Pete laughed with his brother, but Jake’s words only increased the feeling that something wasn’t right.
“Do you think it’s the pregnancy? None of us knows much about that, even if we did read a book.”
Pete could feel Jake’s eyes on him, and he wished he had an answer. But he didn’t. “I don’t know. There wasn’t anything in the book about someone losing herself…changing into another person. If anything, the book said the mother might get difficult, fussy.”
“And she doesn’t get that way when it’s just the two of you? I’d wondered if living with all of us was too big a strain.”
“No, it’s not that. We don’t talk when it’s just the two of us. She goes up early. When I come up, she’s ready to lure me into bed.” He laughed self-consciously. “Not that she has to try very hard.”
“Maybe you should ask her what’s wrong.”
Pete’s cheeks heated up in the cold air. “I’ve considered that, but the minute I enter the room, my hormones go into overdrive. She even had a new nightgown last night. Some rosy pink thing that was made of a few ribbons and some sheer material.” Pete shuddered just thinking of her appearance and his enthusiastic removal of the aforementioned garment.
“I don’t know what to tell you, Pete,” Jake said, frowning. “Maybe you need to talk to Megan or Lavinia.”
Pete stared at his brother in horror. “You want me to tell Lavinia about my sex life with her daughter? Or Megan? Are you crazy?”
Jake laughed. “Sorry. I guess I wasn’t thinking. But I don’t know what to do to help you.”
Jake smiled at his brother. “Don’t worry about it, Jake. You can’t take care of all our problems for us. I’ll work it out…one way or another.”
THAT NIGHT, Pete watched Janie slip away from the group and start up the stairs. Her steps seemed slower, her tread heavier, than in the past few days. He’d started to ask her several times if she was feeling all right, but in the past she’d always gotten irritated when he worried about her.
Reaching a sudden decision, he broke off the conversation he was having with Brett and got to his feet.
“What’s wrong?” Brett asked in surprise.
“Nothing. I have to go upstairs.”
Brett grinned. “Are you sure you’re leaving her enough time to breathe?”
“What are you talking about?”
“Well, I’ve heard of nonstop sex, but I’ve never seen it in action before. You don’t hardly let her out of your sight.”
Pete started to sit back down, afraid Brett was right, that he’d been hounding Janie. Then he remembered that she’d been seducing him. “No, that’s not it,” he said distractedly, and headed for the stairs.
And it wasn’t. He wasn’t an animal. He could control his desires…he thought. He’d been prepared to do so when Janie had agreed to marry him. No, it was as he’d told Jake earlier. Something was wrong.
He hoped if he went up when she did, before she transformed herself into his very own painted lady, he could control his hormones and get her to talk to him. Talk had been in short supply lately, at least between the two of them.
Opening the door cautiously, he discovered Janie curled up into a little ball on the far side of the bed.
“Janie? Janie, are you all right?” he asked as he crossed the room and knelt down beside her.
She hid her face from him. “Go away.”
He felt her face and found it warm to his touch. “Janie, are you running a fever?”
“No. Go away,” she repeated.
“Janie, look at me,” Pete commanded sternly. “I need to know if you’re sick.”
“I’m not sick. But I’m not interested in sex tonight, so you might as well go away. I’ll sleep in the other room if you want.”
She uncovered her face enough for Pete to see tears streaking down her cheeks.
“Why would you do that?” he asked, fear clutching his heart. “We’ve been sharing this bed for a while now. There’s no reason we can’t continue.”
“Yes, there is!” she exclaimed, her voice breaking at the end.
Pete rolled back on his heels, staring at her. “What reason?”
“I can’t keep this up.”
“Keep what up? Janie, are you talking about our marriage? You’re not thinking of leaving?” He couldn’t keep the horror out of his voice. “You’re not leaving, Janie.” He may have missed the old Janie, but he wasn’t letting either one of them go without a fight.
“Why not?” she cried. “You won’t want me anymore.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Later,” she said with a sniff. “You won’t want me later.”
“Janie, you’re not making any sense.”
She sat up on the bed, a look of determination coming over her. “Yes, I am. You just won’t admit it. And I’m not waiting around for it to happen.” She rolled away from him to the other side of the bed, stood up and ran for the door.
“Janie, what the hell are you talking about?” he shouted, springing to his feet to chase after her. “What is it?”
“You don’t love me, and I can’t always be young and attractive,” she wailed over her shoulder.
She reached the stairs while she was answering Pete’s question and missed the first step. In horror, Pete watched her fall, as if in slow motion, and roll down the stairs.
“Janie!” Fear filled him as he raced down after her.
She lay silent on the floor.
The rest of the family came running out at the commotion.
“Janie,” Pete crooned, lifting her up against his chest. “Janie, talk to me.”
Jake snapped out orders. “Brett, call the doc. Chad, go get B.J.”
“B.J.?” Chad asked. “She’s an animal doctor.”
“She’s also the only female to have had a baby around here. Go get her.” Then he turned his attention to Pete and Janie. “Did she break anything?”
Pete stared at him, a dazed look in his eyes.
Jake ran his hands over Janie’s arms and legs. “Nope, I don’t think so.”
Pete held his wife against him, as if trying to share his strength with her. He didn’t even notice the others around him.
“Pete, can you carry her to bed? With nothing broken, I think it will be okay to move her.” Jake had to tell him a second time, but finally Pete heard him.
“I can carry her,” he assured him gruffly, trying to hold back the tears that filled him. He couldn’t bear the thought of Janie hurt.
He stood and lifted Janie high against his chest. With Jake at his back, as if offering support, he started up the stairs.
“Megan,” Jake called over his shoulder, “as soon as Brett finishes talking to the doctor, maybe you’d better call Lavinia and Hank.”
Jake hurried around Pete and his burden to strip back the covers on their bed. “We’d better keep her warm. She might go into shock.”
Pete laid her down, reluctant to let go of her. He had the feeling that as long as he held her, she would be okay.
“Pete, you want to take off her shoes?”
He turned to stare at Jake, a blank look on his face. What had Jake said?
“Her shoes, Pete. Take off her shoes.”
He did so and then drew the covers over Janie just as the bedroom door opened. B.J., with Chad right behind her, came into the room.
“How is she?”
“She hasn’t regained consciousness yet,” Jake said in a low voice.
B.J. gently moved Pete aside and felt Janie’s pulse. Then she opened one of her eyes. After that, she gently patted Janie’s cheek. “Janie? Janie, can you hear me?”
Pete wanted to protest. But Janie’s groaned response stopped him. He pushed closer. “Janie? Are you okay? Janie, speak to me.”
“My head,” she said with a low moan.
“Doc Jacoby is on his way, Janie,” B.J. assured her calmly. “Just lie still and rest.”
Janie clutched her stomach instead
. “Ooh!”
“Are you having pains, Janie?” B.J. asked, her voice again calm.
“My babies!” Janie cried, sending a chill through the room.
PETE PACED THE FLOOR, unable to contain himself. Doc, Lavinia and B.J. had been upstairs with Janie for at least half an hour. The fear that he might lose her so consumed him that he didn’t hear footsteps coming down the stairs.
Perhaps it was the concerted movement of the rest of his family that alerted him. By the time he turned around, Doc was almost to the bottom.
“Janie…?” he asked painfully.
“She’s going to be fine. She has a mild concussion, and there will be an assortment of bumps and bruises, but nothing serious.”
Pete bowed his head in relief.
“And the babies?” Jake asked softly.
Pete’s head snapped up in time to see the doctor let out a long sigh. “I don’t know. We’ll know more after twenty-four hours.”
“You mean she might lose the babies?” Pete asked in horror.
“I hope not. Babies are well cushioned. But I’m not promising anything right now. Lavinia is going to stay with her tonight. I’ll be out first thing in the morning to check her again.”
“You’re not moving her to a hospital?” Jake asked.
“Nope. Lavinia is almost as good as Priddy. Janie will be better off here.” He turned to Pete again. “You can go see her for a minute or two, but don’t upset her.”
Uncertainty and fear filled him. He was the reason she’d fallen in the first place. He’d already upset her. What if the sight of him disturbed her all over again?
With a nod to the doctor, he started up the stairs. He couldn’t not see her. He had to see with his own eyes that she was all right. But he was afraid his presence wouldn’t make her feel better.
“Lavinia?” he whispered from the door to the bedroom. “Doc said I could see her for a minute or two.”
She motioned for him to come in. “Janie, Pete’s here to see you.”
Even Pete, from across the room, could see her body flinch at her mother’s words. He and Lavinia exchanged looks of concern, but he walked to Janie’s bedside.
“Sweetheart, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to argue with you.” He could feel Lavinia’s gaze on him, but it was no time to be dishonest. “I’ll do whatever you want, I promise.”
Even if it meant watching her leave. He wanted her—forever—but most of all, he wanted her safe and happy. Even if she went away. Or married someone else. But the thought of it was tearing him in two.
He brushed her lips with his, gently, softly, and then, without another word, left the room.
BY THE NEXT EVENING, Doc assured Pete the babies were fine, as would be Janie after some rest. While the relief was incredible, Pete’s heart was heavy.
He was sure Janie intended to leave. She’d asked her mother to stay another night with her, after the doctor refused to allow her to go back to her parents’ home.
He visited Janie once that evening, but she scarcely responded to him. As he left the room, Lavinia gave him a sad smile.
Yes, Janie was leaving.
“YOU CAN’T GO without telling him why,” Lavinia said, frustration in her voice. “Janie, the man has been distraught with worry. He cares about you.”
“He cares about his babies,” Janie replied softly, one hand cradling her stomach. The scare she’d received, endangering her babies’ lives, had made them so much more precious. And helped her make some decisions.
Unfortunately her mother was right. She couldn’t leave Pete without telling him…without assuring him of a role in his children’s lives.
“All right, Mom. We’ll wait for him to come back.”
“He’s downstairs in the kitchen right now.”
“He didn’t ride out today?”
“Of course not. He’s waiting to do whatever he can to help you.”
Janie’s eyes filled with tears, and she turned away. “Ask him to come up.”
She moved to the window, hoping the bright winter sun would dry out her eyes. Reminded of that first meeting with Pete after she’d found out she was pregnant, Janie dug deep for the control she’d had then. She refused to let Pete know how painful this meeting would be for her.
“Janie.”
That low, sexy voice that thrilled her announced Pete’s arrival.
She didn’t turn around. “Pete, I’m going back home.”
Silence greeted her announcement, but she didn’t realize he’d moved until his hands fell on her shoulders and gently turned her around. “Why?”
She wasn’t prepared to answer that question. “I won’t keep you from seeing the babies or—or being their daddy.”
“Why, Janie? Is it Manning?”
That question brought her gaze to his, filled with indignation. “Of course not!”
“Then why can’t you stay? Why can’t you let me take care of you? I’ll sleep on the daybed if you want.”
She ducked her head. “Pete, I can’t continue to—I’d be living a lie.”
“You once said you loved me.”
Her heart contracted in pain. Once? She would always love this stubborn man. “Yes,” she whispered.
“Janie, I’ll try harder. I’ll do whatever you want,” he pleaded softly. “Give me another chance.”
The tears reappeared, and she gasped, trying to hold them back. “Pete, it’s me, not you.”
He lifted her chin, staring at her, a frown on his face. One tear escaped and traveled down her cheek, and he erased it with his thumb. “What are you talking about, Janie?”
She tried to turn away, but he wouldn’t let her. Finally she lifted her gaze to his and told him the truth.
“I tried to be sexy,” she explained with a hiccup, “but I can’t hold you with sex the rest of my life. I won’t always be attractive or young. And I can’t live with the fear that you’ll find someone else who is.”
As if they were frozen in a lovers’ tableau, they stood there, Pete’s arms around her, their faces lifted to each other. Suddenly Pete lifted her in his arms and spun around.
“Dear God, give me strength,” she heard him mutter.
“Pete, what are you doing?” she shrieked.
“Sorry, sweetheart, I forgot about your concussion,” he muttered as he set her back down on her feet. Then, to her surprise, he tried to kiss her.
She shoved him away. “Pete, I’m leaving, remember?”
“Nope. Not in a million years.”
“Pete Randall, you can’t order me around. I’ll do. what I jolly well please, and you can just—”
He threw back his head in laughter, and she stared at him in surprise. Had he gone crazy?
“That’s my Janie,” he said as he chuckled. “I’ve missed you so much.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Janie, the sex has been incredible these last few days—”
“I know, Pete, but I can’t—”
“Would you let me finish?”
Irritation rose at his high-handedness, but she nodded grudgingly.
“Since when did I ever need seducing?” he asked, a grin on his face.
“When you began losing interest.”
He looked as if she’d poleaxed him. “What?”
“You stopped wanting me all the time.”
“Janie Dawson Randall, I have never stopped wanting you every minute of every day since the first time I made love to you. And I never will.”
“What about the day we bought the computer?”
He shook his head in bewilderment. “What about it?”
“You acted like you wanted to make love to me before we left for shopping.”
“I did. That doesn’t prove I don’t want you.”
“But you didn’t.”
“You said I’d mess up your makeup!” he exploded.
“Such a silly excuse wouldn’t have stopped you in the past. And—and…” She paused to restrain her tears. “And yo
u were friendly with Bryan.”
He leaned his forehead against hers. “Are you out of your mind, Janie? Do I have to punch out every man who even looks at you for you to believe I want you?”
She buried her face in his chest. “It doesn’t matter, Pete,” she said wearily. “I won’t always look this way. Someone younger, prettier, will come along. I’m not strong enough to face that.”
“Janie,” Pete whispered, raising her head again, “I think I forgot to tell you something.”
She blinked several times, wanting to ask if he’d already found someone else, but she couldn’t bring herself to do so.
“What?”
“I forgot to tell you that I love you.”
She stared at him. The words she’d always wanted to hear were now impossible to believe. “Pete, please—”
“Janie, I’ve always loved you. Only you. But at first, I was afraid to tell you, afraid to admit how much I needed you. Then, after we married, you seemed…unhappy with me. I realized how much I loved you, but I thought I had to—to woo you back. To convince you to love me again. So I was trying to do whatever would make you happy.” He grinned. “Like spend all afternoon using that stupid computer.”
“You didn’t like it?” she asked, distracted by his hands. They were stroking her back in a rhythmic pattern.
“I hated it. I know computers are good, but I won’t want to mess with them. I’d rather my wife take care of that end of our business.”
“I could do that but, Pete—”
His lips covered hers before she could finish. The magic of his touch was still there even when she thought she was leaving him. When he lifted his mouth from hers, she tried again. “Pete, I’m not sure—”
He kissed her again.
This time he spoke. “I’m sure, Janie. I’m sure with all my heart. There will never be anyone else to tempt me. And I don’t need a sexy lady every night. Even a crabby Janie will do me.”
“Are you sure, because I can’t—”
He silenced her with his lips. “I missed you, sweetheart.”
“What?”
“The last few days, I knew you weren’t being yourself. I wanted to argue with you just to find the old Janie. But every time I opened the bedroom door, well, other parts of me took over.”
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