(Nic Smith) What is Miriam?
A: A librarian!!!
(MJP, Dina Reyna)) Who is Mr. Nice?
A: For the record, Mr. Nice is not “nice.” He is the antithesis of the adjective, the name short for Nicephorus, which is the Greek bastardization of Nikephoros. Rumor has it that he was a Byzantine general, born around the 800s. The man now sits on the council and is quite possibly the scariest vampire I have ever met. He has also stolen Miriam and become obsessed with the Fanged Love vampire romance series. He believes that he and Miriam are the protagonists.
(Nic Smith, Leanne Johnston) What is Mr. Nice’s favorite book series?
A: Fanged Love.
(Vickie Harvey) What is the human equivalent of a flash of fang?
A: Grabbing one’s manhood and telling someone to suck it.
(Deb Halpin Kritler) What is Miriam’s code phrase to unlock the vault?
“I want to lick Mr. Darcy.”
(Vickie Harvey) What does Michael salivate at the thought of touching?
A: Miriam’s first editions.
(Jessy Boucher) How many professions has Michael had?
A: Nine counting librarian’s assistant.
(Jessy Boucher) Who turned Michael into a vampire?
A: A two-thousand-year-old vampire named Cluentius Boethius, aka Clive Bakker.
(Jessy Boucher) Which generation of vampire is Michael?
A: Second.
(Gina Guerrero) How old is Michael? How old is Michael to Miriam?
A: Over four hundred years old. Miriam thinks he’s about eighteen.
The Librarian’s Vampire Assistant, Book 4 Page 17