax the files over.”
“I’m on it,” I told him.
“Are you going to MMG’s Fourth of July party?” Bobby asked.
In truth, I hadn’t really given it much thought. I bet Sarah will be there.
Just the thought of seeing Sarah lifted my mood a little. “I was thinking about it. Are you?”
“Yeah, I would bring a date, but Sally wants to hang out.”
Sally and Bobby had been hanging out quite a bit lately. “Sally Wilder will chew you up and swallow you whole, brother,” I teased.
Bobby laughed. “You ain’t kidding. Sally’s fun to hang with and all, but she’s not really my type, if you know what I mean.” I thought of Bobby’s latest conquest, Bubbles, and had to agree. He liked giant breasted bottle blondes. Sally was tiny, tatted and tricky… not his type at all.
After we hung up, my mind drifted to the thought of seeing Sarah again. I missed her. I wanted her, maybe more than I’d ever wanted anything. No, that’s not true. I wanted the divorce from Alexandria and for my son to still be alive more than anything, even Sarah.
Sarah would have loved Kalen. My phone rang again. I checked to see who was calling and when I saw it was my mom, I sent it straight to voicemail. I wasn’t ready to talk to her. I wasn’t sure if I’d ever be ready.
“What the fuck happened? I was gone for two days! Two days!” I shouted at my mother.
“Don’t blame this on your mother,” my dad growled.
I glanced around the room. Where the hell was everyone? “Where is Alexandria? More so, where the fuck is Vicky? I told her not to take her eyes off of Kalen while I was gone! What the hell happened?”
“We are not a hundred percent sure,” my sister answered.
“I didn’t know,” my mother whispered. “Why didn’t you tell me how bad it had gotten?”
I sank into the closest chair and dropped my head to my hands. “I tried, Mom, but you didn’t want to hear it. No one did.” Taking a deep breath, I said, “Please, somebody please tell me what happened.” I felt a presence next to me, but didn’t bother to look up. My mother’s pungent perfume gave her away.
“I phoned Alexandria and asked her to lunch. I told her to bring Kalen, but she said he was cutting teeth and was cranky.”
I didn’t know he was cutting teeth.
“We had a late lunch at the Palm,” she continued. “Alexandria seemed a little edgy, but otherwise fine. When I asked her about it, she said she hadn’t been sleeping well. She claimed it was due to you being away on business.”
Yeah right. Xan and I hadn’t slept in the same bed ever, and hadn’t had sex in too many days to count.
“When I took her home, I asked if I could come in and see Kalen. At first I thought she was going to tell me no, but she saw how excited I was, and reluctantly agreed to let me come in.” Her voice cracked with emotion. “He had just woken up from a nap and was sitting in Vicky’s lap drinking a sippy of milk. He was so happy to see me.”
Kalen loved my mom. She doted on him like a grandmother should and he ate it up.
“Was she drinking during lunch?” I asked.
“No, she wasn’t. That’s why I agreed to let Vicky go.”
My eyes shot up and connected with hers. “What?” I whispered. Pain and guilt radiated across her face.
“While I was there, Vicky got a call. Her mother had fallen and needed help. Alexandria told her to go, but Vicky said you would be unhappy if she left and she would lose her job. Alexandria got angry with her. I saw how upset Vicky was and then Kalen started crying. Alexandria was fine. I swear it. Otherwise, I would never have agreed with Alexandria.”
“What happened?” I pushed her to move forward with the story.
“Vicky left and I went home. A few hours later, Vicky called. We were on our way home from dinner. She was hysterical. S-she said Alexandria was passed out in one of the pool chairs and Kalen…Kalen was nowhere to be found.” She let out a sob. “She found him while she was talking to me on the phone. H-h-he was in the pool. She tried to save him, Caswell, I swear.”
Oh God. My worst nightmare had come true. Alexandria killed our son.
“The police?” I asked.
“By the time we arrived, Sterling had taken care of everything. Alexandria was upstairs in the bedroom and Vicky had gone home.”
Of course Sterling took care of it. Sterling took care of everything Xan did. I searched around for Sterling, but he was nowhere to be seen.
“Mr. Ashford!” A nurse called. “Come quick!”
I was up in a flash and running for Kalen’s room.
Please no!
For the next hour, I held my son’s hand and talked to him. I told him how much I loved him and how proud I was to be his dad. I made sure he knew he would never be forgotten. As I watched my son take his last breath, I finally let go and cried.
I drove straight from the hospital to Vicky’s house, where I made her tell me what really happened.
The day I buried my son was the worst day of my life. I kept thinking it should be Alexandria in that hole, not my little boy. I couldn’t even look at her, much less be in a room with her. I didn’t know who I hated most, me or her. Kalen’s death was just as much my fault as it was hers.
I knew Alexandria had a problem. I knew it was getting worse. In her own way, I believe she loved our son, but she loved her drugs and booze more. Without Kalen, Alexandria had no reason to stay sober and hit rock bottom. Booze, pills, pot, you name it, she was doing it.
Then I moved to Charlotte and met Sarah.
Sarah.
From top to bottom the woman was sheer perfection. She would never understand about Alexandria. I’m not sure anyone would. Once my divorce is final, all ties to Alexandria will be gone. Then, and only then, will I be able to think about moving on with my life.
* * *
“Have you found Dana yet?”
Bobby and I were on our way to MMG’s first annual Fourth of July party. Dillon was out of the hospital and he and Isabella were back together. Jimmy was in jail. That left one loose end: Dana. The police were looking for her without any luck. She should have been behind bars by now. What the hell was taking so long?
“I called earlier. They gave me the same song and dance. Only, today, they added a new tune about it being the Fourth and how all their manpower was tied up in check points and fireworks. My guess is the bitch caught wind they were looking for her and hauled ass,” Bobby answered.
“Let’s hope they find her, and soon.”
“They will.”
I could hear music blasting from the parking lot of MMG. It was a country song about girls, beer and partying. Aren’t they all? Bob and I grabbed the cases of beer we’d bought on the ride over, and made our way around back to where the party was in full swing. I immediately spotted Sarah in the crowd. She had on a pair of white short shorts and a tight red top. She bent over to pet the dog at her feet and I thought about the last time we were together. The image of her long legs wrapped around my waist as I pumped in and out of her tight little pussy ran through my head and I had to look away. Great, everyone will now see me sporting a boner. Just what I need.
I dropped the case of beer off in the kitchen and waited a few minutes before going back outside. Through Herculean effort, I managed to stay away from Sarah most of the afternoon. I made sure to use the upstairs bathroom in order to avoid running into her. It was just my luck she had the same idea and we ended up exactly where I didn’t want us to be; alone together.
Sarah tried to scoot past me without speaking. I almost let her go, but couldn’t, and ended up grabbing her arm before she could get away.
“Hey, I’m sorry about what happened at my place,” I told her.
Sarah stared down at my hand gripping her arm while I was speaking. When I finished, her eyes lifted to mine. They were completely void of emotion.
What the hell?
She had never looked at me this way. In fact, I had never seen her look at anyone this way. I didn’t like it one bit. I raised my eyebrow and asked, “Did you hear me?”
Her eyes flashed with anger. “Oh, I heard you alright,” she clipped.
“What is wrong with you?”
Leaning forward onto the balls of her feet, she gave it to me. “What’s wrong with me? I’ll tell you what’s wrong. You shagged me and, yet again, blew me off with some lame excuse as to why you can’t be with me. Then,” she threw up her hands in exasperation, “I find out you are kissing Isabella and playing baby daddy to her daughter. If you wanted to be with her, why in the hell did you sleep with me, Cas?”
Her words shocked and pissed me off. For years I had lived with Alexandria’s accusations. If she wasn’t accusing me of cheating, she was accusing me of spending her daddy’s money. If I wasn’t having sex with her, then there had to be someone else. Yes, there was someone else, my fucking hand. Sarah doing the same thing Xan did was more than I could handle.
“Are you asking me if I was with Isabella? Because it sounds to me like an accusation. You came to my house in the middle of the night, Sarah, not the other way around. When I was lodged deep inside you, I didn’t hear you complaining. I heard you screaming mine and God’s name. As far as blowing you off. I have always been straight with you. In fact, from square one I told you we needed to keep it simple. If, and that’s a big if, I wanted to be with Isabella, you have no say in it because we are not together. I made sure to stress the last part. Now, had you asked me if Isabella and I were involved, I would have told you, no. Isabella belongs to Dillon. She always has. But you didn’t, you acted like a child and threw accusations in my face.” Her angry expression morphed into one of hurt, but I was too pissed to care. I’d apologized for being a dick and she spewed her insecurities all over me. Fuck that.
“Unbelievable,” she said.
“You got that right,” I agreed.
“I am going back to Scotland,” she hissed.
“I think that’s a wise decision,” I retorted. The second I said it, I wanted to take it back. The last thing I wanted was her leaving the country. Sarah’s eyes filled with tears. Feeling like a complete shit, I reached out for her and pulled back when I noticed someone standing in the room with us.
Ellie.
“Ummm, guys, Max is changing Mac in one of the rooms up here. You need to take it somewhere else or…”
“There’s nothing for Max to see,” I stated.
Sarah gave me a scathing look and shot out of the room like her tail was on fire, leaving me with a very unhappy Ellie.
“I have no clue what is going on between you two.” I opened my mouth to speak, but she held up her hand to stop me. “And, I don’t want to know,” she continued. “Sarah has been through hell and back. She is young and beautiful, Cas, but she is fragile in a way you cannot understand. Whatever you do, please remember that.”
Caught up in my own personal hell, I hadn’t bothered to think about what Sarah might be going through. Just another reason we should not be together. Sarah deserves someone who puts her feelings first and has no baggage. The thought of another guy touching her perfect body infuriated me. Anyway you sliced it, I was fucked.
With a nod of my head to Ellie, I went to find Bobby and another beer.
Dinner was followed by fireworks. Max and Kurt were too drunk to handle explosives, so Dillon, Tut and I took over. Not long after fireworks ended, people started taking off. Among the first to leave were Isabella, Sally and Sarah. After our encounter upstairs, Sarah wouldn’t look at me the rest of the night. I had to admit, it smarted. I kept telling myself she was better off without me, but truth be told, I was having doubts. Something deep inside me twisted as I watched her walk away tonight. Right as she rounded the corner of the garage, she looked back over her shoulder. Our eyes connected and held. Then she looked away and disappeared around the corner. I had to stop myself from going after her.
“You’ve been staring at my baby sister all night, Ashford. What gives?”
Damn.
I turned to see a very calm looking Max watching me. I wasn’t buying it. Under his calm, cool façade he was coiled like a snake ready to strike. The daring glint in his eyes told me everything I needed to know.
“Even if I wanted her, I couldn’t have her,” I admitted. I could tell from his expression, I’d surprised him.
With a slight cock of his head, he replied, “Yeah, why’s that?”
I gave him the simplest answer I could think of, “Because, she is way too good for me.”
A puzzled look appeared on his face. “I don’t know about that. I do know if you pursue her, I will have to kill you. I really don’t want to do that because I like you.”
Ellie’s exasperated “Max!” startled us. We both turned to see her standing in the kitchen doorway with a drooling Mac in her arms. “There will be no killing!” she loudly stated.
Max winked at her. Then he looked back at me and nodded his head. I got it. He wanted me to leave his baby sister alone. Max’s phone rang and he paused long enough to fish it out of his back pocket and answer it.
“Max McLellan,” he answered. He listened for a moment and then his body tensed. Something was wrong. “We’ve got a bad connection. Can you repeat that last sentence?” he shouted at the person on the other end. After a few more seconds of listening, he shouted, “What the fuck? Is everyone okay? What about Sarah?” The panicked look on his face had me worried.
The night Kalen died flashed through my head and I began pacing. Please tell me Sarah is okay.
“Got it,” he said. Then he ended the call.
I waited for him to speak, but he walked right past me and folded Ellie into his arms. I wanted to punch him.
“The girls have been in an accident. I need you to drive me to the site,” he told Ellie.
Whoa, what? What did he mean they’d been in an accident?
Ellie’s dad starting talking about Mac, but all I could hear was white noise. Sarah. Without thinking, I bolted for the parking lot. That’s when I realized I didn’t drive my truck, Bobby did.
Fuck!
Max ran past me and I hauled ass after him. When we stopped beside his truck, he started hassling me
. “I knew you were lying!” he all but shouted at me.
Before we got into it, Ellie was there telling him to cool it.
Please let Sarah be alive, I chanted to myself. Images of Kalen taking his last breath played like a silent movie in my head.
Ellie placed her hand on my shoulder and whispered, “It’s going to be okay.” Her calm, soothing tone helped me to get my footing and pull back from the rabbit hole I was about to plunge down. By the time we got to the crash site, I could once again think rationally, but barely. Ellie put the truck in park and Max and I simultaneously jumped out. We darted through the mass of people surrounding the ambulances and spotted Isabella at the same time. She pointed us to where Sarah was.
We found her as she was being loaded into the ambulance. She was unconscious with her head strapped down to the backboard. Her arm was splinted to her side and the paramedic said her vitals were good, but he was concerned that she was still out. The ambulance was taking her to the nearest hospital for further tests. As the ambulance was about to pull away, Max jumped in with them and told me to ride with Ellie. I wanted to ride with Sarah. I needed to be by her side, but I knew I couldn’t because I had no claim on her. Instead, I sprinted back to Max’s truck and climbed in the passenger’s side.
After explaining to Ellie what was happening, she attempted to talk to me about Sarah, but I couldn’t. All I could focus on were the last words we’d spoken and the thought that I may never get the chance to make things right with her. I had been here once before and it nearly killed me. I wasn’t sure if I could handle it again. That’s when it hit me.
I’m in love with her.
Chapter Eleven
Sarah
‡
I woke with an excruciating headache and an obnoxious beeping noise echoing through my aching skull.
Turn off the damn alarm!
I started to roll over and a spear of pain ripped through my left hand.
Owowowowowowow!
“She’s waking up,” Max said.
Keep It Simple (MMG Series Book 4) Page 13
