“Get. Dressed.”
“That ordering me around needs to stop. I’m not your property.”
“Really, Ixchel?” He tilted his head with a smirk. “You were wrong in your assumption before. I’m perfectly willing to drag you out of here naked.”
Then I’ll turn into a jaguar and rip the throat out of your human form before you can shift. No…she wouldn’t do that. But she could.
Votan stepped out. “I’ll wait for you in the kitchen.”
His seed spilled out of her when she got up, fueling her annoyance even more. Yes, she got dressed, because she was a civilized human being. Not because the asshole had ordered her to.
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Chapter 8
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Michelle found Votan raiding Max’s pantry. He drank almond milk from the carton then chomped a huge bite of a foie gras sandwich. She stood staring at him a moment.
“I’ve had one shitty meal on an airplane since yesterday.”
Her lips screwed to one side. “If you’re low on money you’re better off staying here. Maximon is rich.”
“Of course he is.” He pulled back his top lip in a sneer. “I have enough money for the next two lifetimes. I didn’t stop to eat because I was obsessed.”
“Oh.” She stated it without sympathy. “Tell me how I can un-spirit-mark you.”
His brow lifted. “Me?”
Michelle nodded with her gaze steady.
He grumbled and took another bite. After chewing and swallowing he said, “Why are you always so difficult? We are the true mates here. What you’ve done with Maximon is infidelity.”
“Yeah. I guess that happens a lot with gods and goddesses. Particularly when one acts like a jackass.”
He gave an acrimonious laugh. “My word—it’s you. It’s exactly you. You’re in the body of this pretty blonde mortal girl, but every word is pure Ixchel.” He shook his head. “Gods, I’ve missed you.”
She swallowed. Her stupid heart was breaking just at the thought of dumping him. Only pride kept her fixed on it. “Then why are you bulldozing everything?”
“Why am I angry? Why am I impatient and demanding? Because in your last lifetime you cast me aside for Maximon. Punishment for some slight in the lifetime before that. You left me solitary and listless. It was a miserable existence. I was hardly a man at all—I remained a beast, because at least in that form I didn’t ache for companionship.”
Her eyes lowered.
“Then finally you’re reborn and I’m waiting for you. I’m vowing to do better. To keep you forever this time. To be worthy of you.”
She peeked up.
“And then you pull at my heart. I rejoice. You’ve decided to come back to me. This life will be magnificent. I ached for you. Longed for you. I think of how we can thrive together in this world and in this age. I was beside myself with joy.” He paused to shove his food away. “But it was just another game. You decided I still had to be punished. Sometimes I forget how diabolical you can be.” He glared at her. “Of course I’m angry. Don’t dare try to begrudge me that.”
She was at a loss for a short while. Votan waited while rapping his nails on the counter.
“I’m not like that, though.”
“Puh.”
“No, I mean, you said I’m just the human form of Ixchel. That I’m just like her. Well, I always thought that too. Whenever I went into my stream I was finding more of myself. There were memories I hadn’t tapped into, but they were all relatable. I’ve always been this same girl through all the lifetimes I’ve lived.” She searched the floor for her thoughts. “I just don’t see myself doing something like this. If it’s revenge it’s absolutely stupid. I’m hurting myself more than anyone in this situation. Why would I? And why would I hurt Maximon in the process?”
“Maybe he defied you in your last lifetime.” He shrugged with one large shoulder. “How am I to know? The facts are the facts. This is what you’ve wrought, Ixchel. You can refuse to own it all you want. You did this to us.”
“Then I had a reason. And it’s not for stupid revenge. If anything I’d just refuse to mate with either of you. I’m not going to throw myself into such a bullshit situation.”
“Then tell me your reason.”
She grew irked. “I don’t know what the reason is.”
“Find out. It’s simple enough.”
“How?”
He snorted. “Fine. I’ll show you. And I’ll show you how to fix it.” He put on his jacket. “Let’s go.”
“Go where?”
“My hotel. This will take time and I’m not willing to spend it in this desecrator’s home.”
Michelle gave a groan of exasperation. “My whole purpose today was to keep you here so that we could try to work things out.”
“This thing can’t work out.” He strode for the door. “Stop trying my patience. You at least owe me that.”
I don’t owe you shit. She grabbed a sticky note from the pad beside the phone and scrawled a fast message, ending it with her cell number.
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Chapter 9
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The fact that he had a suite at the Four Seasons convinced her that he wasn’t lying about his wealth. This put both her mates on equal standing financially. At least Votan couldn’t accuse her of dumping him because he was poor.
“I’m still hungry,” he said, while going through the hotel’s binder. “Can I order you dinner?”
Michelle plopped onto the king sized bed. (She’d only seen swanky hotel rooms like this in movies.) The gracious offer eased the tension between them. She followed that vibe.
“Sure. What do they have?”
“Your favorites,” he said, without looking up. “Raw oysters. Duck a l'orange. Baklava.”
“Um. I’ve never eaten any of that.”
He picked up the phone. “Why not?”
“I’m a broke college grad from New Mexico. The first time I flew on a plane was when I came here.”
He grinned at her. “You’re humble in all your lives. It’s part of your charm.” He ordered for both of them and hung up.
“What about you? All I know about you is that you stay in your jaguar form in the Yucatan jungle.”
He looked her over a moment as though seeing through new eyes. There was love in his gaze, a fondness that had been fostered over lifetimes that she didn’t remember. And yet…it resonated with her.
“The jungle always calls to me. This lifetime took me away from my family earlier than most. I was born to a defective mother and absent father.”
“What do you mean defective?”
“Maybe it was lead poisoning. Maybe it was mercury. The water was tainted where she grew up. She was crazy. Paranoid. Violent. By the time I was eleven she didn’t even know who I was. My aunt let me sleep in a lean-to connected to her shack. She fed her children first and me last. I ran away to sneak into the USA when I was sixteen.”
She fluttered her eyelids. “Wait, so, you’re Mexican? You barely have an accent.”
“My accent is what was made over seven hundred and eighty-two lifetimes. I’m not the mortal named Miguel. I accepted my godhood.”
She nodded. “I hope this doesn’t sound offensive, but most Mexicans I know are shorter and less built than you.”
He turned up his hands. “This is the body of Votan. I was remade when I shirked my human side. It’s just another set of memories now. Bad ones.”
Michelle scratched at a cuticle. “How could you do it? I mean…I just put a paw in the stream and I feel like I’m going to explode. I can’t dive all the way in for more than a few seconds. It’s terrifying.”
“Hmm.” He stared at her, and then let his gaze trail of
f.
This ended the conversation. She presumed it was because it hurt for him to talk about it.
Dinner arrived. Michelle had expected Styrofoam containers in paper bags. Her only experience with food delivery was Chinese take-out and pizza. Instead a man dressed like a fancy butler rolled in a tiered cart with silver domed platters. The oysters were embedded in crushed ice with half lemons covered in tied-off cheese cloth. The duck had slivers of rind on it and peeled orange segments arranged neatly around it. The baklava seemed to be a pie made out of edible paper. Michelle withheld her awe for when the man left. She saw Votan tip him with a ten dollar bill.
“Holy crap. Look at all this.”
Votan smiled with one side of his mouth. It was a familiar smile to her. She knew he made it whenever he was enchanted by her.
“I like being able to amaze you. It’s such a brief period—when you can still be impressed. You become so adorable.”
Sometimes you can be charming, too. She wouldn’t have protested if he pushed the food aside for another bought of lovemaking. That was one area where she had no complaints about him.
Of course he was right. She adored this food. The oysters looked daunting, but he showed her how to add horse radish, lemon, and salt, and after the first one she was in heaven. The duck’s skin was crispy deliciousness. The baklava was dripping with honey, and each papery sheet of delicate phyllo yielded itself to the cut of her teeth.
She reclined back on the bed with a hand on her belly. “Oh my God that was so good.”
Votan crept beside her. His thick arm coiled around her back.
“You see, my love. I know you. We’re one spirit. We quarrel sometimes. We push each other away now and again. But we always come back to each other. Our union is meant to be. No matter what happens between us, we’ll always love each other.”
Michelle nestled into the crook of his shoulder. She looked up at him with heavy-lidded eyes. “I believe it. You’re a big domineering jerk—but I think I can put up with you.”
He caressed the side of her face, lighting up tingles. “Sometimes you like to be dominated.”
“Oh.” There was a sensual pang deep within her sex.
“Do you still want to unbind our spirits?”
She shook her head. “But it means you have to accept sharing me with Maximon.”
His lip curl in revulsion. “It’s bad enough being cast aside while knowing you had bonded to him. Now you not only expect me to tolerate it—but to participate.”
“You were tolerant before?” There was a dubious edge to her voice.
“Tolerant because I knew you’d marked yourself on his spirit. I couldn’t murder him knowing he had no choice but to bond to you.” He swallowed and gave a pained grunt. “Maybe, also, I understood why you picked him over me a few times. I may have had it coming the first time. Maybe one other time, too. That’s all I’ll acknowledge.”
Michelle snuggled closer and gazed into his eyes. “So, give him that consideration again. You know how bad he wants me; just as bad as you do. Tolerate this situation. Isn’t it better to have part of me than none at all?”
He gave her a look of seething resentment. “I’m not a dog who can be satisfied with table scraps.”
“This isn’t—”
“I deserve better than this. I refuse to play your games. Get rid of Maximon. He’s unworthy of you anyway.”
“He’s not unworthy. What? Because he uses the spirit world to manipulate the stock market?”
He craned back his head from her. “Of course you sympathize with him. You always have.”
“We’re in human forms and we have to get by as humans. There’s a lot worse we could do with our powers. Explain to me why it’s wrong. In real terms. Not just honor or sacredness or any of that stuff.”
“If we use our powers for financial gain we’re no better than…” He gave a bodily shudder. “We are the B’alam. We’re supposed to protect the mortal world, not plunder it.”
Michelle became silent. The words permeated her like a revelation. “That’s our purpose?”
“Yes.” His voice held sober conviction. “This is why we’re present in the world of man. Lifetime after lifetime.”
She drew her lips into her mouth to wet them. “We’re just humans though. Most of the time, anyway. We still need to get by. Why can’t we live a little better than the rest of humanity? I mean, we’re gods, and you said we’re protecting mankind.”
“You’ve said these same words to me in a hundred other lifetimes.” His yellow eyes fixed on her. “You’re always tolerant in your youth, but eventually you come to understand why cheating the spirit world is vile. You refuse to put up with it.”
She drew a long breath. “You described your human self as the poorest of the poor. How did you go from that to hotel suites at the Four Seasons?”
“Treasure hunting in an ancient life. You helped me find the bulk of it in a lagoon three hundred years ago. We hid it in the jungle, taking only what we needed for that lifetime. I did this several times, then you had me buy bonds with it. When our span was nearing its end we cashed the bonds and bought more gold, then hid the gold for me to reclaim in another life. When I did, I’d take the gold and buy bonds with it, just as you had shown me. I’d live off the interest. Sometimes with you. Other times by myself. Then I’d cash the bonds in when I was near the end of my span to buy gold to hide for the next life.”
She tsked. “How is this any different than what Maximon does?”
“What we do hurts no one. What he does manipulates the destinies of mortal companies. Granting an advantage to one to the detriment of all who oppose it.”
“That’s debatable, I guess. Sometimes I’d see demons in my mom’s field that were going to make her get into a car accident or lose her job. Obviously I’d kill them before they could hurt her. But bad things still happened to her. My grandma still died. I still flunked Statistics. Some bad things are meant to happen, and other things are demons infiltrating people or companies and screwing things up. I say the fewer demons the better. Even if it gives one company an advantage. They aren’t supposed to be there in the first place.”
“You always find some reasoning to justify him.” He stared outward with a scowl. “Even if this is milder than his other schemes, it’s still a scheme. It’s still inexcusable.”
Whatever.
“Maximon will be fine once you remove your bond with him. His appetite for mortal women keeps him contented. Leave him to his excess and excrement. I can only find contentment with you.”
“I need to know why I bonded with both of you before I do anything.”
“Let’s go to the spirit world. I’ll come to your stream and show you the way.”
He transformed into a jaguar with a head as big as her human one. Michelle transformed and was overcome by power of their connection. This was different than what she’d felt with Maximon. Yes, she’d known him from past lives also, but not like this. Votan was like a part of herself, as familiar as her own hand. Nestling beside him became emotional. They’d had strife before, but now she felt they were at peace. Her heart craved that peace with him so much. He was her true love, and it was just as he’d said.
They’d been apart far too long.
Please let there be a way for this to all work out.
She lowered her head beside him and went to sleep.
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Chapter 10
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When her eyes opened next there was one thing she was sure of: this wasn’t the spirit world.
She was in her human form—something that had never happened before outside the mortal realm. Her wrists and ankles were bound by iron loops that connected diagonally to two posts flanking each side of her. She gaped down at herself to see that she was only wearing a tiny jaguar patterned bikini.
&nbs
p; What the fuck is going on?
She was on a desolate plain, hard packed gravel beneath her and a black starless sky above her. There was a whispery howl coming from all around her. Like gusting wind, except there was no wind. She realized it was the sound of demon voices.
Michelle tested the restraints. They had no give. What if she transformed? Would she tear herself apart? That would be fine if this was the spirit world. She’d merely wake up. She had no idea what the Hell this place was.
“Sorry for the intrusion,” a male voice came from behind her.
Michelle craned her head to look. She recognized the tall pale-skinned man with long black hair as none other than Caquix. Instead of a suit he was wearing some black leather body-suit and a cape made of black feathers. For a moment her terror was overcome by a sense of awe.
“And sorry for binding you.” He came around to stand in front of her. “I wasn’t sure how you’d react, so I had to take measures to protect myself. Especially after Maximon tried to kill me at the café.”
She was suspended with her body prone to him. Her breaths grew more rapid. The figure before her was as fearsome as a fireball. She feared his touch as much as she would a hot poker.
“I had to interfere with your little excursion with Votan. Do you realize what he was about to do?”
She shook her head a millimeter in each opposing direction.
“He was going to hold you down in your stream until your goddess essence consumed you.”
The words were gibberish strung together to her ears. She had to reach through her fear to comprehend them.
“What?”
“You wished to understand why Ixchel bonded with two mates. The only way to do that is to become Ixchel. He was going to force you. Michelle was going to be destroyed and only Ixchel would remain for this lifetime.”
Her gaze lowered. It was true. That’s how she would learn all her goddess motives. Votan was going to meet her in her stream. All he had to do was push her into it and hold her down. He was stronger than her in all realms. She wouldn’t have been able to escape the stream no matter how much it overwhelmed her.
“Oh my God.”
Mated to the Jaguars - Paranormal M/F/M Menage Page 5
