Playing Cupid

by Jenny Meyerhoff

  Alivia rolled her eyes, but said, “Fine, we can pick the restaurant later. That’s not the main thing. The main thing is, I think we should have dates. Like the boys should ask the girls to go to the dance with them.”

  My eyes darted over to Mateo. I couldn’t help it. I felt my heart race a little. If he asked me to go to the dance with him, would I dance with him all night? Would he kiss me good night? The thought made my stomach swoop in a big wave. I had to put down my sandwich for a moment.

  “Does that mean the guy has to pay for everything?” Logan asked. “Dinner and tickets and everything?”

  Alivia sighed. “That’s not the point.”

  Everyone kept talking about the details of how having dates for the dance would work, but I stopped paying attention when I realized that Emily still hadn’t come to lunch. I looked up at the door, expecting her to walk into the cafeteria any second, when I realized she was already in the caf. She was sitting with Joey and Evan and a couple of other kids from Mathletes.

  “You guys, look,” I said. “Emily’s eating with other people.” I pointed across the cafeteria.

  I was about to ask if I should go ask her to come back and sit with us when Alivia said, “Good for her.”

  “I’m so glad she found the right friends,” Danielle put in.

  “But you guys have all been friends since elementary school, right? Aren’t you guys the right friends for her?” I asked.

  Kacy shrugged. “People change.”

  “We’re different now. Even though it’s sad, it’s for the best,” Alivia said. “Some people are into socializing and cool stuff, and some people are into math, right?”

  I nodded, but I didn’t agree. Emily liked socializing and math. She just didn’t like being treated like she didn’t matter.

  “If you’d rather go sit with her,” Alivia gestured toward Emily’s table, “we’d totally understand.”

  I felt a little urge to stand up and walk to Emily’s table, but I didn’t move. I stayed where I was.

  That afternoon, all the seventh graders filed into the gym at the end of the day for the ABC assembly. The teachers gave out certificates for Best Business Plan, Greenest Business, and Most Community Positive Business. Then they announced the top five businesses, the ones that would be competing during the final week to see who would get to attend the Future Entrepreneurs Conference.

  I was nervous. Emily and I sat in the bleachers one row behind Alivia, Danielle, and Kacy. I could see that Danielle had her fingers crossed behind her back, but Alivia sat with her chin high in the air like she had no doubt that Sweet Alivia’s would be one of the chosen businesses. I didn’t feel nearly so confident. Mostly because even though there were only about four inches separating me and Emily in the real world, it felt like four miles. Or even four million miles.

  “In no particular order,” Mr. Bersand announced, “The top five businesses are: Abby’s Animals—a pet toy business. Cupid Clara—a matchmaking business …”

  We made it!

  I turned to Emily, full of excitement, but she gave me a calm smile and said, “Good job, Clara,” like we barely even knew each other.

  “Hoppy Frog—a game app business. Sweet Alivia’s—a bakery.”

  In front of me, Danielle breathed a huge sigh of relief, but Alivia’s expression didn’t change. She wasn’t surprised to be top five.

  “And finally, Clear Walks—a snow-shoveling business.”

  Once all the businesses were listed, everyone gave polite applause. The winners were all bouncing around excitedly. I was grinning too, even though I could feel Emily’s aloofness.

  “Congratulations to all our young entrepreneurs,” Mr. Bersand said. “I couldn’t have been more impressed with the creative ideas and business savvy you all demonstrated. Now it’s time to get to work on your final reflection papers including your financial accounting statements detailing your expenses, gross profits, and net profits. Great work, everyone!”

  When the assembly was over we all stood up.

  “Congratulations, you guys,” Alivia said to me and Emily with a funny smile. “May the best girls win!”

  “I’m sure it will be you,” I told her.

  “Thanks,” she said.

  “Seriously,” I told her. “It’s almost inhuman how many cookies and muffins you made over the past couple of weeks. You deserve to win just for effort.”

  Alivia squinted her eyes and me. Then her smile returned. “This is just really important to me,” she said. “I want to be a pastry chef someday.”

  “Well, good luck,” I said. “Maybe we’ll tie for best business.”

  “Yeah,” Alivia said, though she didn’t look too excited about it. “Maybe.”

  The next day, the school lobby looked like a giant empty cavern now that all but five of the ABC businesses had closed up shop. All five tables sat together near the entrance to the office, and on the other side of the lobby, a new table had been set up selling tickets to the Hot Chocolate Social. It was fun to see so many students who’d gotten Claragrams buying tickets. I bet the dance floor would be packed during the slow dance this year. I’d made sixty-eight matches total, and would probably make a few more.

  Before school started for the day, I opened my folder and looked at my list of Matches. Besides my friends, I had a few that were my favorites. Like the couple that almost had the same name, Alex Levine and Alex Levy. Okay, so one was an Alexander and the other was an Alexa, it was still pretty close. I also liked the couple that both raised chickens in their backyards, Eleanor and Matthew, and the couple that both wanted to star on Broadway, Laura and Jeremy. I smiled.

  When students started arriving, I sat alone at the Cupid Clara table, offering out questionnaires to all who passed by. But not many people took them. What a terrible time for a slump to be starting again. Especially since Alivia’s “date” idea had really caught on. I’d heard a lot of other people planned to bring dates now.

  I couldn’t figure out what had happened to make my customers disappear again. With the dance so close, I would have thought business would increase. And I couldn’t have already reached all my potential customers. There were more than seven hundred kids at Austen. I looked at the other four tables. They all had plenty of customers, so the problem had to be something specific to Cupid Clara.

  “How’s my favorite Cupid?” Mateo called, sidling up to our table.

  “Things aren’t so great.” I pointed around the lobby. “No customers.”

  Mateo wrinkled his forehead. “I thought you weren’t accepting any new questionnaires anymore, now that the dance was so close.”

  “What?” I raised my palms in the air. “Why would you think that? I never said that.”

  Mateo shrugged. “I don’t know. I heard it somewhere. One of the guys told me.”

  I scratched my head. It didn’t make any sense. “Well, tell him he’s wrong. I’ll be making matches right up until the end.”

  “Sure,” said Mateo, leaning against the corner of my table. “So, does everyone know who they’re going to the dance with?” He lowered his voice to a loud whisper for that last part and pointed to the ticket table at the other end of the lobby.

  Alivia shot Logan a look.

  “What?” he said. “I’m waiting to see if my dad will give me the money. Two dinners plus two tickets is way more than my allowance.”

  Alivia turned purple, so I said to Mateo, “Who are you going to dance with? It’s not fair of you to ask everyone but yourself.”

  Mateo looked at the ground. “I haven’t asked her yet. I’m going to do it after school one day this week.”

  I felt a blush creeping up my neck, but then the bell rang, and we all had to go to class.

  Emily came home with me after school so we could work on our final Cupid Clara reflection paper and financial analysis. One block ahead of us, we could see Joey walking home alone. It hurt that he wasn’t walking with us. I wondered if Joey would ever want to be friends with
me again now that he thought I was a jerk. But maybe I could prove him wrong. Maybe I could be in the popular group and be a good friend to Emily.

  “Are the kids from Mathletes nice?” I asked her.

  “You know them. Or some of them, anyway,” Emily said, pointing up ahead. She tilted her head, studying Joey. “They are actually really nice. I never have to plan what I say when I’m with them. I even used to be friends with one of the girls, Lexi, when we were in preschool.”

  “That’s great,” I said, but a part of me wished she’d told me that the kids were terrible. That she missed me and wanted to come back into our friend group. It was weird. I’d wanted to become closer with the other girls, but now that I was, I missed Emily. I wanted to come up with some way to convince Alivia that she was wrong about Emily. I wanted to show Emily that I still cared.

  “I know we have to work on our paper, but you were supposed to be my first match, and I still haven’t found you a guy,” I said. “Do you want me to work on that today too?”

  Emily looked down at the sidewalk. “That’s okay,” she said. “But I don’t want you to make me a match.”

  “Really?” I turned to face Emily. “I know it didn’t work out so great last time, but don’t give up. I can make you a great match. I know I can.”

  Emily shook her head. “I’m not giving up.” She lowered her chin and looked at me shyly. Then she looked up ahead at Joey. “I already like someone. I realized it during the snowball fight. I realized a lot of things that day.”

  I watched Emily as her eyes followed Joey walking up the driveway and into his house. A little smile lit up her face.

  Suddenly my ears felt clogged, and every noise, including the sound of my own voice sounded far away. Did Emily like Joey?

  I remembered how angry Joey was at the way I’d treated Emily. Did he like her back?

  The dreamy little smile still played at the corners of Emily’s lips. I couldn’t speak. It felt like I had a Claragram wadded up in the middle of my throat. For the rest of the afternoon, I could barely concentrate as Emily and I made the outline for our paper and started inputting all our financial information into our spreadsheet. My ears were buzzing and my stomach was roiling.

  When I pictured Mateo in my head, I knew. It didn’t matter how much I had in common with him, or how good he was for business, I didn’t like him in that way. I couldn’t like him in that way. I would never like him in that way because there was no spark. Because he didn’t have that indefinable something. Because he didn’t make me feel like I wanted to be a better person. Because he wasn’t like …

  The realization hit me like a snowball, smack in the face.

  I could never like Mateo because he wasn’t Joey.

  I liked Joey.

  And not only would he never be my boyfriend, I wasn’t even sure if we were friends anymore.

  When I said good-bye to Emily that evening, it felt like I was saying good-bye to her forever. Of course, I wasn’t. I’d see her at school the next day, but our friendship would never be the same. She’d start going out with Joey and hanging with the Mathletes, and I’d never be able to tell her how I really felt.

  As I started preparing dinner for me and Papi, I was pretty sure my life was as bad as it could get, but I was wrong. Papi walked through the front door at 6:45.

  “What are you doing home so early?” I asked.

  Papi shook his head at me. “I just got your progress report from school today.”

  My stomach dropped. I’d forgotten that at Austen teachers posted progress reports midway through the marking period.

  “Progress reports aren’t final grades,” I reminded him. “And I’m doing really well in most of my classes. Cupid Clara is one of the top five businesses!”

  My fathers’ face softened. “I’m proud of you. But you are flunking science.”

  “I’ve just been really busy working on my business,” I explained, feeling flustered. “And science has always been my hardest subject, but I’m working on it. I even have a tutor!”

  “I know,” Papi said, giving me another stern look.

  I didn’t think my stomach could feel any lower, but now it felt like my entire middle had flattened like a tortilla. How did Papi know? Maybe Joey’s father had told him?

  “I called your teacher,” he explained. “She was very confused that I didn’t know you were struggling in her class. She told me that was why she asked me to sign your test.”

  I swallowed hard. This wasn’t good.

  “But I didn’t sign anything.”

  The water for the rice began to boil over, and I quickly turned it off. My father’s expression didn’t change. It was like he hadn’t even noticed the sizzle of water as it splashed over the edges of the pot and onto the stovetop.

  “Lo siento,” I whispered. I didn’t trust my voice to get any louder. I’d probably start crying. Papi didn’t get angry very often, but when he did, he got very angry.

  “ ‘I’m sorry’ is not good enough. You need to explain.” He folded his arms across his chest and looked at me expectantly.

  I nodded but didn’t say anything. I couldn’t. I couldn’t let Papi see that my whole life was a great big mess.

  “Clara, I don’t know what to do anymore. You keep telling me that everything is fine, but then I find out it’s not fine at all. Your mami is right. A girl your age needs more than just a father.” He rubbed his hands all over his face and blew an exasperated sound between his lips. Finally he shook his head. “Maybe it would be better for you to live with her.”

  The tears started slipping silently from my eyes. This couldn’t be happening. “Papi, no, por favor,” I begged.

  “We won’t make any decisions until this summer.” Papi wouldn’t look at me. His shoulders were low. “Go to your room and finish your homework. I’ll make dinner tonight.”

  The next few days, I felt like I was a zombie: On the outside, I looked like all the other seventh graders at Austen, but on the inside, my feelings were dead. The only thing I could think about was the fact that it didn’t matter what happened at Austen anymore since next year this wouldn’t even be my school.

  When I went to Mrs. Fox’s room at the end of the day to meet Joey for another tutoring session, I could barely get my eyes to focus on the paper in front of me. What was the point? I’d already messed up. It couldn’t get any worse than it already was.

  After a few minutes, I realized that Joey wasn’t explaining anymore. He was staring at Mrs. Fox’s lab safety poster. I couldn’t believe Joey wasn’t going to be my next-door neighbor anymore.

  “What’s the matter?” he asked. I was surprised to hear how caring his voice sounded. Maybe he didn’t totally hate me. Or maybe all our years of friendship meant that even though we weren’t friends anymore, he still didn’t want me to be sad.

  I sighed. I might as well tell him. “I think Papi is going to make me go live with my mother.”

  Joey put his hand on my shoulder. “Why would you think that?”

  “Because I’m too difficult to handle,” I told him. “Because I’m a horrible person.”

  A huge sob bubbled out of my chest before I could stop it. I jumped up, covered my mouth, and ran out of the room. I tore down the hall to the girls’ bathroom. I raced into the nearest stall, grabbed a handful of toilet paper, and started wiping myself up when I heard the door open.

  “Hi, Marigold, it’s Alivia.”

  I froze. After Joey, Alivia was the last person I wanted to see me with snot hanging out of my nose. I slowly climbed up onto the toilet seat so my legs would be hidden from view, and waited.

  “For tomorrow, I want four dozen mini muffins, six dozen cookies—half chocolate chip and half oatmeal M&M—plus five dozen kitchen-sink brownies. Great, we’ll be by to pick them up on the way to school, just like always.”

  I shook my head because I couldn’t believe my ears. What was Alivia doing? Ordering her baked goods? How could she be turning a profit if she ha
d to be paying someone else to be her baker? And why hadn’t she told anyone that was what she was doing?

  I pressed my knuckles against my mouth. I was so dumb. Alivia hadn’t told anyone because she was cheating. It was the only thing that made sense.

  “Bye,” Alivia said just as I heard the door swing open again.

  “Clara?” Emily’s voice echoed off the tiled walls.

  “Clara?” Alivia repeated, sounding panicked. There was a shuffling of feet. I thought she might be checking under the stalls. “She’s not in here.”

  “Oh,” Emily said. “Sorry. Somebody told me she was upset. I thought she might be in here.”

  “Wait,” Alivia called out. Emily must have been about to leave.

  “Yes?” Emily’s voiced echoed in quiet bathroom.

  “I wanted to explain,” Alivia said. “About yesterday.”

  Yesterday? What was going on? I should probably clear my throat or something. This eavesdropping thing was going too far, but I stayed frozen as a statue. I couldn’t help myself.

  “You don’t have to explain,” said Emily, “but you do need to confess to Mr. Bersand. Otherwise I’m going to tell him.”

  Had Emily found out that Alivia wasn’t really making her own products too?

  “It was an innocent mistake,” Alivia crooned. “I really thought that you and Clara weren’t accepting any new questionnaires. It was, like, a public service to let people know.”

  That’s why no one was coming to our booth anymore! I couldn’t believe it. I knew Alivia could be moody and kind of self-centered, but I thought she was my friend.

  “Maybe it was a mistake, and maybe it wasn’t, but you still need to tell,” Emily said firmly.

  “And what if I don’t? Are you going to tattletale? Because that would be a huge mistake. Look at yourself: You have no fashion sense, you don’t even make any effort to be cool, all you care about is schoolwork, and you are a total suck-up to all the teachers. The only reason that everyone doesn’t call you out for being the loser that you are is because you used to be my friend. Go ahead and tell on me, and then have fun becoming the joke of Austen Middle School.”