by Joanna Neil
‘I’d love to, but the flat is too far away from the beach for me to take early morning strolls, and on my salary as a house officer I’m not likely to be able to afford to move for a while yet,’ she remarked drily. ‘But I agree, it sounds wonderful.’
There was a knock on the door, and Julie Neville walked in. She had abandoned her white coat, and wore a slim-fitting, shapely skirt and jacket that outlined her figure to perfection.
When she saw that he wasn’t alone, she said, ‘Oh, I’m sorry—I hope I’m not interrupting anything.’ She looked from one to the other expectantly, and Sam stood up, immediately businesslike.
‘Of course not, Julie. What can I do for you?’
‘I was hoping I might talk to you about some of my ideas for the OCD unit,’ she said, referring to the obsessive-compulsive disorder unit. ‘Unless you’re busy, of course.’
‘That’s quite all right, Julie. Megan and I had just finished.’
Summarily dismissed, Megan gathered her wits and started to move towards the door. He came with her and pulled it open, so that she could go out into the corridor.
‘I meant to ask you,’ he said. ‘How is young Jamie getting along? Is his ankle any better?’
‘He’s off school at the moment, but he seems to be improving. Enough to drive his mother mad, anyway,’ she added with a faint smile.
‘As ever,’ he murmured. ‘I got to know those boys quite well when they first moved into the flat. They were always boisterous.’ He smiled briefly. ‘Thanks for keeping me up to date.’ Then he turned back into the room and closed the door firmly behind him, ensuring that he and Julie could talk in private. Megan wondered what ideas could be so interesting that they needed a head-to-head discussion.
The door was still closed on the two of them, Megan noticed, when it was time for her to go home.
Jack greeted her as soon as she arrived at the flat. ‘Hi, Meg,’ he said as she inserted her key in the lock of her front door. ‘Have you seen this?’ He held out a lighter, and her pulse quickened in alarm, until she peered at the transparent casing and saw that it was empty of fluid. ‘I can’t get it to work. The flint’s not working. Have you got one?’
She shook her head, frowning. ‘I don’t use lighters, Jack,’ she explained. ‘What do you need one for?’
‘I’m collecting them. My uncle gave me one, but that doesn’t work either.’
‘I don’t think that’s a very good idea, Jack. Lighters are dangerous, you know.’
He gave her an old-fashioned look. ‘Do you think I don’t know that? I’m not six years old, I’m ten. I know all about fire and that stuff, and you needn’t think I’m going to start smoking. I know better than that. I don’t want to get bad lungs. Anyway, do you know how to get this one working?’
‘I don’t. I really think you should let me have it. I know you’re ten years old, but it really isn’t safe for you to be playing with things like that.’
She held out her hand, and he grudgingly placed the lighter in it. ‘My dad wouldn’t mind if I had one,’ he said flatly.
‘Your dad isn’t here,’ Megan reminded him. ‘How is your brother getting along? Is he feeling any better?’
‘He’s doing OK. Mum’s had time off from work to look after him.’
Just then, his mother called him for his supper, and he turned away and trudged home.
Megan went into her own flat. A few minutes later, when she was wondering what she should prepare for her evening meal, Jenny arrived with the children. She looked as though she was about at the end of her tether.
The boys rushed around the flat, searching for things to do. ‘Me play cars,’ Josh announced, and Megan smiled at him and quickly brought out the box that she kept in a cupboard especially for them.
‘Here you are,’ she said, ‘there are a few racers in there.’
He beamed up at her and took the box, picking out a sleek gold model. ‘Brmm…’ he said, swerving it across the floor and making a noise like an engine. Josh was easily settled.
‘Where has Ben disappeared to?’ Megan asked, looking around. ‘I bought some felt puppets to show him. I thought they might be useful to get him to talk to us…through the puppets, you know? It sometimes helps when children have a problem with language.’ She wished she could find a way to take the boys off Jenny’s hands, because she could see her sister needed a break.
‘I doubt that he would play with them,’ Jenny said miserably. ‘He hardly ever plays with toys, except to line them up, and he doesn’t play with Josh. The only things he’s interested in at the moment are his toy dinosaurs, and they go everywhere with him. He seems to have an obsession about them. They go to bed with him, they have breakfast with him, they go with him from room to room, and he even lines those up.’
She drew in a shaky breath. ‘I don’t know what to do, Megan. I love him so much and I want to do my best for him, but I just don’t seem to be able to reach him any more. It’s as though he’s away somewhere in a world of his own.’
‘You’re feeling really low, aren’t you?’ Megan said, feeling a rush of sympathy for her. ‘Let me make you a hot drink. Then you can put your feet up and tell me all about it.’
She went through to the kitchen and put the kettle on, worrying about what she could do to help Jenny feel better. Jenny had always been so good with the children, but since she and Tom had separated it seemed as though she had fallen into depression.
Out of the corner of her eye, Megan saw that Ben was sitting on the floor of the kitchen, twirling around, oblivious to everything and everyone.
‘Hello, Ben,’ she said, putting on a cheerful voice. ‘Are you all right down there?’
He shrank away from her, huddling into the shelter of the kitchen units, as though he didn’t want to be disturbed by anyone. She wanted to go to him and hug him to her, but she knew that if she did that, he would start to yell in protest. She had tried to draw him into the fold on many occasions, but it had never worked.
Jenny said quietly, ‘I took him for the hearing test that you arranged, but they said that there isn’t anything wrong with his hearing. I just don’t know what to do any more.’ Her voice broke a little as she said, ‘I just want to be able to hold him and love him and make everything right, but nothing I do works.’
Josh came into the kitchen just then, and scooted his cars across the floor. Ben began to shriek as the cars crashed into him one by one, and when Jenny went to talk to him to try to soothe him, Josh began to demand attention.
‘Mummy… Knee, Mummy… Knee.’ He lifted his arms and cried to be picked up.
Megan hurriedly sent Josh and his mother into the living room and moved the cars out of Ben’s way. ‘There you are, they won’t bother you now,’ she murmured gently, and after a minute or two he quietened down. She watched him surreptitiously for a while, wondering what she could do to sort out his problems and make things easier for Jenny.
The trouble was, she had heard about children whose behaviour was similar to Ben’s, and as far as she knew there was little that could be done for them.
Jenny stayed for an hour or two, and Megan tried her best to offer helpful suggestions. She wasn’t sure whether any of them would work, and she was at a loss to know how to advise Jenny.
The problem was still on her mind the next day at work. She coped well enough when she was dealing with the patients, keeping her mind fixed on what she was doing, but afterwards, when she and her fellow house officers were in a meeting with Sam, she found herself thinking about Jenny and her troubles.
‘Would you agree with that, Dr Llewellyn?’
Heat raced through her. She looked up, and caught Sam’s gaze fixed steadily on her. What had he been saying? She mentally scanned through the snatches of talk that she had heard and tried to make some sense of it. Anorexia—that was what they had been talking about—the incidence of the disorder in middle-class teenage girls.
‘Um… I, er…’ She struggled to get a grip. ‘I wo
uld say that about one in a hundred teenage girls might suffer from the disorder, compared with one in a hundred thousand in the general population of girls and young adult women,’ she managed at last.
‘As we have just said,’ he commented drily. ‘And the number in specialised groups?’ He wasn’t giving her an inch. Julie Neville smiled archly and rested her notepad on her knee, and Megan guessed she was enjoying this.
Megan hunted through her mind to dredge up the figures. ‘If the girls are interested in becoming models or ballet dancers or athletes,’ she said uncomfortably, ‘then the number rises to around one in twenty.’
Sam nodded. ‘So, would you say that every case of abnormal weight loss in young girls is due to some kind of phobia about putting on weight or possibly a symptom of some other kind of disease, such as depression or personality disorder?’
‘Er…not exactly.’
He lifted a dark brow. ‘You wouldn’t? Would you care to expand on that?’
He was doing this on purpose, she was sure of it. He knew that she hadn’t been paying attention and he was making her pay for it.
‘I…um…I believe that some cases could mimic malabsorption syndrome…in which case we would have to be alert for other signs and symptoms. We would need to do tests for things such as lactase deficiency or bacterial overgrowth.’
‘Thank you, Dr Llewellyn.’ He turned back to the whiteboard where he had noted various headings and began to outline the variety of symptoms.
Megan subsided into her chair and felt her forehead break out in a cold sweat. That had been too close by far.
The meeting broke up a few minutes later, and she gathered her things together, bag, notepad and pen, and began to make her way towards the door. Sam stopped her and drew her back into the room. Megan felt a quiver of nervous tension. He must still be annoyed with her, she guessed, and her heart sank. Somehow, if she wanted to get through this part of her specialist training with a decent reference, she was going to have to pull herself together.
He waited until the other doctors had gone before even attempting to talk to her, and Megan did her best to forestall his comments.
‘I really was interested in what you were saying,’ she said quickly, ‘it’s just that—’
‘Please, don’t take me for a fool,’ he cut in. ‘You were miles away. That was perfectly obvious.’ His glance skimmed her face. ‘If there’s something on your mind, something that’s bothering you, perhaps you should tell me about it.’
Megan was startled by his perception. She might have expected him to believe that she’d simply been woolgathering, but he had thought beyond that, and wanted to know the truth. Perhaps she ought to try to explain herself. And if she told him about Ben, perhaps he might be able to help.
She pulled in a deep breath and might have attempted an explanation except that, out of the corner of her eye, she could see Will Sanderson heading towards them. Julie Neville was with him, and Megan didn’t think she could unburden herself under the circumstances. Somehow she didn’t think it would be a good idea to pour out her problems in front of an audience, especially in front of Julie, who never seemed to put a foot wrong and always glowed with confidence.
‘I’m OK, thanks,’ she muttered. ‘I’m sorry if I let my attention wander for a while back there. It won’t happen again.’
Sam’s eyes narrowed, his gaze sweeping her features darkly. ‘See that it doesn’t, Dr Llewellyn. Since you aren’t prepared to come clean and tell me what’s going on, I’ve no alternative but to think the worst. I shall be watching you closely. Remember that.’
Megan smiled wanly. Oh, she would. She had no doubt that she had to take the utmost care not to cross him again.
She backed away, and Will looked at her quizzically as she edged towards the door. He was probably wondering why she always seemed to be in a daze whenever he crossed her path. She really would have to get a grip on herself.
CHAPTER FIVE
ON THURSDAY evening, after work, when Megan was in the middle of doing her household chores, Jenny came to the flat again with the boys.
‘I had to get away from the house,’ she said, when they had gone to rummage through the toybox that Megan kept in the living room. ‘I felt cooped up in there and they were driving me mad. Josh won’t leave my side and Ben has taken to scooting round the place on his bottom.’
Megan pulled a face. ‘I can imagine how you must be feeling. It must be hard for you to manage on your own. Has Tom been to see them? Can’t he help at all?’
Jenny nodded. ‘They went to his place last Saturday and stayed the night. He’s been having them stay once a fortnight—his job has made it difficult lately for him to have them more often. It’s always the same when they come back, though, there’s always trouble. They’re fractious and difficult to handle. I think it upsets them to be split between the two of us. It confuses them.’
Megan finished wiping the kitchen surfaces and switched on the kettle. ‘I’m not surprised. They’re only little and any sort of change to their routine is bound to be upsetting, even more so for Ben. He’s never been able to adapt very easily, has he? I’ll make us a pot of coffee,’ she murmured, reaching for a couple of cups and setting them out on a tray. ‘How does Tom cope with them?’
‘I think he struggles, just as I do. He doesn’t seem to have any answers either.’
Megan put biscuits on to a plate and called the children to come and help themselves. Josh came eagerly to see what was on offer, but Ben stayed in the living room, lining up the toy cars on the carpet. They had to be in perfect order, not the slightest bit out of place.
There was a knock at a door, and Megan frowned. Who could that be? She wasn’t expecting anyone. Josh tugged at her jeans. ‘Me come, Aunty Meggy. Pick up.’ He held up his arms and she smiled down at him.
‘Come on, then, little man.’ She lifted him up and carried him with her to the door and he curled his arms around her neck. ‘My word,’ she said as she pulled the door open, ‘you’re growing big and strong. You must be eating your dinners all up.’
Sam, waiting outside, looked startled. ‘I do my best,’ he remarked drily, his mouth quirking into a faint smile. ‘It was my upbringing, you see. Nan couldn’t bear to see food wasted.’
Megan’s jaw dropped and she stared at him. He was the last person she had expected to see standing there.
Sam looked at Josh and his mouth curved. ‘Hello,’ he said.
‘’Lo,’ Josh answered, looking at him curiously. Then he turned to Megan. ‘Who dat?’ he asked.
‘That’s Dr Benedict,’ Megan told him. ‘We work together at a hospital.’
‘My dad go work,’ Josh announced. Then for Sam’s benefit, he added, a frown puckering his little face, ‘Him not live wiv us.’
‘Do you see him, though?’ Sam asked, and Josh nodded solemnly.
Having satisfied his curiosity about the stranger on the doorstep, Josh began to wriggle in Megan’s arms and she guessed that he wanted to be put down. She set him down gently, and he raced off to find his mother and tell her about their visitor.
‘Sorry about that,’ Megan began, feeling a little flustered about the way she had greeted him. ‘Come in,’ she added, remembering her manners just in time. ‘I wasn’t expecting anyone to call this evening—to be honest, I thought you were a hawker, selling something.’
‘Not today,’ Sam said, straight-faced. ‘Actually, I came to see how Jamie is, and while I’m here I thought I would have a look around to see if the workmen have finished. Would it be all right with you if I take a look at your balcony and see if everything’s been done satisfactorily?’
‘Of course. Help yourself.’ She ushered him through to the living room. She wasn’t surprised by his concern for Jamie. He felt responsible for what had happened and would want to know that everything possible had been done for the boy.
‘My sister is here with her two young children,’ she said, introducing him to Jenny and the boys when they w
alked into the room. Ben was still on the carpet, but now he was simply sitting and circling round and round on the thick pile. He didn’t look up as Sam walked towards the French doors, but carried on swivelling, and Megan could hear him muttering to himself, ‘Round and round.’
Megan wanted to go and hold him and ask him what was going on in his little head, but she knew this wasn’t the time to do that. And anyway, her efforts had never brought results before.
Sam looked at him curiously as he passed by. ‘Hello,’ he said, but Ben fell silent. Megan wasn’t surprised at that. Ben hardly ever said anything to anyone.
Jenny said quietly, ‘You mustn’t mind if he doesn’t say very much. He never does—Megan will tell you. He doesn’t take to people very well. He likes to be left alone to play by himself.’ She sounded a little uncertain, torn between her loyalty to Ben and her need to explain his behaviour.
‘That’s all right,’ Sam murmured. ‘He looks happy enough and I wouldn’t want to disturb him. I’m just here to check up on some building work.’
Megan went out onto the balcony with Sam. Still taken aback by the unexpected visit, she asked, ‘Have you seen Jamie?’
It was hard for her to reconcile the two separate parts Sam played in her life, both boss and landlord. It seemed as though he was going to be part of both her working life and her home life, and that was a strange feeling for her—it took some getting used to.
He nodded. ‘Yes, he seems fine now. He and Jack were full of talk about a car that’s been parked alongside the flats. They seemed to think it’s been abandoned there. Do you know anything about it?’
Megan frowned. Did he think she ought to have reported it to him? ‘I noticed it a few days ago,’ she murmured. ‘Actually, you can see it from here.’ She leaned over the balcony rail and pointed to the wide strip of land that ran alongside the flats. ‘It’s down there, do you see?’
He came to stand beside her and followed the direction of her finger. ‘Yes, I can see it. Do you know who it belongs to?’
