by GR Griffin
She saw startled faces in the open windows of the carriages she passed, Lenneth directing Obsidian to take a hard right. She had no idea where she was going, the only thought in her mind to stay as far away from Lezard as she could. That left returning to the castle as a no, Lenneth blindly racing down streets. Obsidian was enjoying himself, the stallion getting more exercise in the two rides Lenneth had taken with him than he had in the last five years. Lezard and his much more sedate mare, hadn't a hope of keeping up, the two thoroughly left in the dust.
It wasn't just Lezard she left behind, the busy neighborhood streets changing. She went from the shops and stalls of the crowded bazaar, to the more peaceful residential areas of the rich. The neighborhood's quiet was shattered, Obsidian's hooves slamming hard against the cobblestones. A man waiting on a squatting dog, turned to watch Lenneth ride by. But she didn't slow, letting Obsidian work himself to a lather as they followed the path of the streets, passing the occasional gaping mouth bystanders.
It felt like they could have run forever, but even a horse as magnificent as Obsidian was, was still mortal. He began to go slower, sides heaving from exertion. It was a sight that made Lenneth feel awful, the former Goddess realizing she should have been more responsible towards Obsidian's care. She wanted to immediately stop, but they were nowhere near a water trough.
Obsidian marched determinedly forward, guided by some instinct. Was he heading back to the castle stables? But Lenneth didn't recognize this part of the city, nothing resembling the buildings and landmarks that were situated closest to the castle. She was completely turned around, actually lost in this maze of a city. Obsidian continued to trot, moving like he had a purpose. That purpose became clear, when she felt the wind carry the scent of sea breeze to her. They were nearing water, and a few blocks more would bring them up to the water front, to the plank covered docks that were home to Flenceburg's ship yards.
It was busy here, like it had been back at the bazaar. The working class of Flenceburg had not been allowed the day off to celebrate their Lord's marriage like the nobles had, the men that were employed as sailors and dock workers needing the wages this and other days would bring them. Those wages didn't stop them from staring, the men standing still as she and Obsidian passed by.
The presence of so much water had Obsidian frustrated, Lenneth not about to allow the stallion to drink down all that salty sea. But there WERE water troughs here, along with fence posts to tie a horse too. Lenneth guided Obsidian towards one, the horse lowering his head, eager for the drink that which would refresh him. Lenneth would stay mounted on his back while he did this, just looking around curiously at the ship yard. There was several ships docked, merchant vessels by the looks of them, and loaded down with goods by the way they sat heavy in the water.
There was a tavern located furthest from the water, the only place where women could be seen on the docks. One such woman stepped out of the tavern, a man talking animatedly by her side. The woman halted in her tracks at the sight of Lenneth, the man continuing to talk and none too subtly gesture at the former Goddess. Whatever he said seemed to jolt the woman into action, the pair hurrying towards Lenneth, bowing and curtsying several times.
"Lady Goddess..." The man said, still half bent in his bow. He wouldn't meet her inquisitive gaze, practically mumbling as he spoke to her. "Have you come to give a blessing to the ships?"
"Here...never mind that!" The woman had straightened from her fourth curtsey. "Your ladyship must be requiring something to eat and drink, yes? Oh don't you worry, it's all on the house. Can't be taking money from a Goddess."
Lenneth wasn't surprised they knew of her, even if they were mistaken about her divinity. The entire city of Flenceburg had just celebrated her wedding to their Lord, their hard work rewarded by the coin used to purchase the things needed to make the ceremony and reception a great success. Even without a wedding, there would have surely been talk, Lenneth a beautiful woman with unique coloring all her own. The fact that she had been a Goddess? It only added to these people's interest in her, Lenneth the first Valkyrie to ever be given to make a life among the people who followed Hel's teachings.
She looked down at the pair, noting they looked entirely normal, downright innocent for ones who most likely worshipped the dark Goddess. Few if any that followed Odin, would have dared to make a home and a life in one of Hel's kingdoms. They would have feared corruption, the contamination of not only their souls, but their very beliefs and thoughts. It didn't stop them from visiting Hel's lands on occasion, the mortals of Midgard having an unspoken truce when it came to the trade and commerce between cities. Gold was gold after all, no matter whose hand had held it.
Looking at the woman, whose face showed an eagerness to serve, Lenneth did not think her inherently evil. She was probably a good woman, whose only fault lay in that she had been born to parents who had lived and followed Hel's ways. The same could be said of the man, who still wouldn't look directly at Lenneth.
"Your ladyship?" An uncertain note in the woman's voice, Lenneth realizing she had taken too long in answering.
"Thank you for your generosity." She said, and the woman beamed.
"Wouldn't think nothing of it! I can't be standing to let anyone, let alone a Goddess, starve!" Lenneth was hardly in danger of that! But before she could make known she wasn't here to be catered to, the woman was brow beating her male companion. "Ack, don't just be standing there! Get a bucket of oats for the Lady Goddess' horse!"
"Please....there's no need." Lenneth said, even as Obsidian lifted his head and snorted in inquiry. He knew enough to recognize the word oats, and at that interest of his, Lenneth thought to herself perhaps she should stay long enough for the stallion to eat some.
"It's no bother at all." The woman was saying, then all but glared at the man. "Get a move on, already!"
He never got to leave instead reacting to the sound of hooves hurrying towards them. Lenneth stiffened in place on Obsidian's back, instinct and a bad feeling gripping hold of her. Even without turning, she knew, just knew, that it would be Lezard who approached. She didn't know how he had found her, and so fast, but Lenneth was not yet prepared to face him, all her hurt and resentments rearing once more.
"Lord Valeth!" The woman exclaimed, dropping into a hasty curtsey. The very docks seemed to grow noisy, the workers all curious as to why their Lord had come to this place.
Lenneth jerked on Obsidian's reigns, feeling guilt that she would ask a demand of the horse so soon. But the need to run was strong in her, Lenneth guiding a reluctant Obsidian away from the water, the horse snorting in disapproval. But he didn't fight her, tensing to at least try to run.
"Lenneth!" Lezard was closer than she had realized, his own horse panting heavily. The poor mare was clearly not used to such treatment, Lezard having apparently ridden it just as hard as Lenneth had ridden Obsidian. The horses might collapse from exhaustion if pushed any farther, and yet Lenneth couldn't just stop, attempting to race past Lezard and his steed.
To her surprise, he took a jump over some crates, the mare being guided to come to a halt directly in Lenneth's path. Obsidian was the one to rear up in surprise, Lezard's shout hardly a calming effect on the stallion. Lenneth found herself holding onto the reins with one hand, while using the other to pet reassurance into Obsidian in an attempt to calm him down.
"Easy there..." She was murmuring, Obsidian's hooves pawing at the air. When his legs finally came back down, Lezard reached forward, snatching at the reins in Lenneth's hand. She was too surprised by the action, barely able to protest, and realizing she was effectively caught. Even if she were to slide off Obsidian's back, it would be pointless, not to mention silly to run, to take her attempts to avoid her husband to such extremes.
"Lenneth."
"Lezard..." She said back, her tone steeled to betray nothing of what she felt. Lenneth couldn't say the same for her husband, his eyes angry, his very bearing tense with that emotion. But for all his upset, there was also
concern, Lezard looking her over as though to make certain she had not been hurt during her ride. "I did not expect you to find me this quickly."
"Obviously." A terse answer. He was not amused, and that was even more apparent when he answered just how he found her. "I followed the path of destruction you and Obsidian left in your wake."
Mortified heat filled her, Lenneth actually lowering her gaze. But what was she really upset about? Her unlady like tantrum that had held the potential to endanger so many, or the fact that Lezard had caught up to her and so quickly too?
"No one was hurt." Lezard continued. "I can't say the same for their belongings though."
"I'm sorry." Lenneth all but whispered it. "I was reckless."
"Yes, you were." His agreement didn't make her feel any better, nor did the admonishments that followed. "Just what were you thinking?! You endangered not only yourself, but the people around you. Why? What possible reason could you have had?"
"I..." Lenneth gave a shrug of her shoulders. "I have none." None that she could truly explain, least of all to him.
"You have not been the same since the moment I gave you your necklace." That necklace hung heavy between her breasts, Lenneth resisting the urge to touch it's sapphire pendant. "What happened Lenneth?" Another shrug from her, which only served to exasperate him. "After last night....I thought..."
"What?" She asked softly. "What did you think?"
Now he hesitated. "Things were different. WE were different. You were no longer tense around me." The last was said almost accusingly. "I thought we were becoming friends."
Friends. The word was practically a slap in the face given what Lenneth felt for him. She didn't want to settle for just friendship, her heart longing for more. "You thought wrong." She said it harshly, but wasn't at all satisfied by the hurt look that shadowed his expression.
"Lenneth!"
To her mortification, her eyes burned. Just what was wrong with her? Why did she feel so strongly, why was she allowing herself be torn apart by both her feelings and his? "I'm...forgive me." Lenneth whispered. "I do not know what is wrong with me. Not exactly...This is not like me, not like me at all. These feelings.....they are a burden...."
"Feelings..." echoed Lezard, just as the woman from the tavern reached them. Her eyes were burning with a gleeful curiosity, and she wasn't the only one. The workers were all standing around, avid interest on their face as they blatantly stared at Lezard and Lenneth, Her face grew hotter yet, Lenneth wondering how much they had heard, and just how much they had understood of what had been said.
"Lord Valeth, Lady Goddess. Please...your horses are in need of a rest. Come, wait in the tavern while they recover."
Lezard and Lenneth exchanged a look, both knowing it was the truth that the woman spoke of. "All right." Lezard said, but didn't let go of Obsidian's reins. It was as though he didn't trust Lenneth not to bolt the second he let go, and it hurt her that she had driven him to that point of mistrust.
With Lezard in the lead, the horses were brought over to the water trough. The tavern woman immediately began barking orders, men hurrying to tie the horses to the post, and to fetch the oats she had offered Obsidian earlier.
Lezard and Lenneth slipped off their mounts' back at roughly the same time. Lenneth lingered by Obsidian long enough to give him one last pat, and then allowed Lezard to grip her hand. The woman led them to the tavern, chattering a mile a minute.
"You came at a good time." She was saying. "The lunch rush has just ended." The tavern was indeed empty save for two men not dressed in the dock worker's uniform. The woman nodded at them, smiling. "Jospeh and Yolaf. Two of my best customers."
"That's because you make the best lamb in all of Flenceburg." One of the men said.
The other raised his mug, toasting the tavern woman. "Not to mention you serve the cheapest ale!"
The tavern woman gave the second man an annoyed look, clearly not liking that cheap comment. "Cheap only in price, not in quality, I guarantee you, your Lordship!" She said to Lezard, guiding him and Lenneth to a table. It was no coincidence she sat them near the kitchen, this woman blatantly obvious that she felt entitled to eavesdrop on their conversation.
"I'll have some of that lamb heated up and ready to serve in just a few minutes." She was promising, curtseying once more.
"Thank you uh..."
"Richelle." She said, all too glad to supply her name.
"Yes, Richelle...thank you." Lezard said, and the silence that followed was pointed. He was making it known the conversation would not start until Richelle stepped away from the table. She wasn't as disappointed as she could be, Richelle hurrying to the kitchen. No doubt one ear would be turned to the door, Richelle intent on hearing as much of Lezard and Lenneth's conversation as she could.
They wouldn't make it easy for her, speaking in low voiced murmurs. "You said feelings..." Lezard began, and Lenneth slowly, hesitantly nodded. "Is it the enchantment?"
"I..." A shake of her head, Lenneth despairing. "I do not....it can't be all the enchantment's fault! I am feeling things, feelings that have nothing to do with the love it tries to force on me. The ride today, my anger at you...."
"At me?" This anger was clearly a surprise to him by the startled look on his face.
"I was angry by your concern, by how you seemed to disregard my skill at handling Obsidian." That wasn't all she had been angry about, but it was all Lenneth could admit to at this point. "It made me lash out." She lowered her gaze, ashamed once more. "I was like a child throwing a tantrum. And that is NOT like me! Not like me at all!"
The table has scarring on it's wood, someone having carved their initials into it's surface. She traced the initials with her fingers now, Lenneth troubled. "I've never been prone to anger...at least...not anger of such an irrational kind. These feelings....all of them...they are all so new to me. New and mostly unwanted! They are making me act and say things...behave in a way most unbecoming." They made her want things she couldn't have, Lenneth's heart seeming to clench in pain.
"It is exhausting." She continued, confiding in her husband. "I don't know how you mortals have not gone mad from the depths of the feelings you go through on a daily basis."
"I'm sorry." Lezard hand was covering hers, Lenneth's fingers stilling on the carving. "I had no idea...."
"You had to have some." Lenneth insisted, meeting his gaze. "It's not natural for a Valkyrie, even a disgraced one, to go on and on about love and the need for it."
"Valkyrie or no, you are still a woman at heart."
That proved he still didn't understand, Lenneth pulling her hand out from under his. "I am mortal now....human....I don't think either one of us truly appreciate what that means...Your kind feels so much more, with an intensity that is almost unrivaled against the other beings of Creation. Short lived though you may be, you cram so many experiences and emotions into your brief lives. I suppose it's meant to make your kind fulfilled, but I? It is unwanted, a burden to someone who has spent eternity cold and rational!"
"Feelings don't necessarily have to make one irrational." Argued Lezard. "Nor are they particularly bad..."
She practically scoffed in response, Lenneth giving a terse shake of her head no. "If I had behaved on the battlefield like I had today? Giving in to my anger, rushing headfirst into danger? I would have surely been killed or worse! I was reckless...a danger to myself as well as to others...I am embarrassed by my behavior...by the trouble I've caused you."
"Lenneth, you have yet to cause me any true trouble." Reassured Lezard. This time she did scoff, the sound full of her disbelief. He gave a small smile back, and continued attempting to reassure her. "You frightened me more than anything today...."
"I don't just speak about today." Lenneth said. "When I think about how I've gone on and on, about my feelings....about what I would have from you..."
"You are well in your rights to want that." Lezard quickly said.
"I'm sure it is a problem you haven't wanted." Lenne
th insisted. "To deal with some overly needy female, with her wants and hurt feelings. I'm sure you expected better."
"I wasn't sure what to expect when getting a Valkyrie for my bride." Lezard told her. "But I find myself liking the feeling woman you are becoming. A lot more than I would have like some cold, dispassionate Goddess!"
He was reaching for her hand, but Lenneth wasn't ready to accept what he was telling her. "Without these feelings getting in the way...you wouldn't have had to go unfulfilled on your own wedding night." He had frozen at that, his expression looking very much shocked by what she had said. She felt her own shock, mortified heat making her feel too warm, her clothing even more tight and restricting than they had been previously. "It's the truth." She insisted, hiding her own embarrassment behind her defensiveness. "What you wanted to do...what you required of me...it wouldn't have mattered anywhere as much as it does, as I am making it to be!"
She watched him open and close his mouth several times, Lezard doing a hard swallow. He seemed speechless, as though she had shocked him to the point he knew not what to say to her. The silence was almost unbearable, but nowhere near as hurting as it would have been should he have tried to reassure her. To hear him gently insist that last night had happened the way he would have wanted, to hear him claim he was happy to have spent the night just talking to her, it very well might have drawn a scream from Lenneth. No man could be happy to lose out on his marriage bed rights, especially a man who desired his wife as much as Lezard clearly desired Lenneth.
"The act doesn't need to mean more than I am making it to mean!" She continued, stumbling, practically babbling her way to further embarrassments. "I should be able to distance my heart and my head, I shouldn't let any feelings impede me in my duty to you!"
He was still just staring at her, Lezard unable or unwilling to speak. Lenneth came away with the feeling she was truly a disgrace, burdening him even further with talking about this. "When I wed you...I made a promise. I spoke vows to you. I am not living up to them. But I cannot be...as cold about this as you, as unfeeling about this duty that is expected of me."
