I knew I shouldn’t be, but I was excited. Beyond happy. It seemed like he was hoping that this would be much more than a fling. Like he wanted to stick around. Like he genuinely wanted to be with me. And like he wouldn’t hurt me again.
Oh God. Please, please, please let me be right this time…
Chapter Thirty-Nine
Twenty-nine messages!
And that was just on WhatsApp. That included five from Mum, three from Harrison, plus eleven in the Roxy and Bella group chat.
I should really have kept in touch to let them know that I was okay, as it was unlike me to be off the radar for more than a few hours, never mind multiple days. But being in this blissful bubble with Lorenzo was so addictive, and I just wasn’t ready to go back to reality yet.
I sat up in bed, took a sip of water from the glass Lorenzo had just bought me and launched my emails on my iPhone.
Oh, Christ—more messages. They must be worried.
I tabbed to contacts and called Harrison.
‘Hey. Are you okay?’ he asked, sounding concerned.
‘I’m fine, Harrison,’ I replied calmly. ‘No need to worry. I just won’t be coming into the office today. I can see there’s about a zillion messages from Mum, Roxy and Bella. Could you do me a favour and just message them and let them know I’m okay and I’ll be in touch tomorrow or later in the week to explain?’
‘Sure, no problem,’ he replied. ‘We’ll take care of things here. See you tomorrow.’
Did I mention how much I love my brother? So calming. No stress. He’d handle things. That was all I wanted to hear. If I’d called Mum, she would have kept me on the phone for hours, quizzing me. Likewise for the frienmittee. Again, I knew it was because they cared, but I just needed this time. For once, I wanted to disconnect.
I switched my phone off again, put it back in my handbag by the side of the bed, and then lay back down.
Lorenzo was now in the bathroom. He said he’d take a shower and then make me breakfast. I wasn’t ready to get up. I was cream-crackered after multiple marathon sessions with him again yesterday.
After our heart-to-heart, we’d slept for most of the afternoon, but then had spent much of the night rolling around the flat. We’d started on the bed, then against the wall, on the sofa, in the kitchen, then back on the bed. I had no idea how many times we had gone at it. All I knew was that generous stash of condoms I’d packed had long gone. The man was insatiable. And to be honest, I’d never thought I had such a large appetite either. I could see now that it was all about compatibility and having that connection.
I couldn’t explain it. With him, everything felt so natural. Like breathing. With Charlie, I had to think about what I was doing, how I was feeling, and psych myself up to get in the zone. And everything was so predictable.
With Lorenzo, the only thing that was predictable was that I was going to enjoy every second and scream my head off with ecstasy. Each time was somehow different. Different in an amazing way. The attraction was magnetic. I had no idea how he did it, but he sent me so far out of my mind that I couldn’t even think straight. It was like, when he touched me, nothing else in the world existed. I just lost myself and all sense and reason evaporated. I went into a trance and lost all my inhibitions. It was like being transported to another world.
As he whipped up another orgasmic feast, Lorenzo swung his hips and danced around the kitchen to the special playlist he’d created for us, with songs from the artists we both loved vibrating through the room. This time I asked for something less Italian. Pancakes and an egg white omelette with spinach, mushrooms and tomato. He explained that Italians weren’t big on breakfast. It was all about coffee, but nonetheless, he said he would always be happy to cook whatever I wanted. Gourmet meals on tap (and all served by a hot, naked chef, I might add)? For a foodie like me, this was an absolute dream.
We slept for a few more hours, and we had another nice long talk about more topics than I could remember. We spoke about our childhoods, my fortieth birthday party plans for next year and his hopes to open a small restaurant of his own one day, and debated everything from Brexit to the salaries of footballers and if they could be justified when compared to that of nurses, and even body hair…
After our first intimate encounter together, where I had been paranoid about my overgrown bush, Pubegate with Vincenzo, and my discussions with Roxy and Bella, I was interested in his views on the matter.
‘So tell me, Lorenzo…’ I’d asked casually. ‘What do you think about women having hair down here?’ I’d said as I took his hand and rubbed it slowly between my legs.
‘Mmmm,’ he’d said as he kissed my neck and continued caressing me. ‘It is up to the woman. I would not tell you how to cut the hair on your head, so why should I tell you what you should do with the hair on your body? It is not important. To me, if a woman is comfortable with herself, with her body, then she is confident. And it is confidence that is attractive.’
Couldn’t have put it better myself. I adored this man.
I liked that our time together wasn’t all about the sex. True, most of the time we couldn’t keep our hands off each other, but I genuinely felt like it was much more than that. He stimulated my mind as well as my body.
As well as taking an interest in me, my work and life in general, he’d also told me more about his family. He had one brother. Younger. I think he said thirty-two? He lived in Singapore, which is why Lorenzo had gone to work out there for a while. He adored his mother. The relationship wasn’t as strong with his father, but they still got on. He enjoyed his job but sometimes found the hours difficult, particularly as it made it challenging to maintain a relationship with someone outside of the hospitality industry. But there was nothing else he’d rather do. It was his passion, so he did what he had to.
He lived in a two-bedroom house in a small town just outside of Florence. His grandmother used to own it, but when she passed, she left it to him and his brother. And as his brother was living abroad, he stayed there on his own.
He loved dogs but couldn’t keep one because he was often away. Like most men, in his spare time, Lorenzo enjoyed watching football and having a drink with his friends.
Lorenzo seemed very relaxed and open to talking. I really felt like I was getting to know him. And the more I learnt, the stronger my feelings began to grow. I was starting to fall for him. Hard.
Finally home. It was a challenge at work today as I was so tired. I should have just packed up and left at lunchtime, but as I’d taken a lot of time off last week to recover from my late-night sessions with Lorenzo, plus been with him all day yesterday, I wanted to at least attempt to get something done. Plus, if I’d stayed at home, I could have had one of those obsessive relapses, where I’d start thinking about him every second. Or staring incessantly at the photos I’d taken of him sleeping (no, it wasn’t weird—he was always taking candid shots of me, I liked taking pictures, and he looked beautiful, so it would have been criminal if I didn’t document something that divine on my phone).
I lay back on my bed. I couldn’t put it off any longer. I had to read these messages. And start replying.
Roxy’s and Bella’s chats were concerned ‘Where are you?’ and ‘Are you okay?’ texts, which then escalated to ‘WTF, Soph? Why are you ignoring us? CALL ME’ (clearly from Roxy rather than Bella). Same sort of messages from Mum (minus the swearing, of course).
I took a deep breath and dialled Roxy’s number.
‘Finally!’ she shouted. ‘Where the fuck have you been?’
Exactly why I didn’t want to call sooner…
‘Hold on, Roxy,’ I said, avoiding her questions. ‘I need to add Bella to the call. Just dialling her number now.’
‘Sophia!’ said Bella, answering after three rings and sounding a little bit happier to hear from me. ‘We’ve been so worried! Are you okay? Harrison said you were fine, but it’s just we hadn’t heard from you and—’
‘Bella,’ I interrupted calmly, ‘I’ve
got Roxy on the call too. Are you both okay to talk?’
‘Yes, yes, I’m fine,’ replied Bella. ‘Paul’s asleep.’
‘Too right. We’re ready to speak Sophia,’ barked Roxy. ‘We haven’t heard from you since, what, the weekend before last? It was before you were going to Charlie’s, and then you just disappeared. No text, no call, nothing. Just gone AWOL for over a week. And now you call us like nothing’s happened. We were worried, you know. It’s just not like you,’ she said, voice softening a little.
‘Sorry, ladies, I know I’ve been a bit of a stranger and it’s wrong. I should have let you know I was okay,’ I said, shuffling up the bed. ‘It’s a long story, but in a nutshell, after we were messaging on Sunday, I spoke to Charlie and told him I didn’t know if I wanted anything serious and that I needed time to figure things out. He was upset, but I had to tell him how I felt. Then, later that day, Lorenzo messaged to say he was in London because he’d come here to work and to see me. We met on the Monday night, and I’ve pretty much been with him ever since.’
The phone line went silent.
‘Hello?’ I asked. ‘Roxy? Bella? Are you still there?’ I checked my phone screen to see whether I’d disconnected the call by mistake.
‘Sorry, did you say Lorenzo?’ said Roxy, clearly shocked. ‘Lorenzo the lothario chef that stood you up in Florence with five minutes’ notice and never bothered to message you back about coming to that food festival? The one that broke your heart and that you were whining on about for months afterwards? The one that showed zero interest in you and fucks every guest aged sixty or under? That Lorenzo?’ she snapped.
‘Look,’ I said firmly, not rising to the bait, ‘I know how it seems, but we’ve spent a lot of time together and he’s not really like that. If you were there and saw how cut up he was about standing me up in Florence and everything, you’d understand.’
‘What’s there to fucking understand?’ shrieked Roxy.
‘So you dumped Charlie—no, sorry, you told him you needed “time” and then two minutes later, you’ve jumped in bed with the Italian manwhore?’ Roxy yelled.
‘Weren’t you always telling me to have fun and not get too serious?’ I said.
‘Yes, but not with him! Look at how he treated you. And from what that Erica girl said, he sleeps with every woman with a pulse. You can’t be hanging around or messing about with the likes of Lorenzo. The only thing a man like him is likely to give you is bullshit and STDs!’
‘You don’t even fucking know him, Roxy!’ I retorted.
‘And you think you do after a few nights together? Wake up, Soph!’ added Roxy. ‘I know enough about him from what you’ve told us to know he just doesn’t seem like good news.’
‘For fuck’s sake! This is precisely why I didn’t message you. I knew you wouldn’t understand,’ I snapped back. ‘Why can’t you just be happy for me? I’m a grown woman. I’m used to making decisions. Why can’t you just trust my judgement?’ I barked.
‘You might be good at making good business decisions, but so far you’re looking at this single life through rose-tinted glasses. I’m trying to help you, Sophia. I’m trying to save you the pain that I’ve experienced from dating men like him,’ Roxy screamed back at me.
‘Ladies, ladies,’ said Bella, interjecting calmly. ‘Look, this is getting far too heated. Soph, we’re glad to hear you’re okay, aren’t we, Roxy? I understand what you’re both saying. Soph, I’m kind of with Roxy on this. Lorenzo does sound like bad news. But, you’re an adult and usually a good judge of character, so as your friends, we’ve expressed our concerns, now we just have to leave you to follow the path you feel is right for you. And as your friends, whatever happens, know that we love you and we’ll be there for you, no matter what. Won’t we, Roxy?’ Bella said sternly.
Roxy let out a large sigh. ‘Yes, of course. Soph,’ she said reluctantly, like Bella was holding a gun to her head, ‘I love you. I just don’t want to see you get hurt.’
‘I know, I know,’ I said, dialling down my anger and sitting back down on the edge of the bed. Trust me. I don’t want to get hurt either. But with Lorenzo, it’s just so, so, magical,’ I gushed.
‘Oh good God!’ interrupted Roxy. I could feel her rolling her eyes.
‘Roxy…’ scolded Bella like she was telling off Paul. ‘Let Soph finish.’
‘I wish I could explain the connection we have,’ I said. ‘It’s electric. It’s magnetic. I want to be with him all the time. I’ve literally spent a whole week with him. Well, he worked for most of the day, but I’d meet him each night after work and then we spent all of Sunday and yesterday together, and whilst we did have lots of it, it wasn’t just about the sex. We talked for hours. Non-stop. He told me a lot of personal things too, which explains a lot about how he acted towards me and why he couldn’t meet me. And he makes me laugh so much my stomach hurts,’ I gushed. ‘He did so many sweet things, like massage my feet, comb my hair… he really took care of me. And he cooked the most beautiful food…’
More silence. I could imagine Roxy’s eyes rolling faster than a washing machine completing a spin cycle. Yes. I did sound soppy, but what I said was all true.
‘That’s really lovely, Sophia,’ said Bella politely. ‘You seem happy,’ she added.
‘I am, Bella. I really am. It just feels so different. So special with him. I can be myself. Everything is so natural and so easy,’ I replied.
‘Jesus, woman!’ said Roxy. ‘He’s really done a number on you this time, hasn’t he? You sound like some lovesick teenager, not the smart, strong woman I know. So go on, then. Why did the fucker stand you up?’ she snapped.
That support didn’t last long, did it?
‘Well, it’s another long story,’ I said, ignoring her insults, ‘but in short, he had to work because he owed someone money.’
‘Oh, great!’ Roxy shouted. ‘So not only is he an unreliable arsehole, but he has loan sharks after him too?’
‘No, Roxy!’ I snapped back. ‘Not loan sharks. It was his ex-girlfriend.’ Admittedly, saying it out loud did sound a bit pathetic. Perhaps I wasn’t explaining it as clearly as I could.
‘Oh, that’s just brilliant!’ Roxy replied sarcastically. ‘So he owes money and thinks, “I know, I’ll go and see that desperate rich girl from London who was besotted with me. She runs her own business, so she must be loaded”.’
‘For fuck’s sake, Roxy!’ I yelled, slamming my hand on the bed. ‘I keep telling you. It’s not like that! Lorenzo didn’t even know what I did for a living until I met up with him last week. His ex-girlfriend is crazy. She threatened him…’
I heard Roxy tutting down the phone. God, she annoyed me sometimes. This was a pointless exercise.
‘Look,’ I snapped. ‘You’ve already made up your minds, so it’s pointless me wasting time trying to explain it to you. Like Bella said, I’m a grown woman, so I’ll make my own fucking decisions. And, yeah. He could break my heart again. But you know what? Life is short. And I can’t live it worrying about what may or may not happen. What if he is the one for me? What if we do end up together? Have you stopped to consider that for a second, instead of always thinking the worst?’
‘Well, it’s possible, but—’ replied Roxy. I wasn’t in the mood to let her finish.
‘You’re my friends and I love you,’ I continued. ‘But this is something I’m going to pursue, with or without your blessing. So it’s up to you if you want to support me. Look, I’ve got to go. I’m tired and need to sleep, but I just wanted to let you know I’m okay. Goodnight.’
I pressed the end call button abruptly.
I’d never argued with either Bella or Roxy seriously before. Nor had I ever hung up on them. I felt awful, but I just couldn’t deal with the negativity. It was toxic.
I hoped I was right about Lorenzo. Otherwise I’d end up friendless—a fate which didn’t even bear thinking about. A strong woman could survive without a guy. But surviving without loyal and caring friends? I wasn’t s
o sure.
Shit.
Had I just committed the cardinal sin and thrown away years of friendship, all because of a man?
Chapter Forty
End of January already. First month of the new year, and so far, it had been a busy one.
My Christmas and New Year celebrations were fine. Very low-key, which was exactly what I needed. It was great to just sit back and relax with the family, forget about work and eat loads (and boy did I eat—I must have put on about four pounds stuffing my face this past fortnight).
I’d tried to message Charlie to arrange to talk and let him know for sure that there was no future for us, but he didn’t reply.
Sadly, I hadn’t seen much of Lorenzo. Not because we hadn’t wanted to or because anything bad had happened. Far from it.
We’d spent the whole of his day off just before Christmas together and it was magical. I remembered it like it was yesterday.
I’d woken up to the smell of French toast, my absolute favourite, and when I’d opened my eyes, Lorenzo was bringing a plate over to the bed. As always it was presented as if he was serving a customer at the restaurant. I’d told him so many times that it was only for me and it didn’t matter, but he always insisted on making it look pretty. He’d sprinkled icing sugar all over, then garnished it with strawberries and a drizzle of maple syrup—yum.
He’d put the plate down on the side table and then leant forward to kiss me.
‘I haven’t brushed my teeth yet, Lorenzo,’ I’d said, cringing.
‘I don’t care,’ he’d said, pushing his lips firmly against mine. He’d then reached for his phone.
‘Lorenzo!’ I’d said, shielding my face behind the pillow, before he’d snatched it away playfully.
‘Why do you always want to take photos of me when I wake up?’ I’d asked, pulling the covers over my head. ‘My hair’s fucked, I haven’t got any make-up on…I look a mess!’
‘You are beautiful,’ he’d said, throwing the duvet back. ‘You do not need make-up. You are a natural beauty. I just love to take your picture when you are natural. It is sexy.’
The Middle-Aged Virgin_A Chick Lit, Romantic Comedy Novel_Newly Single And Seeking Spine-Tingles... Page 33
