by Kaye Blue
That wouldn’t last forever.
The time would come when Kristian would settle down and start to build a life that wouldn’t include me. I needed to make sure I wasn’t left with nothing but regret that I’d never taken the time to find a love of my own. So yet again, I was reminded that I was doing the right thing, felt my resolve stiffen.
“You hiding out?” Kristian asked as he walked up to me.
“You’re the second person today to ask me that question. You saw me on the dance floor, so you know I’m not hiding,” I said, looking over my shoulder.
“Guess not, but I wouldn’t exactly say that this quarter of the garden is right in the thick of things,” he responded.
“Yet here you find yourself,” I countered.
The dim moonlight had cast his face in shadows, but I could still see his familiar expression, felt an unfamiliar tug in my chest.
“Yet here I find myself. I’ve done what I came here to do, and now it’s time to move on,” he said.
I glanced away, studying some azaleas, but at the tone of his voice I turned to look at him again.
“Meaning?” I asked.
My heart started to tremble, then beat a little bit faster.
“Meaning if you’re ready to go, I’d like to wrap up the evening, Dallas,” he said.
There was something about the way he said the words, not a casual “Dallas get your ass out here and let’s go,” nor the very formal tone that he would take if he were in a princely role.
No, this was something else, something different, intimate, but in a way that was different than the way we so often were.
And it hit me.
Tonight was the night.
My next breath came out short, and my body began to tingle, little pinpricks stinging my scalp.
“You should give a girl some warning,” I said before laughing nervously.
“If you need more time—”
I shook my head quickly. “I don’t. I’m ready,” I said.
He looked at me, his face telling me he didn’t exactly believe what I was saying, but eventually, he nodded.
“Did you drive?” he asked.
“What?” I said.
My heart, which had been trembling before, had started to pound, sending a rush of blood to my head. It had also apparently completely distracted me, made it impossible for me to process Kristian’s very simple sentence.
“I asked if you drove,” he said, his voice light, teasing, reminding me of the Kristian I knew so well.
I shook my head. “No, I cabbed it. Didn’t know how much of that excellent Medina champagne I was going to drink.”
“And how much have you had to drink?” he asked.
“Not a drop,” I said.
He nodded, his approval apparent. “That’s good. I want you to have a clear head.”
At his words, I felt my sex clench, my mind instantly filled with images of Kristian and me connected most intimately, our bodies entwined.
Funny, but when I had pitched this whole help-me-get-rid-of-my-pesky-virginity thing, I hadn’t thought about the logistics of it. I had, in a vague, causal kind of way, but when I looked at Kristian now, I could see there was nothing vague or gauzy about this.
This was going to be real, him and me together physically, connected in a way that I had never connected with anyone else.
The thought scared me, and at the same time made me desperate with need.
“Lead the way,” I said.
Eleven
Dallas
“You don’t have to be nervous,” Kristian said with a soft squeeze of my hand.
“What makes you think I’m nervous?” I squeaked in a voice about three octaves higher than my usual one.
Kristian shrugged. “Don’t know where I’d ever get that idea,” he said.
I returned his smile and then shook my head and relaxed back against the seat of the black SUV.
We had been in the car for twenty-five minutes, and this was the first time some of the tension had left my body.
“What gave it away?” I asked, lazily turning my head to look at Kristian.
“You’ve been wound up since we left the engagement party. If you’re not ready—”
“No,” I said, interrupting him. “I’m ready.”
Kristian held my gaze for a moment, and I could see he wasn’t sure if he believed me. After another second he nodded.
“So relax. This doesn’t have to be anything you don’t want it to be.”
“I know what I want it to be, I’m just… You know, the unknown and all that,” I said.
Kristian nodded, his sincerity apparent. “You really don’t have to do this, Dallas. If you’re this uncomfortable, maybe it’s not the best—”
“If I’m like this with you, imagine how I’d be with a stranger?” I said.
The way I was acting now was only firming my resolve to go through with this. I knew Kristian, trusted him completely, yet I was having a hard time even drawing a deep breath. Were he someone I didn’t have that level of trust with, I’d probably run away screaming, or puke right in the guy’s lap.
“Presumably he wouldn’t be a stranger anymore when you got to this point,” Kristian said.
His logic was true, but irritating and I looked at him, wondering if I had missed some cue.
“If you changed your mind, you don’t have to—”
It was Kristian who interrupted me. “I haven’t changed my mind. I just want you to know you have the option. No matter what, I’m here for you,” he said.
Even though the car was dark, the tinted windows making it even darker than the night, I could see Kristian’s earnestness and knew he was telling the truth.
Felt my heart soften, a feeling I tried so desperately to ignore.
“Thank you.”
“Anytime,” he said and flashed me a quick smile.
I was used to his smile, but it looked different now, took on a quality, a sexiness I hadn’t noticed before. Maybe I was just reading into things. I was nervous, there was no way to deny it, but I was also excited.
All during the party I had watched Kristian, seen the way he moved, the way his eyes sparkled when he laughed, the strength he exuded…
This was nerve-racking, but sleeping with him certainly wouldn’t be a hardship.
“We’re here,” I said, looking away from Kristian to the parking garage as the gates opened.
“We are. You sure you don’t want to go to your place?” he asked.
“No, this is fine. And stop hovering,” I said, chiding him playfully.
“I’m not hovering, Dallas. I’m seeing that you’re taken care of,” he responded.
My heart softened yet again, and had I a fraction less discipline, I might have swooned.
I wasn’t exactly sure why. Kristian was always polite, bordering on chivalrous, but tonight, it was taking on a different meaning, and I was reacting to it.
The butterflies in my stomach deepened, became something else, and as we walked through the garage to the elevator, my breath started to come out shorter, but not out of nerves.
No, what I was feeling now was desire.
It wasn’t unfamiliar. I was human, after all. But my body had never felt as attuned as it did now, as eager. And as nervous as I was, even more I felt anticipation. It moved through my blood like a drug, making me feel both lightheaded and grounded.
As the elevator moved up from the ground floor to the penthouse, I looked over at Kristian. My inclination had been to be surreptitious, try not to let him see that I watched, but at the last moment I decided not to. Soon, he was going to see parts of me that no one else ever had. Now was as good a time as any to start that openness.
So I met his gaze, saw how his eyes darkened, deepened, and in that moment I realized I was not alone in my desire.
My next exhale came out sharp, the short sound filling the elevator car.
Kristian had heard it. There was no way he couldn’t have, and I knew he could see
what I was feeling. Knew what I wanted.
As the elevator came to a stop, he reached over and stroked his finger against my cheek. The caress was soft, barely there, but it was like a match to tinder.
On instinct I shifted my head and sucked his thumb between my lips.
It was Kristian’s turn to let out a sharp exhale.
He did, and his eyes darkened even further, the desire in them now something more like a hunger, and even more than before, I was anxious to move forward.
Kristian unlocked the door and let me in. Once he closed it, he turned back to me.
“You need anything?” he asked, his eyes still blazing with that hungry passion, but also soft with concern.
“You,” I responded.
“That is the correct answer,” he said.
He flashed a quick smile and then was all business.
We had stood several feet apart, but by silent agreement, we closed that distance and met in the middle of his foyer.
Kristian’s kiss was strong, almost overpowering, but not quite.
It was perfect.
I had replayed those moments in the kitchen before over and over again, and when I finally felt his lips on mine once again, relief and even more anticipation than I’d felt before filled me.
“Open for me, Dallas,” Kristian whispered against my lips.
I parted them without wasting a breath, and Kristian responded with the same speed.
He slipped his tongue into my mouth and began to devour me, tasting every millimeter with his tongue.
I tried to participate, nudging his tongue with mine, but soon I just gave in and let the sensation rock me.
His tastes on my tongue, his scent in my nose, his body under my hands…
All of it was perfection, something I hadn’t known I was missing but could already wonder how I would ever live without.
He broke the kiss, his breath coming out deep, his massive chest rising and falling.
“Are you sure?” he asked.
His words were soft, almost unintelligible, but it wasn’t lost on me that even in the midst of his passion he was concerned about me.
“I’m sure,” I said without pause.
He leaned forward and kissed me hard on the lips and then backed away.
I blinked, then gestured toward the hallway.
“Do you mind if we use my room?” I asked.
“No,” he responded.
Then, without another word, he lifted me and began to walk toward the guest bedroom as he kissed my neck.
I wanted to marvel at his display of strength, but I was too distracted by the feeling of his hard body under mine, his strong arm around my waist, his lips pecking at the delicate skin of my neck.
When we reached the bedroom, he paused in the doorway and let me slide down his body. I felt every inch of him from the hard slab of his chest, to his flat stomach, down over the burgeoning ridge of his erection.
I brushed it with the back of my hand, anxious to feel more, but still a little nervous, too shy to reach out to touch him.
It was as if Kristian could read my mind. He reached for my hand and then laid it against him, my palm flat against him, sandwiched between his hardness and his hand.
“Oh,” I said.
Kristian’s soft chuckle was my response. And I could understand why he laughed.
My word, if I could even call it that, wasn’t eloquent, but it perfectly expressed what I was feeling.
Surprise at how he felt against my hand even through his clothes, hard, warm, so alive.
My own sex clenched as I realized I would soon feel what lay under my palm inside me.
I was trembling with the anticipation of that, but quickly backed away from Kristian, needing a moment.
“Can I have a minute?” I whispered.
“Take all the time you need. I’ll be here,” he said.
He gave me another hard, quick kiss, and then sat on the edge of the bed as I went to the attached bathroom.
I called this my room because when I slept over at Kristian’s, which happened a fair amount, I stayed here. I even had a few changes of clothes and some toiletries in the bathroom, something I was happy about.
I’d been in Kristian’s bedroom, had even slept in it, but I wasn’t sure I was ready to do that, not in there.
For some reason, being in his bed held more significance, would make this into something else altogether, and I was having a hard enough time dealing with what it was now. Adding additional layers would do me no good.
So I went to the bathroom, wanting a few moments to gather myself, but still eager to be with him.
I hadn’t really considered what this would be like, but now that I was in the moment, I knew that this was right.
I took down my hair, letting it fall wildly around my shoulders, then removed the heels, followed that with my dress and my underwear.
I stood in the bathroom naked, looked in the mirror, staring at my familiar reflection, but I didn’t linger. I was what I was, and there was no way I could hide from it. And I didn’t want to.
What I wanted was on the other side of the door.
And I was going to take it.
Kristian
My heart was racing, my cock throbbing in time with it.
The desire I felt now was extreme, seemed like enough to consume me. But while I was familiar with physical needs, animal attraction, this thing I was feeling with Dallas was something more. I wanted her, wanted to do every dirty thing I could think of to her and with her.
But even more, I cared about her. I wanted to see after her well-being. Make sure she felt treasured, loved.
And it was that last that was fucking me up.
I knew my affection for Dallas was deep, but this was more than that.
I just told myself that I was addled, the excitement of the night, and the anticipation of what was to come screwing with my head.
I wished it was that easy, but I wasn’t sure it was.
I considered that, but then all thought fled when I heard the bathroom door creak.
Dallas walked out, and though the room was only barely lit, I could instantly see that she was naked.
I couldn’t make out the details of her body, but I saw the soft curve of a hip, the gentle sway of her breasts as she moved, the fullness of her thighs that went down to strong, sleek calves.
“Dallas, you aren’t wearing any clothes,” I said.
I sounded like a dullard, and Dallas laughed, confirming that she agreed.
“Kristian, your powers of observation never fail to amaze me.”
She stopped at the edge of the bed, and though she had tossed out her usual sarcastic comment, I could hear the tremble of nerves in her voice.
I stood and quickly rounded the bed to her and reached up to caress her cheek.
I kept my eyes firmly on hers, though I wanted to look down, explore the bounty of her body.
“I was looking forward to taking that dress off you myself,” I said.
I didn’t directly address whatever was going on with her, instead choosing humor as a way to break some of the tension.
“Maybe later,” she said.
“And why did you deny me that amazing opportunity?” I asked.
Dallas sighed, then sat on the edge of the bed.
“I wanted to get it over with,” she said, sounding glum.
“Get what over with?” I asked.
“You know, the whole awkward let’s-get-naked thing.”
“And what would you know about the whole awkward let’s-get-naked thing? Aren’t you the virgin?” I asked.
“Yeah, but I’m not a moron,” she said.
I caressed her cheek again, then held her chin between my hands, making sure our eyes were locked.
“Dallas, this isn’t TV, or a book, or crappy Internet porn,” I said.
“Then what is it?” she asked.
Her voice was breathy and had a faint tremble in it.
“This,�
�� I said, caressing her jawbone, then moving down her neck, over her collarbone. “This is us. You and me, Dallas and Kristian.”
As I spoke, I trailed my fingers down her chest, over the curve of her breast, down her pebbled nipple.
She inhaled sharply, and I swore I felt that sound in my cock, which twitched with anticipation that I had thought couldn’t get any stronger.
“This is us,” she said.
“Yeah,” I responded.
I slowly kneeled down until I was between Dallas’s legs, eye to eye with her.
I kissed her lips softly, then trailed down her neck, down her collarbone, following the same path my fingers had traced earlier.
When I reached her breasts, I didn’t go for the nipple that seem to be calling to me. Instead I stroked the tender underside with my lips, and used my fingers to tease her other.
“Oh,” she said, her voice deep.
“That seems to be the word of the day.”
“Yeah, guess so,” she answered breathlessly.
I looked up at her and saw the smile on her face.
That was what I wanted to see. Dallas, relaxed, comfortable, knowing that she was with me and that I would take care of her.
I wanted to hear her say the words, but I stayed silent. Now wasn’t the time, and she had enough to deal with already. Reassuring me shouldn’t be on her plate too.
I stretched up to kiss her lips again, then pushed her shoulder until she fell back on the bed.
She lay still for a moment, then propped herself up on her elbows.
“What are you doing?” she asked.
“What do you think?” I responded.
My hands were on the inside of her thighs, right at the V of her legs. I was close enough to feel the heat coming from her sex, but not touching her.
“Seems like you’re trying to tease me until I go crazy,” she said.
“A very astute observation. Are you sure you’ve never done this before?” I asked.
I inched my hands up higher, then brushed one finger down the edge of her outer lip, back up again.
She arched her back, her body going rigid and then soft as she stared down at me.
“Yeah, I’m sure. Which is why I don’t understand why you’re doing this instead of just getting to it,” she said.
