Entropy

by Addison Moore

  “Really?” She takes my hand as I pull her to her feet.

  “Yes, really.”

  Fletch maintains the conversation so good old Coop won’t feel too lonely. I slipped him a Benjamin earlier to make sure Flanders never had a dull moment—told him there was another one in it for him if he pulled it off with flying colors. Sorry, Carter, your boyfriend is all about the green tonight.

  “I’m really proud of you, Wes.” Laken licks her lips while looking right at me. If I didn’t know better, I’d swear that was an invitation.

  “Why’s that?” I pull her in by the small of her back and drop a kiss onto her forehead.

  “Because you haven’t threatened to lop off his balls once tonight.”

  “Yeah, well”—I glance over her shoulder at Coop and Fletch still head to head with their sports-centered conversation—“there’s still time.”

  “Very funny.”

  We hit the dance floor, and the first thing to move is the dinner in my stomach. Shit. What the hell was I thinking? The only moves I’m known for are the ones that take place in a swimming pool. But this isn’t water polo—it’s suicide by way of the white boy boogie I’m going to own in a few moments. I’d give anything for a slow song right about now. God knows I’m in the mood to hold Laken tight for a good, long stretch of time.

  The music shifts, and the girls rocking out on the dance floor give an audible groan before they scramble to find prospective dance partners.

  “Holy crap,” I whisper. “Would you look at that?” A smile inches its way up my cheek. “May I?” I bring her hand to my lips.

  “By all means.”

  Laken molds her body over mine, and every cell I own exhales with relief.

  Maybe she does want this.

  “I do,” she whispers. “More than anything.” A wave of pain washes over her features.

  I slipped one through. I’ll need to be extra careful with what I let her hear tonight. God forbid I replay any of the conversations I’ve had with Edinger. Things would go to shit pretty quickly after that.

  You can still hear me? I bump my nose to hers and pull back.

  I hope you don’t mind. She gives the hint of a nod. It makes me feel closer to you this way.

  There’s nothing about you that I mind, Laken. But, I beg of you, the next time you need an infusion, don’t go to Coop. I close my eyes to keep from visualizing the horror of Laken’s mouth latched onto his neck. Come with me to Tenebrous.

  You don’t need to worry. I’ve decided not to get another infusion. Her cheeks darken as if she were embarrassed that she ever did. I haven’t had one since before Halloween, so I suppose this will cut out soon.

  I can’t say I’m not relieved. I completely understand. The tunnels will always be there if she changes her mind in the future, but those will be the last words I’ll say to her tonight. I offer a shy smile, and her features soften. Mind if I show you a neat trick?

  The song starts to die down, and I glare over at the DJ, mentally imploring him to play another slow, warbling tune that Laken and I can continue to grind our hips to, and miraculously he does.

  Trick? She pulls back and takes me in with that beautiful face. I’m greedy for her in the worst way, and her extra sharp beauty only seems to magnify this insatiable ache.

  Open your mind. I picture the two of us back in Kansas outside the old barn in a pile of autumn-colored leaves—nothing but an explosion of red, the air filled with all of my wanting for her.

  “Wes!” She pulls back and swallows down a laugh. “How did you do that?”

  “Hang on tight because I’m about to do a hell of a lot more.”

  Laken lays her head over my shoulder as I take her for a spin around all our old favorite haunts. I settle us down on a blanket overlooking the lake. The sky overhead is a clear shade of vanilla. The sunlight dapples the surface of the water until it dances with a shock of lightning.

  So beautiful. She warms my chest with a sigh.

  Then I appear in the scene and hold out my hand for her to do the same until she materializes beside me.

  Here we are, right back in Kansas. Laken glows like a goddess, like a princess. She already is one in my heart.

  Laken comes to me, her body molding over mine, and we’re dancing alone in this private universe made of gold and light, and, right about now, an entire string of erotic wishes. I lift her chin with my finger and bow a kiss over her lips.

  I hope that’s okay.

  Laken runs her hands over my chest as wide and warm as the sun over our shoulders. It’s more than okay. She stands on her tiptoes and touches her lips to mine, soft at first then hungry and soulful as if she missed this just as much as I did.

  The song starts to die down, and I will for another longer, far slower song to ensue, and it does. I take in a breath at the realization that it just might be me controlling the playlist this evening. All those incidents I logged as nothing more than coincidences can now be fully attributed to my twisted lineage.

  Laken and I continue our kiss, deep in the heart of Kansas. I turn up the volume on our every sensation, and Laken moans into me both in and out of reality.

  Her tongue slips over mine, sweet and urgent. I ride my hands down her hips until my fingers hit her hemline. Laken lifts her dress just enough and collapses her hands over mine, pulling them across her bare legs, then higher still, and I groan into her. My dick perks to life confused by the dual signals it’s getting. As far as it’s concerned its all systems go.

  Laken, I love you. I want this with you. I whisper it in her ear, and she looks up at me, glowing in our minds’ eye just as alive as she is right here in my arms.

  I want this with you, too, Wes. I’ve always wanted this with you. Laken strips me clean of my blazer and dress shirt, slow and easy, never taking her eyes off mine. She runs her lips over my chest, completely engulfed in the freedom the fantasy affords. I don’t miss a beat. I pull her dress right over her head and bring her to the ground with me. Laken sinks into the grass, a brilliant shock of white over the dark, leafy lawn. Laken brings the light and the beauty wherever she goes. I lay over her and close my eyes as soon as my chest singes hers. Our lips find one another again as her body coils around me like a vine. Her fingers work the front of my pants with a fury I’ve only dreamed about. Laken reaches into my boxers, and I groan as her cool fingers clasp over me.

  Shit. I press in with hard, aggressive kisses that threaten to explode this fragile universe we’re playing in. We are the gods. This universe of our own making could be ours time and time again. With this new outlet open to us, Laken and I can fuck our brains out right in front of good old Coop any time we want.

  I unhook her bra and pull it off—nothing but sleight of hand.

  Laken presses her chest to mine, and I die a little on the inside. This is it. She’s all in—so am I.

  I’m so in love with you, Laken. I can’t lose you.

  You will never lose me, she assures. I will always love you, Wesley. Always. You are buried in my heart forever. I swear it.

  Our kisses reach a fever pitch. Laken yanks my boxers and jeans down past my knees, her nails raking over my thighs as she works her way up my back.

  I’m not going to be able to stop, I whisper, taking a soft bite out of her earlobe.

  Who said I wanted you to stop?

  Laken doesn’t want me to stop. My chest bucks with emotions I didn’t even know I was fighting. My hands swivel over her body, tracing out the curves that up until now I had only dreamed of touching. My fingers mold into the soft cushion of her breasts, and I let out an audible groan that sounds as if I’m in serious pain. I am—and it’s the best fucking kind.

  A hard tap lands over my shoulder, and I jerk because I know what’s coming. Another series of blows go off over my back until I’m forced to open my eyes. Laken pulls back, and we disconnect from our fantasy world to find Coop with the plug in hand.

  “May I?” He cuts me a hard look as if he’s about t
o beat some ass. I’d return the favor, but I kind of like having Laken think highly of me.

  “Sure.” I pick up her hand and kiss it a moment. Our eyes lock over one another, and I can feel the sorrow stretching between us like taffy. I love you, Laken Stewart. I burrow into her with a stare. Don’t you ever forget that. I look over to Coop and give an amicable nod. “Have fun.”

  I walk away and glance at the DJ. The music changes pace to some wild, raucous shit you can’t stand to hear let alone jerk your limbs to.

  Have fun looking like an idiot, Coop.

  Because it’s game fucking on, and you are going down, buddy.

  I head for the exit.

  It’s time the Spectators went down, too.

  10

  Two Steps from Hell

  Laken

  The twinkle lights blind me momentarily as I try to catch both my breath and balance after what just took place with Wes. The music escapes the speakers like a prison riot, and it’s all I can do not to puke right here on the dance floor.

  I lean into Coop—handsome as hell, gorgeous drop-to-my-knees, Coop. I feel like shit. Like I’ve just cheated on him right here in front of all of Ephemeral even if the entire exchange did take place in our imaginations. I can practically feel Grayson’s bloated boobs pointing in my direction, gloating.

  “I think I’m going to head to the restroom a minute,” I shout up over the noise. “How about I meet you outside?” It’s loud as hell, and the last thing I want to do is move my body to this musical mess.

  Coop touches his hand to my cheek and gives a sullen nod. It’s bad enough he witnessed me rocking in Wesley’s arms for the better part of an hour. That, alone, kills me. I’ll be waiting.

  I make my way to the back of the hall and barrel into the bathroom. My ears pulsate in the stunted silence. My entire body relaxes as I lean against the wall trying to cool off from the heated exchange that just took place between Wes and I.

  What the hell was that? I can’t wrap my head around it. It’s like my body was on autopilot, but deep down I wanted it, and anything more he was willing to give me.

  I close my eyes a moment.

  In all honesty, I thought Coop had this in the bag. Wes is too far into the Counts, hell, into the Fems to ever come back—but that bodily exchange, those heady kisses said screw every false belief that boy is holding onto. I wanted him, plain and simple. Still do.

  Jen steps out of a stall and averts her eyes when she sees me.

  “Wes finally let you go, huh?” She washes her hands in a hurry and walks over while massaging a paper towel between her fingers. “You know, I felt really bad for Coop. It was as if Fletch was holding him hostage. I swear, every time Coop tried to get up, Fletch had another story he just had to tell him.” She makes a face. “So how was it?”

  “Phenomenal.”

  Jen’s eyes widen. “Phenomenal?”

  “Yes,” it comes from me far more distressed. “It was surreal. He took me back to Kansas, and we sat by the lake making love.” I blush because I can’t believe I just said the words making love. It makes me feel two hundred years old, but still, I’m pretty sure that’s the right way to describe it. “I mean we didn’t go all the way, but we were right there.” I shake my head staring off in a daze. “Wes had me in every real way.”

  Jen taps the side of my cheek with a light slap. “What are you talking about? It was just a dance. I’m sure Cooper will show you a few rival moves if you let him. Besides”—her mood plummets as she wads up her paper towel and tosses it in the trash—“I heard something tonight between Blaine and Wes that didn’t sit well with me.”

  “What’s that?” My heart gives a horrific thump then stops as if it, too, were leaning in to hear whatever Jen might say next.

  “Blaine said the Spectators were being taken care of tonight.” She gives a stern nod. “When Blaine asked him if he needed to bag them, Wes said the only thing he planned on bagging was an Anderson.” Jen presses in with that wild-eyed stare she gets when she’s on the brink of losing her shit.

  “Jen, he’s a guy. I bet you, Blaine has said that to him a thousand times.”

  “It was crass. I don’t like anybody talking about my baby sister like that. It makes me insane to say it, but if Cooper is more of a gentleman, then I suggest you stick with him.”

  “It’s not that easy.” I look down and play with my fingers. “Cooper is just as much of a guy in that sense.”

  “Then how are you going to do it? How are you going to choose? You can’t just continue to date the two of them forever. There has to be one solid line in the sand, and, in my opinion, Wes has crossed it.”

  Wesley and his erotic kisses pulse through me like a heartbeat. It may have been Coop who saved me in the woods that day I first arrived, but it was Wes who I stayed for. I wanted him to wake up from this long, horrible dream just to hold him again, and now I have that. A terrible grief washes over me, a blackness that I have never known before drapes over me like a lead membrane.

  “Look”—she pulls me in, and her honeysuckle perfume wraps around me like a blanket—“there must be something really special about Coop.” She shakes her head. “I don’t know what it is, but I saw him stealing glances at you and Wes, and he was dying inside, Laken. He died a thousand deaths tonight at that table. I’ve never seen a more tortured soul in all my life. I know Wesley loves you, but it’s safe to say that Coop does, too.”

  “I don’t know what to do.” I clasp onto her as if I need her to keep from blowing away in this sea of indecision.

  “They can’t both be equal in your eyes. There must be something that one has and the other doesn’t that just makes him a better fit.”

  “They’re not shoes, Jen. They’re people. I love them both for very different reasons.” That sounded pathetic coming from my own lips.

  “I guess the only way out is to pray one of them does something unforgiveable.” That room of fire flashes through my mind, Edinger, the stone of sacrifice. “I’d hate to be in your shoes, Laken. But you’re a smart girl. I’m sure you’ll figure it out.” She fishes a lip-gloss out of her wristlet and does a quick swipe over her mouth.

  The door opens, and in walks Jax and Fallon in their matching red velvet dresses.

  “Looks like I’m seeing double,” I quip. I couldn’t resist. They must have shit an entire truckload of bricks once they saw they were wearing the very same dress. That breaks all kinds of girl code and casts a pox on your entire evening.

  “Shut up, Anderson,” Jax snipes while reapplying her chili red lipstick. “That goes double for you, Jen.” She cuts a quick look to Fallon before vomiting any more of her hostility our way. “Heard Blaine telling Coop he was looking to bag an Anderson.” She glares into my sister. “Too bad for you. Rumor has it you’ve super glued your vagina shut. The ironic thing is Blaine was the one that started the rumor way back when.”

  Jax and Blaine had a thing “way back when” and, obviously, Jax has no problem rubbing my sister’s face in it.

  Jen’s cheeks light up three shades of scarlet. Looks like Blaine just crossed one serious line.

  Jax settles her death rays on me. “I bet Coop is thinking of bagging the exact same thing—or is it Wesley’s turn?”

  Jen slaps her. A full open-palmed whack, that you never saw coming, skirts across her perfect little face, and I don’t bother holding back the shit-eating grin blooming on mine.

  Jax nurses her wound a moment. “You’re going to die,” she says it plain as fact. “Come on, Fallon. We’ve got a felony to map out. Have a goodnight, Jen. It will be your last.”

  Fallon mouths I’m sorry as they head out the door.

  I wrap an arm around my sister’s shoulder. “You okay?”

  “I’m fine. But she had it backward. It’s Jax who’s going to die.” She speeds out the door before I can stop her.

  The air outside is stilted, unusually warm with the flush of ozone scenting the vicinity as storm clouds ready to unleas
h.

  Winter formal rages on as I step onto the courtyard of Dickenson Hall and head toward the shadowed woods. A few bodies linger near the building, a set of two couples with their arms locked around one another, and, for a moment, I’m envious. I want that. Tragically, I want it with both Wes and Coop.

  Jen’s words come back to me. I’d better pray that either Coop or Wes does something unforgiveable. A rattle of a laugh dies in my chest. I can’t imagine either Coop or Wes hurting me in any way. Wes is slowly slitting the throat of our relationship with the Counts, but Coop is stealth.

  An owl cries through the damp night as I make my way to an overgrown oak.

  “Coop?” I whisper in hope he’s in the vicinity. I should never have taken my time with Jen. He probably thinks I’ve ditched him. Maybe he ditched me and went home?

  The crush of leaves disrupts the silence from just a few feet away.

  “Cooper?” I make my way over as the footsteps quicken in my direction. The music from the hall dissipates from behind as if it were coming from another world entirely, a dream. A gurgle comes from up ahead, then the distinct sound of choking. “Coop, is that you?”

  “Laken!” My name echoes from the brick walkway, loud and bold, and unmistakably from Cooper.

  I dash out of the woods and flag him down as he nearly passes me by.

  “Laken.” He practically tackles me, out of breath, his arms locked tight around my waist. “You’re okay.” He presses a kiss over my forehead and engulfs me in a hard embrace.

  “Coop, what’s going on? You’re scaring me.”

  He pulls back, taking me in under the depressed light, and his lips curve at the tips.

  “First, I want to tell you how breathtaking you are. You are stunning, Laken. You know that?”

  Something in my chest loosens, and a peace that surpasses all understanding takes over. His eyes lend me a smile all their own. His lips look lush and soft, and it takes an enormous amount of willpower not to hike up on my tiptoes and kiss them. But a very grounded part of me knows what needs to happen next.