by Isobel Bird
Is that what he’s doing now? she asked herself. Was he trying to somehow get back together with her by encouraging her to join the Coven of the Green Wood? Or did he really mean it when he said that they would be able to work together without there being any tension between them? And even if he meant that, was it true? Could she indeed work in the same coven as Tyler and be able to focus on her magic?
She sighed deeply. Who would have thought that the biggest problem about becoming a witch would be deciding whether or not to join your ex-boyfriend’s coven? she thought. If she’d been asked to list the major obstacles to choosing a coven a year ago, that one would have been way down on her list. Now, though, it was a definite issue. She liked the members of the Coven of the Green Wood. She’d enjoyed the rituals she’d done with them. If she and Tyler were still together, it probably would be high on her list of potential covens. But was it still high on the list? Was it even on the list? She wasn’t sure.
The phone rang again and she picked it up.
“Can I just tell you what a genius you are?” Annie said, sounding very pleased.
“I take it you’ve heard about the wedding plans,” said Kate. “You’re okay with the Caterpillar thing?”
“Well, I had had my heart set on a lacy Victorian dress,” Annie said. “But something with twelve feet is just as good. Or are they arms? I’m not sure. And are there twelve? Maybe there are twenty, or fifty. I should look this up.”
“Well, I’m glad you’re so into it,” Kate said.
“You don’t sound too glad,” said Annie.
“It’s not that,” said Kate. “It’s Tyler,” she added, realizing too late that the last person she wanted to be talking about Tyler to was Annie. It had been Tyler’s cheating with Annie that had precipitated their breakup in the first place.
“Oh,” Annie said in a quiet voice.
“I’m sorry,” Kate said. “I shouldn’t have said anything. It’s just that I just hung up from talking to him and it was kind of on my mind.”
Annie hesitated. “Do you want to talk about it?” she asked cautiously.
Kate almost said no, but then she hesitated. She and Annie had been keeping the subject of Tyler buried pretty deeply. But maybe it was time they stopped doing that. After all, Annie was one of her best friends. And Tyler was a factor in Kate’s decision about which coven she should join. Maybe talking about it with Annie would help.
“Yes,” Kate said, deciding that it was time the two of them moved beyond the painful events that had come between them. “I do want to talk about it.”
CHAPTER 4
Cooper was ten minutes late getting to the restaurant. She had spent the afternoon at Jane’s house, rehearsing songs for their upcoming show at Black Eyed Susan’s. Despite agreeing to do the gig, Cooper had still been a little hesitant. But after working through a couple of songs with Jane, she felt a lot better. The lyrics and their playing were really coming together, and Cooper had become so wrapped up in the music that she had lost all track of time. When she’d finally glanced at a clock, it had been ten minutes to seven. Even though she’d driven over as quickly as she could, she was still late, and she knew her father hated it when people were late. So much for a good first impression, she thought, then immediately wondered why she was worried about making a good impression on her father’s date. Shouldn’t the woman be worried about impressing her?
She walked into Shiva’s Garden and looked around. The restaurant was unusual in that it had been designed to look like an enormous, overgrown garden. Potted trees and plants were everywhere, and the tables were tucked between them, making it difficult to see who was there. Normally that was part of the appeal for Cooper, but now she found it irritating as she tried to locate her dad. Finally she spotted him, at a table near the back.
“Sorry I’m late,” she said as she made her way through the plants and reached the table. Seeing that her father was alone, she added, “Where’s the lucky lady?”
Mr. Rivers smiled. “She had to take a phone call,” he said. “Apparently they don’t take too kindly to cell phones in here, so she went out onto the patio. She’ll be back in a minute.”
“A cell phone call,” said Cooper, pulling out a chair across from her father and sitting down. “Sounds very busy and important.”
Mr. Rivers raised an eyebrow. “Getting sarcastic already?” he asked.
Cooper gave him an innocent look. “Who, me?” she said.
Her father laughed. “Don’t be too rough on her when she gets here,” he said. “She’s a nice lady.”
“I’ll be on my best behavior,” said Cooper. “I promise.”
She picked up the water glass sitting beside her plate and took a sip. The truth was, she was sort of intrigued to see what kind of woman her father would ask out on a date. It was difficult for Cooper to imagine him with anyone but her mother. Would this woman look like her? Would she be the same type of person? Probably not, Cooper told herself. If she was, he might as well have just stayed married to Mom.
“I know this is a little weird,” Mr. Rivers said.
“A little,” agreed Cooper. “But it’s okay. I fully support your right to pursue romantic interests.”
“I thought you weren’t going to be sarcastic,” her father said.
“I’m not,” replied Cooper. “Scout’s honor. I’m all for this.”
“Thank you,” Mr. Rivers said, sounding relieved. “I was sort of afraid to tell you about it.”
“Why?” Cooper asked. “Is she nineteen years old or something?”
Her father laughed. “No,” he said. “It’s not that.”
Cooper was looking around the restaurant, wondering when her father’s date was going to arrive. Suddenly she noticed a familiar face walking through the maze of plants.
“Oh, Goddess,” she said to her father. “Look who’s here. It’s that troublemaker Amanda Barclay.”
Cooper watched as the newspaper reporter made her way through the restaurant. What was Amanda Barclay doing at Shiva’s Garden? she wondered. It didn’t seem like her kind of place. Then again, Cooper really couldn’t imagine Amanda Barclay in any restaurant. The woman was barely human as far as Cooper was concerned. Several times she had caused problems for Cooper by writing stories about Cooper’s life, first when Cooper had become involved in solving the murder of Elizabeth Sanger and then again when she had taken on the school board over its attempt to ban pentacles from being worn at Beecher Falls High School. Each time, Amanda had used the stories to further her own career rather than to do any actual service to anyone.
“Shouldn’t she be out helping send innocent people to jail, or putting kittens to sleep or something?” Cooper said to her father. She looked at him and grinned. “Remember when you had a little crush on her?” she asked, referring to the time before Amanda had made life difficult for Cooper, when Mr. Rivers had thought the woman was an ace reporter. “I’m glad you learned your lesson about that.”
Her father reddened. “Yes, well . . .” he said, and Cooper grinned. It wasn’t often that she could embarrass her father, and she relished the opportunity to make him uncomfortable for a moment.
“Here I am.”
Cooper looked up and saw Amanda Barclay standing beside their table. She frowned at the reporter. “So I see,” she said frostily. “But I don’t think anyone here ordered the hot-and-sour loser tonight.”
She continued to stare at Amanda. What made the woman think that after everything she’d done she could come say hello to Cooper and her father as if they were all friends or something? Was she out of her mind? But Amanda didn’t move. She just continued to look at Cooper. Cooper turned to her father for assistance.
“Um, Cooper, I’d like you to meet my date for tonight,” he said quietly.
Cooper laughed. “Right,” she said.
Her father didn’t laugh. Neither did Amanda. Cooper looked back and forth from one to the other, waiting for the joke to arrive. But it never came. Her f
ather was serious.
“What?” Cooper said finally.
Amanda pulled out the chair beside Mr. Rivers and sat down silently. Cooper’s father looked awkwardly from the reporter to his daughter, not saying anything. Cooper, in turn, kept looking from Amanda Barclay to her father, not saying anything either. She was in shock. No, she thought. You’re dreaming. That had to be it. Because there was no way her father was sitting at the same table with the reporter who had turned Cooper’s life upside down on not one but two occasions. There was no way that he was sitting there with her as his date.
“I guess this is a little uncomfortable,” Amanda said after a minute. She looked at Cooper. “But don’t blame your father for not saying anything. It was my idea for him not to tell you about us right away.”
Cooper let out a stifled laugh. Amanda Barclay was talking about herself and Cooper’s father as if they’d been a couple for a long time. Cooper watched in horror as the reporter slid her hand over the tablecloth and took Mr. Rivers’s hand in hers. Cooper wanted to reach over and slap her hand away. She shouldn’t be touching him, she thought.
“Are you ready to order?”
Cooper was startled out of her nightmare by the arrival of the waiter. He stood beside the table, looking at them all with a pleasant smile on his face. Cooper stared at him. She wanted to scream, “Help me! My father is under the influence of the most horrible woman in the universe!” But she couldn’t even speak. She was too overcome by the awfulness of the situation to even think about eating.
“I think we need a few more minutes,” Mr. Rivers said finally, and the waiter nodded and went away again.
“Cooper,” her father said a moment later, “this is, I’m sure, a little awkward for everyone.”
“No,” Cooper said, taking up her menu and opening it. “It’s fine.” She pretended to look at the items on the menu. “The channa saag is really excellent here.”
Her father didn’t say anything as he and Amanda looked at their own menus. Cooper hid behind hers, not really reading it but staring at the words until they became meaningless blurs. Her head was reeling. This just isn’t happening, she kept saying to herself. But it was happening. Every time she looked over the top of her menu she saw Amanda Barclay’s face. How was she going to sit through an entire dinner with the woman? More important, how was she going to deal with seeing her over and over again if her father really was dating her? And what if they got married someday? Suddenly she felt sick to her stomach.
“Excuse me,” she said, laying her menu down and standing up. “I have to go to the rest room.”
“Are you all right?” asked her father, looking concerned.
“Yeah,” Cooper said. “I’ll be back in a minute.”
She turned and walked quickly away, threading her way between the tables. As she passed the other diners, she couldn’t help but notice how much most of them seemed to be enjoying themselves. It occurred to her how weird it was that people at one table could be having a wonderful time while right next to them other people could be wishing they were dead. Like I do, she thought. No, I wish Amanda were dead, she amended.
She pushed open the door of the rest room and went inside. Heading for a stall, she stepped inside and locked the door behind her, collapsing onto the toilet. There, safe from the eyes of anyone else, she started to cry. She hated crying. It made her feel weak and stupid, like a little girl who couldn’t handle herself. She tried to keep the tears back, and as each one forced its way out she grew madder and madder.
“Damn it!” she said, smacking her hand against the door of the stall as the anger exploded out of her. “Damn it! Damn it! Damn it!”
It made her feel better to lash out, a reflection of the unhappiness inside of her. How could her father be dating Amanda Barclay? How could he do that to her? She ran her hands through her hair and tried to breathe. It was as if he’d punched her right in the stomach. Even hearing about her parents’ separation hadn’t hurt this much.
She pulled a length of toilet paper from the roll next to her and wiped her eyes. She hoped they weren’t too red. She wouldn’t be able to stand it if Amanda Barclay knew that she’d been crying. She’d probably write an article about it, thought Cooper angrily. I’m surprised she hasn’t run in here to interview me. She pictured the headline Amanda would put on the article: DATE’S DAUGHTER BOO-HOOS IN LOO.
She tried to calm the angry storm inside of her. She knew that being upset wasn’t going to help anything. What she needed to do was figure out how to handle the situation. You basically have two choices, she told herself. You can go back to the table and have dinner, or you can leave. She thought for a minute. I vote for leave, she told herself.
She wiped her face once more, stood up, and unlocked the door. Glancing at herself in the mirror, she made sure that her eyes weren’t too red and that there were no bits of toilet paper stuck to her face. Then she left the bathroom. She paused outside the door, looking back toward the table where her father and Amanda Barclay sat, waiting for her. She’d said that she’d come right back. But she couldn’t do that. She couldn’t sit and look at Amanda Barclay sitting beside her father.
Instead she headed for the front of the restaurant and the door. She felt terrible running out on her father that way, but it was really the best thing to do. Maybe not the most mature thing, she thought as she walked out, hoping her father wouldn’t see her, but definitely the best thing.
Once she was outside she practically ran to her car. As she pulled away from the curb and headed down the street, she couldn’t help but feel as if she’d made a great escape. She tried not to think about her father and Amanda, still sitting at the table and probably wondering what was taking her so long. She knew her father would be angry and hurt. She knew, too, that they would have to have it out about the subject sooner rather than later. But not right away. Not yet.
She drove home. When she arrived at her house she went inside. Her mother was coming out of the kitchen and startled Cooper by saying, “Hi, honey. How was dinner with your dad?”
Cooper had told her mother about the dinner, at least partly. She’d told her that she was seeing her father, but she’d left out the small matter of his bringing a date along. At the time, she’d done it to protect her mother’s feelings. Now she was glad she’d done it—to protect both their feelings. It would have been difficult enough to tell her mother about her father dating another woman; telling her that the woman was the person Cooper disliked probably more than anyone else in the known world would have been just about impossible.
On the other hand, it made the situation even worse. Having to pretend that everything was fine was almost as difficult as discussing her father’s new dating life would have been. Almost, but not quite. Still, it hurt Cooper that she had to keep all of her feelings hidden from her mother. They had been talking a lot more recently, and Cooper was enjoying being able to share things with her mom. But now she had to smile and pretend that she’d had a great time.
“It was good.” Cooper lied. “I had the matar paneer. Fantastic.”
“You’re home early,” remarked her mother, looking at her watch.
“Oh, yeah,” Cooper said. “Dad had some work he had to do, so we made an early night of it. But it’s okay. I want to work on some songs anyway.”
Her mother nodded. “Well, I’m glad you had a nice time,” she said.
Cooper went upstairs to her room, leaving her mother to watch television in the living room. She shut her door, put her guitar and backpack down, and collapsed on the bed. By now her father would most definitely have figured out that she’d bailed on him. She half expected the phone to ring, with his angry voice on the other end. Part of her even wanted him to call, just so she could know that he at least understood a little bit why she hadn’t been able to stay. But probably it was better if they didn’t talk about it yet. She was still upset, and needed some time to cool off.
She looked at the clock. It was only 7:45. She had to
think of something to do or she was going to just sit there and drive herself crazy. She wished she could go hang out with T.J., but he and Schroedinger’s Cat were playing at someone’s party. Jane had said she was going to a movie with another friend, and Kate and Annie both had other plans. Cooper was all by herself. That thought depressed her. Then, a moment later, it made her laugh.
“A year ago you would have been thrilled to be alone,” she said, scolding herself. “See what happens when you let yourself make friends?”
She sat up. It was true, she had gotten so used to having Kate, Annie, T.J., and now Jane around to do things with that suddenly finding herself alone was a shock. What had she done with herself before them? What had she done up there in her room all by herself? At the time, she’d thought she was being totally independent and cool. Now she just wondered what she’d done to keep from going stir-crazy.
You wrote songs, she reminded herself. True, but now she did that with Jane and sometimes with T.J. Although she still wrote by herself quite a bit, she no longer spent hour after hour penning angry lyrics and listening to herself play guitar through her headphones. That had been her way of shutting out the world, keeping herself safe. But bit by bit she’d allowed herself to let the world in, first by becoming friends with Annie and Kate and then by dating T.J. Those things had really helped her grow. But now she felt as if they’d also opened her up to a whole new set of problems. Was she too dependent on her friends and her boyfriend? Had she let them take over too much of her life?
No, she told herself. You’re just afraid that you’re losing them. And you’re afraid you’re losing your father, too.
Suddenly it all fell into place for her. Sure, she’d reacted so strongly to seeing her father with Amanda Barclay because she hated the woman. But it was more than that. It had reminded her of everything else she seemed to be losing. After being a loner for so long, she’d finally made some real friends. But now Kate and Annie were moving on without her, joining covens and becoming real witches while she had to be content with working on her own. She’d let T.J. into her life, and now she had to face the very real possibility that in a little more than a year they might be pulled apart by college. It was as if all of the connections she’d so hesitantly made were being torn apart, just as she’d always feared they would be.
