Dreaming God

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by Rik Johnston

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

  I

  BACK TO SCHOOL

  TUESDAY, OCTOBER 24, 1995

  The pair of them had awoken early the next morning to go have their fateful meeting with Principal McCauley and Samuel Thornton to get Tuesday back into school. Neither Megan nor Tuesday had relished the idea of the meeting, in fact they would have both skipped it altogether if it would have been their decision to make, but Doctor Frederiksen felt that Tuesday’s education was too important to toss along the side of the road, and had made all the arrangements for the meeting, so they were practically RSVP’d as it was, even if they didn’t think he could take time from his busy schedule to be there to mediate for them.

  The morning had gone by without incident. Showers were taken, breakfast was made, eaten and cleaned up after, and Tuesday watched some television after that. She had always loved catching The Jerry Springer Show because no matter her life had seemed on the outside, there was always somebody on that show whose life had seemed a little more peculiar. Until lately, Tuesday had wondered when she watched Jerry how a woman couldn’t possibly know who was the father of her baby, and why these people had degraded themselves by having fistfights on national television. It was great entertainment though, watching low class humans sock each other in the face for the dumbest reasons. When that show had ended and the news at noon had come on, this signaled that it was time to go to the dreaded Cadence Falls High School and try to get herself reenrolled.

  It was a rainy day in Cadence Falls, and so Tuesday bundled up in her warmest hoody and blue jeans. She wanted to just get it done and over with. “Only a few more years of high school, and then I’m off to college.” Tuesday thought to herself.

  Tuesday couldn’t wait for college. Even with things getting better for her in Cadence Falls, she honestly had no plan to stay in the town that had mistreated her so badly. She had already taken the initiative to look at schools far, far away from the cold and the rain of Cadence Falls. She had looked at places like Tuscaloosa Alabama, Jacksonville Florida or even possibly Columbia University in New York, but her school record had already made that last choice practically impossible for her. She had exceptionally good grades, even if she didn’t have very good staff at her school to nurture and support her. She knew that her grades were going to be her ticket as far away from Cadence Falls as she could get.

  This was just her first year in high school, and she wanted to make a bigger impression right out of the gate. She had thought that high school would signal the end of Principal McCauley, but it had somehow managed to escape her attention that he was the Principal of both the middle school and the high school. Whether this had become a recent development or not, she had no idea. All she knew was that the many years in elementary school and two and a half years she had suffered him in middle school was the worst kind of hell outside of her nightmares themselves, now she was going to be shackled to him for a few more years in high school. The whole thought angered and frustrated her to no end to no end.

  She gathered her supplies and placed them into her backpack, getting herself ready to go. The last thing she prepared was Winston, fitting him snugly into the pouch she had made for him. She went downstairs to find her mother, who had spent the morning cleaning the house from top to bottom, at least in the mediocre fashion that Megan had thought of as complete.

  “Hey Mom!”, Tuesday called out. “I’m ready to go.”

  Megan nodded to the affirmative and put away her cleaning supplies, put on her jacket and grabbed her purse and keys. Megan locked the house and the two of them walked around the edge of the house where the car was parked.

  The old car that Megan Moxley used to get around was a beat up old beast. There was always something going wrong with it, and likely Megan could have bought four new cars with the costs of repairs that she had put into this one. One always knew when Megan Moxley was coming down the road, signaled by a series of backfires, black smoke, and a hasty dash to refill fluids to keep it from overheating or seizing. Tuesday climbed into the passenger side and struggled to get the door to close into its frame properly, forcing her to attempt closing the door two more times before it had socketed securely enough to be considered fastened. Megan got into the car, and made a couple of attempts to latch the seat belt, as it tended to give her trouble from time to time. After a minor struggle and a few expletives, the seat belt latched and she put the key into the ignition and twisted it. Thankfully, the car started on the first attempt. It wasn’t always so, the car tended to be an unpredictable creature.

  Megan cautiously backed out of the driveway, and the two of them drove to the school without any further incident. When they arrived at Cadence Falls High School, they parked the car and walked into the office waiting area, and were greeted by that troll Jimmy Waite. She wouldn’t have minded seeing Jimmy Waite if he hadn’t strong armed her and Jason during their last encounter. Tuesday was almost certain that Jimmy Waite had been sent to greet them by that liar McCauley because he knew the mere stench of his presence would rattle her to her core. Tuesday wasn’t about to give Jimmy the satisfaction.

  Jimmy had instructed them to wait in the waiting area until Principal McCauley could see them, standing at the end of the room, puffing up his chest and eyeballing her. Megan took notice of him right away and snickered out loud.

  “What’s so funny, Mom.” Tuesday asked inquisitively, wondering what was so funny to her mother.

  “You don’t want to know.” Megan replied, still giggling so Jimmy could hear. Then she went on to say, loud enough for Jimmy to hear, “Let’s just say he’s not as much of a man as he thinks he is.”

  Jimmy Waite’s face turned an exceeding shade of crimson excused himself from the room. Tuesday was becoming more and more impressed with her mother all the time. If Tuesday had known that was all it had taken to dispatch Jimmy Waite, she would have done it a long time ago. “I guess there’s the silver lining of your mother having been a prostitute”. Tuesday thought to herself, amused that Jimmy was going to be much timid from now on toward her.

  Just then the outer door opened, and much to both Megan and Tuesday’s surprise, in walked Doctor Frederiksen. Megan certainly wasn’t expecting him to be present at this meeting, but for the moment she could put aside her suspicions and work with him to face Principal McCauley, who was the common enemy on this day.

  At almost the same time, before anybody could greet one another, Principal McCauley emerged from his office and herded his three visitors inside, assigning seats as they entered his chamber. In what felt like an act of cruelty to Tuesday, he made her sit on the far side of the room by herself. Doctor Frederiksen was unimpressed with Principal McCauley’s posturing. The Principal clearly had an illusion that his power was absolute and couldn’t be challenged, that he held supreme authority over the school and any who set foot in it. They were joined by Samuel Thornton, who was also surprised to see his old classmate and colleague was present at the meeting.

  After introductions were made, Doctor Frederiksen spoke with his usual direct approach, “I’m going to come right to the point gentlemen, my patient’s education is critically important to her, and she has fulfilled what you have asked of her and sought out treatment with a therapist, now it should be only fair that she be allowed to return to school.”

  “I don’t think you’re in full possession of the facts in this case, Doctor.” Began Principal McCauley. “Your patient was expelled for acting out violently and threatening faculty and other students.”

  Tuesday’s eyes widened in disbelief of the blatant lie that had just spewed out of Principal McCauley’s mouth. She couldn’t contain her words as they exploded forth from her mouth. “Yes, there was an incident on the bus, but I was told that I couldn’t come back until I got counselling, and I have. So, what’s the problem?”

  “I’ll handle this, Miss Moxley.” Doctor Frederiksen cut her off. It was a good thing that Doctor Frederiksen was taking cont
rol of the situation because Megan felt an exceedingly cold urge to split that fancy oak desk of his in two by slamming Principal McCauley’s oversized melon into it hard, fast and repeatedly until she had achieved the desired result to leave him twitching in a bloody heap on the floor.

  “We have very strict rules about threats and violence at this school.” Principal McCauley defended his position. “Have you tried to get her into school across the river at The Devil’s City?

  That was more than Megan could take. “My daughter will NOT be going to school in The Devil’s City.” She spoke assertively, her fists clenched, ready to make that desk breaking a reality at a moment’s notice.

  “Calm down, Megan, I’ve got this handled.” Doctor Frederiksen said in a relaxing tone of voice, one that washed over her, calming her anger. She sat back in her seat waiting to see what trick the psychologist had up his sleeve. Whatever it was, she hoped that Doctor Frederiksen was able to stick it to that liar McCauley so badly that it would publicly humiliate him for years to come. Principal McCauley sat behind his desk, smiling that smug grin of his. Doctor Frederiksen reached down into his briefcase and pulled out a thick file and placed it gingerly upon Principal McCauley’s desk, flipping the cover open and thumbed through some pages in which he had made many notes.

  “It says here. . .” Doctor Frederiksen began, pulling out a pair of well-worn bifocals with round lenses and gold wire frames and fitting them onto his narrow face. “You first began your professional relationship with my patient in the fall of 1987. Let me get this straight, you’ve brought her into your office on several technically minor infractions including spilling a few drops of water on the floor from the water fountain, eating her breakfast in her first period class, for disagreeing with the Jackson girls, and several times for having a variety of reactions to her condition.”

  “What can I say? She’s a very disruptive child.” Principal McCauley stated, holding Doctor Frederiksen’s feet to the fire. “She’s always starting fights with the Jackson girls, and causes disturbances with her outbursts. This is counterproductive of the way this school should operate.”

  “What I am seeing here is a pattern of abuse of authority based upon your personal dislike of her.” Doctor Frederiksen countered, pointing his words directly at Principal McCauley as an accusation. The Principal did not like being accused of this.

  “I’m not sure I appreciate what you’re insinuating.” Principal McCauley shot back, his ire beginning to rise. “I don’t dislike her at all. I saw her at the football game the other night after I had expelled her, and didn’t have her arrested when it was within my right to do so. What are you getting at here?”

  “I am not insinuating anything.” Doctor Frederiksen pressed his advantage. “I am telling you that you are engaging in discriminatory practices against my patient based upon her psychological condition. You can either correct this, or I can give my professional assessment directly to the district attorney, where I would have no issues with testifying on behalf of my client. I also have acquaintances on the school board who might be interested in this assessment as well.”

  “Get out of here!” Principal McCauley shouted, frantically waving his hand toward the door in a grand gesture of dismissal. “Go ahead and talk to the district attorney, you don’t have anything solid on me. You’re just speculating evidence based upon your own biased observations.” He began to reach for his intercom to get Jimmy Waite and his goons to come and escort them out when he was interrupted by another voice.

  “They’re right, sir.” Samuel Thornton humbly spoke up. “And I’ve been a witness to it. You have discriminated against this girl, and I must stand up for what is right. I cannot allow you continue to do this.”

  Principal McCauley was shocked into disbelief. He couldn’t believe that one of his best and most trusted staff would turn on him like this. “You’re fired, Sam!” Principal McCauley screamed, offering threats of his own. “I’ll be putting the recommendation into the school board later this afternoon. You can pack your things and leave now.”

  Samuel Thornton walked over to Tuesday and knelt in front of her chair, looking into her eyes with a deep regret in his. “I’m sorry, Tuesday.” Sam offered, “I should have spoken up sooner. I’ve always tried to do everything I can for you, but I was just too late.” Tuesday smiled, and then extended her hand, shaking his, showing him that all was well between them. Megan’s face broke into a wide smile; she could hardly contain her energy at the idea of Principal McCauley getting what was coming to him. Tuesday was just trying to keep up with everything that was going on.

  Sam then turned to Principal McCauley, “You’ll have my resignation in half an hour.” He said poignantly, taking the power back into his own hands. “I can’t be involved with an abusive person like yourself anyway, it would be bad for my career.” Principal McCauley’s mouth dropped open and directly to the floor. Never in his career, had he ever been treated like this, not from students, not from parents, and certainly not from his staff.

  Doctor Frederiksen motioned to Samuel Thornton before he left the room, “Come by my office later, I might know of an opening at a clinic in Seattle, and I’d be happy to put in a good word for you, since you’re looking for work.”

  “Thank you.” Sam Thornton gratefully replied. “I’ll come by later and I can give you a statement regarding all of this as well.”

  Principal McCauley was beside himself with rage. “This meeting is over!” He shrieked, getting up from his chair and reaching for the button on the intercom. “Get out!”

  Tuesday reached down inside of herself and found the courage to speak to Principal McCauley. “Why does it have to be like this?” She asked earnestly. “I’ve gotten into therapy, and I just want to go to school. I want to get good grades and go to a college far away from here after I graduate.”

  Principal McCauley seemed to calm down, sitting back down and pulling his hand away from the intercom, focusing on what Tuesday had to say. “Your grades have never been the issue. You are a distraction to this student body and cannot be allowed here any longer.”

  Taking a cue from Doctor Frederiksen, Tuesday continued to plead her case. “But those disruptions are beyond my control, but I’m learning how to control it in therapy.” Tuesday explained. “If you give me an honest chance, I promise to work hard and not be a problem to anybody anymore.” She spoke in a slow and clear voice so her intentions could not be mistaken, and even Doctor Frederiksen himself had to admit how impressed with how effective her voice technique was.

  Principal McCauley slumped forward in his chair and put his elbows on his desk, burying his face in his hands. Who was he to deny a child her education? Maybe Doctor Frederiksen had been right about him and he had been abusive and overly judgmental toward Tuesday. “Alright.” Principal McCauley exhaled sharply. “You can come back to school here. Go ahead and go to class.”

  Tuesday’s face lit up as she stood up excitedly from her chair. “Thank you!” She replied, her face filled with an expression of gratitude. “I won’t disappoint you.”

  “But one disruption, only one. . . “Principal McCauley warned, a stern look upon his face, one that meant business. “And you’re out of here for good. This will be the final chance I give you.”

  Tuesday grabbed her backpack and headed out for class. She got her late slip from the office and then let herself quietly into her classroom. The first person to notice her come in was Jason Alkali, who could not contain his exhilaration over seeing her back in school. Jason tried to address her, but Tuesday cut him off.

  “I’ll tell you later!” Tuesday whispered excitedly, a glint in her eyes as she looked at Jason. She couldn’t wait for school to get finished for the day so she could do just that.

  II

  SLIPPING

  As Tuesday left the office for the classroom, Megan made a point to break the ice with Principal McCauley by thanking him for letting
her back into school. Doctor Frederiksen made no such attempt at civility with Principal McCauley.

  “Thank you.” Megan said as sweetly as she could muster up, waving the metaphorical white flag. “You did the right thing, and she’s going to make you so proud.”

  Principal McCauley sneered at Megan with contempt. “The words of a drugged-out hooker don’t mean much to me.” Doctor Frederiksen’s head cocked to the side at the mention of this, and he certainly did not approve of the Principal baiting the mother of his client.

  Megan felt an anger rising within her, and that anger had become visibly apparent as Doctor Frederiksen had taken notice of it too almost as soon as he had turned his attention back to her. He understood what a hothead Megan could be, but denied her the opportunity to lash out against Principal McCauley. “Let’s go Megan, he’s not worth your time or your words.” Doctor Frederiksen consoled her, speaking as a friend instead of just her daughter’s therapist.

  The pair of them left the office and walked out to the parking lot, Megan still spewing off under her breath about what a worthless human being Principal McCauley was and what things she wanted to slam his head into. Even Doctor Frederiksen uncharacteristically chuckled a little bit at Megan’s long string of empty threats. The rare slice of humanity exhibited by Doctor Frederiksen hadn’t escaped Megan’s attention, and she had felt comfortable enough to warm up to him, if only in this moment. How could she not show him some gratitude after he had represented her daughter the way he had? He had really gone to bat for her and hit an absolute home run. She felt that she owed him better than she had given him.

  “Look, Doctor Frederiksen.” She began, struggling to find the right words to express what she was feeling. “It seems that I might have been wrong about you. Nobody has ever done as much for my daughter as you’re doing, and it means the world to her, and to me.”

  “Thank you.” Doctor Frederiksen replied solemnly, a gentle demeanor settling over him. “We’re on the same team, I’m glad we could find some common ground and get onto the same page today.”

  “Yeah, we are.” Megan agreed wholeheartedly, feeling embarrassed by her recent distrust of him. “I just don’t trust very easily, but today you have earned mine. I’ll be sure to have Tuesday to her appointment tomorrow. We’ll see you then.”

  “I’m looking forward to seeing her again.” Doctor Frederiksen admitted, ecstatic about the prospect of what his patent was learning to accomplish. “I can’t wait to see what progress we are going to make.”

  Both nodded in agreement, and with that, Megan Moxley and Anthony Frederiksen took their leave of each other.

  The bell rang and Tuesday’s first afternoon back at school let out for the day. And true to her word, she tracked down Jason and filled him in on all the juicy details. She caught up with him outside getting ready to get onto the bus back to their neighborhood, and just in time too. Jason was getting ready to board the bus, and she almost missed him.

  “Jason! Hey, Jason!” Tuesday called out, as loud as she could, trying to get his attention. Fortunately for her, he heard her and jumped out of the line, running over to greet her with one of his big bear hugs.

  “Would you like to walk me home, Mister?” She asked him playfully, hoping that he was up for the hike.

  “Oh yeah, of course I would!” Jason replied enthusiastically, grabbing her by the hand. “Lead the way!”

  The two of them walked in the drizzle, not caring about getting wet, but just enjoyed each other’s company. Tuesday gave a feisty account of her therapy session, about how she was able to change her dream and saved the child instead of witnessing a gruesome death, and about her meeting with Principal McCauley earlier in the day, and how Samuel Thornton quit his job because standing up for her was the right thing to do. She also told him how Principal McCauley had seen them at the football game and had made the choice to do nothing.

  What Tuesday hadn’t chosen to Jason that she had chosen to take the longer route back to her house. She wasn’t certain if he knew it or not, but he didn’t seem to mind too much, given his present company. When at last the two of them had reached her house, he told her goodnight and gave her one of those luscious hugs that she craved so much. He had to get home and help his mother with dinner. It was taco night for the foster kids, and it was his turn to help with the prep duties. Another hug was shared between them, and they had agreed to meet at the bus stop in the morning.

  Tuesday turned and stepped onto the front porch of the house that she and her mother had resided in for so long, watching Jason walk down the driveway, turning and disappearing altogether as he moved up the hill toward his house. Tuesday let out a sigh of relief, thinking that things might be transpiring better in her life than they had in a very long time. She stood there on the porch, just soaking in the moment. The cool autumn rain was symbolic to her of the washing away of the past, that a new future was imminent and making itself known to her each and every day. Just a couple of weeks ago, she couldn’t imagine having made another friend, much less a boy who seemed interested in her. She didn’t even want to attend another therapy session, and if she had done so, couldn’t imagine that it would have made much of a difference in her life. She thought she would still be looking after herself instead of building the meaningful relationship with her mother that she had always dreamed of. Not everything was perfect, but her situation had created dramatic improvements over what it had been, by leaps and bounds. For the first time since she could remember, Tuesday was looking forward to tomorrow, and she felt immersed in the cool water of this new stress-free lifestyle. She kept her eyes on that road, wishing that Jason might come back for only just a moment, but it didn’t happen. She let out a soft sigh, and turned to go into her house.

  Tuesday stepped through the door into the darkened living room, closing it gently behind her. She called out for he mom but did not get an answer. Tuesday looked in the kitchen and laundry areas, but still no sign of her. She called out again, and still no answer.

  Tuesday climbed the stairs and went up to her mother’s room, where she found Megan, sitting in a corner on the floor. Her long, stringy hair was pulled forward and it obscured her face, Tuesday could tell that she had been weeping. Next to her on the floor laid a syringe, but Tuesday couldn’t ascertain if it had been recently used or not.

  “Mom?” Tuesday asked wide-eyed and quietly, slowly stepping closer to Megan. “Is everything alright?”

  “No.” Megan whispered, barely audible, wishing that she were as alone as she felt at that moment.

  “What happened, Mom?” Tuesday probed, looking for an answer and trying to be as gentle and understanding as she could be. “Did you use today?”

  There was a long pause in which Megan’s weeping had escalated into outright sobbing. “Isn’t that what drugged out hookers are supposed to do?” Megan answered, choking the words out as she slumped to the floor in a heap. “I’m a disappointment to everyone around me.”

  Tuesday grabbed a blanket as she passed the bed, and then draped it over her mother, sitting down next to her. It was clear to Tuesday that Megan had relapsed, though what she wasn’t sure of, was why. She had seemed so clear and happy just that very morning, and had done a great job of staying clean thus far. What could have pushed her to this? She placed her arm around her mother, just consoling her as best as she knew how to. “It’s alright.” Tuesday said soothingly, trying to console Megan in the best way she knew how to. “Just tell me what happened, so we can make it right.”

  The sobbing continued for another couple of minutes. Tuesday knew that she had to let her mother work through whatever it was that was affecting her, but wondered how long it was going to take her mother to gather her senses and come to a place where she could communicate. Megan kept apologizing repeatedly for having used again. “I’m sorry, baby!” She wept, apologetically repeating herself, pure and heartfelt. “I wish I was the mother you deserve.”


  “You are the mother I deserve.” Tuesday countered, trying to be as understanding and direct as she could be. “What happened to you today?”

  Tuesday could see her mother’s temper beginning to flare up, “McCauley!”, Megan roared, and repeated his name several times. “I’m just a drugged-out hooker.”

  “What did Principal McCauley do to you?” Tuesday queried, thinking that she might be on the right track.

  “Doctor Frederiksen saw the whole thing!” Megan cried, tears streaming down her face. “I tried to be civil! I tried to be nice! He disregarded me as if I were a piece of human excrement!!”

  “What did he say?” Tuesday asked quietly, trying to deescalate the situation.

  Megan raised her head up and looked at her daughter. “I tried to thank him for allowing you back into school, and he told me that the words of a drugged-out hooker didn’t mean anything to him.”

  “Uggh, he’s such a weasel!” Tuesday replied, shaking her head, realizing that this sounds exactly like something that liar McCauley would do or say. “Don’t let him get to you, Mom. You can’t let a guy like that win.”

  “I’m sorry that I disappointed you.” Megan said, said between her bouts of crying. “I thought I could do this, but apparently, I was wrong.”

  Tuesday was determined to hold the line and not relent on her mother’s sobriety. “You had a relapse.” She stated boldly and directly. “It’s not the end of the world. I’ve found my Mom, and I’m not going to give her up, so it’s time to get back on the horse so we can ride off into the sunset together.”

  Megan felt profoundly affected by her daughter’s words. “I love you!” She said wiping her tears from her eyes. “I don’t know how you have the strength to save us both, but thank God you do!”

  The remainder of the evening was spent sobering Megan up. Tuesday prepared some food and brought it to her, and then they watched television together, snuggling on Megan’s bed with the drug letting go of her soul with each passing hour.

  A true awakening had occurred within Megan Moxley and this was the beginning of her sobriety in earnest. Never again would she allow somebody to push her buttons the way that Principal McCauley had. Her daughter had demonstrated to her that the two of them could get through anything together, and now there was a fire inside of her that was ready to consume anything that stood in their way. Never again would she relapse, she couldn’t. Her relationship with her daughter meant too much to her to give it up over the words of petty and jealous cowards like Principal McCauley.

  III

  DARK WHISPERINGS

  That night, Tuesday slept seemingly soundly. She did not toss and turn, but she did dream. That night she dreamt of a taxi that would have hit a bicyclist, but she could make the bike levitate over the top of the taxi’s path, missing it as it screeched around a corner. The bicycle was placed gently down on the ground behind the taxi. The cheering throng of onlookers thought it was nothing short of a miracle.

  The next dream Tuesday had was the same dream she had previously about the airplane crashing. She found she may perhaps slow the scene down in her dream, and even rewind and replay it as if she were watching a videotape on a VCR. She could walk down the aisle, and see that it was indeed her that was sitting in the seat on the plane. Much to her astonishment, it was Jason who was sitting next to her. The two of them were holding hands, and they were praying silently amidst the cacophony erupting around them. But no matter how hard she had tried, she could not affect the outcome of this particular dream. The two of them seemed to be happy and completely at peace with one another, and the situation around them. It had always ended the same way, with the cabin erupting into flame and the scene faded into darkness. There was no pain felt, or no point of view from innocent bystanders. If this was to be her fate, she had apparently accepted it at the point that it happened, and there would be no point in denying it on the day that it came.

  As the dream ended, and faded to black, Tuesday heard a voice in her mind. It was low-pitched, whispery, cold, and guttural, and it spoke directly to her.

  “Tuesday.” The voice hissed in hateful intensity, the last syllable dragged out. “Tuesday Moxley.”

  Tuesday felt paralyzed with fright and fear, as if the voice had made her somehow unable to move. She felt icy claws upon her skin as the voice spoke again.

  “I am coming for you.” It said, and then she remembered nothing about it.

 

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