by KD Robichaux
“Sorry, bro.” Seven has the decency to look ashamed at his slip.
“Let’s get back on track. Everyone, take a deep breath and let it out.” After we do as Dr. Walker instructs, he continues, “Vivian, ask your questions. What is important to you to learn first? And then we will all help fill in the blanks of what you don’t know to ask.”
I nod, sitting back against the couch cushion, the side of my leg still pressed against Corbin’s, but enough space between the rest of our bodies for me to think straight.
“What does he mean you followed me all these years?” I question quietly, not looking over at him.
Corbin scrubs down his face once more before sitting up straighter, turning to face me more in his seat. He takes a breath, and that’s when I finally look up to meet his eyes. There’s so much pain there it hurts my chest, and instinctively I reach out to take his hand.
“To answer that, I have to back up a few years,” he starts, and I nod. “After that phone call… the last time I ever spoke to you, I sent you those divorce papers, but something in me couldn’t let you go. It wasn’t until your therapy sessions when I learned the truth about what happened to you, that I realized why.”
It’s not until this very second that I become completely aware of the fact that Corbin would have seen all the footage of my sessions with Dr. Walker. “You… you know everything?” My voice catches in my throat and I have to swallow past the lump there as I try to fight off my urge to burst into tears.
“I know everything, baby girl. I know you never cheated on me. I know you lied to protect me, to keep me from going after that motherfucker and ending up in jail. And after I learned all of this, I couldn’t even be mad that you lied to me. Because you were exactly right. I would have gunned him down, uncaring what happened to me after I slaughtered him.” He reaches out and tucks my hair behind my ear, and I lean in to his touch.
“Let’s return to her original question,” Dr. Walker inserts gently. “Continue from after your divorce.”
“Right.” Corbin clears his throat again. “I stayed in the army for a few more years, but always kept my eye on you as much as I could. Just making sure you were okay. But then I got deployed again, and I was shot—”
I gasp sharply, my hand coming up to cover my mouth as a tear finally spills from my eye. “You were shot?” I cry behind my hand, searching his face, which seems unaffected by something that has me distraught inside.
“Yeah, babe. No big deal. I was actually shot twice and stabbed once. But I’m all good. I got to keep one of the bullets, though. I set off metal detectors every time.” He smiles, trying to lighten my worry, but I only shake my head, slinging a couple more tears free. Seeing my distress isn’t going away with his joking words, he pulls my hand away from my mouth, holding all four of our clasped hands to his chest as he speaks firmly. “Baby, I’m fine. I promise. What we just did in the playroom, did that feel like I wasn’t all right?”
My face flames thinking about our lovemaking, heating even further when I realize it had been witnessed by Dr. Walker as well. Instead of following up on that, I get us back on track. “What happened after you were hurt?”
“Well, they gave me a couple awards and sent me on my way with a slap on the ass. Kicked me out with an honorable discharge. That’s when this guy approached me,” he explains, hiking his thumb over at Dr. Walker.
“He wanted you to run the club with him?” I ask, glancing over at the therapist, who cocks his eyebrow at Corbin, who goes silent. “What? What is it?” When he still doesn’t answer, my eyes find Dr. Walker’s once more.
He looks between Corbin and me for a moment before leaning forward to brace his elbows on his knees once again. “All right. In my professional opinion, full disclosure in this session is imperative to reestablishing trust. I don’t think it’s even hit Vivian yet that you’re sitting here with her, Corb. You being the center of her thoughts all these years, it probably still feels to her like she somehow conjured you. Especially having learned you’re here while she was so deep into her AES. She was already imagining you were someone else, reenacting the most traumatizing experience of her life. And then in the middle of that, you revealed that not only was she not with her rapist, and not even who she thought was her Dom, Seven, who would have had a stranger’s face, but you. Corbin, the person you had encouraged her to imagine during her training sessions so she could orgasm without guilt. Can you possibly conceive the mindfuck she is going through right now?”
“You didn’t see the fucking terror in her eyes,” Corbin growls, his hand tightening around mine. “You didn’t feel what I felt when she looked up at me and was genuinely afraid of me. You have no idea what I just went through when she glanced down at my cock between us—a part of me I’ve only ever used to show her how much I fucking love her—and panicked because she was so goddamn terrified of what it would do to her.”
I look at him through tear-filled eyes. This man… he must still feel for me what I’ve always felt for him. If he didn’t, my fear wouldn’t affect him this much. I brace myself for a verbal battle between the two men, but being the amazing therapist he is, Dr. Walker brushes off Corbin’s defensiveness.
“That’s very good, Corb. That was more emotion from you than we ever got in our sessions,” he says in a way that doesn’t sound patronizing at all, but encouraging. “You’re right. I didn’t see what you saw when you were face-to-face with her. I didn’t feel what you felt. Please, make me understand. What did you feel?”
My eyes move to Corbin, who’s into Dr. Walker’s, seeming to be having an internal battle. If he’s anything like he used to be, there’s no way he would talk about his feelings with another man. He always had to be the strong one, the rock all his soldiers could lean on. Plus, we were so happy together I don’t think he ever really needed anyone to confide in. But I’m pleasantly surprised once again as he lets down his stone wall and starts talking.
His voice is quiet but intense. “I was always her protector. She was such a small, fragile little thing. I used to compare her to a skittish kitten. But when she finally opened up to me, it’s like my strength finally gave her claws. Over the two years we were married, my baby girl grew into one hell of a woman. You wouldn’t even recognize the Vi you know as the person I introduced as my wife back in the day. And when I found out what really happened to her, it all finally made sense why she had not only reverted to the fragile girl I first met in that rock gym, but fallen so much farther than that. I was always her protector,” he repeats on a whisper, looking over at me for a moment before returning his eyes to Dr. Walker. “That’s why I followed her. I kept my distance… to protect myself, I guess, since what she’d told me during that phone call had been the most painful thing I’d ever felt in my goddamn life. But I still felt compelled to watch over her.”
Dr. Walker nods and looks over at me. “Vivian, do you have anything to say about the fact Corbin kept his eye on you for the past ten years?”
I think about that isolated revelation for a moment, pushing aside everything else so I can focus on how I feel about it. “I… hmm….” I try to form a complete sentence, but it comes out stunted. I bite the inside of my cheek, feeling kind of embarrassed by the way I truly feel.
“You’ll get no judgment from us, V. Remember you’re safe here. All of us care about you, doll face,” Seven speaks up, and I can’t help but smile. I always did love his easygoing personality in his messages and videos.
“Well, I don’t feel like my reaction to that part is… normal,” I confess.
“Normalcy doesn’t matter, Vivian. Just be honest,” Dr. Walker encourages, and I take a breath, nodding.
“To be honest, I find him… essentially stalking me for the past decade kinda… hot as fuck?” My face heats. I’m used to writing my naughty thoughts while hiding behind a pen name. I’ve never really voiced them aloud before.
Dr. Walker gives me a small smile while Seven laughs boisterously. I glance over at C
orbin, who looks like he’s fighting his own grin while biting his lip. The gleam in his eye tells me he likes my honest answer.
I turn to Seven with a grin and point at him. “You! Stop laughing at me. You of all people should know I’d find that shit sexy. You read Her Master’s Revenge.”
He holds his hands up in surrender but still chuckles. “Like I said, no judgment here. And true fucking story. That book was hot,” he says, and he looks over at Corbin, who has confusion written all over his face. “Don’t look at me like that. Yeah, I read it. One, I fed her all the BDSM stuff that went into it, so I wanted to see what she wrote. And two, it’s like porn, bro, only you get to use your imagination and make the people look the way you want them to. Hot as fuck, dude.”
“I was more confused over the fact you know how to read,” Corbin jabs, and we all laugh, the tension in the air lessening a bit. He turns to me, his brow furrowed. “What was that book about?”
“Well, the hero meets the heroine one day, and it turns out she’s a professional thief. He thinks she’s agreed to a date with him, only for her to turn around and rob him blind. I won’t go into much detail and spoil it, in case you want to read it some day. But anyway, it’s called Her Master’s Revenge because he finds her after she disappears, and he stalks her for a long-ass time, just waiting for the opportune moment to seek his revenge. It’s an enemies-to-lovers BDSM romance. My first one to hit best seller,” I tell him proudly, and I realize I want to fill Corbin in on all I’ve accomplished as an author. It’s the one thing I feel confident in, the same way I used to feel about rock climbing back in the day.
But I’ll save that for another time. It’s starting to hit me that’s it really Corbin, my Corbin, sitting right next to me. In the flesh. Looking at me with those chocolate brown eyes I’ve dreamed about every night for as long as I can remember. And they’re boring into me with the same look of unequivocal love they used to—not the look of hatred I always feared I would see if I ever saw him again, knowing he believed I cheated on him.
My smile fades as it all sinks in, and I feel my breath stutter in my chest. My eyes cut to my therapist then back to Corbin as my chin trembles, and right as a sob burst from between my lips, I vaguely hear Dr. Walker say, “Here it is, Corb—” as my love effortlessly lifts me into his lap and wraps me in his powerful embrace.
That’s when I fucking lose it.
I CLOSE MY eyes and try to absorb all her emotions as Vi’s body shakes against mine, hearing Doc’s instructions through her cries. “She’s not having a panic attack like in our session, so don’t snap her out of it like I did. She needs to let it out. It’s finally hit her.”
My face twists with pain, hating my Vi is having to go through so much to heal. I nod, my chin resting on the top of her head as she weeps, letting Doc know I heard him. As much as I hate it when she cries, I know he’s right. She needs to be allowed to let everything out that she’s had bottled up for so long. And that’s when she begins to mindlessly speak through her gut-wrenching sobs.
“It wasn’t my fault, Corbin. I tried to stay loyal. It was the only thing you ever asked of me, and I failed. But it wasn’t my fault. I tried to fight, but I was too weak.” She gasps for breath, and when I start to shush her, I see Doc shake his head vigorously.
He whispers, “She’s telling you everything she always wanted you to know. Even if she had found you during her search, she wouldn’t have been able to tell you this, because she would have still wanted to keep you safe. But you know everything now. Let her have this.”
I bob my head then place my stubbled cheek to the top of her hair, holding her tight against me.
“I’m sorry I lied. I promised I would never be dishonest with you, but I lied to keep you from going after him. He was so strong. What if he had hurt you? Or if you killed him, I couldn’t live with myself if you went to jail because of what happened to me. I had to lie.” The longer she purges all her thoughts, the quieter her crying becomes and she begins speaking clearly, her voice growing stronger and stronger. “I lied because I loved you so much. And I still do. Not a single bit of my love for you has ever faded. I tried moving on, finding someone else, but I just couldn’t. I couldn’t even let them touch me. Because they weren’t you. And I’ve always belonged to you.”
If I didn’t already know Doc was badass at what he does, this right here would have confirmed it for me. I can almost feel Vi’s broken pieces fitting back together as she gets to tell me everything she’s longed for me to know. Her side of the story. Not wanting to fuck up her progress, I glance up at Doc with a questioning look on my face. He nods, letting me know it’s a good time for me to respond to her outpouring.
“Look at me, baby girl,” I murmur against her hair, but when she doesn’t move, I use my Dom voice. “Vi, look at me.” She immediately lifts her chin to meet my eyes. “First of all, none of it was your fault. You stayed loyal to me. You never broke your promise. Understand?”
“Yes, Sir,” she replies, automatically reverting to her submissive persona.
“Second, I forgive you for lying. I understand and agree with why you did it, so no more feeling guilty about that. Just don’t let it happen again,” I demand, and she nods.
“I promise, Sir.”
“Finally, I know you tried moving on. I saw it while I watched over you. And although I had thought you slept with the men you dated before ending things with them, I learned in your therapy session that you never did. But even if you had, you would still belong to me. I don’t give a fuck I’m not the only one who’s ever been inside you. Because I’m the only one who has ever owned your heart.”
I watch as Vi’s chin trembles before she buries her face in my chest. I run my fingers through her hair as she sniffles, her tears soaking through my shirt. And when she finally gets ahold of herself and meets my eyes once again, hers sparkle with happiness through her tears as she gives me the most beautiful smile, one I haven’t seen on her face since we were married.
I cup her cheek in my hand and lower my lips to hers, hearing her whimper before she melts into our kiss. It’s like the weight of the world has just lifted off her shoulders, and she can finally relax for the first time in ages.
Our passion escalates, my hand tangling in the back of her hair to tilt her so I can deepen the kiss. When I hear a throat clearing, I open my eyes to find Vi’s still closed. With one more gentle peck to her lips, I pull back to look up at the other two people in the room.
“I know we’re all a bunch of voyeurs, but maybe you two could hold off on molesting each other until we finish talking?” Seth says, a smirk on his stupid mug.
Vi’s face turns red as her eyes widen, and she turns to face him. “My bad,” she says, wiggling out of my arms to sit propped next to me.
“Shall we return to Vivian’s question before we went off on this tangent?” Dr. Walker suggests. “She wanted to know what happened to you after you got out of the military. Seeing how it looks like she’s here to stay, Corbin, why don’t you pick up from there?”
“Do I have your permission for full disclosure?” I ask my friends. If I tell Vi everything, the two of them would have to put their trust in her as well. We’ve never allowed anyone else into our circle before, keeping what we do outside the club a secret.
Doc and Seth look at each other a moment, holding a silent conversation between the two of them, before they face us once again, both nodding their approval.
“And Brian always adored her, so I’m sure he won’t care. I’d message him to ask permission, but he’s on a job,” I add, and they both agree.
“On a job?” Vi prompts, her brow furrowing.
I take a deep breath, trying to figure out where to begin. “Okay, so the day I got my exit papers from the army, Doc contacted me. He had followed my military career, impressed by all my accomplishment. My Ranger tab, winning the marksmen comp, etc. And he offered me a job. We own the place next door as well.”
“Oh, the security plac
e? That’s cool. What do y’all do, like, protect famous people who come to town or something? Are you a younger, hotter version of Liam Neeson?” She grins at me, wiggling her eyebrows above her red and puffy eyes. I know she’s still struggling, but I can see her easing into the Vi I remember her being. My beautiful wife who has no idea just how strong she is.
I can’t help but chuckle. “Not exactly. Yes, we’re available as hired security, but our main job… well… it’s….” I don’t know how to tell her without her freaking out. I mean, learning someone kills people for a paycheck… a person probably wouldn’t respond too well to that. Right?
I look up to the guys for help.
“You know what a mercenary is, doll face?” Seven interjects, seeming all too happy to spill the beans.
“What, like Blackwater?” she asks.
“Sort of. That was a private military company that was eventually bought by a group of private investors. They’re on a much bigger scale than what we are,” he explains.
“What you do… which is what?”
“Well….” I try again, but anything I start to say just sounds… bad.
“We kill people for money,” Seth says, and it takes everything in me not to jump up and punch him in the throat as Vi jerks in response. “Bad people, doll face. Very, very bad people. Motherfuckers who deserve it but get away with the terrible shit they do because they’re rich or there was a technicality that helped them escape prosecution.”
She mulls this over for a moment then looks up at me. “So you’re like… vigilantes. Y’all are basically Arrow?”
“I knew I liked you,” Seth says, and I frown, a growl starting deep in my chest. “Calm your tits, bro. I know she’s your girl. But I won’t hold that against her. She just compared us to a comic book superhero, which makes her cool as fuck.”
