Losing Control

by Jarman, Jessica

  With a groan, he drew away and searched her face. “Maggie, I’m not complaining, mind you. But what’s going on?”

  She caught her bottom lip between her teeth and stepped back. “I’m tired of fighting.”

  His heart lurched. “Fighting what?”

  “What’s between us. I want you,” she whispered. “But I’m worried.”

  He reached for her hand and pulled her back against him. “About what?”

  “How things between us will affect your friendship, and business, with Cal. I don’t want to come between you.” She tilted her head back to hold his gaze.

  “Your brother has been a big fan of us getting together,” he chuckled, “so I don’t think we have to worry about his disapproval.”

  “I know, but what about when it’s over? I don’t want there to be hard feelings or…” She dropped her head forward, resting it against his chest.

  Spence closed his eyes. She’d said “when”, not “if”. It was clear that she placed any relationship between them in the temporary category. A part of him wanted to rage against that, but he knew that would only serve to push her away. He wrapped his arms around her and held her tightly, pressing a kiss to the top of her head.

  “Don’t worry about Cal and I—we’re solid. Let’s just,” he tightened his embrace a moment, “focus on us right now.”

  When she pulled away, she gave him a trembling smile. “I have to go to work, but maybe later…”

  “Definitely later,” he murmured.

  “Um, my place isn’t going to work. Not with Mom there. And in the same apartment as my brother just, well, doesn’t appeal.” She grimaced. “A hotel room?”

  “No need,” he assured. “I took the apartment across the hall from Cal.”

  “Oh,” she said happily. “That’s a relief. I’ll come after work then.”

  He covered her mouth with his, in a hard, quick kiss. “Looking forward to it. Come on, I’ll walk you out.”

  Hand in hand, they walked out of the building. After kissing her goodbye, he watched her hurry down the street toward the bookstore. Once she was out of sight, he ran a hand through his hair, and with a sigh, headed back inside. He went upstairs and went to Cal’s apartment. Without knocking, he entered. His friend was in the kitchen, assembling two massive sandwiches.

  “Hope one of those is for me.”

  “Grab a few beers from the fridge, will ya? Be done here in a sec.”

  Spence went to the fridge and, grabbing the beers, brought them to the small table. He plopped onto the chairs, stretched his legs out in front of him and crossed his ankles.

  “So?” Cal set the plates on the table and sat across from Spence.

  “So.” Spence took a bite and washed it down with a swig of beer.

  “Has my sister finally come to her senses?”

  “She’s coming by tonight,” he said between bites. “Seems open to seeing where things go.”

  “And you don’t sound as happy as I’d expect.”

  “I’m happy, but she made it pretty clear that she expects this to end fairly quickly. I figure she decided not to fight it but expects it to burn out.” He shrugged a shoulder, trying not to let on how much that bothered him. That, underneath the anticipation of the coming night and happiness that Maggie wasn’t running from him anymore, the fact Maggie saw their relationship with an expiration date infuriated him.

  “So what are you going to do?” Call asked. “Or do you expect it to fizzle out too?”

  “I don’t expect anything. I’m willing to see where this goes, and while she says she is too, talking about when it ends shows that she sees this as a fling, not anything long-term. “He took a long draw from his bottle. “So what am I going to do?” he repeated Cal’s question. “See where it goes and if I can convince your sister that this isn’t short-term.”

  “Good luck with that,” his friend said rolling his eyes.

  “You don’t think I can change her mind?”

  “Look, I hope you do, really and sincerely. But, as much as I love Mags, when she makes her mind up about something, she’s like a rabid dog with its teeth sunk deep. It’s going to be tough to make her let go.” Cal shook his head then repeated, “I hope you can. I think you’re great for her even if she doesn’t see it.”

  “I’m sure your seal of approval will make all the difference to her,” Spence said dryly.

  “Yeah, start building your case with that tidbit.” Cal laughed.

  Spence stood, brought his plate to the sink, and deposited his empty in the recycling. “Thanks for lunch. I’m going to clean up downstairs.” He grimaced as he thought of the forgotten brushes and palettes. “Then I need to go shopping. My fridge is bare.”

  Cal stood as well. “Go on. I’ll take care of downstairs.”

  Clapping a hand on his friend’s shoulder, Spence nodded his thanks then headed to the door. “Thanks.”

  Now he just had to figure out what he needed for his first night with Maggie. This wouldn’t be a hurried fucking with them half-dressed. No, tonight would be about seduction, about showing Maggie Monroe this wasn’t just sex. It was much, much more.

  * * * *

  Maggie climbed the steps to the floor that housed Cal’s and Spencer’s apartments. She cursed her jumping nerves and sweating palms. As she came to a halt at the apartment door, she tugged at the pencil skirt she wore then straightened her fitted jacket. Maybe she should have gone home and changed before coming. She had way sexier outfits in her closet. Then she remembered his words during the phone call that interrupted her date.

  Are you wearing one of those hot little suits?

  Seemed as though he liked her choice of clothing, though she was thankful she’d taken care not to wear granny panties or her more sensible bra.

  The thought of pulling off the outer layers and standing before Spence in just her lingerie then taking that off…stole her breath. The thought of him stripping down to the skin… Oh. She pressed her thighs together and inhaled deeply as heat pooled in her core.

  She blew the breath out through pursed lips then, before she could second guess herself, she lifted her hand and knocked.

  “Come in.” Spencer’s muffled voice reached her ears.

  Opening the door, she took a step then faltered to a stop as Spencer strode across the room to meet her at the door. He cupped her face and lowered his head. His lips met hers in a gentle, all-too-brief kiss. He straightened and smiled down at her.

  “Hi,” he murmured, running his thumb over her bottom lip.

  “H-h-hi,” she echoed, keeping her eyes locked with his as she shut the door blindly. The scent of roasted chicken flooded her nostrils as she inhaled sharply. Her stomach rumbled, reminding her that she’d skipped lunch.

  “Hungry?” Spencer chuckled. “Good.”

  He took her hand and led her to the table. Pulling a chair out, he gestured for her to sit. Again, she cursed the butterflies as he pressed a kiss to her palm before letting go and turning toward the stove. She took a moment to catch her breath and look around the small apartment. He didn’t have much in the way of furniture that she could see—a couch, the table she sat at, and one shelf unit with books neatly lining the shelves.

  “You didn’t have to do this,” she said quietly.

  “Do what?” he asked without turning.

  “Cook and clean for me.” She gestured toward the clean living space. “I didn’t exactly come here for—” Cheeks burning, she bit her lip.

  He looked over his shoulder at her, grin tilting his lips. “I enjoy cooking, and I have to eat. And I didn’t clean for you. I actually like my things where they belong.”

  “Oh, sorry.” She cringed, feeling like an ass.

  He chuckled and turned back to carving the chicken. “Don’t worry about it.”

  “No, really, I’m sorry. I just figured because you were so comfortable at Cal’s that you—”

  “—were a slob too?” he finished with a laugh. “His place,
Maggie. His stuff.” He shrugged then turned toward her, holding two plates. After setting them on the table, he dropped a kiss on the top of Maggie’s head. “Your brother and I are friends with a lot in common, but we are not the same person.”

  She studied him silently as he took the seat across from her. As he brought a forkful of chicken to his mouth, he winked.

  “Eat up, darlin’, before it gets cold.”

  Deciding to let it drop since he seemed willing to, she took a bite and hummed in pleasure as the creamy mashed potatoes hit her mouth. “Very good,” she murmured.

  “Thanks. So,” he took a sip of water, “how was your day?”

  “My day?” She wrinkled her nose. “Long.” Mostly because she’d spent the entire time thinking about coming here. And dinner and conversation didn’t factor high in those musings, but she’d play along. “And yours?”

  “Nothing too exciting. Painted, shopped, cooked. Waited for you,” he said softly.

  Maggie fought not to let her eyes close at the rough tone of his voice. Desire spiraled through her belly downward. His gaze lowered to her lips as she wet them with her tongue.

  She inhaled deeply then smiled as she laid her silverware beside her plate. “Well, no more waiting.”

  Rising to her feet, she stepped toward him and held out a hand, palm up. Without a word, he laid his palm against hers and stood. He brought her hand to his mouth and kissed it before pulling her toward the bedroom.

  “I even made the bed with clean sheets,” he teased as they entered the room.

  Maggie’s cheeks warmed and she rolled her eyes. “Ha ha.”

  Spencer laughed and drew her against him, her back to his front, resting his chin on the top of her head, arms wrapped tightly around her.

  Heat spread through her, their clothing between them an annoyance. She squirmed and moaned as his cock butted against the small of her back. His hard, thick cock… Her eyes slid shut as she remembered how he’d felt sliding into her, ramming into her again and again… Another moan strangled in her throat.

  Spence ran a palm up and over her belly, his fingers trailing along the row of buttons of her blouse until he reached the top one. Her breath stuttered as button by button her blouse opened to his touch. When the last was undone, she stepped away and turned toward him. Shrugging first out of her jacket, she then met his gaze as she let the blouse slip from her shoulders and down her arms.

  “Don’t stop now, darlin’.” His lips curved. “I’ve waited a very long time to see you out of your suit, Maggie Monroe. All of you.”

  Maggie’s stomach tightened deliciously, and she carefully stepped out of her heels and kicked them to the side. Her hands shook as she reached behind to lower the zipper on the back of her skirt. A thrill shot through her as she watched Spencer’s hands clench and unclench as the garment whispered down her legs to pool at her feet. She couldn’t deny how good it felt to know he was as affected by her as she was by him. And oh God, she was affected. Even now, her silken panties were damp, and she ached to get them off and jump Spencer. But a quick fuck wasn’t in the cards tonight. There was no hurry, no possibility of getting caught in the act. They could take their time and savor each other.

  “You,” she drawled, moving close to him and gripping the hem of his T-shirt, “are over-dressed.”

  He dipped his head and caught her mouth with his. After a swipe of tongue and hard press of lips, he murmured, “Let’s remedy that.” He straightened and lifted his arms over his head.

  “Gladly.” Maggie dragged his shirt up, and with his help, off. Trailing her hands over his pecs, she leaned forward and kissed him in the center of his chest. His scent flooded her nostrils—subtle but spicy aftershave mixed with a fragrance all his own. She hummed low in her throat and reached for the waistband of his jeans.

  As she unsnapped the closure and lowered the zipper of his jeans, Spencer brought his hands to her hair and gently removed the band holding it back in a simple ponytail. The freed strands fell around her shoulders. Lowering his head, he pressed a kiss on the curve of her breast above the turquoise silk and lace bra. He ran his tongue along the edge, and Maggie struggled to keep her focus on the task at hand—get Spencer Reed out of his clothes.

  When his fingers whispered over her hips and slid just under her panties, she quickly dropped her hands and covered his hands with hers.

  “Ah, ah, ah,” she said as he straightened. “You first.”

  He chuckled and pulled his hands away. “Yes, ma’am.”

  Grasping the waistband of his jeans, Maggie clucked her tongue. “There’s that Southern charm.”

  “Darlin’, you ain’t seen nothin’ yet.” He grinned.

  “Oh,” she knelt down and slowly lowered his jeans, “but I’m going to.”

  Once he’d stepped out of the pants, she trailed her hands up his legs, the coarse hair tickling as she went. After a moment of hesitation, she leaned forward and kissed his stomach before pulling down his boxers. Her breath left her in a whoosh when his cock sprang free. There wasn’t any hesitation now, no shyness. She reached up and cupped his balls, then with the tip of her tongue, she licked up his length, smiling inwardly when he muttered a curse and wobbled slightly on his feet.

  She looked up his body and met his heavy-lidded gaze, continuing to fondle him. He brushed her hair back from her face.

  “You’re beautiful,” he said hoarsely.

  She didn’t answer, though her stomach jumped at the compliment; instead, she circled the base of his cock with her free hand and took him into her mouth. The salty essence oozing from the tip kissed her tongue and danced along her senses. Easing back, she swirled her tongue around his cockhead before quickly swallowing him again.

  His fingers tightening in her hair and his rocking hips told Maggie the pace she set was just right. He swelled in her mouth, throbbed against her cheeks as she worked up and down. Then he was tugging on her hair, pulling her off of him.

  “Spencer…” She frowned up at him, strangely disappointed he hadn’t come.

  “There will plenty of time for that, darlin’,” he promised, rubbing the pad of his thumb across her lower lip. “For now, though, I want to see you, all of you, before I bury myself inside your heat.”

  Darting out her tongue to lave the digit, Maggie stood. As soon as she was on her feet, Spencer yanked her against him and claimed her mouth. God, she loved the taste of him—all of him. Loved how he felt pressed against her, how he knew just how to touch her. Hell, she even loved talking with man. She couldn’t get enough of him. And that, deep down, scared the hell out of her. What if this was a disaster? What if she couldn’t get him out of her system?

  Spencer’s fingers flicking open the clasp of her bra pulled her from her thoughts. He dragged the straps down her arms and threw the garment to the side then his mouth was on her, pulling one nipple into his mouth roughly. As he teased the tight tip, the sensations he incited inside her drowned her thoughts and doubts.

  Rolling the slick nipple between his thumb and forefinger, he moved to the other. He caught it between his teeth, and Maggie gripped his biceps and choked out a cry as an arc of heat blazed from her breast to her clit.

  He laved the small ache then straightened, the corner of his mouth quirked up in a half-smile.

  “S-sit down,” she stammered.

  When he stepped back and lowered himself to the edge of the bed, she moved forward and rested a foot next to him and began rolling the thigh high stocking down her leg. He reached out and took over, pressing kisses along the skin as it was exposed. Switching legs, Maggie bit her lip as he caressed her inner thigh along the edge of her panties. Her pussy clenched in anticipation. All she needed to do was tilt into his touch and his fingers would brush across her. Instead she lowered her now-bare leg and made quick work of shucking her panties. Screw the teasing and going slow; she wanted him inside her.

  Stepping between his knees, Maggie pushed on his shoulders until he lay on the mattress. Her
heart hammered wildly as she straddled his hips. His cock slipped through her damp folds, grazing her swollen clit. She rotated her hips and moaned at the sweet friction. Before she could shift and position him at her entrance, Spencer wrapped his arms around her tightly and rolled. Maggie narrowed her eyes at him, but said nothing. She certainly wasn’t going to admit she loved the feel of his weight pressing her into the mattress, and his skin on hers. No, he had too much power over her already, even if he didn’t realize it.

  Spence looked down at Maggie, her face flushed, swollen lips parted, and blonde hair spread beneath her. She couldn’t possibly understand the effect she had on him. He was falling for this prickly Monroe faster than he cared to admit.

  “God, you’re beautiful,” he said again, unable to keep the thought to himself. “Just when I think I can’t want you more… You take my breath away.”

  Her lips curved. “Really?” She shook her head slightly, seeming to regret the breathy question. “Well, it’s a good thing I want you, too.”

  She stretched up and kissed along the pulse at his throat, and his cock swelled even more at the soft touch, nudging her sex.

  He closed his eyes, knowing full well what she was doing. She wanted the focus to be solely on the physical. Her teeth scraped along the sensitive skin where his neck met his shoulder. All right, then. He was willing to let it go. For now. Shifting away from her slightly, Spence met her gaze.

  “Scoot up a bit,” he said.

  She complied, and he positioning himself between her legs, then sat back on his heels and took in the delectable sight of her.

  Running a finger from her bellybutton to the curls shielding her pussy, he tried to focus on her expression as he slipped between the folds, but his hand shook slightly when her slick, hot juices coated his finger. Maggie moaned and her eyes closed as she raised her hips.

  The need to bury his head between her thighs overwhelmed him. He moved down the mattress, nudging her legs farther apart, until his stomach rested against the comforter. Her glistening pussy before him, he closed his eyes and drew in a deep breath. The scent of her arousal filled his senses completely. Pushing his hands beneath her ass, he lifted and tasted. He drove his tongue into her heat, and she cried out loudly as he drank in her sweetness.