by GR Griffin
Randolf noted how downhill Lezard's mood had gone. His friendship was such, that the man would make the attempt to cheer Lezard up. "Here...enough talk about what we can't change." He was already pouring a new drink into Lezard goblet, the liquid holding a strong smell to it. It was not Lezard's preferred mead, being a rich amber in color.
"What's this?" Lezard asked, frowning at his goblet.
"Something a lot stronger than that swill you've been drinking all evening." Randolf told him. "Come, it'll do you some good. Might even take your mind off your worries."
"I doubt anything is strong enough to do that." Lezard muttered. But he swallowed down the strong tasting liquid.
"What we need to do is plan out your strategy." Randolf said, his brown eyes twinkling.
"Strategy?" Lezard echoed with a frown. "For when we march on Odin's holdings?"
"NO!" Randolf made a scoffing sound. "We'll worry about that at some other time. Right now you should be focused on the lady. On winning her heart, and your impending nuptials." Randolf paused to tip back his cup, swallowing down nearly all of his own drink in the process. "Now is the time. If you want Lady Lenneth's love, you have to make your move!"
"Make my move?" Lezard repeated.
"Yes. None of this taking it slow that you seem to be doing. You need to be more aggressive. Need to take her by the hand, need to kiss her senseless if that's what it takes!" Randolf used the back of his hand to dry off his mouth.
"I don't think that is wise..."
"That's your problem!" exclaimed Randolf. "You think far too much! You need to stop analyzing the situation, and give in to your feelings!" A shrewd look from those brown eyes. "What does your feelings tell you to do when you look at her?"
Lezard quickly began drinking, growing too flustered to even want to answer such a question. The strong drink Randolf had given him, went down easier this time, Lezard feeling a pleasant buzz he associated with it.
"Ah...it's all right." Randolf chuckled. "You don't have to answer to me. But you do have to acknowledge your desires. It's not healthy otherwise!"
"Randolf is right....of a sort." Sameer said, all eyes being drawn to the noble. "Perhaps you are letting your thoughts hold you back."
"I don't want to put pressure on Lenneth." Lezard began.
"But she might need it." Countered Sameer. "And you don't have the luxury of time. You need to win her over to your side, lest you really do find yourself stabbed through with a sword!" Glumly, Lezard finished off his drink, then held out his goblet for more of Randolf's special mead. "I think the lady might not be that adverse to a little...pressure."
"And what would you know?" Lezard demanded harshly.
"More than you realize." Sameer said. "I was present this morning when Mystina taunted your betrothed. I saw how her words affected Lady Lenneth. Saw the hurt she was trying to hide. She did not like the thought of not mattering to you. Any more than she liked the thought of Mystina's claims that you are incapable of love."
"Damn, the sorceress said all that?" Randolf was amazed, surely thinking Mystina had gone too far, even for herself.
"She did." Nodded Sameer. "She was hurtful, but at least that hurt served a purpose if it got Lady Lenneth to reveal some of her own feelings about our Lord."
Lezard wondered if that is why Lenneth had been so honest about her vulnerabilities towards him. Perhaps she really had been affected by Mystina's words, to the point she had sought reassurance from Lezard. A reassurance Lezard hadn't been able to truly give her. He stared bleakly at his cup, thinking how badly he had bungled things in the workshop. Lenneth had exposed a part of herself to him, and Lezard had blithely ignored the cost of the admissions she had made when he had tried to kiss her.
And yet he couldn't say if he would have done things any different. He still burned for her, filled with longing that was going unrequited. That longing manifested in the touches he tried to take, every feel of her hair a minor victory. He was greedy for more, might want harder than Hel had ever wanted for Odin's power. That want might burn both Lezard and Lenneth, turn them to ash before the dramas he had set into motion played through to their ends.
"There now." Randolf was saying, tone forced cheer. "You can work with that! Your Lenneth has needs after all if she wants to matter to you."
"Work with it how?" Lezard demanded plaintively.
"Well, for one thing, don't allow her to hide from you any longer!" Exclaimed Randolf with a nod from the others. "The wedding is the day after tomorrow. You shouldn't waste a second!"
"Randolf is right." Agreed Sameer. "You should be using this time to cultivate the relationship. To work on getting her to fall in love with you. Do not let Mystina drive a wedge between you, and most of all, do not allow Lenneth to do the same."
"But I do not know how to make her fall in love with me!" Lezard admitted, his voice affected by his anguish.
"You kiss her!" decided Randolf. "You take her in your arms, and you lay a passionate one on her!"
"Does that really work?" A skeptical Louville asked.
"It works for me." A hesitation. "Usually." Randolf shrugged. "It depends on the type of woman, really..."
"Lady Lenneth is a higher class of woman than what you are used to!" sniffed Garrant. "As our Lord reminded us, she was a Goddess once!"
"Can anyone really know how to woo a Goddess?" Lezard wondered out loud.
"No." said Sameer. "But you have to try! Why don't you start on cultivating a friendship with her. Find some common interests you two might share...."
"A friendship? Hmph. That sounds needlessly complicated." Grumbled Randolf.
"But oh so rewarding." A faint smile from Sameer. "Love will be all the more satisfying if it is grounded in friendship."
"Or all the more devastating once crushed." Muttered Louville, and the others hurried to shush him.
"Go to her, Lezard." Urged Sameer. "Talk to her. Get to know her beyond the Valkyrie she once was."
"And if that doesn't work, kiss her!" added Randolf, trying to fill Lezard's cup again. Lezard shoved the drink away, and unsteadily rose to his feet.
"I will try it." He announced. The men all cheered, raising goblets to him in toast.
"You have nothing to lose from making the effort." Noted Sameer with approval.
"And everything to gain!" added Garrant.
Lezard nodded, and took stumbling, uncertain steps past the table. No one thought to stop him. They had after all had more drink in them than was wise. Certainly none thought to suggest Lezard wait until he sobered up, instead cheering him on as he left the dining room. Lezard was fueled by their enthusiasm, taking determined steps up the stair case that led to the floor where Lenneth's temporary quarters were located.
A spring might even be in his step, Lezard propelling himself forward with the determination to see Lenneth before his courage faltered. Sameer and even Randolf's words echoed constantly in his mind, their contrasting advice playing havoc on his own thoughts. Lezard meant to do as Sameer said, to try and make a go at starting a friendship with Lenneth. But he wasn't entirely sure how to do that, his drink addled mind making it difficult for the mage to remember how he had become friends with some of the women of his court.
The problem was, those women he was friends with, Lezard had never desired anything more from them. Certainly Lezard had never wanted to love them! Free of love and lusts, it had been easy to make friends. An ease he did not have when dealing with Lenneth. The lack of it, had him pausing in front of her door, palms sweaty. At some point his nerves had increased, anxiety mounting until his heart beat was pounding in his ears. It couldn't drown out the sound of his hand knocking on the door, a loud insistent banging meant to rouse Lenneth from the sleep
she might have already taken.
A minute passed, and then he heard her sweet voice. "Yes? Who is it?"
"It's me." He said, then added a clarification. "Lezard." A long pause, Lezard wondering if she was going to ignore him. And the
n he heard the door unlocking, Lenneth pulling it open. Lezard drew in a sharp breath at the sight of her. Her lovely face, her almond shaped eyes. Her long, platinum hair was unbound, hanging down in loose waves against her back.
She was already dressed for bed, the snow white gown he had picked out for her softly clinging to her breasts. A ribbon that was a blue that would complement her hair was wound about her, just beneath her breasts. And from it flowed the night gown, the skirts loose enough when she moved, but clinging when she held still. He could make out the shape of her legs against the thin fabric, the gown a seductive, teasing sight.
"Lezard?" Lenneth's voice sounded concerned, drawing his attention reluctantly away from his study of her body.
"We missed you at dinner." He finally said. His tongue didn't want to move, Lezard barely able to form the words. "I missed you." He added, stressing his need.
"Thank you for your concern." Lenneth answered. "I wasn't really hungry..."
He had eaten his fill at dinner, and yet hunger consumed him now. But it wasn't one that food would satisfied, Lezard staring at Lenneth, starved for her attention. "It's my fault." He managed to say to her. "I...I drove you off with my earlier actions." Thankfully his brain had worked well enough that he had enough foresight not to say he had scared her. Lezard knew Lenneth would have been insulted had he implied she had been afraid of him. Even if it was true, the woman wary of his kiss.
He wanted to prove to her there was noting to fear, nothing to be afraid of. Especially from him! He wanted to try to kiss her again, and a part of him knew he should leave before he made the attempt. But that part was drowned out by the louder, more insistent half, Lezard fueled by drink and the good wishes of his friends. "I won't...can't say I'm sorry for what I did." Lezard winced inwardly, wondering why he had blurted out that he wasn't sorry.
"Oh?" That was all Lenneth said, one elegant brow raising in surprise.
"I wanted to kiss you." He admitted. "Still do."
"It is your right to want that." She told him. "We are to be married after all."
"Damn it, it has nothing to do with marriage!" Some agitation had slipped into his voice, Lezard taking a step nearer to Lenneth. "I...I want...." But he couldn't tell her how he really felt. His hands clenched into fists, Lezard staring frustrated at Lenneth.
"What do you want?" She asked.
He wanted to respond, to tell her that it was she that he wanted so badly. "I want to be your friend." He said instead. Lezard remembered saying that to her earlier, talking in desperate circles of cultivating a relationship between them so that the marriage need not be one purely of convenience. A friend was safer than admitting to anyone he wanted her love, to have it, and to give back of himself to Lenneth.
"It's too soon to tell what sort of relationship we will have." Was Lenneth's answer. It wasn't good enough for him.
"That's because you keep avoiding me." Lezard told her.
"I'm not avoiding you."
"You are!" He insisted. "Or else you would have come to dinner."
"I simply wasn't hungry. It had nothing to do with you, or what happened between us in your workshop."
That she mentioned the workshop incident was telling. "I think it does have to do with that. With what almost happened."
"Lezard..."
"No let me finish." He cut her off. "We kissed...or almost kissed. It's nothing to be ashamed of, nor should you be frightened." The blue of her eyes sparked in response to that last word, Lenneth starting to protest she hadn't been scared. "No...shh...shh..I can't know what is in your mind. I can only react based on what I saw. And what you told me. And Lenneth? Everything is pointing me towards the realization that this thing between us terrifies you."
"There is nothing between us." Lenneth said, her expression hard to read. Was she saddened by that? And was that sadness born of the enchantment Odin had cast on her?
"You're wrong." Lezard told her.
"Am I? You want, but is that enough?" She challenged. "And I? I can only feel what I feel because of what Lord Odin did to me."
"I can be good to you." Lezard was near desperate now, wanting to reach out and grab her. "I can make myself worthy of that spell, worthy of you!"
"But can you love me?" Lenneth asked. Whatever showed on his face, seemed to be answer enough. Lenneth nodded stiffly, and started to turn away. "Good night Lezard."
"No." He wasn't content to let things end for tonight, to let Lenneth stew in her own self doubts. He wasn't able to confess his true feelings, not out loud. But there might be other ways to prove how badly he needed her. "I can't love you the way you need." He admitted, praying she would understand. "But I...I can..."
"What can you do?" She asked, the look in her eyes showing Lenneth was hurt by what he had admitted.
"This." Lezard said, and stepped into the room. He heard Lenneth gasp, the woman backing up a step from him. Far enough that both ended up inside the room, Lezard allowing the door to fall close behind him. Lenneth tried to avoid him, but he was determined, his desperation fueled by the need to make her understand, to make her realize he did love her. It wasn't the kind of love she craved, it would never be able to be spoken out loud. But it was there all the same, and he could translate that love into action. Now, here.
He took a gentle but firm hold of her arms, drawing in Lenneth against him. Her eyes were huge, her alarm apparent. She started to struggling, squirming against him. It tore a ragged moan from Lezard, his own body starting to tremble. He was excited but nervous, and more than a little drunk. His judgment was impaired in so many ways, but never was his need for Lenneth more apparent then now.
Holding her in his arms, Lezard lowered his face towards hers. Her lips parted an instant before his mouth touched hers, Lenneth trying to say something. Was it a protest of his name, of his actions? He'd never know, Lezard sealing his mouth over hers. Lenneth tried to firm her lips, tried to avoid submitting to his kiss so completely. But he would not be denied, his expression of love ardent in it's need to make itself known to her.
If he could, Lezard would imprint his love for Lenneth upon her lips. Sear it's claim on her in a way she would not be able to deny, even if she doubted him for not speaking the words she so needed to hear. His own mouth was a tad harsh, making a bruising pressure on hers as he kissed her soundly. Passionately. This kiss was far different from the one he had tried to give her in the workshop. It was a total claiming, demanding she give in and give up a part of herself to the kiss.
A whimper of sound was heard. Was it he who made the noise, or Lenneth? Did it even matter? His hands were gripping her arms, and Lenneth had stopped struggling against him. Her lips were yielding, Lezard licking over the seam of them, encouraging her to open up fully to his kiss. The last of her resistance gave way, Lezard letting out a moan as he thrust his tongue into her mouth.
Taste and sensation came to him, hers. Lezard was ruthlessly plundering her mouth, learning the shape of it. And the feel of her tongue, the mage bringing his to rub against hers. Lenneth didn't know what to do in response to his tongue's movements, her owns uncertain and clumsy. Sweet in her complete innocence. Her body was going softer, Lenneth relaxing against him.
That relaxation would last only long enough for Lezard to scoop her up off the floor. She tried to gasp against his lips, but his mouth ate up and muffled her sounds. He never broke the kiss, never gave her the chance to protest as he carried her over to the bed. The kiss continued as he lowered her, and himself onto the soft mattress, Lezard's only thoughts that tonight he would prove to her with action just how much he loved her.
---
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Chapter 23 : Twenty Three
Sound intruded in on his consciousness. A persistent chirp of it, a bird somewhere close to him singing a song. What might ordinarily be pleasant, now succeeded at being nothing more than annoying. Lezard grumbled under his breath, tempted to take his pillow and throw it in the direction of the bird. But that would require more
movement than he currently felt capable of doing.
His body felt heavy, weighted down. His head felt even worse, mind sluggish, with a dull throb of pain accompanying every thought he attempted to have. All signs pointed to it, Lezard realizing he was hung over. What's worse, the symptoms seemed exaggerated with that realization. The throbbing his head was doing increased in severity and frequency, his mouth feeling far too dry.
He felt warm too, as though he was wearing too much clothing. He began pulling at his shirt, only to discover it was half unbuttoned already. He shifted, warily cracking open his eyes. Blinding sunlight immediately hit him, Lezard letting out a hiss of pain and throwing his arm over his face. It blocked out the sun, but the brief glimpse of that too blinding light had awakened him completely, all his aches and pains flaring up at once. Good lord, what had he been drinking to feel this horrible?!
Dully, Lezard remembering Randolf filling his cup with some kind of strong smelling drink. Lezard growled slowly, making a vow. That would be the last time he ever drank any of Randolf's special brew. Potent in taste and smell, it was probably strong enough to kill someone fool enough to drink too much of it. Or at the very least, kill off some much needed brain cells.
It might have done just that to Lezard, the mage realizing he couldn't really remember much of what happened after he had left the dining room. He certainly didn't recall how he ended up in bed, or why for that matter he was still wearing his boots. He felt sick and unclean, clothes wrinkled and hair disheveled. But he couldn't imagine getting up to take a bath. It simply felt like too much effort to even move. And yet Lezard knew he had responsibilities, things he had to attend to today. There was that briefing based on the discoveries Randolf had made on his travels, along with last minute details of his impending nuptials. Truthfully, those type of details were typically handled by the bride, but Lezard couldn't imagine Lenneth involving herself in that sort of manner.
