by Carlos King
ASTRAY
By
Carlos King
http://carlosjking.blogspot.com
CHAPTER 1
EMPTY SEAT
FALL OF 2002
Inside of a rundown high school in Brooklyn, NY, the students of an eleventh-grade math class watch their teacher as she writes an equation on the blackboard. Once their teacher, Mrs. Hobbs, finishes the equation, she places the chalk back on the silver railing and turns to face the class.
“Now, who wants to solve it?” The kids remain silent. “Come on. No one wants to take a shot? You guys, we’ve been working on this for the last two weeks now. You mean to tell me none of you understand it yet?”
A young girl sitting in the front row slowly raises her hand. As Mrs. Hobbs looks around the class for a volunteer, she notices the raised hand. “Ah, Ms. Robinson…Come on up.”
Alexis Robinson, the timid young girl who raised her hand gets up and approaches the board. The sound of teenage snickering can softly be heard throughout the classroom. The cause for the laughter could possibly due in part to the fact that the shy girl’s hair isn’t properly groomed or maybe even because her clothes and shoes aren’t as up-to-date or as clean as they should be. Ignoring the giggles, the young girl picks up a small piece of chalk and begins writing.
After a few seconds, she places the chalk back on the railing and quickly takes her seat. Mrs. Hobbs reviews the equation and is pleased with how it was solved. “Very good,” said the teacher. “I’m glad someone in here pays attention.” Alexis gives a smile of pride at the teacher’s compliment, which is then overridden by an insult made by one of her male classmates.
“If she’s so smart, how come she don’t know she’s supposed to wash her clothes once a week?” The uproar of laughter instantly wipes the proud smile off of Alexis’ face, leaving an air of embarrassment in its place.
“Probably for the same reason you didn’t know that little comment of yours would land you in detention for the rest of the week,” Mrs. Hobbs told the jokester.
“But I got practice this week,” the boy retorted. “Coach will kill me if I get put into detention.”
“I guess you should’ve considered that before you made your offensive statement towards Ms. Robinson.”
The bell rings and the students stampede out of class. Mrs. Hobbs yells out, “Don’t forget to tell your parents that the money for extra graduation tickets will be due by the end of the month! So if anyone else wants to see the graduating class of 2001 walk across stage, they better act fast!”
As Alexis prepares to exit the classroom she’s stopped by Mrs. Hobbs. “Alexis, can I talk to you for a minute?” Alexis walks over to Mrs. Hobbs’ desk. “I’m sorry about that little outburst earlier. You shouldn’t pay them any mind. They’re just spiteful of your intelligence, that’s all.”
“It’s alright,” Alexis spoke softly. “They joke like that all the time. I don’t pay it too much attention anymore. So are you still coming to the talent show tonight?”
“I’ll be there. Are you sure you want to go through with this? You already know how some of the kids may react when you hit the stage. They might try and give you a hard time while you’re performing.”
“I’m sure. The way I figure it, a good performer should be able to overcome any kind of crowd. I’m gonna have to really put my heart into my performance tonight if I want to overcome the kids of this school.”
Mrs. Hobbs smiles, “I really admire you, Alexis. I wish I had your courage. No matter what happens in your life, try not to ever lose that special quality. It’s so easy to lose those defining qualities as you become an adult and it’s so hard to get them back…And that’s only if you’re lucky enough to get them back at all.”
Another bell rings out. Alexis looks up at the wall clock mounted behind Mrs. Hobbs desk. She only has a minute to get to her next class. “I better go,”
“Okay, Ms Robinson. I’ll see you tonight at the show. Oh, by the way, is your mother going to be there tonight? I’ve been looking forward to meeting her.”
Alexis smiles. “She told me she’d be there. I bought her a first row seat. I’ll introduce you two when the show is over.”
“Alright, sweetie, I’ll see you both tonight. In case I don’t see you before you go onstage, I just want to wish you good luck.” Mrs. Hobbs added.
“Thanks, Mrs. Hobbs.”
Later that day, students, parents, and teachers are all gathered in the school auditorium awaiting the opening act. Peaking from behind the curtain stage, Alexis stares at the capacity filled auditorium. Almost instantly after noticing the large amount of attendees present, her anxiety goes on the rise with every passing minute.
Alexis glances over at the chair she reserved for her mother only to discover that the seat is still empty. Disappointed, she starts looking around the auditorium for Mrs. Hobbs, and after perusing through several rows she finally spots her favorite teacher sitting with her husband a few rows above the seat she reserved for her mom. A gradual look of relief settles across her face.
Once everything has been set up and all the members of the audience have taken their seats, an older man walks out onto the stage. “Attention, attention,” the older male began. “May I have everyone’s attention?” The crowd muffles down and tunes in on what the older man is saying. “We’re ready to begin our show. We ask that you hold your reactions for each performer until they’re through with their performance. The first person to come out is…” the older man pauses to look at an index card in his left hand. “Our first performer will be Alexis Robinson of the sophomore class,” he concluded.
While there are very few people in the audience, including Mrs. Hobbs and her husband, who clap for Alexis, cruel jokes, rude remarks, and taunting laughter are what dominate the atmosphere. After taking several deep breathes, Alexis rejects the cruelty of the crowd and boldly marches out on stage.
“Enough of that now,” the older man stated to the crowd. The crowd calms back down and the older man hands Alexis the microphone.
Alexis takes one last deep breaths. She knows the majority of the audience wants nothing more than to see her fail. It’s this sense of urgency that fuels Alexis’s need to succeed. She turns her head toward the audio tech and nods, gesturing her readiness to begin. The audio tech turns on the system and increases the volume to a desirable level. The music playing is the instrumental version to Destiny’s Child’s ‘Emotions’.
From the first words that come from Alexis’ mouth, it becomes clear to everyone listening that she has vocal talent, and once she pushes through her initial jitters, she proves to everyone in the audience that she has a truly special gift. Every time Alexis successfully hits a high note or a note that seems like it’s out of her range, the crowd bursts into cheers. Alexis puts so much emotion into her performance that tears stream from her water eyes and roll down her golden-brown cheeks midway through her performance. It’s this sentiment that leads to a small portion of the audience tearing up as well.
When the performance is over the crowd erupts in applause. Even the people who ridiculed her when she first stepped onstage were forced to respect the powerful performance. Alexis takes a bow and calmly walks off stage. She’s immediately greeted by an ecstatic Mrs. Hobbs. With her eyes still teary from her prize pupil’s commanding performance, Mrs. Hobbs reaches out to Alexis and embraces her in a congratulatory hug.
“You did great,” Mrs. Hobbs smiled, wiping tears from Alexis’ cheek. “I’m so proud of you.”
“Thank you.”
“I know your mom’s excited.” Mrs. Hobbs looks around for Alexis’ mother, but sees no one standing in range that would fit the description. “Where is she?”
“She didn’t come,” Alexis sadly uttered. “I guess she was t
oo busy to stop by.”
“I’m sorry, honey. I know you wanted her to be here.”
“It would’ve been nice. At least you were able to come, though.”
“Do you want to call your mom and ask her if it’s okay if you grab something to eat with my husband and me?” Mrs. Hobbs asked. “You know, sort of a celebration dinner.”
“No, thank you. I have to be getting home. Thanks again for the offer.” she added, as she walked toward a nearby chair that held her belongings.
“Alright, sweetie, I guess I’ll see you in class tomorrow.”
Alexis grabs her coat and book bag from the back of the chair and makes her way toward the exit.
Mrs. Hobbs calls out to Alex. “Hey, you’re not going to stick around to see if you won?”
Smiling, Alex replies, “Nah, I already got what I wanted.” She then proceeds to exit the auditorium. Mrs. Hobbs smiles before heading back to her seat.
CHAPTER 2
A MOTHER’S BETRAYAL
Barely making it to her home before sunset, Alexis is now approaching the stoop of her apartment building. It’s a rundown structure located in the middle of what could easily be called a bad neighborhood. As Alexis enters her apartment, she spots her mother lying face-down on the badly-stained carpet in the cramped spacing of what they call their living room.
“Mama!” Alexis called out, rushing to her mother’s side. “Mama, you okay?!” She kneels beside her mother and shakes her shoulder to revive her. After a few shrugs her mother begins to slowly come to.
“Hi, baby. How did your play go?” her mother asked in a dragging tone. It’s obvious that her mother wasn’t lying on the floor due to injury or ache…She’s lying there because she passed out. Unemployed and living off Welfare provided to her by the state, Latoya Robinson hasn’t held down steady employment in years. She has, however, been able to successfully sustain her drug habits for as far back as Alexis can remember.
Alexis helps her mother to the raggedy living room couch. “It wasn’t a play, Mama. It was a talent show,” Alexis explained, “and it went okay.”
Groggy and unfocused, Latoya attempts to show parental concern. “Did you win, baby?”
Remembering how she was able to gain the respect of a once hostile crowd and receive a massive applause from the very same people makes Alexis smile. “You could say that.”
There’s an unexpected knock at their door. “Who the hell is that?” Latoya said, regaining her focus. “Wait, what time is it?”
Alex looks at the digital watch wrapped around her wrist. She found this very watch lying outside her school a couple weeks earlier. It was a good running watch that kept accurate time. The only problem was the tiny pin used to adjust and secure the watch had been broken off. Finding this as no reason to throw the watch away, Alexis rigged the watch with a safety pin and has worn it ever since. “It’s a little after six.”
Her mother hastily responds, “Shit. That must be Dre. Baby, go open the door for him. I need to get cleaned up.” As her mother into the backroom, Alexis hesitantly answers the door. When she opens the door she finds her mother’s baggy-clothes wearing, drug-dealing boyfriend, DeAndre, standing in the doorway.
“What’s up, little Lexis?” he asked with a devious eyes and a conniving grin. “What’s been going on with you?”
“Nothing,” she responded dully. “Mama’s in the back. She said she’ll be out in a minute.” Alexis takes a seat back on the couch and begins digging through her backpack. While she searches for a book, Dre decides to utilize his time alone with Alexis and takes a seat right beside her.
“So I hear you got a birthday coming up, huh? How old you gone be?”
“Fourteen.”
“That’s what’s up. You should let me get you something for the occasion. What can Dre-Dre get you for your birthday?” Dre runs his fingers through her hair. This instantly alarms Alexis, causing her to jump up from her seated position. “Damn, your little ass is fine as hell,” he added.
Alexis’ mother staggers back into the living room. “What y’all in here doing?”
Dre swiftly responds, “Nothing, babe. I was just asking Lexi what she wanted for her birthday.” Alexis picks up her books and shoves them back into her backpack. She throws the backpack over her shoulder and goes into her room.
“So did you bring the stuff?” Latoya asked Dre.
“Damn, Toya…A nigga ain’t been in here for a good five minutes and you already trying to hit me up. You need to calm yo’ ass down.”
“Well shit, I’ve been waiting all day,” Latoya explained. “I’m starting to feel sick.”
“Don’t trip. I got the shit,” Dre confirmed. “But I’m not feeling all that generous today. So what are you gone give me in order to get your hands on my supply?”
Sitting inside her tiny, yet neatly kept room, Alexis tries to drown out the conversation between her mother and Dre by turning on her small screen television, drowning them out. She digs into her backpack and pulls out a small carton of milk and a hot dog with bun that she had brought home from school. From the way she wrapped the hotdog it’s clear that she’s no stranger to taking home her school lunch for dinner.
“Come on, Dre. I need a fix,” Latoya pleaded. “Stop playing games.”
“Ain’t nobody playing no mothafuckin’ games. If you want a hit, you’re gonna have to do something for me.”
“Okay, what you want?” Latoya desperately asked.
“What do I always want when you freeload off me?”
“That’s what I’m saying, baby,” said Latoya, rubbing her hand down Dre’s chest to his stomach. “You know I’m gone do you right. So why don’t you let me get my fix so we can take it to the bedroom.”
“Don’t nobody want yo’ ass when you get high. You just be laying there and shit. When a nigga lay with a female he wants some feedback. Some moaning, some back scratching, something to let him know he getting that ass right. Your ass be so high and shit, you wouldn’t notice if somebody was cutting yo’ fucking arm off.”
“So what you saying then?” Latoya asked.
“I’m saying that if you want some of my product, I want something of yours. I want Alexis,” Dre boldly asserted.
An irate Latoya verbally explodes, “What the fuck you mean you want Alexis?! Are you out of your fucking mind, Dre?!”
“Who the fuck you yelling at like that?”
“I’m yelling at you!” “How the hell you gone try and fuck my daughter?! What kind of sick shit is that?! You know what?! Get the fuck out, Dre!”
“Fine, I’m out,” Dre said, moving for the front door. “But before I go you better think about this…When I leave, who the hell you gone get your next fix from? You go out there and try to find another dealer if you want. If yo’ ass gets picked up by the law, what’s gone happen to your little girl then?”
Latoya tries to stay focused on her anger towards Dre, despite the fact that her withdrawal symptoms are flaring up.
“Come on, babe, it’s not like I’m gone hurt the girl. I’m just trying to satisfy my needs just like how you trying to satisfy yours.”
Latoya’s attention span starts to weaken as the effects of her withdrawals take control. She begins to scratch her arm erratically as her debate with Dre continues.
“It’s not right,” she adamantly stated.
“I’ll tell you what’s not right…The fact that you’re about to catch hell with them shakes…And for what? To keep your daughter from doing something that she’s probably already done or at least something she’ll definitely be doing in the near damn future? Now does that make sense to you?”
Latoya continues to listen on as the words from a slick talking Dre begin to play on her conscious.
Dre goes on. “And is it fair that you’re gonna suffer your ass off for nothing?” Latoya doesn’t respond and continues to stand by the door, scratching all over her body. “Look, just take a hit and relax. By the time you come around I’ll be gone a
nd your daughter will still be safe and sound in her own bed.”
“I can’t do that to my baby,” Latoya proclaimed with her last ounce of will.
“Yes you can, babe,” said Dre, “It’s a onetime deal, alright?” Dre reaches into his jacket pocket and pulls out a tiny sack and hands it to Latoya.
She quickly snatches the sack and lowers her head in shame as she heads towards her bedroom. As she nears her bedroom door she turns to Dre and says, “Just this one time, Dre. I’m serious.”
With a devilish smirk, Dre happily replies, “You got it, babe. This’ll be the one and only time.”
“You better not hurt my baby, either.”
“Ain’t nobody gone hurt that girl.”
As Latoya goes into her bedroom, Dre takes off his jacket and throws it on the stain-infested sofa. He slowly pushes Alexis’ bedroom door open. A sleeping Alexis is lying under the covers of her bed when she’s awakened by the incoming light from the living room. When she realizes that Dre is standing in her doorway she sits up.
“What do you want?!” Alexis asked, startled.
“What’s up, baby girl? I just wanted to spend a little time with you.”
“Get out of my room, Dre!”
“Okay, baby. I’ll leave as soon as we’re done, okay?”
“Get out of my room, Dre! Mama!” Alexis cried out. “Mama!” Dre crosses into Alexis’ room and closes the door behind him, causing the entire room to go dark.
As Latoya lies in her bed, passed out from the drugs she’s just consumed, the sounds of her daughter screaming for her help can clearly be heard.
Alexis continues to scream, “MAMA, COME GET DRE! MAMA, PLEASE!”
Alex’s cries for help are immediately followed by the sounds of a demanding Dre ordering her to shut up. Alexis’s screams get even louder.
Dre violently yells out, “SHUT THE FUCK UP!” Alexis’ loud cries blaze through the tiny apartment, but to no avail.
The following morning, Latoya walks into Alexis’ bedroom and discovers that Dre didn’t just up and leave like he originally said he would, but instead, chose to spend the night in her daughter’s bed, his naked body lying underneath her blood-stained sheets. Latoya looks around the room and spots her undressed daughter sitting in the corner, wrapped in a sheet as she continues to softly weep, her arms tightly wrapped around her knees, her head down. Latoya makes a poor attempt at consoling her daughter by kneeling beside her, trying to soothe her.
