by Mindy Carter
Although Keegan and I may finally get our second chance, I’m still a little nervous because a lot has changed. Will he like the adult I have turned into? Will he still be the same sweet and caring boy he was when we were kids?
After the interview, we both decided to finish the workday at home. Olivia, our boss and friend, allows us to do that sometimes. Able to go home and slip on my comfortable clothes, I change into my black yoga pants and my I Love New York shirt. Then Reese sits with me on our plush, grey sofa while I surf through the TV channels to find something to watch, and Reese begins to grill me on the details of Keegan’s interview.
“So, he acted like he didn’t know you?”
“Yes, and I was devastated. He even formally introduced himself to me, so I was sure he had no clue who I was. It was nerve racking. I even tried asking a question about his childhood, hoping to jog his memory.”
“But when his hot brother came in, he recognized you instantly, and that’s when he remembered? Aimee, this is all very confusing.”
“Tell me about it. Kaleb was so happy to see me, and Keegan was all brooding. He knew it was me. I even asked him about it, and he asked me why I didn’t act like I knew him. That kind of stung, you know. He left me when I was seventeen to go to college, and I never got one phone call or a letter.”
Of course, I know why he didn’t call me or write. It was because I, Aimee Brennan, ruined our carefree, easy friendship with one mistake.
The night before Keegan was set to leave for college, we decided to hit one last high school party. It was a hot August night. I can remember the yellow sundress I wore like it was yesterday. Keegan was dressed in his usual khaki shorts and white button down shirt. When he picked me up and we drove to the party together, I remember being so sad because I knew I was going to miss my best friend like nothing else.
“So, are you ready for one final night of debauchery, my pretty partner in crime?”
“Absolutely,” I answer, trying to hold back tears.
“We can hang out for as long as you want, and then, after, we can head to the park if you want. I know how much you like to be pushed on those swings.”
“I do love those swings, and the higher you push me, the better.”
“It’s a plan, Sam.”
As soon as we arrive at Anthony Myers’ house—one of Keegan’s friends from the baseball team—everyone is in full swing. I don’t think anyone is sober. He lives a little farther out of town, and they have a huge plot of land, so everyone is scattered.
Keegan says hi to Anthony, and they talk about baseball as usual. Then we start to walk away when Kim Stuart, Keegan’s ex, approaches us, running her fingernail down his arm and whispering in his ear. When he laughs and smiles at her, she tells him to find her later.
I hate Kim. She’s always mean to me when Keegan isn’t around, like a total bitch. All the guys give her tons of attention, and it’s apparent she puts out on a regular basis. I’m pretty sure Keegan knows all about it, too.
I’m a little hurt, thinking she is going to monopolize even a minute of the time he’s promised to me. He’s my best friend, and we have spent just about every day together since we were six years old. She doesn’t even acknowledge my presence, so I’m elated when Keegan doesn’t watch her walk away.
That’s Keegan’s thing—if he’s really interested in someone, he makes a point to watch them walk away. I have seen him do it a ton, and although he’s not your typical, horny teenager, he is a guy.
We spend time with a bunch of our friends and have a little too much to drink, so we decide to just stay at the party and sober up before leaving. Keegan eventually grabs me by the arm and leads me away from everyone.
“Let’s go over here and talk. I have something for you,” he says.
“I hope you’re not going to take me all the way over there just to scare me, Keegan.”
“Of course not. I don’t like scaring innocent drunks.”
“I am not drunk. I am going to remember every minute of this night for as long as I live.”
“Whatever you say, Aimee.”
Reaching a small clearing with a beautiful, wooden bench, we sit down next to one another and stare at the stars. Keegan and I love looking at the twinkling stars and always point out our favorite constellations. Keegan’s favorite is Orion, one of the first ones I see. Mine is the tried and true Big Dipper. We are quite a nerdy pair sometimes.
“Aimee?”
“Keegan?”
“Do me a favor and close your eyes.”
“Umm … okay.”
The next thing I feel is my long hair being pushed to the side. I experience a numb, tingling sensation where he touches my skin while moving my hair. Then I feel the cool chain of a necklace around my neck before he clasps the necklace and places my hair back. Goose bumps immediately break out over my entire body. This is all new and strange, but I like the way he makes me feel.
“Open your eyes, Aimee.”
“Keegan, what is this?”
Hanging around my neck is the most exquisite star pendent encrusted with tiny diamonds. It looks beautiful in the moonlight.
I start to cry. This is a good-bye gift, and I don’t want to say good-bye.
“Oh, Aimee, don’t cry. I just wanted to give you something to remind you of me when I’m not here.”
“Keegan James, you are a part of me. I don’t need reminding, and you shouldn’t have spent your money on me.”
“How come I knew you were going to say that, Brennan? Oh, because I know you. And you’re keeping the necklace. When you wear it, you can think of us, right now, looking at the stars.”
I place my head on his shoulder. “It’s the most beautiful thing anyone has ever given me, Keegan. I love it. Really, thank you. It means a lot.”
As we both stare at each other, I don’t know if it’s the alcohol running through me, but I lean forward in that moment and press my lips to his. I begin to kiss him while he stays frighteningly still. After a moment, he kisses me back, and it is the most perfect moment ever. Everything around us disappears.
Closing my eyes, I no longer hear the crickets chirping, but the sound of my heavily beating heart. The warm breeze blows through my hair, and the scent of honeysuckle surrounds us. The taste of beer on his tongue makes me suddenly need to deepen the kiss, so I grab his head pulling him closer.
“Aimee, why?” he asks.
“You didn’t like it?” I have only kissed a few guys, so I could be a bad kisser. Still, I haven’t had any complaints. I’ve dreamed about this for so long. In this moment, I don’t regret it. I didn’t want him to leave without knowing what our kiss would feel like.
“No, it was fine, better than fine, but this—we … It’s just, this isn’t why I brought you out here,” he tries to explain.
“I know that.”
It hits me like a ton of bricks. What the hell did I just do?
He looks at me with pain on his face. “It’s okay, Aimee. We can forget this happened, and I’ll drop you off at home. I still need to finish packing since we’re leaving early in the morning.”
“Okay,” I say. “Keegan, I’m sorry, so, so sorry.”
His rejection is unexpected. I never predicted a declaration of love, but the pain in his eyes is enough to break my heart. I care for him so much, and seeing that I have caused him this despair makes me feel awful.
The sounds of the party still in full swing take me out of my thoughts as he rubs my back then stands. “Don’t be sorry. There is nothing to be sorry about.”
“Keegan, can you stop by my house before you leave? I want to say good-bye sober.”
“Sure,” he answers in a low whisper.
That was the last time I saw Keegan until today. He never said good-bye and never returned. His parents soon moved away, and then I left for college the following summer. A childhood friendship shattered in a moment just because of one kiss. That will forever stay with me.
I still have the necklac
e he gave me, but it was too hard wearing it after that night. I guess, after he never showed to say good-bye, it was his way of breaking our friendship off. If I could only rewind and leave the party then go to the park, instead, things would have been very different.
“Aimee, are you okay?” Reese asks.
“Yes, I’m good. It’s just a lot. It’s been eight years, and it’s almost like nothing has changed.”
“I get it, Aimee. If I was in your shoes, I would probably be a mess, too, but just maybe, this is all meant to be. Whatever pulled you apart years ago could’ve all happened for a reason. You were just a teenager then and had no idea what you wanted.”
I have always known what I wanted. I have no doubt about that.
“I know why he didn’t call me,” I whisper.
I haven’t told her, but I decide, since we are talking about this, I might as well get it off my chest.
I let out an exasperated breath. “It was my fault. I did something stupid.”
“I don’t think there was anything you could’ve possibly done for your best friend to abandon you.” Reese sighs. “Aimee, you are one of the kindest and most selfless people I know.”
I let out another breath, forcing the tears away. “The night before he left for college, I got a little drunk—well, we both did—and I kissed him. Everything was perfect until then. He totally freaked out on me and wanted to forget the entire moment. I was embarrassed and hurt. To top it all off, my best friend and the boy I had spent every single day with since I was six years old cut me off without a good-bye when he left me. It was the worst time of my life next to losing my mom, but you know what? If it wasn’t for meeting him during that time, I’m not sure I could’ve ever gotten through it.”
“Let me ask you one question.” Reese stares at me.
“What?”
“Did he kiss you back?”
I nod. It was the best kiss I’d ever had, and there hasn’t been one since that has compared. It was the most magical and perfect kiss ever. He kissed me back, and it felt right. For a moment, as crazy as it sounds, it felt like he felt the same way, too.
“Like I said, it was my fault. He didn’t feel the same way, and he probably never will.”
“I don’t believe that. He kissed you back, and from what I saw today, I’m sure he liked it as much as you did.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean his body language and the way he looked at you. I could feel it, and I was only in the room with you for a few moments,” she tells me.
“It just seems too good to be true. I have no idea who he is anymore. His favorite movie used to be The Godfather. I have no clue what it is now. I don’t know anything about him except what is published.”
“What’s your favorite movie, Aimee?”
“The Notebook,” I respond, even though she already knows. I mean, what best friend doesn’t?
“How long has it been your favorite?”
“Since I cried like a baby in the movie theatre.”
“So maybe The Godfather is still his. Like they say, the more things change, the more they stay the same.”
“Thank you, doctor. What do I owe you?”
“As usual, it’s free to you, but chocolate ice cream is always good as payment,” she retorts.
I smile. I could really go for a carton of double chocolate.
“We should totally watch The Notebook tonight, by the way, and pig out on ice cream,” she states excitedly.
That is exactly why I love Reese. She’s knows me, and although I lost Keegan all those years ago, I gained her in the process. I hope and pray it’s always like this: fun and easy.
“Ryan Gosling, coming up,” I say.
“I’ll get the ice cream and tissues.”
I feel so much better now. I couldn’t be more excited about our evening with my favorite movie and ice cream with my favorite girl. I will worry about tomorrow, tomorrow. I’m me, and Keegan is who he is. There is nothing for me to do except what I did years before—just move on.
Reese and I watch The Notebook twice then move on to her favorite movie, How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days, that coincidently hasn’t changed since the first time she watched it.
There is something to be said about the power of a good girls’ night in, because I’m starting to feel better about everything.
***
It’s early Saturday morning, and I’m lying in bed, staring at the ceiling when a ding alerts me to a text. I grab my phone from my nightstand and look to see a text from none other than Kaleb. I’m a little disappointed that it’s not from Keegan, but who am I kidding? He’s not that guy. He’s a busy man who runs a company.
Hey, home fry, you awake?
I laugh at his text, replying, Home Fry? Really, Kaleb? You haven’t changed one bit.
Sure I have, and you will find out tonight.
I shake my head as I type back, Looking forward to it.
Do you know where Paragon is?
Yes, why SOHO? Aren’t you slumming it?
Keegan wanted to go somewhere close by you so you don’t have a long drive. That guy’s still looking out for you.
I don’t remember telling either one of them my address.
Have you boys taken on stalking in your spare time? How do you know where I live?
I wait for his response, curious at what his answer will be.
I can tell you, but I may have to kill you. Let’s just say we pay people a hefty price to find things out.
Of course they do. I’m suddenly irritated by this. If they have had these people at their disposal, why couldn’t Keegan reach out to me earlier?
Kaleb sends another message, taking me out of my thoughts.
7 sound good? And don’t forget to bring that sweet looking photographer.
As if Reese would let me go without her.
I think she’s washing her hair tonight…lol
Same old Aimee. See you then.
Kaleb is one of the sweetest and funniest guys I have ever met, and I’m excited to see if Reese thinks so, too. It almost feels like a double date—well, except none of us are dating.
I start to think about what I am going to wear. I think I need to go shopping.
Heading into our small kitchen, I find Reese sitting at our tiny table with a cup of coffee and a smile on her face.
“So shopping?” she says, reading me perfectly.
“Absolutely. Kaleb just texted me. We’re meeting at Paragon at seven”
“Interesting,” she says.
“I guess. Keegan apparently doesn’t want us having to drive across the city, and it seems they have people who find things out for them, like the addresses of women they are planning on having drinks with.”
Reese looks at me in confusion, but then her look changes as she realizes what I’m hinting at.
“Sounds good. Drink up. We have a lot to do before seven.”
Yep, I have a feeling I’m putting a dent in my credit card today.
Chapter Five
I’m exhausted. Reese and I shopped till we dropped, literally. We went from Chanel to Bloomingdales and every other boutique we could get into. As always, we had a great time, and I started to feel good about tonight’s outing.
After we got home, I checked my messages, finding nothing from Keegan. I’m not sure why I keep hoping he will text, maybe simply to take the awkwardness out of this whole ordeal. I keep imagining us catching up and starting our friendship where we left off, hanging out and being inseparable again. A little naïve, I know, but these are the things I have always hoped for over the years. Yes, he hurt me, but above anything else, we were best friends.
Now I’m looking at some of my new purchases, and yes, I’m wearing those lucky shoes of mine. There was no need to purchase any footwear. Reese convinced me to get a simple but sweet BCBG, black, sleeveless, lace cocktail dress. I didn’t want to spend an arm and a leg, but when I tried the dress on, the material felt so good against my skin. It made m
e feel beautiful, so I absolutely had to get it. You can never have too many little, black dresses. Reese ended up getting an ice blue, capped-sleeve, fitted mini dress that she looks stunning in.
I’m just about ready with my hair curled in waves flowing down my back and my make-up on. I put my dress on then spray my favorite perfume before I grab my black clutch off my dresser and place the essentials for a night out inside: lipstick, money, ID, and my phone. Then I walk out of my bedroom and knock on Reese’s door to tell her the cab will be picking us up in about ten minutes. I’m getting anxious.
When Reese enters the living room, she looks as stunning as ever, and I double-check myself to see if I look all right.
“Don’t you dare,” she says.
“Do I look okay? It’s not too short?”
“You could wear a trash bag and still look fine, and by fine, I mean sizzling hot.”
“I wouldn’t go that far, Reese.”
“We both look hot, and I’m sure those guys won’t be able to take their eyes off us.”
“This isn’t a date,” I remind her.
“If you say so.”
“Are you ready?”
“Yep, after you.”
As we exit our building, the cab pulls up. Both Reese and I get in then tell the driver where to drop us. The city is as lively as ever, and my heart begins to beat a little faster. When we arrive at Paragon, it is packed, and I have no idea how I’m going to find Kaleb and Keegan. As a result we approach a host and tell her we are meeting Mr. James. She looks us over as if sizing us up. I’m not sure if I should be offended, but whatever.
“Mr. James has a special table reserved in our private area. Just follow me this way.”
We nod and follow her.
The lighting is dim as we weave through all the people in the bar. In only a short walk, we are taken to the private area which is surprisingly full of people, as well. I spot Kaleb and smile, but I don’t see Keegan. I can’t help feeling disappointed, thinking maybe he changed his mind and doesn’t want to catch up.
As we approach his table, I notice Kaleb is wearing black slacks and a white button down shirt, and Reese is eyeing him. I look at her and silently tell her with my eyes, “down girl.”
